Topic: The small things in life that really hannoy

[Maggie May]

  So sorry for you mate.

We are rehoming a dog and he should be with us this weekend but i even said to the missus ' dont want an older dog, dont want it to pass away quickly '. When my Zeus passed away i didnt eat for two weeks and just sat by his grave every night. We dont half get attached to the loyal little fuckers

Take care mate,

Carl

Indeed we do.  I did the same thing when my Sam died.  Never spoken about it until now.  Makes me love you even more beloved Grandling.  Best love to you and Brian. 

[Brian Blessed]

Thanks Mags and Karl, very much appreciate it.

And sorry for derailing the thread!

[Zephyr]

Other students.

[Motty]

People who derail threads

Condolences on your Pugs mate ,really bad luck losing two in the same year.

[rob1966]

Sound mate. Still loving the Reds but couldn't be arsed with going round the houses any more. Stay off the footy threads.

Yeah, safest option.

[Nice Guy Davey]

Sorry to hear about your pugs mate and  on a dog theme. People who walk their dogs and pick up the shite in them little black bags and then lash them in our front garden. It's your dog and it's your shite, take it home with you. Can't wait to catch them one day, dirty bastards   

[only6times]

Sorry to hear about your pugs mate and  on a dog theme. People who walk their dogs and pick up the shite in them little black bags and then lash them in our front garden. It's your dog and it's your shite, take it home with you. Can't wait to catch them one day, dirty bastards   

Why would you wanna catch a little bag of shit?

[J_Kopite]

Sorry to hear about your pugs mate and  on a dog theme. People who walk their dogs and pick up the shite in them little black bags and then lash them in our front garden. It's your dog and it's your shite, take it home with you. Can't wait to catch them one day, dirty bastards

That is grim mate

[KillieRed]

Sorry to hear about your pugs mate and  on a dog theme. People who walk their dogs and pick up the shite in them little black bags and then lash them in our front garden. It's your dog and it's your shite, take it home with you. Can't wait to catch them one day, dirty bastards

Our local woods are like that. They go to the bother of picking up the crap then lob it into the trees like some disgusting Christmas tree decorations. Why?

My only thought is that some other dog walker has been around so they pretend to be good guys doing their bit, but then dump the bags at first opportunity. Lazy Bastards.

[Crosby Nick]

My son getting sent home from school sick for the first time this year, on the day we were meant to be taking him to the theatre for his birthday present. Shite timing!

[Brian Blessed]

Maybe he's not a theatre fan and is faking it.

[Crosby Nick]

Maybe he's not a theatre fan and is faking it.

Could be. It's his birthday party on Saturday to though - don't think he'd take the risk of faking it and missing that too!

[tubby]

When you go to wipe your butt and realise you're basically just scraping an entire turd out of there that didn't drop.

[wampa1]

When you go to wipe your butt and realise you're basically just scraping an entire turd out of there that didn't drop.

Million wiping

[Twelfth Man]

Groups of Russians on holiday.  Act like they own the world. But tellingly travel in 'safety in numbers' like their Asiatic brethren they try to distance themselves from.

[Card Cheat]

When you go to wipe your butt and realise you're basically just scraping an entire turd out of there that didn't drop.

That moment where you realise if you'd known you could've just picked it off and saved valuable time and paper, instead of smushing it everywhere.

[Johnny B. Goode]

Life.

Though perhaps not small. Can we have a thread on 'big things in life that really crush your soul'?

[Red Genius]

Life.

Though perhaps not small. Can we have a thread on 'big things in life that really crush your soul'?

Life is great mate! we all have our challenges fella..... I hope you're okay topman!

[Caffeine]

Groups of Russians on holiday.  Act like they own the world. But tellingly travel in 'safety in numbers' like their Asiatic brethren they try to distance themselves from.

Have you noticed how the woman always has to get watermelon at breakfast and put it in the middle of the table for them to share. Proper weird behaviour.

On that note- the way Germans cut up all their dinner into bitesize pieces before eating it so they can hoover it into their faces faster with one hand.

[Sir Harvest Fields]

FSUIPC

[Maggie May]

Have you noticed how the woman always has to get watermelon at breakfast and put it in the middle of the table for them to share. Proper weird behaviour.

On that note- the way Germans cut up all their dinner into bitesize pieces before eating it so they can hoover it into their faces faster with one hand.

To share.  I hate that pseudo cuddly expression.  Bring some food to share.  Sort of earth mothery hippy spread the luurve shite.  Fuck off with that.  My foods me own and I'm sharing it with no bugger.  Well apart from my kittycat Angel.  Obviously.

Oh.  And "Nibbles".  I hate that as well.  Drinkies and nibbles.  Who's coming round?  Rabbits? Mice? Squirrels? Does any human being actually nibble at food?  Fuck off.   

[Elzar]

To share.  I hate that pseudo cuddly expression.  Bring some food to share.  Sort of earth mothery hippy spread the luurve shite.  Fuck off with that.  My foods me own and I'm sharing it with no bugger.  Well apart from my kittycat Angel.  Obviously.

When you are at Buffets in hotels on holiday there is always loads of amazing pastries in the morning. Last time I was feeling particularly greedy and got a massive plate full of them, a guy around my age was doing the same so I gave him a knowing nod. Saw him go back to his table and he put the plate in the middle and all his family took one....

[Maggie May]

On that note- the way Germans cut up all their dinner into bitesize pieces before eating it so they can hoover it into their f off aces faster with one hand.

On a lighter note.  There was this docker who used to cut up his dinner like that and mix it in with the veg mash and gravy and then he'd cut that into slices and then slide his knife under each one and eat  them - rather like a heron swallowing a mackerel.  They used to call him The Sword Swallower.  True story.   

[Maggie May]

When you are at Buffets in hotels on holiday there is always loads of amazing pastries in the morning. Last time I was feeling particularly greedy and got a massive plate full of them, a guy around my age was doing the same so I gave him a knowing nod. Saw him go back to his table and he put the plate in the middle and all his family took one....

Daft sod.  Good for you though.   

[paulrazor]

To share.  I hate that pseudo cuddly expression.  Bring some food to share.  Sort of earth mothery hippy spread the luurve shite.  Fuck off with that.  My foods me own and I'm sharing it with no bugger.  Well apart from my kittycat Angel.  Obviously.

Oh.  And "Nibbles".  I hate that as well.  Drinkies and nibbles.  Who's coming round?  Rabbits? Mice? Squirrels? Does any human being actually nibble at food?  Fuck off.   

worst is if you go to get food

"do you want anything?"
"no"

then when you bring food home they are around it like a fly around shite.

or "do you want anything"
"ill just have some of yours "

egh no piss off

[SamAteTheRedAcid]

Waiting in all day for parcels.

[Zlen]

When you are at Buffets in hotels on holiday there is always loads of amazing pastries in the morning. Last time I was feeling particularly greedy and got a massive plate full of them, a guy around my age was doing the same so I gave him a knowing nod. Saw him go back to his table and he put the plate in the middle and all his family took one....

Great.

[Caffeine]

Cutting an onion and the skin clinging on for dear fucking life then flaking off in tiny bits instead of peeling off nicely.

Stopping vaping because you suspect it gives you mouth ulcers then getting an ulcer anyway.

[Sir Harvest Fields]

Smoke breaks at work. Ok, you want or need a cigarette so you get to go outside and have a chat over a fag etc. This is seen as acceptable as you have cravings/addiction.

Where the fuck is the pub so i can pop out for a pint because im an alcoholic? Ill carry on working whilst you indulge your habit.

[Elzar]

Smoke breaks at work. Ok, you want or need a cigarette so you get to go outside and have a chat over a fag etc. This is seen as acceptable as you have cravings/addiction.

Where the fuck is the pub so i can pop out for a pint because im an alcoholic? Ill carry on working whilst you indulge your habit.

Never got this either. At my old work people were only allowed to smoke at lunch, if they wanted they could have a break but the time would be taken out their lunch.

[Caffeine]

If it's any consolation, you'll get that free time back when you are older and they are dead.

[lauz]

This happens at my work, especially in the afternoon/evening when it quietens down, I just go and eat cake for 5 minutes or so.

[Maggie May]

Waiting in all day for parcels.

Or repair men.  "He will arrive at any time between 9am and 6pm".  Well whoopy fucking do.  So I'll just put my life on hold then for the next nine hours and sit behind the door in case he knocks on it with a feather duster and I can't hear.  But no.  That's fine.  I had fuck all to do anyway as you clearly realised.  Bastards.

[KillieRed]

Fly tippers.

Saw two TVs dumped on a recently made piece of waste ground today and wondered how lazy these people are.

The worst thing is our council dump doesn't charge and you can even get free pick-ups. People are scum.

[Ziltoid]

Or repair men.  "He will arrive at any time between 9am and 6pm".  Well whoopy fucking do.  So I'll just put my life on hold then for the next nine hours and sit behind the door in case he knocks on it with a feather duster and I can't hear.  But no.  That's fine.  I had fuck all to do anyway as you clearly realised.  Bastards.

The Gas were supposed to fit our Smart meter yesterday.  They were supposed to turn up between 10-2.  Our lass took day off work she was owed and waited - they rang at 12:50 and said due to emergencies they couldn't make it!  Why not ring at 9:30 and say that?!  Next available day - 2nd February!!!  Some proper fucking emergencies going on for the next 2 months - don't say i didn't warn you.

[Motty]

Groups of Russians on holiday.  Act like they own the world. But tellingly travel in 'safety in numbers' like their Asiatic brethren they try to distance themselves from.

They don't do que's do they ,ignorant bastards think all us Brits are standing in line waiting for food just for a laugh but their special so they can just go straight to the front. I always shout for them to get to the back so now my family refuse to be seen with me whilst getting food in any all inclusive buffet hall.

[Crosby Nick]

They don't do que's do they ,ignorant bastards think all us Brits are standing in line waiting for food just for a laugh but their special so they can just go straight to the front. I always shout for them to get to the back so now my family refuse to be seen with me whilst getting food in any all inclusive buffet hall.

Haha good man! Your family are a bunch of deserters though.

I can't talk, I'm one of those bottlers who makes a sly comment under my breath whilst inwardly cursing my inability to make a scene!

[Motty]

Haha good man! Your family are a bunch of deserters though.

I can't talk, I'm one of those bottlers who makes a sly comment under my breath whilst inwardly cursing my inability to make a scene!

If I sometimes feel like I can't be arsed and let it go I'll make sure I make a bee line for them after to do a quick shoulder barge into them. I'm a bit pathetic like that but I just can't let things go ,ever

[Sir Harvest Fields]

Gas meter card. Missus keeps it in her bag and has fucked off to her xmas pissup and ive  no gas. No hot food and no heating. Why not leave the thing by the meter?

[Maggie May]

They don't do que's do they ,ignorant bastards think all us Brits are standing in line waiting for food just for a laugh but their special so they can just go straight to the front. I always shout for them to get to the back so now my family refuse to be seen with me whilst getting food in any all inclusive buffet hall.

Oh Craig.  I do the same.  Drives me utterly berserk.  In extreme circumstances of audacity I've been known to dash trays from people's hands to the ground and shout "See that its called a fucking queue.  And your place in it is behind me.  Kunt.  Bastard.  Wanker"  People don't want to be seen with me either.