Being offside isn't an offence. Trying to pass the ball to someone offside isn't an offence. Your second sentence is broadly why I don't like offside as it stands. It's pretty much the same situation as that penalty that Spurs got against us after Lovren tried to cut out the pass. I think Mo(?) scored a similar goal at some point too.
It's a shit law, but it is what it is.
Its a shite law, its inconsistently applied and for me goes completely against what the offside law should be about.
I read an interview with Arsene Wenger a few months back and he talks about the offside law and how they dont want to change it as its just about the only thing a defender has to defend against pace, particularly the pace of an Mbappe or a Haaland. This idea that teams can pass the ball towards an offside player and the defender makes a successful desperate attempt to intercept the pass should mean the flag still goes up and its up to the defending team if they want a restart or to carry on if theyve maintained the ball. What it shouldnt mean is the attacking side regain possession or anything like a turnover (defender clears for a throw in or corner or whatever) stands, it should be pulled back for offside.
The third man run offsides should also be looked at. We scored one like it at the Emirates last season. Darwin runs, hes off, Diaz does the extra run from deep, hes onside, Diaz rolls the ball across to Darwin to score. It was clever from us but the laws are daft. How hard can it be: is an offside player being targeted for a pass? Hes offside, simple.