Ah well, what a shit few days we've had.
Monday night Joanne came home from a weekend in London with her sister, I even treated them both to tea at the Ritz last Sat night. Noticed staright away she didn't look right. She had a liver biopsy the Monday before she went to London but seemed OK before she went on the Friday. Anyway, her stomach was sore and I told her to ring the Lilac Centre in the morning , which she did, who told her to ring her GP and they would get in touch with the oncologist. She rang the GP and wasn't surprised thye couldn't get her in that day even though she told them it was an emergency, they told ring back in the morning. I suggested I take her to A&E but she said she would to see the GP following day.
Following day she rang first thing and after being told she couldn't see the GP again she had a bit of a barney with them and finally got an appointment. GP told her it was probably trapped wind , gave her some antibiotics for a week and told her to comeback if she was no better.
Later that night (Weds) I went to bed at 11pm, she went up early as her stomach was still sore and she said will I take her to A&E first thing in the morning, no I said, we're going now.
Off to A&E at Whiston and got there around midnight, she was seen straight away, had a blood test, heart scan and saw the doc who gave her an examination and she was also given some morphine to ease the pain and then went for an X Ray. Blood tests came back and they were bad, very bad (were fine on the 28th) and it seems her kidneys had give in, X Ray and heart scan seemed OK. Unsure as to what was going on really but they said they would try to get as much fluid in as possible. She was given a bed on a ward and I left at 7:00am Thurs morn when she was stable, pain had been relieved somewhat but she had started to become dizzy, confused. I was told by the doc at the time that this was likely a build up of calcium affecting her brain.
Went back Thurs afternoon at 3:00pm, her face was jaundiced as were her eyes. She was very confused, a lot like the symptons of Alzeimers, OK one minute then the next, completely out of it, no awareness of where she was etc. Didn't see a doc all day but she had a CT scan later on that afternoon and they were still assessing her, just making sure she was comfortable and taking in lots of fluids. Left her at 8:40pm and she was still as confused as when I arrived.
Went in this afternoon at 1:00pm, still no change from what I could see and as you can imagine, getting quite worried about her state. Still very week, hardly eating any solids and I had to spoon feed her some jelly and ice cream. Was told when I got there that the doc wanted a word with me and managed to see a doc about 4:30pm just after she had been moved to another ward. Doc took me into an office and went through what was going on as I was still in the dark to what exactly was wrong, just working on assumptions at the time. Said it looks like the liver biopsy had caused an infection which had caused her kidneys to fail for one reason or another. CT Scan came back good, so there was no tumour in her brain which was good news and she had improved very slightly, according to the blood tests, from Thursday. The doc also said that she needs to improve a lot and even said if it came to it, because of her standing condition (palliative care) they wouldn't resuscitate her if it came to that. She didn't say her condition would lead to that, but they weren't sure and couldn't guarantee she would get better and had to make me aware of that possibility. That really told me she was really as bad as she looked and although it was always in the back of my mind that this day will come one day, hearing a doc say that to you really does affect you. I had to go back then and finish feeding her ice cream, christ, that was hard.
A few minutes later Joanne's oncologist and breast care nurse came to see us and told us pretty much what the doc told me but obviously not as blunt to Joanne, we had a bit of a cry and a hug. The breast care nurse also told us she would try and get Joanne into a cubicle tomorrow. When I left at just after 7:00pm, Jo was tired and nodded off so I hope she has a good sleep and gets better. What's worse, visiting at the moment on the ward is only 3-4 and 6-7 and that's only 2 hrs a day I can see Jo, so hopefully I can have a word with one of the nurses so I can spend more time with her.
I'm absolutely gutted at the moment, can't sleep and certainly can't stop thinking about her, just can't abide her being on her own and so confused, just want to hug her and tell her it'll be alright.
