As with many of these fights, the outcome rests on one character's fate and this one is no different in that regard, team fucking appalled (TFA) need to keep Constantine alive. The other character's on his team have their strengths, particularly Thanos, but only John Constantine has the ability to win this for him, especially against a team of such mystic heavyweights. The difference in this fight compared to others, is that keeping Constantine alive doesn't assure victory, but brings about a chance.
Without Constantine escaping at the beginning of the battle, the chances for his side dwindle towards zero.
Thanos is strong but has weaknesses in dealing with sorcery and magic, without the gauntlet. His ego can be used against him, as could his love of Death (imagine Bugs Bunny dressing him as death as a distraction leading Thanos into a trap). Out of my side it is fair to say all but Raiden could defeat Thanos single-handedly.
Cloud Strife has low level magic and good swordsmanship but can't compete with those on my side. Raiden would be able to handle him in his Metal Gear Rising, God of Thunder like form.
Optimus prime is great in physical combat but no match for Godly or mystical powers.
David Brent is David Brent.
The Milano is not a particularly special ship, just fast but is easily taken out and has to be replaced in canon.
At his default starting level, Constantine is just human, a very smart, incredible conman who knows a good deal of street level magic, but a human. His major power come for a limited time from particular sources that give him powers in the dark arts, they're not part of his character but accessed on occasion and even these fall well below the capability of Doctor Strange. The trick comes with his masterful manipulation and conmanship. He must access these power sources, return to the battlefield and convince those in battle that his powers are far beyond what he actually possesses in order to manipulate them into a deal, lead them into a trap or something along these lines.
The first question for this scenario is just how Constantine can get away. Well that can be achieved easily since he is often portrayed as being protected by the devil, and also knowing all routes out of heaven and hell. This however only applies to the DC universe. If he falls into another dimension (which could be achieved by Doctor Strange, the Genie or Bugs Bunny). So he needs to stay in or get to the DC universe (as the battle could easily start outside the DC universe). If he starts outside then he has no chance as nobody in their team can traverse universes or dimensions. If he is within then he needs to last long enough to get away from the three characters mentioned range, and stay away long enough.
Doctor Strange person to target him and he'll need to be delayed in order to prevent him pulling Constantine into another dimension. This raises another issue as in order to distract him, you're going to need to use significant enough ranged weapons for long enough to prevent Constantine being able to make an escape in the Milano, although even then the Tardis could make sure everyone is on the Milano to take away that escape.
If he managed to get away within the DC universe, find power sources and return, then convince my side of a power beyond their own joint capabilities, beyond even an attempted challenge, or trick them into a trap capable of defeating them, likely involving hell and the dead, then they can win. That is a lot of ifs, buts and maybes to secure a potential win.
Basically I win in 999 out of 1000 cases, and that's even without considering the Genie's full power.
To ensure victory (without any Genie), my team enter the TARDIS as Shazam blocks long range efforts from Optimus and Cloud. They land on the Milano, around John Constantine, trapping him there. Doctor Strange pulls him into another dimension with Raiden in tow, who decapitates him. Shazam flies out the door kills David Brent, Optimus Prime and Cloud Strife in a split second, leaving Thanos. Shazam can take him alone, but instead Bugs draws him into a trap dressed as mistress Death. Doctor Strange torments him through a few dimensions, sending him mad, Shazam punts him into the sun. They then take the TARDIS outside the milano, whilst Bugs runs round the Milano, setting up TNT everywhere, before blowing it sky high, as they all walk off together with shades on not looking as the fire balls goes up, signalling complete victory.
The Genie sits by in a deck chair with a margherita shouting bravo, bravo, encore at the end. Didn't even have to lift a finger.
If Genie is involved. He clicks his fingers and none of the opposition were ever born.
Poll