A small, not entirely serious, thought experiment.
I am FSG.
Gee, that Premier league thing looks pretty cool, and there’s lots of Americans already over there, so they must see a money-making deal.
What’s that you say, that Liverpool team seems to be in a bit of bother. The boosters are campaigning, organising and want a change. Weeks from Chapter 11, but one of the best supported teams on the planet. Say, lets check this one out. Liverpool mmm.. didn’t the Beatles come from there?
Put in a low-ball offer and see if we get lucky…. Well shit, guess what, we won.
Well the natives seem happy so that’s good. Manager seems a bit odd – he needs a good PR advisor and speech therapy. We’ll given him a go, as we know diddly-squat about soccer, plus the press and the local boys on the roster seem to like him.
Whats that? Losing games against state sides. Empty seats in the stands. Merchandising income down, and the fans don’t like him. Get rid of the coach and replace him with that wee guy I keep seeing around the place – the fans seem to like him, and it’ll get us through till the end of the season.
Bit worried about these fans. They seem to think they should have a say in the running of my club. WTF is that all about. Need to get this sorted out ASAP.
Well shit, the wee man did OK for an old guy. Hey wee man, way to go!! I’d like to bring in someone new young, cheaper and break that connection with the fans, but now’s not the right time. Lets give the wee guy a longer contract and see if he can get us into that Eurovision Football thing.
Well shit, that didn’t go too good. Won one of them small cups but didn’t get near the Eurovision thing. That’s $+30m per year down the tubes, but the fans still wanna keep the wee dude. No way man.
Lets put in place that system we have at the Sox, Coach, Team Manager and General Manager. It works here so its bound to work over there. Now we need some young coaches we can get this show back on the road.
Who do the press like? Well there’s this Martinez guy who seems clean-cut and keen, and the Rodgers guy from that welshland team.
Whats that? The fans like this Benitez dude. Great coach, past winner of the Eurovision thing and guarantees membership every year. That guy on the staff we inherited from the Texan redneck says he has bad table manners, is mouthy and what’s worse, the fans want him. WTF!! If those fans think they fuckin’ run this club they can think again. We’ll show them who’s boss this time.
Had a nice coffee with that Martinez guy. He’s good but what’s the deal with his boss. Jeez he tells the press when he’s going for a shit. Guess it’s the Rodgers boy then. Funny, I never knew Northern Ireland was in Welshland.
Oh fuck, he doesn’t want a Team Manager. Well we’ll go with him for now and put someone into position in a while with a different title.
He wants how much for new players!! Fuck. We’ll give him some of that, but if he doesn’t get 4th place and that Eurovision thing his ass is grass.
At least we’ve put them fans in their place. History and tradition is all well and good but it’s our club now. Just buy the tickets and merchandise and leave the running of the franchise to us.