Carroll was a ludicrous signing, because even if he'd cleaned up and kept fit, a Big Lad like that is only suitable to be a Plan B for a top-4 club.
PS if you disagree, you have to take Benteke back.
In hindsight it was a bit of an odd signing for a club like ours..
But when you view the signing in the context of the spin below, it seemed like a master-stroke at the time:
Carroll was bought because he was a dominant striker in form, banging in headers for fun.
We also bought his supply line in Downing and Henderson who would ensure he continued to bang those headers in for fun.
Aaand to top it all off, we also bought a cheeky, little striker called Luis Suarez who would profit from the big man's knock downs and flick-ons.
Oh yeah, and we also had deadball specialist Charlie Adam to further increase the opportunities for Carroll to be supplied with decent balls to bang in for fun.
What's there not to like?
Sounded like a plan.