Topic: Christmas Carol For Roy Hodgson

[Zappa]

We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.
Good tidings we’ll sing if your hook you sling
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.

Oh, please sack the southern pudding;
Oh, please sack the southern pudding; ;
Oh, please sack the southern pudding; and we’ll buy you some beer
We won't go until he’s kicked out;
We won't go until he’s kicked out;
We won't go until he’s kicked out; so do it right here
;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.

[GorstStreetBoy]

 

We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.
Good tidings we’ll sing if your hook you sling
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.

Oh, please sack the southern pudding;
Oh, please sack the southern pudding; ;
Oh, please sack the southern pudding; and we’ll buy you some beer
We won't go until he’s kicked out;
We won't go until he’s kicked out;
We won't go until he’s kicked out; so do it right here
;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.

Simple is always best

[Barnes10]

Joy to the world, Roy is gone!
Let anfield welcome the King;
Let every heart prepare His return,
And Heaven and kopites sing,
And Heaven and kopites sing,
And Heaven, and Heaven, and kopites sing.

[Hymer Red]

We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.
Good tidings we’ll sing if your hook you sling
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.

Oh, please sack the southern pudding;
Oh, please sack the southern pudding; ;
Oh, please sack the southern pudding; and we’ll buy you some beer
We won't go until he’s kicked out;
We won't go until he’s kicked out;
We won't go until he’s kicked out; so do it right here
;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;
We wish you are gone by Christmas;and a New Manager.

Good tidings we’ll sing if your hook you sling

One more tonight

Good King Kenny last looked out
And saw our league position
He would have to go and shout
Cos Roy wouldn't listen
Roys been doing this for years
He isnt going to change
Its all gonna end in tears
Roy is fuckin strange

Roy stood there and stroked his chin
But couldn't see 'owt missing
With Spearing and now Lucas in
His arse they should be kissing
Suddenly it went tits up
And we got beat on pens
Dumped out of the Carling Cup
Roys quickly losing friends

[Gifted Right Foot]

hahahaha loving this thread 

[Phil M]

George Michael - " (Roy's) Last Christmas"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1DfdED1SWX8

Last Christmas we never thought,
There would come a day, they'd send Rafa away,
This year, with relegation fears,
We're gonna need someone as special

Last Christmas we never thought,
There would come a day, they'd send Rafa away,
This year, with relegation fears,
We're gonna need someone as special (special, special)

Used by the yanks, left high and dry
Liverpool in turmoil, it would make you cry,
Now Roy Hodgson, is the boss at LFC,
Well, we're in thirteenth, it doesn't surprise me!

A happy christmas? If John Henry can send it,
A note saying thanks Roy but your time has ended,
Now we know what a fool you've been,
It's taken us a while but we're American,

Last Christmas...we never thought....(2x)

(Ohhh ---Ohh Ohh Baby)

Losing to Blackpool, scrapping with Allardyce,
Early cup exit, with no easy league ties,
Roy, we thought you were, someone to rely on,
They told us the big names needed your shoulder to cry on,
But faced with the media, you pour out your heart,
Telling the players that they must play their part,

Ooh, Ooh, Now we've found a new owner,
you can go somewhere else.

Last summer, you were given the start,
But there's a problem with the way, you want us to play,
Next year, to allay all our fears,
Please make way for someone special, special.

(chorus)

[eviled]

You knobs have me in tears and stitches.

[Finn Solomon]

Benitez?

Dear God you're sad.

to the rest of you lads and lasses. Brilliant thread.

[Ramon]

Brilliantly done mate.  Take a bow.

[FowlerLeftFoot]

Santa Roy Is Coming To Town

Oh! You better watch out,
You better not cry,
You better not pout,
I'm telling you why:
Santa Roy is coming to town!

He's making a list,
Checking it twice,
Gonna make sure Poulsen is starting each time,
Santa Roy is coming to town!

His teams are easy pickings,
Especially when playing away,
He is giving 3 points on a plate,
And he thanks you for a game well played.

Oh! You better watch out,
You better not cry,
You better not pout,
I'm telling you why:
Santa Roy is coming to town!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWv72L4wgCc - sing along

Our oppositions' fans would love this when we go over to their ground to play...

[Buzz Killington]

Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way,

Oh what fun it is to see Hodgson win away,

Hey!.....

One the first day of Christmas
Roy Hodgson said to me
£5 million for Konchesky

On the second day of Christmas
Hodgson sent to me
Chaaaaaaarlie Adam
and £5m for Konchesky

On the third day of Christmas
Hodgson sent to me
One unfit Glen
Chaaaaaaarlie Adam
and £5m for Konchesky


Will continue it later

[StevenLFC]

We are falling
Down the table
When we're playing
We always lose
In our next season
We'll be away at Leeds United
Thanks Roy Hodgson, you've ballsed us up.

We're gunna have nightmares tonight
Battling West Ham and Stoke
In a relegation fight.

Rubbish signings
All around us
Paul Koncheskey
At left back
Christian Poulsen
Is really rather useless
Thanks Roy Hodgson, you've ballsed us up.

[rouge nell]

Tune: little drummer boy

Go they told him
Ba rump Ba bum bum
Your not welcome here
Ba rump ba bum bum
Your driving us to beer
Ba rump Ba bum bum
Your hairdo's a bit queer
Ba rump Ba bum bum rump a bum bum rump a bum bum

[FowlerLeftFoot]

 

Tune: little drummer boy

Go they told him
Ba rump Ba bum bum
Your not welcome here
Ba rump ba bum bum
Your driving us to beer
Ba rump Ba bum bum
Your hairdo's a bit queer
Ba rump Ba bum bum rump a bum bum rump a bum bum

[GorstStreetBoy]

Hoofs are falling, all around me,
Poulsen playing, Having fun!
Its the season... to lower expectation,
Merry Christmas, Everyone.

Roy is planning, some Janury spending,
And Zamora is on his list
T'is the season... for fighting relegation!
Merry Christmas, Everyone.

Der, der ,derder...

We're gonna have - a party tonight!
We'll change some Christmas songs to tell Roy why hes shite...

[Lofty Ambitions]

"The Best Fans in the World" - also when it comes to Christmas carols! 

[Xabinator]

To the tune of The First Noel


I have No help, Fernando did say
After Goodison Park where Four-Five-One we played
That's not...how we play, Bill Shankly would weep
But you know what, old 'Hodgo', you've sewn, now you'll reap.
No help, No help, No help, No help
Bring back our true leader, Rafael!


Go easy.....just a few thoughts I threw together 

[Lolo]

Tune :-While Shepherds Washed Their Socks At Night

While Kopites watched their team last night
All sat behind the goal
An Angel of Fowlers came down
And put Roy on the dole

Oh thanks to thee the Kopites sang
it sure was getting dire
With Roy in charge it was so dull
and we were in the mire

Fear not said he a King shall come
And he will sort it out
The team position will improve
Of that there is no doubt

He'll stay until the seasons end
And then his job is done
A place in next years champions league
Is what he will have won

Hope the mods dont lock this thread, it could be fun

        Guys.....you are ALL absolutely brilliant. Funniest thing on here for a LONG time.  ........

and that verse above gets my vote. Pure genius......I take my hat off to you!

[Chivasino]

What an epic thread! Well in all.

Me and my mate at work are pissing ourselves, and he's not even a red.

[DJM]

Good King Kenny last looked out
Wondering why Steven
Was prone to stand about and pout
Although the match was even

Shitely played the team that night
Like they had all season
Then a poor Hodge came in sight
For shiteness he's the re-ea-ason

[rouge nell]

Tune: band aid
 It's transfer time
Roy,there's no need to be afraid
At transfer time
Get rid of the shite coz your getting well paid
And in our season that's empty you can spread a smile of joy(post derby)
Throw your hugs around El niño  for fucks sake Roy
But say a prayer pray for the younger ones
At transfer time it's hard
But with the cash it's lots of fun
There's a star out there who's lonely
Waiting for the ball
Give support up to nando for fucks sake Roy 

Help fernando
Let him know he's not alone
Help fernando
Let him know he's not alone

[Andichrist]

Jingle Bells, Hodgson smells,
PFK is crap
Nando’s good, but he gets screwed
By Hodgson’s shitty tact-
ics!
Jingle bells, Hodgson sells
Kuyt and Reina, too
Agger, he will get the boot
Cause he refused to hoof

Crashing down the league
With just one man on top
Allardyce and Bruce -
laughing till they drop (shock! horror!)
But hope is still in sight
Cause Henry is astute
He’ll kick out Hodge tonight
And get in someone good

Kopites sing, the future’ll bring
Good times back once more
And every season we will beat
The mancs away by four
Kopites sing, not since The King
Has Anfield seen such play
We’ll seal the league in early march
At Everton away

[Buzz Killington]

Jingle Bells, Hodgson smells,
PFK is crap
Nando’s good, but he gets screwed
By Hodgson’s shitty tact-
ics!
Jingle bells, Hodgson sells
Kuyt and Reina, too
Agger, he will get the boot
Cause he refused to hoof

Crashing down the league
With just one man on top
Allardyce and Bruce -
laughing till they drop (shock! horror!)
But hope is still in sight
Cause Henry is astute
He’ll kick out Hodge tonight
And get in someone good

Kopites sing, the future’ll bring
Good times back once more
And every season we will beat
The mancs away by four
Kopites sing, not since The King
Has Anfield seen such play
We’ll seal the league in early march
At Everton away

Genius mate 

[dane]

To the tune of 'Santa Claus is Coming to Town'

You better not scout
You better not try
Just get the fuck out
I'm telling you why
Roy Hodgson is taking us down
He's making a list
And checking it twice
Gonna buy cast-offs from Sam Allardyce
Roy Hodgson is taking us down

He sees you pass in training
You keep it on the floor
But that shit don't work round here now
So you're in the team no more

[GorstStreetBoy]

Love this thread... In my minds eye I keep picturing Roy reading it, going fucking apeshit! 

[The Flying Pig]

To the tune of Good King Wenceslas.

Good King Hodgson,he looked out
Six games in the season
Surprised he was when he found out
We were in the bottom three then.

He sorely racked his brains that night
Searching for a reason
Then it came,clear in sight
Blame it on Benitez.

He triumphed next at Woodison
Away now to the bitters
He claimed that we'd outplayed them there
To everybody's titters.

So he carried blithely on
The players they protested
They played the next game how they'd want
And Blackburn were then bested.

A new man now he came in sight
To sort our transfer system
Secretly Our Good King cursed
And swore that he'd resist him.

Coat already collected!

[bravoco]

Outstanding thread. Feeling well festive now. Well done all!

[Chivasino]

Free our squad  – Does he know Liverpool Football Club

Daniel Agger:
It's Christmas time, there's no need to be afraid
Just play me and the memory of hopeless hoofs will fade

Fernando Torres:
I can make them bounce and spread a smile of joy
Throw your arms around Fernando at Christmas time

Kopites:
But we all say a prayer, Pray for the mighty ones
At Christmas time it's hard, and we aren’t exactly having fun

Paul Tomkins:
Roy, there's a world outside your window
Chelsea at home and we’re full dread and fear

Lucas Leiva:
Paul, you forgot to mention Rafa

Paul Tomkins:
Just before the chorus, I’ll mention him there

Pepe Reina:
And the Christmas bells that ring there are the clanging chimes of regret

Henry Winter:
He’s got 35 years of experience, how dare you forget

Jamie and Stevie:
And there won't be no joy around Anfield this Christmas time
The greatest gift we lost, it was our crime

Fat Scouser:
In press conferences he crows
Small time, he has to go

Kopites
Does he know Liverpool Football Club at all?

Dirk Kuyt:
”He will never beat you boss”
I’ve just texted Rafa

RAWKites:
Spare a thought this yuletide for us
It’s the only time RAWK’s been together

Fernando Torres:
Please listen John Henry
I’m losing the passion within me

Paul Tomkins:
Remember Rafa he was so selfless
Now we have Roy who’s completely hopeless

Kopites:
Does he know Liverpool Football club at all?

Leave our club

Let us know it's Christmas time

 Leave our club

Let us know it's Christmas time

And so on….

[Lecter]

Nicked from elsewhere

We're beginning to look a lot like Blackburn
No more passing on the floor
And the prettiest thing you'll see is our midfield three plus three
Just in front of our back four

[Dmode101]

Amazing Hoof, How sweet the sound
to a shitehouse gaffe like roy
The ball is lost, torres dumbfound,
He's blind, but we all see.

T'was Hoof that taught my heart to fear.
And Hoof, my pee relieved.
How precious did a pass appear
The hour when roy was sacked.

[The Fletcher Memorial]

Haha qwality thread. 

My sad effort. To the tune of:  Stop The Cavalry; Jona Lewie


Hodgson is nob he’s got Rafa’s job, dont know a thing about where he is
Oh the things he’s says can’t he go away, can’t you see he’s depressing me
I cry every night, I say it’s not right, can you help us King Kenny

Nando isn’t right, he is playing shite, Hodgson bends over for whiskey nose
That was when I said, put this thing to bed, can you help us King Kenny

While our Rafa waits at home
In his Inter fall out zone
Wish I could be singing now
Cheering the gafa that I love

Hodgson is a dumb bum
Dumb a dumb a bum
Dumb a dumb bum dumb a bum
Dumb a dumb a bum

Wishing Rafa home, for christmas

[Millie]

To the Tune "Mistletoe and Wine"

El Nino is King, the Kopites sing
Roy is passed, we want a new beginning
Dreams of Rafa, dreams of Pelligrino (sp)
We are all numb, Roy must go

Christmas time, we are not doing fine
Kopites singing - please Henry give us a sign
our play is so dire, it gets worse every week
its time for Roys sacking - it is so plain to see

[Lofty Ambitions]

This must be the greatest thread ever 

Here's mine:

(Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer)

Hodgie, the red-nosed gaffer
had a very shiny CV.
And if you ever saw the CV,
you would even say it glows.

All of the fans and Kopites
just laugh and call him names.
They would never let poor Hodgie
coach in any of their teams

Then one foggy Midnight Eve
Hicksie came and said:
"Hodgie with your CV so bright,
won't you guide my team tonight?"

And all the pundits just love him
as they shout out with glee,
LFC, you greatest ever team,
Here's to you and your history!

Now I am all depressed again 

Maybe someone can make a brighter version of this?

[CHOPPER]

Phil, yours and Barnes10's one about Benitez are the best by a mile.

It's just that no body liked to say as you know what you get like with a multitude of praise.

[NineTails20]

I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus

I saw Woyston bugger Liverpool
Underneath the rest of them this year.
He’s a smarmy little creep
And his tactics aren’t too deep
He’s doing SAF a favour
And he makes me want to weep

Us and  Woyston in the Championship
He’ll take  us back to where old Shanks began
And the papers all agree
He’s a nice decent chappie
But he’s buggering Liverpool FC

Fucking brilliant!   

[FowlerLeftFoot]

   its not your fault, its George's


Seriously, it is awesome 

No one liked mine   

[NineTails20]

Bastards, now I can't get 'It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Fulham' out of my head........ *walks off singing*

[electricghost]

Fowler rest ye merry RAWKite men
Let nothing you dismay
Remember, Rafael, our saviour
Will return one day
To save us from all Roy's crap
With tactics gone astray
O tidings of comfort and joy
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

From Juve, in Italy
The midfield man was bought
He doesn't move very much
And passes without thought
But hopefully Meireles
Will be the one to sort
O tidings of comfort and joy
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

We had a good young left back
But he has gone on loan
So Roy scratched his chin again
And got Fulham on the phone
Please, Fowler, Aurelio
Is no longer injury prone
O tidings of comfort and joy
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

We need a forward in January
To help Nando find the goal
But Roy will end up buying
Fucking Carlton Cole
But maybe he will try
That young Pacheco in the hole
O tidings of comfort and joy
Comfort and joy
O tidings of comfort and joy

[Dixon_Cox]

Jingle Bells, Hodgson smells...

...of piss.

---deadly silence---

[BrettD]

Great thread!