You missed Fat Scouser, he's Mayor of Bournemouth.
I gave it up for Lent, John. I'm now officially a Freeman of the World. Born in Candia Street, just off Neddy Rd, left to go to Kirkby in the slum clearances, have walked the earth, never leaving a trace, ever since. The pay's lousy but the hours are good. Spent a good few years in Kirkby, was last up there last summer, still got some great mates there. But life expectancy is lower than Gaza Strip, so they are thinning out fast and I'm due a visit.
Macca, was her name BinLid? She used to wank everyone and their dogs. Or there was Fat Sandra. She used to ride the buses all day, standing next to the drivers and nosh them off at the terminus on Towerhill. Ahh, Kirkby, I miss it. Fucking great place, boss people, done nothing but laugh there.