Klopp quotes..
On rumours Mats Hummels could join Manchester United
"If that's not a b------t story, I'll eat a broomstick."
Again on Hummels, this time when he was out injured
"We will wait for him like a good wife waiting for her husband who is in jail"
On having a hair transplant
"Yes, it’s true. I underwent a hair transplant. And I think the results are really cool, don’t you?"
On potentially being a TV presenter
"I’d have maybe presented some kind of afternoon programme where people aren’t all that interested in what you’re saying, and you just stare ahead"
During a fixture congestion
"It’s as if someone has to play the world chess championship after 72 hours of sleep deprivation."
Comparing his style to Arsene Wenger's
"He likes having the ball, playing football, passes. It’s like an orchestra. But it’s a silent song. I like heavy metal.”
On playing in the Champions League final
"It was great, the weather was good, everything is okay, only the result is so s---t that I cannot.... All the other things were great."
On singing
"I couldn’t have been a rock star, although I do sing Country Road very loudly on the PlayStation karaoke game."
Talking to the British press.
"You don't understand? You should learn. There are some really good German explanations for some problems. But I don't know how to say it in English."
After a poor run of form to end 2014
"The best news today is that football is over for 2014, any criticism that we receive now is justified. We are standing here like complete idiots and it's completely our own fault."
On trying to outdo Bayern Munich in the transfer market
"We have bows and arrows. And when we aim precisely, we can hit the target. It's only that Bayern have a bazooka. The probability that they will hit the target is clearly higher. But then Robin Hood was apparently quite successful."
On losing Mario Gotze to Bayern
"Gotze has gone because he is Guardiola's personal chosen signing and he wants to play with Guardiola, in his style. I can't make myself 15cm shorter or start speaking Spanish"
On winning at Bayern Munich
"When Borussia Dortmund last won here 19 years ago, most of my players were still being breastfed"
On whether the night of the 2012 German Cup final—when they beat Bayern Munich 5-2—could have been any better?
"It could have been a bit warmer"
On having to give interviews after a defeat
"During the first interview, I was very disappointed. During the second one I already felt a bit better. If I wait half an hour, I’ll probably have the feeling that we won."
On creating a philosophy at the club when he took the job in 2008
"The fans should not only recognise us by our black and yellow jerseys. Even if we play in red, everyone in the stadium should think, ‘Whoa, that can only be BVB’.”
