Topic: Garth Crooks

[wardides]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cugYQ35vtvQ

In the words of Eamon Dunphy...."Thats the first time ive seen sex between two men on the BBC"

[Des Lynam]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJP7b60h2ck

[safhossain03]

'If you're white, and you're from Connecticut, and you try that nonsense... they'll kill you'.

[rushyman]

I like Crooks.
Bit tedious and hard to listen too but he is miles ahead of most in terms of punditry.

What the fuck

[Bob Loblaw]

I think he's funny. Certainly wouldn't be able to get myself worked up over him like some of you lot are. He's fucking harmless.

[Terry de Niro]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cugYQ35vtvQ

In the words of Eamon Dunphy...."Thats the first time ive seen sex between two men on the BBC"

As much as I think Garth Crooks is a prick, I'm fucked if I'm ever going to think that Eamon Dunphy talks anything other than absolute bollocks.

[Strummer77]

Lat season when Rafa was under-pressure/in crisis/going to quit (the media make it an annual event regardless of facts), Garth was on Football Focus. There was a decent discussion going on, between Dixon and Lawrenson- I think- and he interrupts. He  proudly proclaims "I think he's got one eye on the Real Madrid job, you know!" before pointing around like a twat and grinning like the smug Charlie Uniform November Tango he is.

Everyone ignored him with Dixon looking at him in bemusement before Garth shouts "did you lot not here what I said?" and laughing loudly as if it had been prfound and not the 100% bullshit that it was. Dixon sighed "yes I did Garth" and carried on what he was saying previously ignoring Crooks's point. Was so cringeworthy and showed even the other pundits think he's utter cack.

Worst pundit ever.

[Santiago]

Lat season when Rafa was under-pressure/in crisis/going to quit (the media make it an annual event regardless of facts), Garth was on Football Focus. There was a decent discussion going on, between Dixon and Lawrenson- I think- and he interrupts. He  proudly proclaims "I think he's got one eye on the Real Madrid job, you know!" before pointing around like a twat and grinning like the smug Charlie Uniform November Tango he is.

Everyone ignored him with Dixon looking at him in bemusement before Garth shouts "did you lot not here what I said?" and laughing loudly as if it had been prfound and not the 100% bullshit that it was. Dixon sighed "yes I did Garth" and carried on what he was saying previously ignoring Crooks's point. Was so cringeworthy and showed even the other pundits think he's utter cack.

Garth Crooks is a fuckin' genius and well worth his wages for the comedy value alone.

[Lush is the best medicine...]

Lat season when Rafa was under-pressure/in crisis/going to quit (the media make it an annual event regardless of facts), Garth was on Football Focus. There was a decent discussion going on, between Dixon and Lawrenson- I think- and he interrupts. He  proudly proclaims "I think he's got one eye on the Real Madrid job, you know!" before pointing around like a twat and grinning like the smug Charlie Uniform November Tango he is.

that pointing shit he does really fucks me off, its like he's trying to make himself look intelligent!!!

[ollick]

Was never much of a country and western fan.

[AndrewLFC_1971]

Catface

[Lush is the best medicine...]

someone's mentioned mark bright - he's on the times podcast, fuck knows how he has actually been able to be a pundit for so long, probably because he has such a lovely voice

[N-Red]

This thread is screaming for a Garth Crooks/ Mole photoshop picture.

[oldboybailey]

Remember Garth at a press conference before some big international tournament a few years ago. Everyone was asking the england manager and players (cant remember who it was) about their hopes for the tournament, how the mood in the camo was etc. Then Garth comes out with a totally random question about some minor issue about preperation or the hotel. The answer got brushed over and he just kept asking the same thign over and over again as if he'd discovered some massive issue. You could tell by the way he was speaking that he thought he was the bollocks for being the only one to consider the problem when everyone else in the room jsut wanted him to fuck off and be quiet.

thats whats so annoying about him. He thinks he's this enlightened footbll oracle and that everyone should crowd round and listen whenever he deigns to offer us his wisdom. In reality he's just a self imporant, self obsessed no mark turd tickler.

[vicgill]

Agree. I watched one of our games last season on sopcast, with Mark Bright commentating. After enduring him for 90 minutes, I had to take 2 paracetemol and lie down in a dark room for 2 hours. It took until the following wednesday before I started feeling normal again. 90 minutes of Mark Bright would skull fuck any man on this planet.

As for Garth Crooks, he needs to be put out of his misery with a taser gun. He can wave his fucking arms all he likes when he's on the ground having a fit & choking on his tongue, the odious little cretin.

Agree totally, he does the same to me (Mark Bright) and the least said about Crooks the better.

[finchy1972]

I like the way he pauses  mid sentence or before starting another sentence,  as if he's going to come out with something deep and meaningful when actually i think its just that he cant engage his brain.

[barnowl123]

From James Lawton of The Independent:

Dixon on the ball as a TV pundit

Lee Dixon did nothing to damage the sense that he is emerging as arguably television's sharpest football analyst when he imposed a little insight on the execrable Merseyside derby.

While his co-panellist Garth Crooks supported amiably the popular view that rather than a game played in the most shocking and cynical way, and one which could easily have resulted in not two but half-a-dozen red cards, it was exactly the kind which the fans loved to see, Dixon kept a poker face. Then he said, "Not one pass found the right shirt – but he liked the match."

Dixon, like the trenchant Graeme Souness, is a rare and refreshing presence. He gives the impression that when he goes into the studio he does so not to milk his celebrity but to offer a hard-earned opinion. Talking heads are 10-a-penny. Thinking ones, these days, must be weighed in gold.

someone's mentioned mark bright - he's on the times podcast, fuck knows how he has actually been able to be a pundit for so long, probably because he has such a lovely voice

Listened to this weeks podcast on the way to work this morning. Stuart Barnes (who knows fuck all about the game) came across so much better than him.

[Trotterwatch]

Mark Bright, what a complete fucker, can't stand him.  Not a fan of Crooks either.  Funnily enough from what I've seen of him, Keown seems to be one of the better pundits.

[Chivasino]

I have no recollection of him as a player? What was he like?

[the good half]

I got slaughtered for saying I like Crooks!!

The beauty of RAWK - sorry lads.

[the good half]

I have no recollection of him as a player? What was he like?

He was good.
Played in a very good Spurs side.
Had Archibald and Hoodle around him so it was easy to be decent.

[Dr Cornwallis]

Catface

He's half cat, it's insane, it's special, it's Garth and he's literally shat down his leg as this picture is taken.  Men-sational.

[Mr Kipling]

Garth Crooks doesnt wind me up anymore as it seems as though the rest of the people on the panel now know that he talks shit. Constantly. Steve Claridge, however, really makes my shit itch when i see him on the tv. You can almost see him rockng on his chair like an excited 10 year old kid when it comes to spouting some nonsense about us. In fact you can tell the pundits who dont like us or Rafa as they reffer to him as Benitez, but seem to use first names with talking about the other managers

[Upanishad]

Found this old thread whilst digging about, apologies for reviving for no reason but some of it is truly hilarious!

As the op knows, laughter really is the best medicine!

[AndrewLFC_1971]

Crooks is a legend.

[Spanish Al]

Sat next to him at Liverpool vs Vittesse years ago. Was a fair few seats on row one (i was young a liked the first row ) in the main stand on his row, so sat next to him. Was a very nice fella.

[The Manhattan Project]

He has an odd shaped head.

[Lush is the best medicine...]

i've just seen this in his team of the week from monday:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/world_cup_2010/8738460.stm

ANTOLIN ALCARAZ (striker)
Paraguay

Great goal that left Group F wide open.

he's a centre half you fucking moron

[Hypias_noggin]

Total fucking idiotic legend haha! just been watching him getting irate because martin keown made a genuine comment/opinion about nigeria's organization after the game, and he just starts shouting over keown! Legend

[choi]

Hate him with a passion.

[Hazell]

Total fucking idiotic legend haha! just been watching him getting irate because martin keown made a genuine comment/opinion about nigeria's organization after the game, and he just starts shouting over keown! Legend

Yeah, Legend of the Mole-Faced Man.

[INABITSKI]

Hate him with a passion.

[Bangers N Masch]

i've just seen this in his team of the week from monday:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/world_cup_2010/8738460.stm

he's a centre half you fucking moron

His team of the weeks are probably the worst piece of journalism you'll ever see. Mark Bright's commentary is the worst you'll ever hear.

[exiledintheUSA]

I think Crooks is an Utterly Nice Tip-top fella.

[lfc_col]

Total fucking idiotic legend haha! just been watching him getting irate because martin keown made a genuine comment/opinion about nigeria's organization after the game, and he just starts shouting over keown! Legend

that sounds like it needs putting on youtube

[Red_Isle_Chap]

His team of the weeks are probably the worst piece of journalism you'll ever see. Mark Bright's commentary is the worst you'll ever hear.

Garth's after match "punditry" is easily the fucking worst. It's not entertaining, it's just utter fucking shit. My mum, who knows nothing about football, could put together a better after game sum up than him, and my pet rabbit could pick a better team of the week.

Fucking tool of the highest order.

[kinkytones]

Imagine him and Pleat during a game. Fucking hell

[choi]

Imagine him and Pleat Mark Bright during a game. Fucking hell

Unfortunately we got that at half time in the Holland/Cameroon game. Maybe at the start and end as well but when i saw those 2 i just switched over to the Denmark/Japan game.

[INABITSKI]

Imagine him and Pleat during a game. Fucking hell

I like Pleat. Leave the fuck alone!

Seriously, he has his faults but I would happily listen to him over 99% of others.

[Pires]

Crooks is a disgrace to the profession.