Topic: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!

[Dr. Beaker]

As for the immoral charlatan in number ten not sure why he is calling Corbyn chicken when all his chickens are coming home to roost very soon.

Best Wishes to you all:

And he will no doubt be appearing before the beak soon after so much fowl play, the cock.

[JohnnoWhite]

For the sake of ALL of our suffering people may it be so - and bloody soon!! Hate is a terrible word but as God is my witness, for what these abusive and supremely arrogant Tory bastards and their shadowy billionaire backers have deliberately inflicted on our people, I fucking hate ALL they stand for and ALL they ever will stand for.

[kopite.keith]

For the sake of ALL of our suffering people may it be so - and bloody soon!! Hate is a terrible word but as God is my witness, for what these abusive and supremely arrogant Tory bastards and their shadowy billionaire backers have deliberately inflicted on our people, I fucking hate ALL they stand for and ALL they ever will stand for.

1000% with you on that Jonno. If I said what I really feel, people would think I was a psychopath 😡

[Mutton Geoff]

For the sake of ALL of our suffering people may it be so - and bloody soon!! Hate is a terrible word but as God is my witness, for what these abusive and supremely arrogant Tory bastards and their shadowy billionaire backers have deliberately inflicted on our people, I fucking hate ALL they stand for and ALL they ever will stand for.

with you all the way i would add also these people who get too much airtime in the media like Oakshot, and the rest of the despicable "all mouth and opinion no morality or empathy" crowd.

[Mutton Geoff]

Bump

[Willi]

Well I'm there but extremely busy at the moment

[Mutton Geoff]

Well I'm there but extremely busy at the moment

For the last few months i have had to monitor my own BP and as i keep records of it, i have become aware that since i retired my BP is down around 10 points on average: I am still keeping myself busy but now going at my speed

[Willi]

I have noticed that, while I am extremely busy and occupied, things do take a lot longer to do.
2000 teabags arrived last week. Wonder how long they will last!!!!

[So... Howard Phillips]

I have noticed that, while I am extremely busy and occupied, things do take a lot longer to do.
2000 teabags arrived last week. Wonder how long they will last!!!!

Where they delivered by the Cutty Sark?

[The Gulleysucker]

So, two years on since this it's that time again...

They've changed it.

There's no longer the old smearing of the windows in the jobbie Advent calender.

Instead there's now a little stick thing with some grooves on the end that you scrape along your selected turd (caught using whatever method works for you) filling up the grooves, and then you pop it back into the plastic container and post it off.

[John C]

So, two years on since this it's that time again...

It's 55 rather than 60 in Liverpool Gulley. What's happening now? Is it another routine check mate?

[The Gulleysucker]

It's 55 rather than 60 in Liverpool Gulley. What's happening now? Is it another routine check mate?

Yeah, I did a post later in the thread about them lowering the age for these tests.

It makes sense, the earlier any symptoms are detected the better the possible outcomes for anyone with problems.

This is just the routine one, every two years.

I had read that they were going to be moving to a new blood test instead but it seems not quite yet, but this was still a lot easier than last time.

[Dr. Beaker]

So, two years on since this it's that time again...

They've changed it.

There's no longer the old smearing of the windows in the jobbie Advent calender.

Instead there's now a little stick thing with some grooves on the end that you scrape along your selected turd (caught using whatever method works for you) filling up the grooves, and then you pop it back into the plastic container and post it off.

Could I use one of those things you use for tiling because mine hasn't turned up yet?

[So... Howard Phillips]

Could I use one of those things you use for tiling because mine hasn't turned up yet?

Yes but don't confuse grout with a turd.

[robbed 1966 yorkies from kids' selection boxes]

So, two years on since this it's that time again...

They've changed it.

There's no longer the old smearing of the windows in the jobbie Advent calender.

Instead there's now a little stick thing with some grooves on the end that you scrape along your selected turd (caught using whatever method works for you) filling up the grooves, and then you pop it back into the plastic container and post it off.

Be a lot easier if we had the German style toilets

[So... Howard Phillips]

Be a lot easier if we had the German style toilets

I read once that they have the shelf so that health conscious Germans, after eating vast quantities of meat, can inspect their turds for worm infestation.

Or maybe I read it on the side of a bus with Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson gurning in front of it?

[The Gulleysucker]

Yes, the old Flachspüler

...Having these here would save all our catching heroics though I think the stench could prove problematic for more sensitive souls, especially after a night out and a curry which you normally want submerged under water asap and not to be sitting there steaming away while you are doing the crossword....

Psychoanalysis originated in Germany too...

[Willi]

After a night on the Guiness those toilets spray shrapnel all over the place. Speaking from experience here.

[robbed 1966 yorkies from kids' selection boxes]

I worked/lived in Berlin for a month about 17 years ago and I found they weren't deep enough some mornings, having to stand up mid flow to flush to avoid contact and asphyxiation

[Pheeny]

I lived in Germany for almost 5 years and we had one toilet like that and one "normal"  one,I was under strict orders from my missus on which toilet to use for what visit...

["Albie Home For Christmas!" (via the 92A bus)]

Haven't been on for ages, been looking after my mum whos just died but saw this and  thought of our mate Johnnowhite, about lpool United rivalry but how much we're so similar. Always known that and wanted to share it with John
 https://www.liverpoolfc.com/news/features/368796-watch-free-video-us-and-them-manchester-united

[Pheeny]

Haven't been on for ages, been looking after my mum whos just died

My thoughts are with you Albie.

[The Gulleysucker]

...been looking after my mum whos just died...

Albie, so sorry to hear of your Mum going.

I know from my own personal experience when my Mum went a few years ago that it's undoubtedly a bit of a tough time.

[only6times]

Condolenses to you.

[JohnnoWhite]

So, two years on since this it's that time again...

They've changed it.

There's no longer the old smearing of the windows in the jobbie Advent calender.

Instead there's now a little stick thing with some grooves on the end that you scrape along your selected turd (caught using whatever method works for you) filling up the grooves, and then you pop it back into the plastic container and post it off.

Just got mine - oh joy!!

[JohnnoWhite]

Haven't been on for ages, been looking after my mum whos just died but saw this and  thought of our mate Johnnowhite, about lpool United rivalry but how much we're so similar. Always known that and wanted to share it with John
 https://www.liverpoolfc.com/news/features/368796-watch-free-video-us-and-them-manchester-united

Aw Albie, saddened to hear of your mum's passing. May she rest in eternal peace lad.

Have already seen this mate and there's no question in my mind and in the minds of a great many older generation Manc Reds that historically, it's dead right. For us, it's for sure the yardstick in our English game. Long may it continue!!

[The Gulleysucker]

Just got mine - oh joy!!

Johnno, as I expect you'll find, not only is the sampling technique now easier, it appears to be a much faster turnaround now than last time.

I had my results within about 5 days of posting the sample off.

All appears to be currently well within the inner mysterious workings of my chutney bunker, though my wife may occasionally dispute that...

One thing I noticed in the small print was that these automatic biennial tests finish when you are 75, after that it seems you then have to request them yourself.

[JohnnoWhite]

So then, 14 months to go until I hit the 3/4 of a century Gulley mate.

[Mutton Geoff]

just seen this so sorry about your loss Albie

[kopite.keith]

Condolences to you Albie

[vicgill]

How about 76

[vicgill]

Hiya Johnno I am thinking of changing the story of my life from "I could have been a contender to "Shankly's Boy", what do you think?

[AndyMuller]

Anybody heard from Maggie May?

[JohnnoWhite]

Hiya Johnno I am thinking of changing the story of my life from "I could have been a contender to "Shankly's Boy", what do you think?

Alright Vic? If anyone in here has a better claim to that title change, they've kept their particular light well hidden under a bushel.

[Pheeny]

Anybody heard from Maggie May?

I hear from her sporadically on Facebook but not heard anything for a couple of weeks.

[JohnnoWhite]

This unique gem of a thread is in danger of disappearing up its own arse. Do we want to allow this to happen people? Very sad to witness its decline.

[kopite.keith]

This unique gem of a thread is in danger of disappearing up its own arse. Do we want to allow this to happen people? Very sad to witness its decline.

Well Jonno, I suppose the catalyst for one or two of the more entertaining stories, which led to pages of humour, have not been around lately. Fat Scouser and Maggie May spring to mind, I hope they amongst others are keeping as well as can be expected. Could also be that those June celebrations take a lot longer to recover from these days. 😉

[kesey]

I read once that they have the shelf so that health conscious Germans, after eating vast quantities of meat, can inspect their turds for worm infestation.

Or maybe I read it on the side of a bus with Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson gurning in front of it?

Let's be honest here it's the first thing we all do after a good shit. I think it's in Chinese Medicine were they study peoples shit to check their health. It makes perfect sense that to me. 

An old story me Grandad tells me is in when he was in the army in the 50's a young lad wanted a shit so was told to go to the bush over there when one of the other lads was hiding behind it with a shovel. The young lad turned around .... not sure if it's true or not but still funny.

[vivabobbycurmudgeongraham]

This unique gem of a thread is in danger of disappearing up its own arse. Do we want to allow this to happen people? Very sad to witness its decline.

You are right johnno. I am guilty of neglecting this thread. Just learned of Albies mums passing to which I pass on my belated  condolences to you Albie mate.

I have to return for a second viewing of the inner sanctum having had some polyps removed and analysed. There was some weird looking mass (I had a front row seat) they took a biopsy of and now want to dig it out so more moviprep and starvation in advance commences again a fortnight.

[JohnnoWhite]

You are right johnno. I am guilty of neglecting this thread. Just learned of Albies mums passing to which I pass on my belated  condolences to you Albie mate.

I have to return for a second viewing of the inner sanctum having had some polyps removed and analysed. There was some weird looking mass (I had a front row seat) they took a biopsy of and now want to dig it out so more moviprep and starvation in advance commences again a fortnight.

I wish the very best of outcomes for you Bobby lad.

Some of the youngsters need to come and show their faces in OUR thread because one day, THEY will inherit the history, the funny stories and the social and political history it contains. There are some absolute gems in it both poignant and funny and I commend it to you all.