Author Topic: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!  (Read 2954484 times)

Online Dr. Beaker

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42600 on: September 11, 2019, 10:54:49 AM »


As for the immoral charlatan in number ten not sure why he is calling Corbyn chicken when all his chickens are coming home to roost very soon.

Best Wishes to you all:
And he will no doubt be appearing before the beak soon after so much fowl play, the cock.
Scepticism is the chastity of the intellect.

Offline JohnnoWhite

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42601 on: September 12, 2019, 11:40:13 AM »
For the sake of ALL of our suffering people may it be so - and bloody soon!! Hate is a terrible word but as God is my witness, for what these abusive and supremely arrogant Tory bastards and their shadowy billionaire backers have deliberately inflicted on our people, I fucking hate ALL they stand for and ALL they ever will stand for.
There is nothing wrong with striving to win, so long as you don't set the prize above the game. There can be no dishonour in defeat nor any conceit in victory. What matters above all is that the team plays in the right spirit, with skill, courage, fair play,no favour and the result accepted without bitterness. Sir Matt Busby CBE KCSG 1909-1994

Offline kopite.keith

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42602 on: September 14, 2019, 06:27:28 PM »
For the sake of ALL of our suffering people may it be so - and bloody soon!! Hate is a terrible word but as God is my witness, for what these abusive and supremely arrogant Tory bastards and their shadowy billionaire backers have deliberately inflicted on our people, I fucking hate ALL they stand for and ALL they ever will stand for.

1000% with you on that Jonno. If I said what I really feel, people would think I was a psychopath 😡
When in Rome...

Offline Mutton Geoff

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42603 on: September 22, 2019, 07:33:13 PM »
For the sake of ALL of our suffering people may it be so - and bloody soon!! Hate is a terrible word but as God is my witness, for what these abusive and supremely arrogant Tory bastards and their shadowy billionaire backers have deliberately inflicted on our people, I fucking hate ALL they stand for and ALL they ever will stand for.

with you all the way i would add also these people who get too much airtime in the media like Oakshot, and the rest of the despicable "all mouth and opinion no morality or empathy" crowd.
The National Pensioners Convention (NPC) is the principal organisation representing pensioners in the United Kingdom. It is made up of around 1,000 bodies representing 1.5 million members, organised into federal regional units.
The NPC was founded by former Transport and General Workers' Union trade union leader, Jack Jones in 1979

Offline Mutton Geoff

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42604 on: October 9, 2019, 09:15:20 PM »
Bump
The National Pensioners Convention (NPC) is the principal organisation representing pensioners in the United Kingdom. It is made up of around 1,000 bodies representing 1.5 million members, organised into federal regional units.
The NPC was founded by former Transport and General Workers' Union trade union leader, Jack Jones in 1979

Offline Willi

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42605 on: October 9, 2019, 09:23:05 PM »
Well I'm there but extremely busy at the moment ;D

Offline Mutton Geoff

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42606 on: October 13, 2019, 07:58:54 PM »
Well I'm there but extremely busy at the moment ;D
For the last few months i have had to monitor my own BP and as i keep records of it, i have become aware that since i retired my BP is down around 10 points on average: I am still keeping myself busy but now going at my speed
The National Pensioners Convention (NPC) is the principal organisation representing pensioners in the United Kingdom. It is made up of around 1,000 bodies representing 1.5 million members, organised into federal regional units.
The NPC was founded by former Transport and General Workers' Union trade union leader, Jack Jones in 1979

Offline Willi

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42607 on: October 13, 2019, 10:24:11 PM »
I have noticed that, while I am extremely busy and occupied, things do take a lot longer to do.
2000 teabags arrived last week. Wonder how long they will last!!!!

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42608 on: October 13, 2019, 10:35:07 PM »
I have noticed that, while I am extremely busy and occupied, things do take a lot longer to do.
2000 teabags arrived last week. Wonder how long they will last!!!!

Where they delivered by the Cutty Sark? ;D

Offline The Gulleysucker

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42609 on: October 13, 2019, 11:11:17 PM »
So, two years on since this it's that time again...

They've changed it.

There's no longer the old smearing of the windows in the jobbie Advent calender.

Instead there's now a little stick thing with some grooves on the end that you scrape along your selected turd (caught using whatever method works for you) filling up the grooves, and then you pop it back into the plastic container and post it off.


Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.  - Sagan
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored. - Aldous Huxley
Law of Logical Argument   Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42610 on: October 13, 2019, 11:33:04 PM »
So, two years on since this it's that time again...


It's 55 rather than 60 in Liverpool Gulley. What's happening now? Is it another routine check mate?
laughing under sunny meadows

Offline The Gulleysucker

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42611 on: October 13, 2019, 11:46:13 PM »
It's 55 rather than 60 in Liverpool Gulley. What's happening now? Is it another routine check mate?

Yeah, I did a post later in the thread about them lowering the age for these tests.

It makes sense, the earlier any symptoms are detected the better the possible outcomes for anyone with problems.

This is just the routine one, every two years.

I had read that they were going to be moving to a new blood test instead but it seems not quite yet, but this was still a lot easier than last time.
Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.  - Sagan
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored. - Aldous Huxley
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Online Dr. Beaker

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42612 on: October 14, 2019, 01:54:16 PM »
So, two years on since this it's that time again...

They've changed it.

There's no longer the old smearing of the windows in the jobbie Advent calender.

Instead there's now a little stick thing with some grooves on the end that you scrape along your selected turd (caught using whatever method works for you) filling up the grooves, and then you pop it back into the plastic container and post it off.



Could I use one of those things you use for tiling because mine hasn't turned up yet?
Scepticism is the chastity of the intellect.

Online So... Howard Phillips

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42613 on: October 14, 2019, 07:06:14 PM »
Could I use one of those things you use for tiling because mine hasn't turned up yet?

Yes but don't confuse grout with a turd.

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42614 on: October 14, 2019, 07:53:19 PM »
So, two years on since this it's that time again...

They've changed it.

There's no longer the old smearing of the windows in the jobbie Advent calender.

Instead there's now a little stick thing with some grooves on the end that you scrape along your selected turd (caught using whatever method works for you) filling up the grooves, and then you pop it back into the plastic container and post it off.




Be a lot easier if we had the German style toilets


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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42615 on: October 14, 2019, 10:04:22 PM »
Be a lot easier if we had the German style toilets



I read once that they have the shelf so that health conscious Germans, after eating vast quantities of meat, can inspect their turds for worm infestation.

Or maybe I read it on the side of a bus with Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson gurning in front of it?

Offline The Gulleysucker

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42616 on: October 14, 2019, 10:19:00 PM »

Yes, the old Flachspüler

...Having these here would save all our catching heroics though I think the stench could prove problematic for more sensitive souls, especially after a night out and a curry which you normally want submerged under water asap and not to be sitting there steaming away while you are doing the crossword....

Psychoanalysis originated in Germany too...
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Offline Willi

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42617 on: October 14, 2019, 10:25:26 PM »
After a night on the Guiness those toilets spray shrapnel all over the place. Speaking from experience here.

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42618 on: October 15, 2019, 07:05:28 AM »
I worked/lived in Berlin for a month about 17 years ago and I found they weren't deep enough some mornings, having to stand up mid flow to flush to avoid contact and asphyxiation

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42619 on: October 15, 2019, 10:00:17 PM »
I lived in Germany for almost 5 years and we had one toilet like that and one "normal"  one,I was under strict orders from my missus on which toilet to use for what visit...

Offline "Albie Home For Christmas!" (via the 92A bus)

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42620 on: October 18, 2019, 10:56:30 AM »
Haven't been on for ages, been looking after my mum whos just died but saw this and  thought of our mate Johnnowhite, about lpool United rivalry but how much we're so similar. Always known that and wanted to share it with John
 https://www.liverpoolfc.com/news/features/368796-watch-free-video-us-and-them-manchester-united
Still Dreaming of a Harry Quinn

Offline Pheeny

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42621 on: October 18, 2019, 02:42:33 PM »
Haven't been on for ages, been looking after my mum whos just died
My thoughts are with you Albie.

Offline The Gulleysucker

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42622 on: October 18, 2019, 10:00:52 PM »
...been looking after my mum whos just died...

Albie, so sorry to hear of your Mum going.

I know from my own personal experience when my Mum went a few years ago that it's undoubtedly a bit of a tough time.
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Offline only6times

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42623 on: October 18, 2019, 11:46:13 PM »
Condolenses to you.
bitter,not me.a granddad,but I'm not even 40

Offline JohnnoWhite

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42624 on: October 24, 2019, 08:15:47 AM »
So, two years on since this it's that time again...

They've changed it.

There's no longer the old smearing of the windows in the jobbie Advent calender.

Instead there's now a little stick thing with some grooves on the end that you scrape along your selected turd (caught using whatever method works for you) filling up the grooves, and then you pop it back into the plastic container and post it off.




Just got mine - oh joy!!
There is nothing wrong with striving to win, so long as you don't set the prize above the game. There can be no dishonour in defeat nor any conceit in victory. What matters above all is that the team plays in the right spirit, with skill, courage, fair play,no favour and the result accepted without bitterness. Sir Matt Busby CBE KCSG 1909-1994

Offline JohnnoWhite

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42625 on: October 24, 2019, 08:24:32 AM »
Haven't been on for ages, been looking after my mum whos just died but saw this and  thought of our mate Johnnowhite, about lpool United rivalry but how much we're so similar. Always known that and wanted to share it with John
 https://www.liverpoolfc.com/news/features/368796-watch-free-video-us-and-them-manchester-united

Aw Albie, saddened to hear of your mum's passing. May she rest in eternal peace lad.

Have already seen this mate and there's no question in my mind and in the minds of a great many older generation Manc Reds that historically, it's dead right. For us, it's for sure the yardstick in our English game. Long may it continue!!
There is nothing wrong with striving to win, so long as you don't set the prize above the game. There can be no dishonour in defeat nor any conceit in victory. What matters above all is that the team plays in the right spirit, with skill, courage, fair play,no favour and the result accepted without bitterness. Sir Matt Busby CBE KCSG 1909-1994

Offline The Gulleysucker

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42626 on: October 24, 2019, 12:00:10 PM »
Just got mine - oh joy!!

Johnno, as I expect you'll find, not only is the sampling technique now easier, it appears to be a much faster turnaround now than last time.

I had my results within about 5 days of posting the sample off.

All appears to be currently well within the inner mysterious workings of my chutney bunker, though my wife may occasionally dispute that...

One thing I noticed in the small print was that these automatic biennial tests finish when you are 75, after that it seems you then have to request them yourself.
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Offline JohnnoWhite

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42627 on: October 25, 2019, 09:00:54 AM »
So then, 14 months to go until I hit the 3/4 of a century Gulley mate.
There is nothing wrong with striving to win, so long as you don't set the prize above the game. There can be no dishonour in defeat nor any conceit in victory. What matters above all is that the team plays in the right spirit, with skill, courage, fair play,no favour and the result accepted without bitterness. Sir Matt Busby CBE KCSG 1909-1994

Offline Mutton Geoff

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42628 on: October 27, 2019, 07:38:24 AM »
just seen this so sorry about your loss Albie
The National Pensioners Convention (NPC) is the principal organisation representing pensioners in the United Kingdom. It is made up of around 1,000 bodies representing 1.5 million members, organised into federal regional units.
The NPC was founded by former Transport and General Workers' Union trade union leader, Jack Jones in 1979

Offline kopite.keith

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42629 on: October 27, 2019, 10:39:38 AM »
Condolences to you Albie
When in Rome...

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42630 on: November 3, 2019, 04:16:14 PM »
How about 76
"Football is a simple game based on the giving and taking of passes, of controlling the ball and making yourself available to receive a pass, it is really that simple"

"Friend, mourn not, though he premature departs, his wisdom marches on within our hearts"
  
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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42631 on: November 3, 2019, 04:28:49 PM »
Hiya Johnno I am thinking of changing the story of my life from "I could have been a contender to "Shankly's Boy", what do you think?
"Football is a simple game based on the giving and taking of passes, of controlling the ball and making yourself available to receive a pass, it is really that simple"

"Friend, mourn not, though he premature departs, his wisdom marches on within our hearts"
  
RIP Ray Osbourne, comrade, epic swindler, and Internet Terrorist Extraordinaire.

Offline AndyMuller

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42632 on: November 5, 2019, 10:21:44 PM »
Anybody heard from Maggie May?

Offline JohnnoWhite

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42633 on: November 6, 2019, 12:00:08 PM »
Hiya Johnno I am thinking of changing the story of my life from "I could have been a contender to "Shankly's Boy", what do you think?


Alright Vic? If anyone in here has a better claim to that title change, they've kept their particular light well hidden under a bushel.
There is nothing wrong with striving to win, so long as you don't set the prize above the game. There can be no dishonour in defeat nor any conceit in victory. What matters above all is that the team plays in the right spirit, with skill, courage, fair play,no favour and the result accepted without bitterness. Sir Matt Busby CBE KCSG 1909-1994

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42634 on: November 6, 2019, 09:16:03 PM »
Anybody heard from Maggie May?
I hear from her sporadically on Facebook but not heard anything for a couple of weeks.

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42635 on: November 7, 2019, 11:58:38 AM »
This unique gem of a thread is in danger of disappearing up its own arse. Do we want to allow this to happen people? Very sad to witness its decline.
There is nothing wrong with striving to win, so long as you don't set the prize above the game. There can be no dishonour in defeat nor any conceit in victory. What matters above all is that the team plays in the right spirit, with skill, courage, fair play,no favour and the result accepted without bitterness. Sir Matt Busby CBE KCSG 1909-1994

Offline kopite.keith

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42636 on: November 8, 2019, 11:20:21 PM »
This unique gem of a thread is in danger of disappearing up its own arse. Do we want to allow this to happen people? Very sad to witness its decline.

Well Jonno, I suppose the catalyst for one or two of the more entertaining stories, which led to pages of humour, have not been around lately. Fat Scouser and Maggie May spring to mind, I hope they amongst others are keeping as well as can be expected. Could also be that those June celebrations take a lot longer to recover from these days. 😉
« Last Edit: November 8, 2019, 11:23:27 PM by kopite.keith »
When in Rome...

Offline kesey

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42637 on: November 9, 2019, 01:23:14 AM »
I read once that they have the shelf so that health conscious Germans, after eating vast quantities of meat, can inspect their turds for worm infestation.

Or maybe I read it on the side of a bus with Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson gurning in front of it?

Let's be honest here it's the first thing we all do after a good shit. I think it's in Chinese Medicine were they study peoples shit to check their health. It makes perfect sense that to me. 

An old story me Grandad tells me is in when he was in the army in the 50's a young lad wanted a shit so was told to go to the bush over there when one of the other lads was hiding behind it with a shovel. The young lad turned around .... not sure if it's true or not but still funny.
He who sees himself in all beings and all beings in himself loses all fear.

- The Upanishads.

He who expects freedom of speech should allow others to speak .  Me - Now.

He who sees twats really is a twat themselves - Me - Now .

Offline vivabobbycurmudgeongraham

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42638 on: November 9, 2019, 02:33:35 PM »
This unique gem of a thread is in danger of disappearing up its own arse. Do we want to allow this to happen people? Very sad to witness its decline.

You are right johnno. I am guilty of neglecting this thread. Just learned of Albies mums passing to which I pass on my belated  condolences to you Albie mate.

I have to return for a second viewing of the inner sanctum having had some polyps removed and analysed. There was some weird looking mass (I had a front row seat) they took a biopsy of and now want to dig it out so more moviprep and starvation in advance commences again a fortnight.
...If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same

Offline JohnnoWhite

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Re: Shanklyboy's auld arse thread - Over 1000 Pages of Wisdom For Young Uns!
« Reply #42639 on: November 11, 2019, 08:09:27 AM »
You are right johnno. I am guilty of neglecting this thread. Just learned of Albies mums passing to which I pass on my belated  condolences to you Albie mate.

I have to return for a second viewing of the inner sanctum having had some polyps removed and analysed. There was some weird looking mass (I had a front row seat) they took a biopsy of and now want to dig it out so more moviprep and starvation in advance commences again a fortnight.

I wish the very best of outcomes for you Bobby lad.

Some of the youngsters need to come and show their faces in OUR thread because one day, THEY will inherit the history, the funny stories and the social and political history it contains. There are some absolute gems in it both poignant and funny and I commend it to you all.
There is nothing wrong with striving to win, so long as you don't set the prize above the game. There can be no dishonour in defeat nor any conceit in victory. What matters above all is that the team plays in the right spirit, with skill, courage, fair play,no favour and the result accepted without bitterness. Sir Matt Busby CBE KCSG 1909-1994