Author Topic: Is Emmanuel Eboue the reason for the PL's downfall in Europe? (Read 7570 times)

Aristotle · « **on:** April 11, 2013, 02:28:14 pm »

Much has been discussed recently about which top flight division can rightfully claim to be the strongest on Europe. With the semi-finals of the Champions League now featuring 2 teams from the Bundesliga and 2 teams from La Liga respectfully, one would be made to believe these are the two strongest divisions in Europe as things stand. With the Bundesliga having 1/4 and La Liga 2/4 in last seasons semi-finals as well.

Now this got me thinking. What could be the explanation for the rise of the Bundesliga and La Liga - and more importantly the downfall of the Barclays Premier League, the self-proclaimed "best league in the world".

When researching the progression into the quarter finals of the Champions League, to see which leagues had the best chance of making it into the semi-finals I found quite an alarming statistic that, quite frankly, was too great to ignore. And I firmly believe that I have found the root of the problem.

In the 7 seasons Champions League alumni Emmanuel Eboué was part of Arsenal's squad English team averaged 2.57 teams in the quarter-finals of the Champions League. The Serie A had 1.29 teams. The Bundesliga had 0.71 teams. La Liga had 1.14 teams. Ligue 1 had 0.57 teams. Now I don't have to tell you, these numbers speak for themselves. They indicate quite an alarming trend. A trend that has largely gone unnoticed because of the PR work being done by Platini's agents, as we found out after Dortmund's dramatic winner against Malaga - they are the ones who decide who does and who does not make it into the Champions League semi-finals.

English teams when Eboué was there to pull the wagon

English teams without Eboué

Now I know this site frowns upon conspiracy theories but I think that this is too much of a "coincidence" to ignore and there's overwhelming evidence to support this theory.

Hij · « **Reply #1 on:** April 11, 2013, 02:30:18 pm »

Hoenheim · « **Reply #2 on:** April 11, 2013, 02:30:31 pm »

Seems legit, no Eboue no win

Samie · « **Reply #3 on:** April 11, 2013, 02:33:04 pm »

BRING EBOUE BACK!

Malaysian Kopite · « **Reply #4 on:** April 11, 2013, 02:33:30 pm »

Camarero25 · « **Reply #5 on:** April 11, 2013, 02:43:38 pm »

Thanks for that, some very interesting stats there.

Further underlining this, how many Turkish sides were in the quarter finals this season? 1. Which player did that side contain? Emmanuel Eboue.

GlenJohnson2 · « **Reply #6 on:** April 11, 2013, 02:44:25 pm »

No Eboue, no party

ChaChaMooMoo · « **Reply #7 on:** April 11, 2013, 03:23:29 pm »

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/n5mj0Huxajk" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" class="bbc_link bbc_flash_disabled new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/n5mj0Huxajk</a>

Il Capitano · « **Reply #8 on:** April 11, 2013, 03:38:25 pm »

He's not speaking Korean there. He's speaking Eboue.

GBF · « **Reply #9 on:** April 11, 2013, 03:50:07 pm »

I once heard that Eboue kicked a ball so hard and it caused the Great Wall to crack

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #10 on:** April 11, 2013, 03:52:56 pm »

Quote from: GBF on April 11, 2013, 03:50:07 pm

I once heard that Eboue kicked a ball so hard and it caused the Great Wall to crack

That would make sense as Emmanuel Eboue is the only footballer who's talent is visible from space.

Barneylfc∗ · « **Reply #11 on:** April 11, 2013, 03:53:48 pm »

B0151? · « **Reply #12 on:** April 11, 2013, 03:56:10 pm »

in other news

'Kevin Keegan says Michael Owen could have played on for another two or three years as a "world class midfield player" '

werent going to make a thread about it so may as well go in here

Samie · « **Reply #13 on:** April 11, 2013, 03:57:26 pm »

Quote from: Bakez0151 on April 11, 2013, 03:56:10 pm

in other news

'Kevin Keegan says Michael Owen could have played on for another two or three years as a "world class midfield player" '

werent going to make a thread about it so may as well go in here

Sent the twat (Owen) to Eboue. Manu will sort him out.

El Lobo · « **Reply #14 on:** April 11, 2013, 03:58:21 pm »

Quote from: Roxy Nick on April 11, 2013, 03:52:56 pm

That would make sense as Emmanuel Eboue is the only footballer who's ~~talent~~ arse is visible from space.

Advil · « **Reply #15 on:** April 11, 2013, 08:03:40 pm »

The korean video crack me up every single time. And his expression was flawless.

redgriffin73 · « **Reply #16 on:** April 11, 2013, 08:08:38 pm »

RedInside · « **Reply #17 on:** April 11, 2013, 08:50:12 pm »

Eboue is boss

mbyx6cg2 · « **Reply #18 on:** April 11, 2013, 08:55:12 pm »

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/0VHo1Twwer4?fs=1" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" class="bbc_link bbc_flash_disabled new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/0VHo1Twwer4?fs=1</a>

Aristotle · « **Reply #19 on:** April 11, 2013, 11:07:26 pm »

You just don't get quality like Eboue's anymore in the prem

-Willo- · « **Reply #20 on:** April 11, 2013, 11:11:28 pm »

Eboue has scored against Bolton in his career, Messi hasn't.
Eboue has played in the African Cup of Nations, Messi hasn't
Eboue has over 70 caps for Ivory Coast, Messi has 0

Just sayin'.

HighSix · « **Reply #21 on:** April 11, 2013, 11:22:39 pm »

Quote from: GBF on April 11, 2013, 03:50:07 pm

I once heard that Eboue kicked a ball so hard and it caused the Great Wall to crack

True... seen it.

Drinks Sangria · « **Reply #22 on:** April 11, 2013, 11:33:51 pm »

Excellent.

edge · « **Reply #23 on:** April 11, 2013, 11:41:30 pm »

Scored against Real, he did!

Mashy-rawr!nooo · « **Reply #24 on:** April 11, 2013, 11:48:29 pm »

Emmanuel doesn't put the ball into the net. The ball puts itself into the net. Sheer terror of the one they call Eboue.

Gifted Right Foot · « **Reply #25 on:** April 12, 2013, 12:08:52 am »

paulrazor · « **Reply #26 on:** April 12, 2013, 09:49:43 am »

fucked by eboue

GBF · « **Reply #27 on:** April 12, 2013, 09:57:02 am »

Eboue fingers better than cotton buds

Eboue is the Interviewer Whisper

The Fletcher Memorial · « **Reply #28 on:** April 12, 2013, 09:58:41 am »

What have I missed?

synthesis · « **Reply #29 on:** April 12, 2013, 09:59:15 am »

Quote from: Aristotle on April 11, 2013, 02:28:14 pm

English teams when Eboué was there to pull the wagon

This mostly just served to remind me how good Arsenal's team once was, even sans Vieira.

AB LFC · « **Reply #30 on:** April 12, 2013, 10:01:19 am »

Quote from: synthesis on April 12, 2013, 09:59:15 am

This mostly just served to remind me how good Arsenal's team once was, even sans Vieira.

My thoughts too. Brilliant team. All thanks to Eboue.

Fruity · « **Reply #31 on:** April 12, 2013, 10:20:37 am »

Quote from: HighSix on April 11, 2013, 11:22:39 pm

True... seen it.

He even coached adebayor in taking penalties

Earl of Dingleberry · « **Reply #32 on:** April 12, 2013, 12:26:56 pm »

Emmanuel Eboué has beaten Chuck Norris in keepy-uppy.

Aristotle · « **Reply #33 on:** April 16, 2013, 10:09:31 am »

Been pointed out to me on twitter that US troops stationed on the Korean border had been decreasing since 2004 by thousands per year. So massive demilitarization whilst Eboue was in the premier league, now that he's gone. We're on the brink of war.

I'm not saying there's anything to this, that this is some illuminati revenge plot. I'm just saying ... read between the lines.

Ben_AFC · « **Reply #34 on:** April 16, 2013, 10:25:30 am »

Wasn't aware that Eboue was a 'cult' figure outside of Arsenal circles.. Strange.

Ben_AFC · « **Reply #35 on:** April 16, 2013, 10:27:41 am »

Quote from: synthesis on April 12, 2013, 09:59:15 am

This mostly just served to remind me how good Arsenal's team once was, even sans Vieira.

Me too.

Aristotle · « **Reply #36 on:** April 16, 2013, 04:27:00 pm »

Quote from: Ben_AFC on April 16, 2013, 10:25:30 am

Wasn't aware that Eboue was a 'cult' figure outside of Arsenal circles.. Strange.

It's not really about Eboué. It's a satire of the people who mistake correlating stats for causation and fact. And how even though very helpful and insightful at times. If you don't know what you're doing stats can prove or disprove just about anything you want.

paulrazor · « **Reply #37 on:** April 16, 2013, 04:36:56 pm »

Eboue has defeat Hulk Hogan, Bret Hart and Steve austin in a 1 on 3 handicap match.

by order of elimination, Hart locked Eboue in a sharpshooter, Hart Tapped out.

Next up Hogan attempted a leg drop, Eboue blinked slightly, Hogan suffered bruising to his spine and a ruptured hamstring.

and lastly after just two minutes of action Stone Cold hit Eboue with a stunner, Eboue felt a slight itch but Stone cold broke his collar bone and suffered a broken arm.

Eboue won.

Dirk18Kuyt · « **Reply #38 on:** May 19, 2013, 01:57:27 am »

How funny would that clip have been if the camera panned round and he was taking a picture of his own face, christ.

Rojo O Muerto · « **Reply #39 on:** May 19, 2013, 02:13:23 am »

Down low.