Topic: RAWK Ashes Simulator

[Kekule]

It came off my arm guard. Nowhere near my bat, and before you anyone says it the arm guard is not touching my gloves. Dodgy, dodgy umpiring, who gave the job to Dharmesena?

Is your arm guard made of willow as well then?!

From where I was crouching it looked and sounded like you practically smashed the cover off it.

[Crosby Nick]

Is your arm guard made of willow as well then?!

From where I was crouching it looked and sounded like you practically smashed the cover off it.

That doesn’t sound like Welshy to be fair.

[Welshred]

Is your arm guard made of willow as well then?!

From where I was crouching it looked and sounded like you practically smashed the cover off it.

Impressive sounding 'top edge' then or maybe you need to get your hearing aid recalibrated!

That doesn’t sound like Welshy to be fair.

Friendly fire...

[Gerry Attrick]

That doesn’t sound like Welshy to be fair.

Slating our own players. You're no friend of ours...

[Samie]

Team White Kop is united. Red Kop keep sledging it's own players. 

[voodoo ray]

Team White Kop is united. Red Kop keep sledging it's own players. 

all the best teams have a bit of friction between their players

[Welshred]

all the best teams have a bit of friction between their players

Fancy setting up a Twitter account? @BDNgenius would be the one I'm going for

[Elzar]

Hate between players causes them to defend their wicket better, can’t be seen to be the weak one can you?

All part of my captaincy.

[Samie]

The defeated, deflated Red Kop.

[Kekule]

Get in!!!

Well played Max, well done skip. Good effort all round lads.  See you in the bar.

[Samie]

Team White Kop is out to party tonight. 

[Samie]

I think Red Kop should be questioning their captain, is he the right man to lead? 

[Gerry Attrick]

Definitely not fixed. Repeat, definitely not fixed...

[Samie]

I predict a 6-0 whitewash. 

[Welshred]

Email the ICC anticorruption unit right away

[Kekule]

I predict a 6-0 whitewash. 

Fighting amongst themselves, questioning the umpires decisions, unsubstantiated accusations of match fixing. Red Kop are an utter shambles at the moment. 

Win the next one and they’ll properly start to unravel.

[voodoo ray]

diabolical performance in that chase. no blame going to the tail for not making it, they're down there because they can't bat.

[Prof]

A special mention for Samie, who has an average of infinity with 136 runs scored!

[Samie]

 

Yay, I'm good for something.

[Prof]

Anyone want to volunteer to write up some most match analysis and interviews?

I'm keen to hear what Voodoo was signalling as he walked off

[Elzar]

I think Red Kop should be questioning their captain, is he the right man to lead? 

Classic.

Now isn’t the time to panic, it was a close tie that came down a miscounting on the scorers part for you lot to win it. The captaincy and the team has never been stronger. We’ll win by an innings in the next match, or I’ll step down from my role in the middle of the wicket.

[Crosby Nick]

Look at Waugh and Warne. Friction is good as they say.

We’ll batter them in the next Test.

Why hasn’t it started yet Prof (you lazy prick)?

[Gerry Attrick]

Hopefully Durlmints hasn't got a bad back from carrying the attack in the first test.

[voodoo ray]

*bangs gloves together*

come on lads. we'll twat them next time.

[Samie]

I can smell the desperation from the Red Kop lads. 

[voodoo ray]

Anyone want to volunteer to write up some most match analysis and interviews?

I'm keen to hear what Voodoo was signalling as he walked off

"get me a pint ready"

[Crosby Nick]

I can smell the desperation from the Red Kop lads. 

That’s your kebab farts.

[Prof]

Look at Waugh and Warne. Friction is good as they say.

We’ll batter them in the next Test.

Why hasn’t it started yet Prof (you lazy prick)?

I'm sure I saw a report from Gerry in here a short while ago.  I was waiting to have that round things up before starting with the build up for Lord's.

[Gerry Attrick]

I'm sure I saw a report from Gerry in here a short while ago.  I was waiting to have that round things up before starting with the build up for Lord's.

I did but then I realised it'd take me donkeys to write one for 5 days, so I binned it If you allow me a big score in the 2nd test I'll reconsider.

[Prof]

I did but then I realised it'd take me donkeys to write one for 5 days, so I binned it If you allow me a big score in the 2nd test I'll reconsider.

I was only thinking a quick summary and a few key quotes 

[Prof]

Anyway... I'll get the next match going in a bit...

I hope you're all enjoying it as much as I am 

[Gerry Attrick]

I was only thinking a quick summary and a few key quotes 

A key quote you say. Sky Sports did a vox pop outside the ground and asked about Elzar's captaincy. One famous supporter said he'd come down from Manchester and in an impassioned monologue said "Elzar is nothing, he's a fool and a waste of time. Goodnight"

[Elzar]

Listen, when you’re hearing these kind of comments from your own supporters it can be tough. Luckily I lost my hearing at the age of 6 so I can’t hear any of them. What has been said?

[Samie]

You've been called a "Fuel" mate.

[Elzar]

You've been called a "Fuel" mate.

Delighted to see so many of our supporters can see I am whats driving this team on.

[Prof]

I might have got a bit carried way with my commentary 

[Crosby Nick]

Excellent stuff Gerald. Leading from the front.

[Kekule]

Short leg snaffler.

[Elzar]

The only reason I signed up to this, heard a Lords Lunch is special

[Samie]

@Prof 


I did not know there was a camera following me for whatever I did to Bradman.