Author Topic: Struggling with depression (Read 626194 times)

terrible suits · « **Reply #6000 on:** June 26, 2016, 10:54:25 pm »

Quote from: Ralph the Fruit on June 26, 2016, 10:41:35 pm

All this shit about our countries future is really starting to get to me.The scaremongering really does play on the mind and make me worry that we're going to be living in a third world lawless country with nothing but hate and despair.

Want to trade places?
On the other hand, coming to the US, you might find the same sentiment over here.

PeterJM · « **Reply #6001 on:** June 26, 2016, 11:05:02 pm »

Quote from: terrisus on June 26, 2016, 10:54:25 pm

Want to trade places?
On the other hand, coming to the US, you might find the same sentiment over here.

I'd trade in an instant.This country and the way some of the people are behaving disgusts me.

terrible suits · « **Reply #6002 on:** June 26, 2016, 11:07:43 pm »

Quote from: Ralph the Fruit on June 26, 2016, 11:05:02 pm

I'd trade in an instant.This country and the way some of the people are behaving disgusts me.

If you have a way through the logistics of it, I would gladly take you up on that offer.

PeterJM · « **Reply #6003 on:** June 26, 2016, 11:26:52 pm »

Quote from: terrisus on June 26, 2016, 11:07:43 pm

If you have a way through the logistics of it, I would gladly take you up on that offer.

I wish i did but i could never get a US visa.

terrible suits · « **Reply #6004 on:** June 26, 2016, 11:33:57 pm »

Quote from: Ralph the Fruit on June 26, 2016, 11:26:52 pm

I wish i did but i could never get a US visa.

Oh, that's the easy part.
Come over here for a "vacation," have a child, problem solved.

Getting me into the UK, however...
There's no way in the world that they would even let me out of the airport.

Fiasco · « **Reply #6005 on:** June 28, 2016, 06:02:42 pm »

I'm really concerned about my brother at the moment. He's bi-polar and has struggled massively for years but especially so in the last two or three. I think I have it bad sometimes but I look at him and I just want to cry. He's been on every medication you can think off, second and third line anti-depressants and anti-psychotics. He's on lithium for the bi-polar and he's currently coming off a stupidly high doze of Venlafaxine and is having heroin-like withdrawals.

The concern isn't just that, the concern is that on the search history on the family computer I've found searches for Euthanasia clinics, home-made cocktails to send you into a permanent sleep, that kind of thing. Me and my Mum have mentioned it to him in a gentle, non-confrontational way and he admitted to it but said he was just curious and whatnot. Every single day 2 or 3 parcels get delivered to him and many come here if he is asleep or not at home. We don't know what he's ordering, but we cannot actually stop him, he's 32 and we cannot control him that way but at the same time we are very concerned at what he might be ordering.

Yesterday my Mum had an allergic reaction to a fucking Pear of all things and we had to get an ambulance for her. She is OK thankfully, nothing too serious but she needed to be taken in to hospital to make sure the swelling and itchiness went down. I went over to his house to tell him and he was in bed, dead to the world. He had no idea what I was saying to him. This was 5-6 pm. He's constantly wiped out with the meds and when he's not he'll sleep every hour he can because he doesn't want to face the world (I know that feeling, but his is to the extreme).

We just don't know where to turn. He's under the home treatment team at Whiston and they see him once a week, and we tried contacting the Crisis team but they said they need to speak to him directly and he doesn't feel it's necessary. The searches for Euthanasia clinics and other things have really got the entire family worried, if we don't hear from him for an hour we ring him and go over and check on him. I just want him to be happy, he's a really good guy who would not harm a fly (I mean that literally, he loves animals more than anything).

Depression. It's a fucking bastard I tell you.

Haemoglobin · « **Reply #6006 on:** June 28, 2016, 06:55:40 pm »

Sorry to hear that man. This is why I think many who find themselves struggling with depressive conditions - when it isn't just a passing low feeling, but instead feels like your body simply isn't producing the required brain chemical balance to function - are extremely reluctant to dive into the foggy world of strong prescription meds. I personally think it has to be a last resort once all other avenues and milder pharmaceutical applications have been exhausted.

It's worth sticking with it through a period of discomfort using less heavy medicines, to see if you can adjust more naturally. Obviously if you can't, after a decent span of time given to trying, and if you reach a genuine crisis point (not during a particularly stressful moment, but in your downtime when you should by rights be feeling relaxed and okay), then you have to try the next step up in treatment. Sounds like your bro needs to try something new to help him out of this rut, if only to give him some renewed hope.

Try to look into new trials for treatments that may be on the horizon, so that he feels it's worth holding out just for a better chance at treating the illness further down the line - in the meantime, he might find himself stumble across some better days here and there, while he's waiting for that magic bullet treatment to emerge. Better that than denying himself the opportunity to ever make any recovery. It's hard to get through to people going through what he is, I know, but what he requires is hope, and if he can't generate it himself, he needs it fed to him. Good luck, man.

Quote from: Fiasco on June 28, 2016, 06:02:42 pm

Depression. It's a fucking bastard I tell you.

Perhaps the ultimate fucking bastard, given that it diminishes or removes entirely the ability to appreciate the beautiful moments that are there for you to experience, while otherwise having a perfectly fuctional physical vessel in which to experience it - you have all your working organs, limbs, vision, hearing, etc. but you cannot live.

However long it may feel like it lasts though, it is not a permanent state of being, and you all will have opportunities to feel alive again, there will always be moments like that to come, wherever you are now and however bleak the future may look. Death by your own hand forfeits all of that for a brief bit of relief from an impermanent state of torment. Not a good deal, on reflection.

OLDIE · « **Reply #6007 on:** July 1, 2016, 12:18:47 am »

Quote from: Fiasco on June 28, 2016, 06:02:42 pm

I'm really concerned about my brother at the moment. He's bi-polar and has struggled massively for years but especially so in the last two or three. I think I have it bad sometimes but I look at him and I just want to cry. He's been on every medication you can think off, second and third line anti-depressants and anti-psychotics. He's on lithium for the bi-polar and he's currently coming off a stupidly high doze of Venlafaxine and is having heroin-like withdrawals.

The concern isn't just that, the concern is that on the search history on the family computer I've found searches for Euthanasia clinics, home-made cocktails to send you into a permanent sleep, that kind of thing. Me and my Mum have mentioned it to him in a gentle, non-confrontational way and he admitted to it but said he was just curious and whatnot. Every single day 2 or 3 parcels get delivered to him and many come here if he is asleep or not at home. We don't know what he's ordering, but we cannot actually stop him, he's 32 and we cannot control him that way but at the same time we are very concerned at what he might be ordering.

Yesterday my Mum had an allergic reaction to a fucking Pear of all things and we had to get an ambulance for her. She is OK thankfully, nothing too serious but she needed to be taken in to hospital to make sure the swelling and itchiness went down. I went over to his house to tell him and he was in bed, dead to the world. He had no idea what I was saying to him. This was 5-6 pm. He's constantly wiped out with the meds and when he's not he'll sleep every hour he can because he doesn't want to face the world (I know that feeling, but his is to the extreme).

We just don't know where to turn. He's under the home treatment team at Whiston and they see him once a week, and we tried contacting the Crisis team but they said they need to speak to him directly and he doesn't feel it's necessary. The searches for Euthanasia clinics and other things have really got the entire family worried, if we don't hear from him for an hour we ring him and go over and check on him. I just want him to be happy, he's a really good guy who would not harm a fly (I mean that literally, he loves animals more than anything).

Depression. It's a fucking bastard I tell you.

Mate, my heart goes out to you.

Having been in a room where the only handle is on the outside, I can from experience say to you that all though times are tough the chances are your brother will get to a point where he gets life once again ! Sorry no offence, it took me 9 years to get there and I know the pleasure that one feels when you eventually arrive at your destination.

Sorry if you think this bollocks

OLDIE · « **Reply #6008 on:** July 1, 2016, 12:27:43 am »

Ok speaking openly and without causing mayhem.

Depression is a mental illness, an illness that I have been sectioned for in the past, it is gross, it is devastating and more importantly it is a disease that effects both the body and mind.

I attempted to end it all in 2003 and ever since I have been on "watch" and the ignorance of people is unbelievable the downright crass views against the mentally ill is not acceptable.

I have experienced most things, but most of all, the most helpful of all support, is the knowledge that someone out their truly is there for you, that love cant be bought, that desire to assist your fellow man is not for sale, politically nor finacially.

If anyone wants private help or just a mentor PM me.

I have tried to kill myself in the past, so no judgement just a helping hand

AshbourneRed · « **Reply #6009 on:** July 2, 2016, 08:59:53 pm »

Could anyone who has experience in helping others give me a PM. I'd really appreciate it.

Barneylfc∗ · « **Reply #6010 on:** July 3, 2016, 02:23:37 am »

I generally avoid this thread like the plague as I feel my issues pale in significance to others. I've posted a few times in here, but I do tend to try to convince myself I don't need help.

As a few may know, 2 years ago I was happier than I've ever been. A family, steady job, getting married bla bla bla. She fucked me off for some gobshite she worked for, the fucking idiot.

It's shite. It was last April. 16 months ago. Yet still I feel like I'm worthless every day. I'm struggling massively in work when in March last year I was literally the go to person when someone didn't know what to do or how work the system. How the fuck can shit change literally overnight?

Barneylfc∗ · « **Reply #6011 on:** July 3, 2016, 03:04:26 am »

It's a massive pile of bollocks this is. 34 years old. Living with my sister and can't see a way out of this. I spend beyond my means, mainly trying to keep my kid happy but I'd save over £200 a month if I didn't drink during work. £200. That's a shit load of coin just on a few pints. If I didn't do that though, I'd have no one to talk to about what's going on. I'm on my own when I'm not in work, so it's all fucked

Barneylfc∗ · « **Reply #6012 on:** July 3, 2016, 05:12:04 am »

Life is an absoulte pile of bollocks really when you think about it. Whats the point? All you do is survive until you die. You don't want to die too early so you survive that little bit longer for the benefit of someone else. In my case, that's my son. I can't help but feel I'm a failure to him. I know I'm not, because his hugs at night and in the morning when he is with me are what keeps me going, but its all a lie. I can't give him the future that he deserves. I can't give myself the future I wanted when I was his age because it's been drilled into me that I'm not good enough. Fuck this fucking life.

terrible suits · « **Reply #6013 on:** July 3, 2016, 06:11:19 am »

Quote from: Barneylfc please? for about half an hour on July 3, 2016, 05:12:04 am

Life is an absoulte pile of bollocks really when you think about it. Whats the point?

Quote from: Barneylfc please? for about half an hour on July 3, 2016, 05:12:04 am

my son

"A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives" -Jackie Robinson

Be thankful that you have someone whose life you can have an impact on.
I know you may feel that you're not living up to it - but that's plenty of purpose for life right there.

Peabee · « **Reply #6014 on:** July 3, 2016, 09:35:22 am »

Quote from: Barneylfc please? for about half an hour on July 3, 2016, 02:23:37 am

I generally avoid this thread like the plague as I feel my issues pale in significance to others. I've posted a few times in here, but I do tend to try to convince myself I don't need help.

As a few may know, 2 years ago I was happier than I've ever been. A family, steady job, getting married bla bla bla. She fucked me off for some gobshite she worked for, the fucking idiot.

It's shite. It was last April. 16 months ago. Yet still I feel like I'm worthless every day. I'm struggling massively in work when in March last year I was literally the go to person when someone didn't know what to do or how work the system. How the fuck can shit change literally overnight?

It's all relative mate. For example, none of us in here are going through what people in war-torn countries are experiencing. That doesn't mean we shouldn't get help or accept help.

I felt like you a short while ago, everything seemed pointless/hopeless and it felt like there'd be no end to it. I stopped drinking, took up running, got myself in great shape physically, yet mentally I still wasn't feeling right. I went to my GP and told her everything, and although things got worse for a bit - that saying seems to be true - I'm starting to feel like I might get back to normal.

My point is that there is hope; it's just that when you are depressed, you can't see it. My best mate killed himself 4 years ago and the impact on his family and friends has been terrible. He never asked for help nor told anyone fully what he was going through. You have a son who, even though it may not feel like it, will love you unconditionally, so you do have something to live for; you may have to go through a period of sacrifice (e.g. Knocking the drink on the head) to get there, but you can get better if you accept you need help.

The first thing I'd do is look at whether it's the drink, and could you stop for a bit to see how that affects your mood?

ghost1359 · « **Reply #6015 on:** July 5, 2016, 11:47:51 am »

The wheels are coming off lads. Had a breakdown a few years ago and haven't felt this bad since then.

Massive mood swings, very, very high anxiety, very deep and prolonged lows.

My personal life is extremely stressful right now and I'm struggling to cope with it.

I know I have to eat right, exercise, stay positive, meditate etc but is there anything else that anyone would recommend? I spent all day and night yesterday bursting into tears. In the office now and feel exactly the same.

princeoftherocks · « **Reply #6016 on:** July 6, 2016, 12:02:11 am »

this is war. i will not willingly be bound. you show me what you like but i'm focused on what i want to see.
i will begin so frail, nurturing the little seeds of hope which will grow as strength, the foundation for my
happiness. i am looking to the horizon. my horizon.

Good vibes to you all!!! you'll never walk alone.

Red Beret · « **Reply #6017 on:** July 11, 2016, 07:56:40 pm »

It's mid July and I am using my SAD light box because it feels like it's fecking October outside. A mild October perhaps, but still October. Feel so worn out and down in the dumps it's unreal.

OLDIE · « **Reply #6018 on:** July 11, 2016, 11:50:13 pm »

Anyone else find that the changing of medication fucks you over for ages ?

surfer. Fuck you generator. · « **Reply #6019 on:** July 13, 2016, 07:06:03 am »

Quote from: ghost1359 on July 5, 2016, 11:47:51 am

The wheels are coming off lads. Had a breakdown a few years ago and haven't felt this bad since then.

Massive mood swings, very, very high anxiety, very deep and prolonged lows.

My personal life is extremely stressful right now and I'm struggling to cope with it.

I know I have to eat right, exercise, stay positive, meditate etc but is there anything else that anyone would recommend? I spent all day and night yesterday bursting into tears. In the office now and feel exactly the same.

Hope you're alright ghost.

Can you find a way to discard the source of personal problems in your life? If you can, then the healing can start. The rest about exercising, eating and all that are secondary, you need to manage your way out of the primary issue for it to be a long term solution.

evie · « **Reply #6020 on:** July 29, 2016, 09:53:15 pm »

I seriously fucking dont get you guys. You...men. What do I have to do? Do I have to get a boobjob? Do I have to get myself ducklips? Get superblond hairextensions and go to a tanning salon every other day? Do I have to look like some fucking freakshow for guys to notice me?

Sorry. I've just been alone for so long it's eating me from the inside and I really feel guys just want a girlfriend that looks like a model. At least that's the way it is over here. But then again, women over here do look like models in general so I guess guys only want the best. I really hate this superficial city sometimes. It's not just relationships with guys though. I don't know why other women hate me so much. I don't know why women don't want to get to know me and be friends with me. I'm a good person.

Lonely and depressed. As. Fuck.

Can't wait for the new season to start. At least I'll have that as a distraction.

please, I have my reasons for it but... · « **Reply #6021 on:** August 2, 2016, 12:44:09 am »

My boss who was like a big brother first quits, then his protege, a good guy in the office and someone quite competent and who I actually got quite well with, also quits, then a best friend from college died.

The 2nd boss quitting and my friend dying on the same day. Unfuckingreal.

Heart broken is not even the word.

Persephone · « **Reply #6022 on:** August 2, 2016, 05:45:56 am »

Quote from: evie on July 29, 2016, 09:53:15 pm

I seriously fucking dont get you guys. You...men. What do I have to do? Do I have to get a boobjob? Do I have to get myself ducklips? Get superblond hairextensions and go to a tanning salon every other day? Do I have to look like some fucking freakshow for guys to notice me?

Sorry. I've just been alone for so long it's eating me from the inside and I really feel guys just want a girlfriend that looks like a model. At least that's the way it is over here. But then again, women over here do look like models in general so I guess guys only want the best. I really hate this superficial city sometimes. It's not just relationships with guys though. I don't know why other women hate me so much. I don't know why women don't want to get to know me and be friends with me. I'm a good person.

Lonely and depressed. As. Fuck.

Can't wait for the new season to start. At least I'll have that as a distraction.

Life can feel really lonely at times, if you feel like you need someone to chat to PM me.

pascoli · « **Reply #6023 on:** August 13, 2016, 10:26:06 am »

Good to know theres nearly always a light at the end of the tunnel, or a golden sky at the end of a storm. It may take a while to reach it and at times it may seem unreachable but its there. Shine on you crazy diamonds !!

deFacto please, you bastards · « **Reply #6024 on:** August 14, 2016, 12:07:37 am »

don't know if I'm depressed, but the only thing that keeps me going is the fact that others depend on me, and need me,and i have to be strong for them otherwise I would give up.

terrible suits · « **Reply #6025 on:** August 14, 2016, 08:41:46 pm »

Quote from: deFacto on August 14, 2016, 12:07:37 am

don't know if I'm depressed, but the only thing that keeps me going is the fact that others depend on me, and need me,and i have to be strong for them otherwise I would give up.

More or less the same with me.
Although in my case, "others" means "my cats."
I'm hoping they outlive me (they probably will).

CHOPPER · « **Reply #6026 on:** August 14, 2016, 09:03:18 pm »

Quote from: pascoli on August 13, 2016, 10:26:06 am

Good to know theres nearly always a light at the end of the tunnel, or a golden sky at the end of a storm. It may take a while to reach it and at times it may seem unreachable but its there. Shine on you crazy diamonds !!

You should post more la. .....Not that you're any good like, you just make me look good like.

Seriously tho' fella, good to see you post on these boards. Post more often!

Keep RAWK scouse!

Commie Bobbie · « **Reply #6027 on:** August 15, 2016, 11:05:34 am »

Have had my Sertraline upped to 150mg this morning - seems like every time I increase the dose - the low mood and anxiety tends to become less intense - but only for a few weeks - or months at best - and then it becomes beyond unbearable - like I have a weight on my head.

Have taken about six days off work over the past three months - which is six days too much for me - just seems like an never ending circle of utter pain.

butchersdog · « **Reply #6028 on:** August 16, 2016, 06:08:39 pm »

If anyone wants advice, or just someone to talk to, feel free to pm me. Nobody should suffer alone. I've been through the ringer in the past and can really relate to a lot of the stories in here.

BlackandWhitePaul · « **Reply #6029 on:** August 18, 2016, 10:18:43 am »

I don't post in here but thought I'd ask you's a question / seek advice if that is okay.

I have a friend who has been diagnosed Bipolar.

When they are down, really down, what is the best thing for me to do?

For 4 days now I'm ignored, completely. Don't get an answer on the phone, don't get replies to text messages, facebook messenger or anything else.

Plans that were made by two of us to do things, go places are cancelled by them and I'm thinking, they must really fucking hate me, ignore me and treat me like shit.

Do I keep on showing them I care for them by sending supporting messages to show I care, or do I just leave them alone till they are feeling better with themselves?

I'm kinda thinking if I keep sending texts and trying to call they might get fed up of it and tell me to fuck off for good for pestering them all the time but if I give them a wide berth for a while they may think I don't give a toss about them.

Haemoglobin · « **Reply #6030 on:** August 18, 2016, 12:54:51 pm »

Give them space, but keep trying to bring them out into the world. The trick is not to keep "at them", but not to just leave them for ages to descend into their own solipsistic spiral of disengagement with everything outside either. Most people try to force it, calling them very regularly and more or less trying to drag them along to things, and then give up on the person when they don't respond well and basically fuck them off, if only for a while.

I'm not bipolar or anything like that, but I have times when I can't be arsed dealing with anyone and want to be left to myself for a bit, switch off the phone and do something which gives me some peace. If you're really ill, you need occasional contact lines still open, and someone to draw you back into the world of the living when you're ready. Pestering, mithering or abandoning (as far as they might see it, having pushed you away) them won't do any good.

Brace yourself, it requires real patience to properly support a loved one sufferng with a serious mental illness, but always keep in mind that they are suffering. Don't take too much shit either, sometimes psychologically unwell people can take the piss, take advantage, depends on the person. Having healthy close friends can both be a privilege they're grateful for, and a real downer for them.

evie · « **Reply #6031 on:** August 19, 2016, 08:05:17 pm »

The past few months have been very up and down for me but today was a brilliant day. I've become a huge fan of the Pittsburgh Penguins since the start of the year and got to see the Stanley Cup when one of the Swedish players that won it brought it to a rink near his hometown.

Me and Carl Hagelin

Commie Bobbie · « **Reply #6032 on:** September 5, 2016, 10:38:18 pm »

So as I have mentioned previously- my medication has been increased and dare I say - I haven't seen any fucking change at all. If anything I've seen a gradual worsening of how I feel. I'm not talking to people at work, where we're on a week on the phone, and a week on ad min, it is extremely easy for me to just rock up, and not talk to anyone all day, and as the day goes on on and everyone around me are all laughing and joking and all that shite and there's me with my headset on, even though I'm not talking to anyone - just trying to keep my head in check and then let it all out when I get home.

As I have also mentioned previously, my childhood was shall I say, eventful - and in December will be the 20th anniversary of me confiding to the police of the abuse that I suffered - I can't get that anniversary out of my head, just feels like I continue to live a life sentence - but it's worse than being in prison as I have to earn a living, and pay my bills whilst keeping a lid on my emotions, which is getting harder and harder and I genuinely don't know what I can do anymore.

Dr_Evil · « **Reply #6033 on:** September 6, 2016, 02:53:50 pm »

I have suffered from Depression for over two years now, in which time my marriage broke down, I left my family home and now live on my own.

In the time I've taken medication (Citalopram), I've been to counselling, I've talked (and talked, and talked), I've exercised, eaten right, tried to sleep better etc etc.

The problem is that you think you're better - then you're blindsided by feelings of despair and desperation; sometimes something has happen...other times your thoughts go to a dark place.

I'm considerably better than I was a year ago; however, I compounded the difficulty of my own mental health by going out with a woman who is bipolar. The mix is at times exhilarating, other times devastating. The person who has the ability to understand me most also has the power to rip me to shreds.

These days I'm able to open mail, read email, answer my phone, read text messages - a year ago I could do none of those things. I can concentrate in longer bursts at work again. I still have bad days; just ten days ago I had thoughts of harming myself.

It doesn't get better overnight. We can help ourselves; we also have the ability to set ourselves back. Talking to people helps, but choose those you speak to carefully. Give yourself the time to clear your head of everything, concentrate on your breathing. See your doctor. Speak to your family - but let them know what not to say - sometimes well intentioned sympathy can feed your own despair. Most importantly - be kind to yourself. Give yourself a break. Look after yourself.

Corkboy · « **Reply #6034 on:** September 9, 2016, 01:59:30 pm »

<a href="https://www.youtube.com/v/cDYAgurah8g" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" class="bbc_link bbc_flash_disabled new_win">https://www.youtube.com/v/cDYAgurah8g</a>

Alex Raisbeck · « **Reply #6035 on:** September 9, 2016, 02:34:30 pm »

Quote from: BlackandWhitePaul on August 18, 2016, 10:18:43 am

I don't post in here but thought I'd ask you's a question / seek advice if that is okay.

I have a friend who has been diagnosed Bipolar.

When they are down, really down, what is the best thing for me to do?

For 4 days now I'm ignored, completely. Don't get an answer on the phone, don't get replies to text messages, facebook messenger or anything else.

Plans that were made by two of us to do things, go places are cancelled by them and I'm thinking, they must really fucking hate me, ignore me and treat me like shit.

Do I keep on showing them I care for them by sending supporting messages to show I care, or do I just leave them alone till they are feeling better with themselves?

I'm kinda thinking if I keep sending texts and trying to call they might get fed up of it and tell me to fuck off for good for pestering them all the time but if I give them a wide berth for a while they may think I don't give a toss about them.

The best thing you can do is allow the person to respond in their own time when they're out of the periodic cycle and when you are next in their company let them know that you are only a phone call away-at any time day or night, should they need help or a talk-also let them know that it's absolutely okay to cancel any plans that you had at short notice.
There isn't an awful lot you can do as a friend when they are in the cycle-text messages/phone calls will only add to the pressure that they feel as they will be questioning themselves and feeling like a burden already, another no-no are 'pep talks' (which some people patronisingly attempt).
I hope that's of some help-I have an understanding of this mental issue.

Commie Bobbie · « **Reply #6036 on:** October 2, 2016, 10:41:51 pm »

So, last week at work I had four emotional breakdowns - and I cannot see just how I get out of this rut right now, went to another doctor on Friday who said that they would refer me to an psychiatrist but in each of my last five appointments they have said this and I've heard fuck all.

Spent last night up in Chelmsford seeing a mate from uni whose up there - and for those few precious couple of hours, I felt a certain form of relief easing but then on the bus replacement service back into the capital I had yet another breakdown out of nothing, I'm dreading work tomorrow, just getting up right now, and getting ready for work feels like an achievement for me.

Don't know if I had I've got much left in the tank.

trinityroad · « **Reply #6037 on:** October 2, 2016, 10:51:02 pm »

Quote from: Commie Bobbie on October 2, 2016, 10:41:51 pm

So, last week at work I had four emotional breakdowns - and I cannot see just how I get out of this rut right now, went to another doctor on Friday who said that they would refer me to an psychiatrist but in each of my last five appointments they have said this and I've heard fuck all.

Spent last night up in Chelmsford seeing a mate from uni whose up there - and for those few precious couple of hours, I felt a certain form of relief easing but then on the bus replacement service back into the capital I had yet another breakdown out of nothing, I'm dreading work tomorrow, just getting up right now, and getting ready for work feels like an achievement for me.

Don't know if I had I've got much left in the tank.

Hang in there mate, you're not alone.

Keep talking to people about it. Have you tried Samaritans and Rethink?

Persephone · « **Reply #6038 on:** October 3, 2016, 09:59:59 am »

Quote from: Commie Bobbie on October 2, 2016, 10:41:51 pm

So, last week at work I had four emotional breakdowns - and I cannot see just how I get out of this rut right now, went to another doctor on Friday who said that they would refer me to an psychiatrist but in each of my last five appointments they have said this and I've heard fuck all.

Spent last night up in Chelmsford seeing a mate from uni whose up there - and for those few precious couple of hours, I felt a certain form of relief easing but then on the bus replacement service back into the capital I had yet another breakdown out of nothing, I'm dreading work tomorrow, just getting up right now, and getting ready for work feels like an achievement for me.

Don't know if I had I've got much left in the tank.

Going to work is an achievement mate, everyday that you get up and attempt to live your life is a win. I understand how hard this feels but you're doing the best you can and that's enough for now. I hope you can get the help you need and if you ever want to chat send me a pm.

youll never walk alone it · « **Reply #6039 on:** October 4, 2016, 03:27:41 pm »

thoughts are with everybody struggling with this horrible thing.