Author Topic: Work's Christmas Party (Read 42489 times)

Navas · « **Reply #1 on:** December 9, 2009, 12:23:10 pm »

Don't go to work parties as I do not like the majority of the people I work with so I don't see the point. However, a few years ago I did go to one, and ended up getting covered in sick by the guy sitting beside me and called all my managers useless pricks.

Chivasino · « **Reply #2 on:** December 9, 2009, 12:26:34 pm »

With it being the public sector, and the general level of incompetence of the person organising it, we've ended up booking a table at Bella Pasta, and paying for it ourselves! Shite.

Used to work with this right weirdo. He was greek and camp as anything. Changed his name to George Windsor and just adored the Royal Family, and hated to homosexuals, even though he clearly was one.

Anyway, at one Xmas party he took offence to a girl taking pics. He was snapped in one of them. Towards the end of the night he ran onto the dance floor, grabbed her camera, pushed her to the floor, ran to the toilets and flushed the camera down the toilet, and then legged it from the hotel. We never saw him again. Strange.

MichaelA · « **Reply #3 on:** December 9, 2009, 12:28:03 pm »

We had ours last night. I am dying a slow and horrible death today.

CHOPPER · « **Reply #4 on:** December 9, 2009, 12:30:43 pm »

Saw one of our managers get gobbed this year. Doesn't get better than that really.

Sir Capon of Debaser · « **Reply #5 on:** December 9, 2009, 12:33:59 pm »

Started drinking early with a few mates.so there's 4 of us walking from the pub into town leathered,and acting like tits when i decided it would be a good idea to somersault over a barrier on the side of the road(showing off).....

I end up in this 10ft hole,cut to fuck with my clothes all ribboned and caked in shit.

The meal was nice though

Voni · « **Reply #6 on:** December 9, 2009, 12:50:35 pm »

I'm going to the Prodigy concert on the same day as my office Xmas do so I'm unable to attend the party. Not missing much. I don't drink and am always called "queer" by the rest of the staff. The rest of the staff are larger lout men so being a sober female amongst them is something I do not enjoy.

JimmyGrunt · « **Reply #7 on:** December 9, 2009, 12:53:25 pm »

Straight into town after work on friday. Nothing will prolly happen.

BIGdavalad · « **Reply #8 on:** December 9, 2009, 01:09:22 pm »

Had our Squadron do last week, a big meal and piss up in a posh hotel down the road. Got the Regimental carol service, Christmas dinner/food fight and piss up in the NAAFI tomorrow and a Troop day out for crazy golf and a meal next week.

markay_stinkay · « **Reply #9 on:** December 9, 2009, 01:09:55 pm »

We are not having a Xmas party this year, we are having a 'New years' party instead. At the end of next month.

Only been back at the job a few weeks, so don't know why.

Anyway, the first for this firm I went to a couple of years ago I literally just spent the whole time drinking at the bar (lots of foreigners and nerds where I work so not very socialable), then towards the end of the night told the really, really, really FIT, amazing single step daughter of the MD to 'fuck off' when she asked us to dance (it was just banter which I thought she'd get but of course she didn't which has blown any chance with her despite my apologies - she is now engaged) then puked up all over my garden, bathroom and bedroom to top the night off (I'm never sick). Boss.

Few more fitties here now though, so anticipating a potential decent night next month.

AndyInVA · « **Reply #10 on:** December 10, 2009, 12:44:01 pm »

Quote from: markay_stinkay on December 9, 2009, 01:09:55 pm

We are not having a Xmas party this year, we are having a 'New years' party instead. At the end of next month. Only been back at the job a few weeks, so don't know why.

This probably means they are having an Xmas party and your getting fired after Xmas.

Mark Walters · « **Reply #11 on:** December 10, 2009, 12:56:11 pm »

Never been to a good one. Ever. This year is likely to be just as crap as ever. Last 2 years have been in Germany and even there they're shit despite the free booze. This year it's somewhere in London and, for the 1st time since I've been with the company, no partners involved. Still with only 1 bird there nothing exciting's likely to happen.

redgriffin73 · « **Reply #12 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:07:22 pm »

Ours has been cancelled for the second year running to save money. Probably just as well as I tend to get ridiculously drunk and snog someone inappropriate at them anyway.

Alan_X · « **Reply #13 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:10:41 pm »

Off to Mestizo (excellent Mexican food if you're ever in London) for a long lunch with the office then we'll see where we end up. We share the office with another firm of architects, a web design company and a graphics/branding company so we're having another Christmas do with them next week...

We've downscaled a bit this year as there's only 5 of us at the moment. Last year we went bowling in the afternoon, up Tower 42 for champagne looking out over the city, then dinner at Zetters followed by table football and Mojitos at Cafe Kick and finally a dodgy bar till about 3.00 am.

We've had a few adventures in previous years, probably the best was when we got chucked out of a gay bar and one of the guys in the office tried to pick a fight with the lesbian bouncer...

Something Else · « **Reply #14 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:11:56 pm »

mine is tonight, not planning a big one as I have lots of work that needs doing for deadlines tomorrow and early next week, will watch on as some get trashed though and realise that yes they do love the people they work with.... hugs all round.....

VintageRed74 · « **Reply #15 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:16:55 pm »

I love it when this thread comes around again, it does my head in though as i think, where did the year go ?

Anyways, all i can say is when us drug counsellors get together for our annual christmas frivolities, its a laugh a minute and a stomping evening

The order for drinks is as follows:

a pint of staropramen, twelve cokes and six lemonades, no prizes for guessing who the beer is for

pistol · « **Reply #16 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:25:37 pm »

Quote from: Alan_F on December 10, 2009, 01:10:41 pm

Off to Mestizo (excellent Mexican food if you're ever in London) for a long lunch with the office then we'll see where we end up. We share the office with another firm of architects, a web design company and a graphics/branding company so we're having another Christmas do with them next week...

We've downscaled a bit this year as there's only 5 of us at the moment. Last year we went bowling in the afternoon, up Tower 42 for champagne looking out over the city, then dinner at Zetters followed by table football and Mojitos at Cafe Kick and finally a dodgy bar till about 3.00 am.

We've had a few adventures in previous years, probably the best was when we got chucked out of a gay bar and one of the guys in the office tried to pick a fight with the lesbian bouncer...

Can I come and work for you?

conman · « **Reply #17 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:41:09 pm »

Off to another city in Ireland,
700 or so staff have been invited + our wives & girlfriends ( i should say 'or', we are not Tiger Woods ya know),
All the hotels have been booked out in that city for us,
We are all expected to wear Tuxedo's and Ballgowns,
There then is a reception awaiting in the biggest glossiest hotel,
Free wine, Chambagne, beer, finger food awaits us in the Foyer,
The there is a free Poker tournament with cash prizes,
A 5 course meal is next with Chocolate Fountains adourning the hallway,
Followed by a well (ish) known DJ and Band if it was anything like last year.
When we fall over and are unable to crawl back on our chairs its time to go back to our designated hotels, 4am,5am,6am whatever

and all of this is Free..
we pay for the petrol to take us to our hotel, thats it

was fairly similar last year, id imagine there are a few small surprises, like last year they flew in 2 Cuban Cigar rollers to roll us all a Cigar, and 2 Tarot readers mostly for the gals, There was a Harpist playing in the foyer too

oh well, cant wait till saturday

Hulting · « **Reply #18 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:44:22 pm »

we have the Christmas party tomorrow =) but only two free beer

GinKop · « **Reply #19 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:45:37 pm »

Dinner at Hotel Du Vin in Brum, then I'm taking the intern to Gatecrasher after so me and him can go bag some beaches (basically an extension of his training where he observes me in action).

Hulting · « **Reply #20 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:48:15 pm »

Quote from: conman on December 10, 2009, 01:41:09 pm

Off to another city in Ireland,
700 or so staff have been invited + our wives & girlfriends ( i should say 'or', we are not Tiger Woods ya know),
All the hotels have been booked out in that city,
We are all expected to wear Tuxedo's and Ballgowns,
There then is a reception awaiting in the biggest glossiest hotel,
Free wine, Chambagne, beer, finger food awaits us in the Foyer,
The there is a free Poker tournament with cash prizes,
A 5 course meal is next with Chocolate Fountains adourning the hallway,
Followed by a well (ish) known DJ and Band if it was anything like last year.
When we fall over and are unable to crawl back on our chairs its time to go back to our designated hotels, 4am,5am,6am whatever

and all of this is Free..
we pay for the petrol to take us to our hotel, thats it

was fairly similar last year, id imagine there are a few small surprises, like last year they flew in 2 Cuban Cigar rollers to roll us all a Cigar, and 2 Tarot readers mostly for the gals, There was a Harpist playing in the foyer too

oh well, cant wait till saturday

All for free... nice benefit =)

Rusty Oysterburger · « **Reply #21 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:49:22 pm »

I work in the NHS so we have to stump up for own party, harumph.

Last year was ok, I was the only fella in the office at that time so I was out with 9 women. We all went around town getting leathered and the usually really quiet girl kept asking me how big my knob was over and over. Then we got thrown out of a Chinese restaurant at the end of the night because one of the women started shouting in a 'comedy' chinese accent, "Ah so, we wanta some food mister ching chong chinaman"

red_lfc_costello · « **Reply #22 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:54:18 pm »

Quote from: Alan_F on December 10, 2009, 01:10:41 pm

table football and Mojitos at Cafe Kick

went there for my girlfriends birthday, cool place!! also went to the drunken monkey just down the road!

Taking the lads go karting then for a few beers this year!!

Ciara (with a capital "C") · « **Reply #23 on:** December 10, 2009, 01:59:27 pm »

I was on placement from Uni last year, in IT. I am going to their xmas party on Friday night and my own part-time work's xmas party on Saturday night. I am working 9am Saturday morning and all day Sunday. I shall be in a permanent mess this weekend.

walshys_mullet · « **Reply #24 on:** December 10, 2009, 02:31:16 pm »

Had ours last week in Alma de Cuba (sp?) weird medieval place. Food was good and the bar was free and the usual chit chatting in work.

Afterwards though me and the wife went our own way and met her sisters and mates in Lloyds bar.

Just me and 11 young women for the rest of the night

NatD · « **Reply #25 on:** December 10, 2009, 03:01:28 pm »

Have had some good ones in the past - Barcelona, Dublin, but last year was a crap meal during the day, and this year is nothing!!!!

Gutted, last year we were supposed to go to Finland and do the whole skidoo / snow mobile advernture thing, but as the arse feel out of the Construction market, they knocked that on the head!!!!!

I get on really well with all the guys in my team, and we always have a good do when we are out, so am a bit gutted yet again we won't be having one!!!!!

exiledintheUSA · « **Reply #26 on:** December 10, 2009, 03:40:07 pm »

Fooking cancelled, due to the economy. It would have been cheesy and American though.

We used to have some manic Chrimbo do's when I was in the RAF. The best of which was probably the Christmas of 99, had a top table (dress uniform) that started at lunch and went on long until the evening, at which point 7 of us younger, single lads thought it would be a great idea to head over to Amsterdam for 3-4 days, this was Dec 23rd.

Pissed as farts, we went and stuffed some clothes into a bag, got to the train station, train to London Luton Airport, more beer, sat at the airport for hours, finally get 7 seats on two different flights.

We all got together in Schipol post flights, by this time it was 3.30pm on Chrimbo Eve, no hotels, no hostels, no nothing, bags in airport lockers, straight out on it, two days solid, only showers we got were in the red light district - nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

By the time I got home I slept for 14 hours solid! It was a great few days and funny what you decide to do off the cuff when you are drunk, ten years later and we have all moved on to differing things yet the stories still pop up on Facebook every few months. Class times.

TomDcs · « **Reply #27 on:** December 10, 2009, 04:09:45 pm »

Meal down allerton road and head into town for a few more beers next thursday, will probably head off early. Too many beers plus colleagues = dangerous!

bryanod · « **Reply #28 on:** December 10, 2009, 04:14:22 pm »

Not going cause they were organising some shite thing miles away, now its moved to town, bastards!!!

Jookie · « **Reply #29 on:** December 10, 2009, 05:20:11 pm »

We normally have a night out somewhere but for the 1st time our 'Xmas dinner' is a lunch out. It's at one of Michael Caines restuarants so should be pretty decent. Three course meal and wine paid for between 12 and 4. We get given the afternoon off as well. No partners allowed for the 1st time in ages - probably because it's an afternoon event. With it being in the afternoon it will probably curtail some of 'exuberance' seen at the normal Xmas do's! If it carries on after 4 it could be pretty messy though!

BIGdavalad · « **Reply #30 on:** December 10, 2009, 05:22:59 pm »

Quote from: BIGdavalad on December 9, 2009, 01:09:22 pm

Got the Regimental carol service, Christmas dinner/food fight and piss up in the NAAFI tomorrow

Just got in from this. Kicked off very early this morning and now smashed!

Happy Christmas!

Okkervil · « **Reply #31 on:** December 10, 2009, 05:23:26 pm »

Gone mine tonight. Curry and a booze up!

♠Dirty Harry♠ · « **Reply #32 on:** December 10, 2009, 05:28:16 pm »

Just heading out on a pub crawl after half day on the 23rd, will drink pints at a nice steady pace until the boss gets half jarred and begins to splash on rounds with some of that money he keeps from us due to 'recession'.

Boss - "What's your poison hired wrist? Pint?"
Me - "Double bourbon please *under my breath*... you cheap c*nt"

This will continue throughout the day/night

Then when I'm smashed I'll smoke 20-30 ciggies over the course of a few hours, lose control over my legs and put the brain to sleep. Then the gay waiter in the local bar will ask my workmates around the table about my availability whilst I'm giving my chin a shower with mouth water.

Closing time I'll crawl out into the streets, and try and work out how I'm getting home since I haven't booked a taxi.

The next 2 weeks will then consist of flashback cringes and deep fear and worry about returning to work, and hoping that someone else has made a bigger bollocks of themselves than I have. Boss has done that 2 years running.

In prior years with another company, I have dawned a cape for masquerade night, then at the end of it thinking it's superhero night I proceeded to rip the knees out of the hired tux. Year before was playing bongos on my line managers tits (whose wedding I also crashed) lucky for me she was transferred in the new year to another office.

pascoli · « **Reply #33 on:** December 10, 2009, 05:37:59 pm »

When living in Dublin i ended up going out with a gorgeous Irish lass i worked with.

The only slight issue was her dads absolute hatred for all things english.

After maybe 6 months i was allowed into the house, so to be invited over for xmas dinner, and also being told i could stay in their house after our works party was surprising.

Aftershocks at the xmas party ruined it all for me.

I apparantly woke up about 3 in the morning (Just about the time her taxi driver dad came ini and had a cup of tea in the living room) and started to head up to the toilet for a burst. Bollocko.

For one reason or another i decided i did not want to wait until i got to the toilet, so i just turned around and pissed all over the newly carpeted stairs. Her dad must have heard the splattering of piss, so obviously came out of the living room to investigate. I can only assume i heed it in at this stage, as he apparantly then led me back to the bedroom and told me to "fucking get dressed and stay in there" and all that without me even pissing on him.

It is at this stage my decision making became even worse. Upset at offending her dad, i decided to go and iron things out with him, by going back into the living room, sitting next to him on the couch and talking it over. Bollocko.

I ended up spending xmas day having dinner alone, and was barred for around 6 months from her house.

When i did go back, the first thing i noticed was the different colour carpet covering the last 6 or 7 steps where they had replaced the pissy bit.

We split up not long after.

Fuck Christmas parties RIGHT OFF

AlphaDelta · « **Reply #34 on:** December 10, 2009, 05:39:55 pm »

Our watch xmas weekend is to York which is a great venue, like me - the rest of the lads are all for doing a pub crawl of nice, quite, real ale pubs with nice comfortable chairs and roaring log fires! Then contiune into the night with some lively places (those who want to go back the hotel can do)
On a side note, we have the footy lads xmas night out (five-a-side lads), plus a few office parties that my mates smuggle me into!

Bah humbug!

Ben S · « **Reply #35 on:** December 10, 2009, 06:09:36 pm »

Had mine on Friday at the Alicia hotel by sefton park. Left at about 5 and was gutted there was no kebab shops open

Songs to Sing · « **Reply #36 on:** December 10, 2009, 06:27:12 pm »

Quote from: conman on December 10, 2009, 01:41:09 pm

Off to another city in Ireland,
700 or so staff have been invited + our wives & girlfriends ( i should say 'or', we are not Tiger Woods ya know),
All the hotels have been booked out in that city for us,
We are all expected to wear Tuxedo's and Ballgowns,
There then is a reception awaiting in the biggest glossiest hotel,
Free wine, Chambagne, beer, finger food awaits us in the Foyer,
The there is a free Poker tournament with cash prizes,
A 5 course meal is next with Chocolate Fountains adourning the hallway,
Followed by a well (ish) known DJ and Band if it was anything like last year.
When we fall over and are unable to crawl back on our chairs its time to go back to our designated hotels, 4am,5am,6am whatever

and all of this is Free..
we pay for the petrol to take us to our hotel, thats it

was fairly similar last year, id imagine there are a few small surprises, like last year they flew in 2 Cuban Cigar rollers to roll us all a Cigar, and 2 Tarot readers mostly for the gals, There was a Harpist playing in the foyer too

oh well, cant wait till saturday

where do you work?

Chakan · « **Reply #37 on:** December 10, 2009, 06:32:27 pm »

Going to the Marriotte Executive Suites for dinner and drinks.

First year at the company so thought I would make an impression by going. Bird canceled on me so am scrambling to find a suitable replacement.

nyctex · « **Reply #38 on:** December 10, 2009, 06:33:42 pm »

NOTHING good can happen at a work Christmas party.

One of mine is tonight - I'll try to skip out as quickly as socially acceptable. And finish getting plastered with some old friends before I go home and annoy the wife.

KERRYKOP · « **Reply #39 on:** December 10, 2009, 06:39:08 pm »

Quote from: conman on December 10, 2009, 01:41:09 pm

Off to another city in Ireland,
700 or so staff have been invited + our wives & girlfriends ( i should say 'or', we are not Tiger Woods ya know),
All the hotels have been booked out in that city for us,
We are all expected to wear Tuxedo's and Ballgowns,
There then is a reception awaiting in the biggest glossiest hotel,
Free wine, Chambagne, beer, finger food awaits us in the Foyer,
The there is a free Poker tournament with cash prizes,
A 5 course meal is next with Chocolate Fountains adourning the hallway,
Followed by a well (ish) known DJ and Band if it was anything like last year.
When we fall over and are unable to crawl back on our chairs its time to go back to our designated hotels, 4am,5am,6am whatever

and all of this is Free..
we pay for the petrol to take us to our hotel, thats it

was fairly similar last year, id imagine there are a few small surprises, like last year they flew in 2 Cuban Cigar rollers to roll us all a Cigar, and 2 Tarot readers mostly for the gals, There was a Harpist playing in the foyer too

oh well, cant wait till saturday

So which bank do you work for?