Topic: What is the stupidest/lamest reason your partner/ex has fallen out with you for?

[lfctitch]

My missus constantly asks me if I've done certain things with other people before I met her. I tell her the truth and she goes off on one. If you dont like hearing about my past, then why ask? And even if I was to lie to tell her what she wants to hear, she'd go off on one about that! Cant win with them but we love having 'em round I guess 

Yeah it wasn't that. It was the fact you told her you had stuck your end up a sheep. I mean I can sort of understand where shes coming from

[scatman]

LOL!

my mates girlfriend just broke up with him, she "thinks" she's a lesbian...gutted

[And Could He Play]

LOL!

my mates girlfriend just broke up with him, she "thinks" she's a lesbian...gutted

He needs to make her prove it.

[Chaztastic]

For not being chatty at 5 in the morning. After 3 hours sleep. Mad fuck.

[scatman]

He needs to make her prove it.

think he cant be arsed, he's been with her for years

[Cookie-7-]

think he cant be arsed, he's been with her for years

and NOW she thinks she might be a rug muncher?! Jeez.

There's must be an open-halfway-house here where everyone's happy.  Invite one of her better looking mates round for an experiment

[scatman]

ive seen her mates, and honestly i would double bag, that's her included.

[Cookie-7-]

In that case, I'd fuck her off,soon after, .the fucking idiot......

[♠Dirty Harry♠]

My bird has been getting on my back recently about commitment issues and that I need to show her a sign of how committed I was to her, her suggestion? A tattoo of her name.

I said fuck that, laughing as you do, but it went down like a lead balloon. She was fucking serious and wouldn't speak to me for ages.

A fucking tattoo?! At least you can taking a fucking engagement/wedding ring off. Or the other solution I came up with was getting "I love pussy"  tattooed on my wrist in a foreign language and telling her it was her name.

[JimmyGrunt]

My bird has been getting on my back recently about commitment issues and that I need to show her a sign of how committed I was to her, her suggestion? A tattoo of her name.

I said fuck that, laughing as you do, but it went down like a lead balloon. She was fucking serious and wouldn't speak to me for ages.

Jebus!   

[Wigwamdelbert]

My bird has been getting on my back recently about commitment issues and that I need to show her a sign of how committed I was to her, her suggestion? A tattoo of her name.

I said fuck that, laughing as you do, but it went down like a lead balloon. She was fucking serious and wouldn't speak to me for ages.

A fucking tattoo?! At least you can taking a fucking engagement/wedding ring off. Or the other solution I came up with was getting "I love pussy"  tattooed on my wrist in a foreign language and telling her it was her name.

Visions of Mrs Dirty currently posting on RAWS (red and white shoes)

"So I told him to get a tattoo of my name, soon as he gets it done, I'm going to fuck him off soon after, the fucking idiot"

[scatman]

mate i would never get that tattoo done, though i like the idea of the other tattoo

[Corkboy]

My bird has been getting on my back recently about commitment issues and that I need to show her a sign of how committed I was to her, her suggestion? A tattoo of her name.

I said fuck that, laughing as you do, but it went down like a lead balloon. She was fucking serious and wouldn't speak to me for ages.

A fucking tattoo?! At least you can taking a fucking engagement/wedding ring off. Or the other solution I came up with was getting "I love pussy"  tattooed on my wrist in a foreign language and telling her it was her name.

Tell her fine, but she goes first.

Then...

fuck her off,soon after, .the fucking idiot......

[♠Dirty Harry♠]

Jebus!   

I know I have commitment issues, like the last day in M&S I picked up a Ham & Mustard Sandwich but by the time I got to the till the New York Pastrami & Pickle one had won me over.

Needless to say, I fucked the Ham and Mustard one off soon after, the fucking Idiot.

[wardides]

Been with the same bird now for 2 and a half years..Both 18(19 in a few weeks)..Both going into our first year of college and basically have just kinda drifted apart..shes annoying as fuck lately as all she talks about is college..She is up there for the week on campus and on thursday she text me saying how she dosnt like how we have drifted apart blah blah blah and that we havnt had much time alone to be us and we need it because we can get back to the way we were..All that kind of shit..Anyway so she goes on to say we should go out sat on a date as we havnt had a proper one in a while(not minding the weekend away we had a month ago)..Now maybe it was me being pissed off and slightly intoxicated with the lads my response was.."if you want a date on saturday go get cilla black and organise one because im watching the ireland match"..seemed witty at the time..anyway moral of the story i want to just fuck her off but i know once i do that ill want her back..load of balls!

[♠Dirty Harry♠]

anyway moral of the story i want to just fuck her off but i know once i do that ill want her back..load of balls!

No harm sounds like you being a Selfish c*nt, just bin her and stop looking after yourself.

[wardides]

No harm sounds like you being a Selfish c*nt, just bin her and stop looking after yourself.

not really just got tired of bein the one at the beck and call.. booked a holiday away for her 18th birthday a couple of months back and she said she couldnt go as she couldnt afford it..then a week later she says shes going to new york with one of her mates..I still love her but im sick of having to be the one who does everything and have to drop everything when she wants to do something

[waittillmay]

Been with the same bird now for 2 and a half years..Both 18(19 in a few weeks)..Both going into our first year of college and basically have just kinda drifted apart..shes annoying as fuck lately as all she talks about is college..She is up there for the week on campus and on thursday she text me saying how she dosnt like how we have drifted apart blah blah blah and that we havnt had much time alone to be us and we need it because we can get back to the way we were..All that kind of shit..Anyway so she goes on to say we should go out sat on a date as we havnt had a proper one in a while(not minding the weekend away we had a month ago)..Now maybe it was me being pissed off and slightly intoxicated with the lads my response was.."if you want a date on saturday go get cilla black and organise one because im watching the ireland match"..seemed witty at the time..anyway moral of the story i want to just fuck her off but i know once i do that ill want her back..load of balls!

18 is WAAAAAY too young to be going out with someone for over 2 years. ridiculous infact.

[wardides]

18 is WAAAAAY too young to be going out with someone for over 2 years. ridiculous infact.

Is exactly what ill be saying in 10 or 20 years time to some young 18 year old nipper whos with someone for 2 years...ah heindsights a great thing but sure you live and learn..and i wouldnt say its been bad..To be honest the last two years probably would have been a bit shitter if i wasnt with her so..

[scatman]

mate your saying that they probably would have been shitter, but your not to know, you could have been banging around in that time.

[waittillmay]

yeah no way of knowing if it'd be better or worse.
I just remember some of the shit my mates put up with and some of the boss times they missed out on by being in relationships when they were that age, every weekend sitting in their fellas bedroom with their parents downstairs...constant fighting and in the end the big heartbreaking breakup only for them to realise a few years later what a complete waste of time it'd all been.

but then again, i also have mates who are still with the same fellas they had at 15 *shudder*

[El Denzel Pepito]

girls are fucking pointless. no matter what you do for them they fucking question you or get something to argue with you about. c*nts. all of them. the lot.

[wardides]

yeah no way of knowing if it'd be better or worse.
I just remember some of the shit my mates put up with and some of the boss times they missed out on by being in relationships when they were that age, every weekend sitting in their fellas bedroom with their parents downstairs...constant fighting and in the end the big heartbreaking breakup only for them to realise a few years later what a complete waste of time it'd all been.

but then again, i also have mates who are still with the same fellas they had at 15 *shudder*

ye i have mates like that..but honestly hasnt been that bad..still play poker with the lads every friday night..go out with them every 2nd thursday say after our weekly 5 a side..so its not all bad compared to some of my mates who have literally dropped off the face of the earth since theyve had birds...Like jamie redknapp style literally!

[And Could He Play]

girls are fucking pointless. no matter what you do for them they fucking question you or get something to argue with you about. c*nts. all of them. the lot.

You just realised that mate, Devils toy they are.

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

[El Denzel Pepito]

You just realised that mate, Devils toy they are.

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

agreed. no matter what we do for them, theres always something missing for them. they always have to be right, no matter what, even if it doesnt make sense.

[finchy1972]

I was walking round lake windermere a few years ago with a girl who is now my ex , after about 10mins we came across a small blackboard which read ' ferry rides across the water only £2.50 ' after thinking for a minute the ex girlfriend said with a straight face 'thats really cheap to get to France don't you think !!'
Christ i nearly died laughing on the spot , she din't speak to me for the rest of the morning.

[wardides]

and were done...dont really know what to feel now?

[Welshred]

and were done...dont really know what to feel now?

You know the scene at the end of Free Willy where Willy finally gets freed? Well, get someone to spray some water over your head and you should feel just as happy as that little whale did! You have your life back sir, and now you must live it. What I'm saying, pretty much, is that you're in college now so go find a few college girls to nail and have on your every shout

[♠Dirty Harry♠]

and were done...dont really know what to feel now?

You know the scene at the end of Free Willy where Willy finally gets freed? Well, get someone to spray some water over your head and you should feel just as happy as that little whale did! You have your life back sir, and now you must live it. What I'm saying, pretty much, is that you're in college now so go find a few college girls to nail and have on your every shout

What he said, you are now in the perfect place to be single, plus not fair on either of you being in a relationship if you are not happy.

[wardides]

You know the scene at the end of Free Willy where Willy finally gets freed? Well, get someone to spray some water over your head and you should feel just as happy as that little whale did! You have your life back sir, and now you must live it. What I'm saying, pretty much, is that you're in college now so go find a few college girls to nail and have on your every shout

youve basically said all of what im thinking but didnt want to say...and for that i thank you!

[Mouth]

youve basically said all of what im thinking but didnt want to say...and for that i thank you!

Right, now giz your ex's number so we can give her a sympathy shag after some bastard just dumped her.

[macca888]

Been with the same bird now for 2 and a half years..Both 18(19 in a few weeks)..Both going into our first year of college and basically have just kinda drifted apart..shes annoying as fuck lately as all she talks about is college..She is up there for the week on campus and on thursday she text me saying how she dosnt like how we have drifted apart blah blah blah and that we havnt had much time alone to be us and we need it because we can get back to the way we were..All that kind of shit..Anyway so she goes on to say we should go out sat on a date as we havnt had a proper one in a while(not minding the weekend away we had a month ago)..Now maybe it was me being pissed off and slightly intoxicated with the lads my response was.."if you want a date on saturday go get cilla black and organise one because im watching the ireland match"..seemed witty at the time..anyway moral of the story i want to just fuck her off but i know once i do that ill want her back..load of balls!

2 fucking years?     Fucking hell, at that age, a bird was lucky to get 2 days out of me. Keep her fucked off, you fucking idiot. All that "I'll get shut, but I'll want her back" is just because you're worried you'll never get your end way again if you give up a sure thing. You will, trust me. You'll be nostrils deep in minge pie in college, you daft twat.

[SP]

You know the scene at the end of Free Willy where Willy finally gets freed?

The real life bit where the Killer Whale was released and died shortly afterwards?

[scatman]

Right, now giz your ex's number so we can give her a sympathy shag after some bastard just dumped her.

LOL!

im in the same boat as u macca, was lucky to keep a girl for a night haha

[Welshred]

The real life bit where the Killer Whale was released and died shortly afterwards?

yeh that bit!

[liverbird_soph]

My sister is a vegetarian and is very annoying when you are eating meat. It has wound her boyfriend up for ages and he's always telling her to shut up about it and respect the fact that he's a meat eater. It seems she wasn't amused when he finally had enough and got her back by putting slices of ham between the pages of her magazine. Especially as she only found the ham when she started reading her magazine on a busy train journey.

He's now getting the silent treatment and it doesn't look good for a reconciliation. My sister is also annoyed at me for finding it quite funny and not thinking it makes him an arsehole.

[macca888]

My sister is a vegetarian and is very annoying when you are eating meat. It has wound her boyfriend up for ages and he's always telling her to shut up about it and respect the fact that he's a meat eater. It seems she wasn't amused when he finally had enough and got her back by putting slices of ham between the pages of her magazine. Especially as she only found the ham when she started reading her magazine on a busy train journey.

He's now getting the silent treatment and it doesn't look good for a reconciliation. My sister is also annoyed at me for finding it quite funny and not thinking it makes him an arsehole.

So your sister's boyfriend gets wound up because she won't eat meat? Yeah, I could see why that would happen.

[liverbird_soph]

So your sister's boyfriend gets wound up because she won't eat meat? Yeah, I could see why that would happen.

No, because of her reaction whenever he or any of us eats it.

Guess you'd have to see what she does to get the rest of the story. whoops - nothing to see here. Moving on....

[Mouth]

So your sister's boyfriend gets wound up because she won't eat meat? Yeah, I could see why that would happen.

He would probably be perfectly happy if she would only taste it every now and again.

[liverbird_soph]

I can't believe I just totally missed that joke until your post Mouth. Oh dear.