God this is a punishingly slow and painful death...
13mins - Bournemouth have gone home. Utd kicked off anyway. Still 0-0 as Smalling passes it back to De Gea.
We may sign Salah, but I'll show my arse in the middle of town if we sign one of VVD or Keita. Not gonna happen.
I'm literally shitting my knickers!
Stoke have won twice already on pens in the League Cup - Knocking out both Chelsea and Luton Town.
I'd rather have my piles lanced with a butter knife than watch this...And even if we win, I can't be excited because we've been so awful
Misses. Can hits post. Still 1-1
Lucas has to score...