Topic: Plausible lies

[The Gulleysucker]

Ok, in a counter to the 'well I never knew that' thread, this is a bit of an experiment.

The idea is to spin short yarns that seem, as the thread title suggests, thoroughly plausible, and that could thus then possibly spread over time and start to become treated as fact, which will be the interesting bit.

Nothing outrageous, NSFW or libellous please, just throwaway but curious stuff, ie little lies, things you could comfortably say in conversation that are 'possible', and plausible obviously, and that don't require the stretching of anyones incredulity too far...so no Inbetweeners Jay level stuff please.

So I'll start..


In January 2009, while still a teenager and before she became Internationally famous, Miley Cyrus came to the UK to stay with a Family in Crosby under an Anglo-US School exchange student scheme for 6 months and while here, she had a temporary Saturday job working at the McNasty's on Moor Lane.

[ToneLa]

Hitler played the tuba when he was a student, not for long, but he was fairly good.

[Andy @ Allerton!]

Donald J. Trump learned his business acumen by attending a course on burger management. He employed this knowledge into a promising career at McNasty's before being headhunted by Burger King. He was known as the master Burger Maker and used to draw thousands of adoring fast-food workers into his speeches. As time went on, more and more people flocked to his cause of being the best Burger Maker there was. In a famous interview in Time magazine, when asked about his success making fantastic burgers, fries and condiment mixes, he modestly said "It would take an hour-and-a-half to learn everything there is to learn about burgers. I think I know most of it anyway. You're talking about just getting updated on a situation". He was made President of the "I'm a Burger Dude" fanclub where little orange headed grinning Trumps were issued making a burger. They sold like hot cakes. On hearing this, Trump went on to form the "Trump Hot Cake Plaza" and built a gleaming hotel on the site. Later he recalled. "I loved being called President and after a few months, it dawned on me that making burgers and condiments and serving the American people is exactly the same as being President of the US and serving American People".

And a star was born.

[Jake]

Liverpool FC have a £200m warchest and they're going to sign world class players.

[Mr Grieves]

Liverpool FC have a £200m warchest and they're going to sign world class players.

Put some effort in , that's definite bulshit

[El Lobo]

Fucking hell a throwaway thread in the Boozer becomes an anti-FSG thread

Oh sorry, thought this was the small things that annoy you thread

[The Gulleysucker]

The famous Physicist, Ernest Rutherford, was also well known as a keen and legendary Eroticist and by the time of his death, had amassed one of the largest private collections of Erotic art ever here in the UK.

On his death, it was bequeathed to the Scottish National Gallery in Edinburgh though because of much of the subject matter apparently vividly portrayed, it has never been put on Public display for fear of outraging sensibilities.

In order to see these pictures, you must send an email to enquiries@nationalgalleries.org requesting to view what is known as The Rutherford Collection and they will then arrange a day for you to go and peruse them in a private viewing area.

[The Gulleysucker]

The Welsh language has neither pronouns or adjectives.

[The Gulleysucker]

The word wade as in to wade a stream is quite a recent addition in the English language and comes from General Wade, he who suppressed the Jacobite rebellions.

In order to delay the advance of the English army, during their retreat the Jacobite rebels dismantled many of the bridges over the rivers and streams throughout the Highlands, however Wade instructed his men to simply walk through them at their shallow parts, hence to wade...

[CraigDS]

There are 29 different words in the Russian dictionary for gullible.

[Jake]

Fucking hell a throwaway thread in the Boozer becomes an anti-FSG thread

Oh sorry, thought this was the small things that annoy you thread

Check my previous posts mate I'm pro FSG

[The Gulleysucker]

Right up to his death, George Washington would stand to attention and raise a toast to a portrait of the King each evening at supper time.

[CraigDS]

Check my previous posts mate I'm pro FSG

Plausible lie? 


During filming, Jonny Depp will wear the same pair of underwear, unwashed, until the filming ends due to a long standing superstition that if he changed them he'd lose the ability to recreate that character.

[The Gulleysucker]

After Waterloo and when in exile on St Helena until his death, Napoleon exchanged monthly letters of correspondence with Wellington discussing in some detail a wide range of non-military things such as the weather, horse racing and the latest womens fashion.

These letters are held in the Musée de l'Armée at Les Invalides in Paris.

[The Gulleysucker]

Gwyneth Paltrow is a fanatical ornithologist and has been known to interrupt her filming schedules in order to enable her to go and spot rare birds around the world when they are sighted.

She is known to have turned up unannounced and incognito at a spotting of a rare visitor, the Melodious Warbler, at Marazion Marsh in Cornwall late last August.

[CrasherKid79]

Blind people can't feel rain

[gazzam1963]

Bob Holness of blockbusters fame played the saxophone on Gerry Rafferteys baker street , this is a very well known plausible lie ( urban myth ) Which is that plausible if you put bob Holness in google the second prediction is bob holness baker street . Apparently he dislikes this which became more apparent when Tony Snell ( radio mersyside presenter ) was going to have a telephone interview with him , Snelly mentioned to someone that he was going to interview him and was told about the saxophone piece .

Snelly had never heard this before but took it at face value , so he opens the interview welcoming him onto the show and says before we start to talk about the reason your here Bob I just want to touch on about your involvement in baker street ....next second the phone is slammed down

[rob1966]

When a young Adolf Hitler lived in Toxteth during the winter of 1912/13, while he used to enjoy drawing and watching the ships, he also found a liking for football. He used to frequently visit both Liverpool and Everton, as a lot of people did in those days, although his preferred team was Liverpool.

[Kopite B205]

I once bought a blankety blank cheque book and pen at Edge Lane car booty for 50p.

[RedRabbit]

Felix Baumgartner, the Austrian BASE jumper, who holds the record for the highest skydiving jump at 39km has been twarted in his attempt to break his own record due to health and safety concerns. Insurance companies will not sign off on the attempt because of H&S stipulations that any attempt to jump over the 40km mark must include a barrier on the platform that can only be removed just before the jump is attempted. Unfortunately, at those heights any barrier that would prevent him from falling prematurely at those heights will freeze in the sub zero temperatures of the upper atmosphere. This leads to the record being unbreakable until a new antifreeze material can be designed, something Baumgartner doesn't expect to see in his lifetime.

[The Gulleysucker]

As a child, Arsene Wenger was apparently once considered a potential music prodigy and aged 14, he is said to have studied the Viola for a year under the tutelage of the great Lionel Tertis.

It is claimed that Arsene still practices the Viola regularly in periods of relaxation, his party piece being a particularly melancholic interpretation of Sergei Prokofiev's Romeo and Juliet, and it is also said that he is an occasional member of the North London Symphony Orchestra when time permits.

[Buck Pete]

Builders, renovating the kitchen at an ex-footballer turned pundit South London home, discovered several multi-packs of Golden Wonder crisps in his cupboard.

To avoid media embarrassment, The nameless ex player/pundit reportedly hired a VIP executive box at Wembley for the FA Cup final for the team of builders to secure their continued silence.

[So… Howard Philips]

After Waterloo and when in exile on St Helena until his death, Napoleon exchanged monthly letters of correspondence with Wellington discussing in some detail a wide range of non-military things such as the weather, horse racing and the latest womens fashion.

These letters are held in the Musée de l'Armée at Les Invalides in Paris.

Isn't there some truth in this?

I know Wellington "inherited" one of Napoleon's mistresses after Waterloo.

[reniformis]

Sunglasses, designed to block out short-wave UV light that damages the retina, do not block long-wave infra red rays that cause damage to of the lens of the eye and is why people who wear sunglasses regularly usually suffer from age-related long-sightedness (presbyopia) much earlier than those who don't.

[The Gulleysucker]

Back in the 1960's, the Ford Transit was originally going to be called the Ford Jobbie until market research indicated that it mightn't sell too well in Scotland.

A panicky brain storming session subsequently came up with the idea,  it's been said perhaps due to them now having some kind of auto suggestion along the scatalogical theme, of calling it the Transit instead.

[The Gulleysucker]

Isn't there some truth in this?

I know Wellington "inherited" one of Napoleon's mistresses after Waterloo.

No idea, I simply made it up.   But plausible, certainly....

[reniformis]

In the 70's the Irish Olympic committee tried to have their country name changed to Eire for the Olympics because they didn't like being stuck between Iran, Iraq and Israel during the ceremonial parades.

[Barneylfc∗]

Felix Baumgartner, the Austrian BASE jumper, who holds the record for the highest skydiving jump at 39km has been twarted in his attempt to break his own record due to health and safety concerns. Insurance companies will not sign off on the attempt because of H&S stipulations that any attempt to jump over the 40km mark must include a barrier on the platform that can only be removed just before the jump is attempted. Unfortunately, at those heights any barrier that would prevent him from falling prematurely at those heights will freeze in the sub zero temperatures of the upper atmosphere. This leads to the record being unbreakable until a new antifreeze material can be designed, something Baumgartner doesn't expect to see in his lifetime.

That would be plausible if this jump wasn't beaten by another jump 2 years later 

[The Bournemouth Red]

It's a criminal offence to drive a dirty car in St Petersburg.

[ToneLa]

Football fans are on average less happier than those who never followed it

[jambutty]

In Widnes, it's illegal to marry your widow's sister.

[The Gulleysucker]

Before he later became a comedian, Arthur Askey was a renowned youth swimmer in Liverpool, his home town, and for a stint in the summer of 1922, he appeared at New Brighton open air baths in a show that involved him diving off the high board onto a wet sponge.

[The Gulleysucker]

Ken Dodd was a child model for Pears soap.

[Crimson_Tank]

Arsenal are a top side.

[rob1966]

Arsenal are a top side.

The thread is plausible lies 

[Lfsea]

Alanis Morrisette's real name is actually Alanismo Risette, and it was her first manager who encouraged the name tweak to something more Anglicised.

[The Gulleysucker]

Jonathan Ross was a part time PCSO for 5 years (2006-2011), working out of Clerkenwell Police Station.

[Lfsea]

Nigel Havers and Michael Jackson struck up an unlikely friendship after meeting in the Chairman's box at Fulham, during Jackson's famous visit there. They remained close until Michael's death.

[Lfsea]

Although it looked like a near-annihilation, the Luftwaffe's Blitz on London at the end of 1940 was so inefficient, that the fatalities to bombs dropped ratio has been estimated as 1:2.

[Tesco tearaway]

You can only travel to the moon at night time.
This is because you can only get through the Van Allen radiation belt on the side of the Earth that's facing away from the Sun.
The cosmic rays from the Sun hit the Earths magnetic field. This boosts the Van Allen belt, and makes it too strong to pass through during the day.
The cosmic rays don't hit the night time side of the Earth, so the belt is weak enough to get through without killing the astronauts.