Author Topic: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread  (Read 815196 times)

Offline Sir Harvest Fields

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9400 on: October 16, 2013, 05:57:51 pm »
Except in a few cases?

So its possible then for someone to do this without a higher power?
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9401 on: October 16, 2013, 06:18:05 pm »
Except in a few cases?

So its possible then for someone to do this without a higher power?
From what I have read, people can be very flexible about the higher power.
It can just be love for your family, your personal happiness, that sort of thing (not sure if that's the intention, but that's how I've read people have interpreted it).
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Offline Billy The Kid

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9402 on: October 16, 2013, 06:19:48 pm »
What is this ' higher power ' that Corkboy refers to? Is it something used at an AA meeting? Does it imply God or something. Genuine question.

Yes, the turning to a "higher power" is part of the AA recovery program. However it does not imply the existence of any god whatsoever. AA is also NOT associated with any religion whatsoever.


Yes, it's part of the AA programme.

"The alcoholic at certain times has no effective mental defense against the first drink. Except in a few cases, neither he nor any other human being can provide such a defense. His defense must come from a Higher Power."

"Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Higher_Power

Corkboy, again I respond to you with respect, but your wading in on something that you clearly know very little about. Your making a gross and ill-informed assumption that a higher power (as perceived in AA) equates to a god of some sort, that is associated with a religion of some sort. You are wrong sir. Very very wrong. You've already pointed out that you would have no business at an AA meeting. So how could you possibly be in any position to comment on what the higher power is, or is meant to be perceived as? Let alone comment on it with any degree of true understanding? Nothing you've posted from your 'copy and paste' trip to wiki even remotely backs up your claim.


I would have no business at one, I'm a stone cold atheist for a start, so they can get fucked with that higher power shit.


That's an absolute whopper of a statement. Bizarre beyond belief. And tells me you really don't know what you're talking about. I can only assume that you're of the notion that alcoholics who attend AA are religious. And that the "higher power shit" is rooted in the belief of a biblical god of some sort. I don't know if you're aware, but AA doesn't associate itself with any religion whatsoever. It never has done to the best of my knowledge. Obviously there are some members who do have religious beliefs. That's their prerogative.

But many others don't hold those kind of beliefs. I'm not religious. I don't believe in gods of any name, shape or form. I'm willing to guess there are millions of others just like me. AA isn't exclusive to god believers mate. Alcoholism is a disease that can fuck up anyone who is unfortunate enough to suffer from it. Including atheists like me. Should I get fucked also? For believing in "higher power shit'? Or are you sure this isn't a case of you talking about something that in truth, you know nothing about?

Hence I'd respectfully suggest that you perhaps think that one through again before you go dismissing an organization (that's made of people merely trying to help each other) as one that can "get fucked" with their "higher power shit". On the lame assumption that their beliefs or tools for recovery contradict your position as an atheist.  People in AA are there because they suffer from a very dangerous disease. Not because its a place of prayer or worship. I know you love a dig at religion from time to time, but AA isn't church sir. 


 
When overtaken by defeat, as you may be many times, remember than mans faith in his own ability is tested many times before he is crowned with final victory. Defeats are nothing more than challenges to keep trying.” – Napoleon Hill.

Offline Billy The Kid

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9403 on: October 16, 2013, 06:24:50 pm »
From what I have read, people can be very flexible about the higher power.
It can just be love for your family, your personal happiness, that sort of thing (not sure if that's the intention, but that's how I've read people have interpreted it).

Correct

For me, the "power greater than" is the sober me. The "myself" part is the addict in me.

So in other words, the sober me is a higher power than the addict me

Notice I didn't mention god once. Or religion for that matter
When overtaken by defeat, as you may be many times, remember than mans faith in his own ability is tested many times before he is crowned with final victory. Defeats are nothing more than challenges to keep trying.” – Napoleon Hill.

Offline Billy The Kid

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9404 on: October 16, 2013, 06:58:05 pm »
You hold a lot of faith in AA Billy , and that has worked for countless people and will continue to do so. Other methods will work for others. To discount any other method is unfair. Its about finding what works for certain individuals and their current circumstances and there relationship with alcohol.

To tell you the truth Carl. I haven't been to AA in quiet a while. I took the recovery tools that they offer, and applied them on my own. Others prefer to attend regularly as it helps them to maintain their recovery. So yes, you are indeed correct. Different methods work for different people. I certainly don't discount other methods, so long as they work and help maintain sobriety. And that is the key point. Being able to maintain it

There are a lot of recovering addicts like me who are not regular attendee's of AA. You don't have to attend regularly in order to fully understand this disease. You can gain a lot of insight from simply reading, or just talking to others who are in recovery. A quick look back at ones time of excessive usage will also bring a wealth of further understanding. If you revise your behavior and actions throughout your time of usage, you will notice that it is glaringly apparent that this disease has a plethora of common and reoccurring traits amongst the majority of sufferers

Which leads me back to my initial astonishment at some of the phrases being branded about in here. Especially ones like "no certainties about anything". Whilst it may be true that there are exceptions to the rule from time to time, the overwhelming amount of evidence on the contrary, would strongly suggest that that is a dangerously flippant statement to make. Especially when said in reference to a disease as perilous as alcoholism. And the reason I use the word dangerous, is because of the overwhelming number of tragic cases where people have reverted to old habits, and ended up destroying their lives because of the cunning nature of this addiction. Sure, there may be no certainties, but alcoholism isn't something you want to take a risk with, is it? Considering the well known, and often tragic dangers of it. Which if you check in detail, are worryingly common

Its a bit like putting Gary Glitter in a kids pool unsupervised, and trying to reassure them that he wont fuck one of them, on the basis that there are no certainties in life. I mean, I wouldn't be inclined to jump in the pool and take the risk. In much the same way I wouldn't trust myself with a drink in my hand. If you catch my drift?
When overtaken by defeat, as you may be many times, remember than mans faith in his own ability is tested many times before he is crowned with final victory. Defeats are nothing more than challenges to keep trying.” – Napoleon Hill.

Offline Sir Harvest Fields

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9405 on: October 16, 2013, 07:09:00 pm »
Indeed i do Billy, and that was a great post. I dont think anyone is taking this disease flippantly but i totally understand your concerns. It is a massive risk to keep drinking and think i/we have it under control as it is not that simple. I also understand the evidence that you offer supports your fears and arguments and i respect that. What i must say is that things change, mental states, lifestyles,priorities etc that can help someone lead a more ' normal ' association with alcohol. Get out of the mindset that made one think they needed that drink both physically and mentally.
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9406 on: October 16, 2013, 07:48:51 pm »
What i must say is that things change, mental states, lifestyles,priorities etc that can help someone lead a more ' normal ' association with alcohol. Get out of the mindset that made one think they needed that drink both physically and mentally.

For me this is the danger though. You're relying on stability in the rest of your life to prop up your control of your alcohol. The sad fact is that life has a habit of throwing you curveballs through no fault of your own. Even where they have no problem whatsoever with alcohol people lose jobs or get ill, relationships break down etc etc. Do you think you could continue to drink safely if your current stable situation was to change in some way?

Andy is in the same boat and has even said explicitly that he fears that when his daughter leaves home his alcohol use will escalate.

It may be being co-opted by the Tories recently but the old JFK quote "The time to fix the roof is when the sun is shining" seems quite appropriate here.

Offline Corkboy

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9407 on: October 16, 2013, 09:03:13 pm »
Yes, the turning to a "higher power" is part of the AA recovery program. However it does not imply the existence of any god whatsoever. AA is also NOT associated with any religion whatsoever.

Corkboy, again I respond to you with respect, but your wading in on something that you clearly know very little about. Your making a gross and ill-informed assumption that a higher power (as perceived in AA) equates to a god of some sort, that is associated with a religion of some sort.

I'm not. I realise many people do look for a god as a higher power but many don't. It clearly is a reference to something supernatural ("nor any other human being") but I know people use it their own way. There are pages and pages on the web of agnostics and atheists discussing the efficacy of AA and the concept of higher power. I don't understand the concept of a higher power at all, it just doesn't work for me. If it works for you and your sober self being the higher power, fine. There is no such thing as a second you, but as I said if it works for you, great. Not for me, though. Being hyper rational will do that to you. I simply cannot conceive of a higher power, in any form.

I also don't agree with the concept of a higher power in AA because of what it stands for. I don't agree with the statement I copypasted off wiki because it seems like victim bullshit to me. Nobody is powerless. I don't like the concept of handing over your will and accepting powerlessness. Alcoholism is a behavioural disorder, I don't think it's helpful to characterise recovery in those terms.

But for what it's worth, I regret my choice of words. My opinions on AA are entirely personal and if it works for other people, then I shouldn't tell them to get fucked. Sorry.

Offline Sir Harvest Fields

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9408 on: October 18, 2013, 07:15:29 pm »
Just to say, ive got engaged to my girlfriend. Seemed the right thing to do. We can change...
"Woe to you, Oh Earth and Sea, for the Devil sends the beast with wrath, because he knows the time is short...Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast for it is a human number, its number is Six hundred and sixty six."

Offline Red Genius

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9409 on: October 18, 2013, 07:35:45 pm »
Just to say, ive got engaged to my girlfriend. Seemed the right thing to do. We can change...

Congrats Carl!! Really pleased for you.
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9410 on: October 18, 2013, 07:37:30 pm »
Just to say, ive got engaged to my girlfriend. Seemed the right thing to do. We can change...
Fantastic news!!

Congratulations mate.  You really should start a thread to shout it out!
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Offline Malaysian Kopite

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9411 on: October 18, 2013, 08:13:35 pm »
Just to say, ive got engaged to my girlfriend. Seemed the right thing to do. We can change...
Congrats mate, read it on Facebook first  ;D
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Offline cowtownred

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9412 on: October 18, 2013, 08:27:08 pm »
Well in Carl xx

Offline Corkboy

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9413 on: October 18, 2013, 09:10:57 pm »
Player!

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9414 on: October 18, 2013, 09:14:00 pm »
Just to say, ive got engaged to my girlfriend. Seemed the right thing to do. We can change...
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh

Made up for you mate, great stuff.
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Offline Sir Harvest Fields

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9415 on: October 19, 2013, 08:58:19 am »
Thanks guys , she is a positive influence in my life. Plus she has big tits so thats a plus ;)
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9416 on: October 19, 2013, 11:34:02 am »
Thanks guys , she is a positive influence in my life. Plus she has big tits so thats a plus ;)

... and a temper I've been told. ;) But you need a feisty woman to keep you under control. Congrats mate. Chuffed for you to be honest.

Offline Billy The Kid

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9417 on: October 19, 2013, 11:49:12 pm »
So whats the plan for your stag party Carl?

Strippers? Acts of sexual depravity? and soft drinks for everyone? ;D
When overtaken by defeat, as you may be many times, remember than mans faith in his own ability is tested many times before he is crowned with final victory. Defeats are nothing more than challenges to keep trying.” – Napoleon Hill.

Offline Red Genius

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9418 on: October 20, 2013, 12:20:49 am »
So whats the plan for your stag party Carl?

Strippers? Acts of sexual depravity? and soft drinks for everyone? ;D

Fuck that Maggie has already pre-ordered Carls fucking Cavalier ;)
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Offline Sir Harvest Fields

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9419 on: October 20, 2013, 09:29:19 am »
Stag party? Nah just a chinese and a few beers would be great. As bizarre as it sounds in this thread, i dont wanna get ratted. Dont see the point to be honest. Male strippers is a good call. Maybe a open bonfire and invite the local police force, ya know, just to re-live old times ;)
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Offline Jonathan Hall ☆☆☆☆☆☆

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9420 on: October 20, 2013, 08:58:49 pm »
Thanks guys , she is a positive influence in my life. Plus she has big tits so thats a plus ;)

She has one bit tit, you...
Right which bastards eaten me Tapas?

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9421 on: October 21, 2013, 09:01:55 am »

Offline Sir Harvest Fields

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9422 on: October 21, 2013, 10:00:50 am »
Whats a bit tit? Is that like a mis-shapen one ?
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9423 on: October 21, 2013, 10:07:40 am »
Whats a bit tit? Is that like a mis-shapen one ?

Bit tit is slang for BIG TIT, ya TIT!

Offline Sir Harvest Fields

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9424 on: October 21, 2013, 10:11:02 am »
Ok fatty, calm down ;)
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9425 on: October 21, 2013, 10:30:36 am »
Ok fatty, calm down ;)

You like'm fat, I kmow.... ;)

Alright move along, nothing to see here!

Offline Sir Harvest Fields

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9426 on: October 21, 2013, 10:33:23 am »
Apart from your wobbling carcass mate :) Ill send you a t-shirt that says ' wide load ' for xmas mate cos i luvs ya.

Anyway back on track before the mods get angry, hows everyone doing. Ive somewhat sidetracked the thread lol.
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9427 on: October 21, 2013, 08:06:55 pm »
Fuckin hell Hally. I now cant get the image of them in the aisle out my head. One with one tit and one with one eye.

been giggling like a schooly for ages.

All the badge kissing in the world don't make up for the fact that they are, frankly, not Liverpool Football Club. It's not their fault. Its just how it is.

Offline AndyInVA

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9428 on: October 23, 2013, 05:49:58 pm »
Just to say, ive got engaged to my girlfriend. Seemed the right thing to do. We can change...

havnt checked this ages

this is fantastic news mate

I do think a good happy home partnership can be the best thing in the world. it just makes everything better and makes the thought of even needing a drink reduce

well done

Offline AndyInVA

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9429 on: October 23, 2013, 05:58:55 pm »
Just to add my 10c to the AA part of the discussion.

I think if anyone is serious about quitting it would make sense to at least go to more than one meeting. If it works for you, the meetings become another tool in the fight against addiction

Billy is dead on in that AA is not religous.

I attended about 15 meetings and just gave up. Partly because i went to back to 'light drinking' which even as I write is quite riduculous, but anyway

AA does use the work God a lot and I just found that it really pissed me off a bit. Plus I live in Bible belt so that are alot of bible thumpers in the room and the general atmosphere about God just made me feel like an outsider

but I certainly wouldnt consider being critical of it if I had not been there

Offline Red Genius

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9430 on: October 27, 2013, 07:16:24 am »
It's great to see this and  the depression thread on the second page of the boozer for a change.

Personally speaking, the biggest addiction i have is people - i'm like that bastard moth who flies into your light bulb, it's hot...no fucking good, yet for some apparent reason cannot keep the fuck away. It's like self inflicted torture... that leads to needing some escapism, forget Eastenders or Corrie....Football can only consume so much of one's time.

That's an innate stubborn natural nature to just chase the dragon. Sick. to. fucking. death. of deliberately chasing something that gives me a headfuck, which in turns leads me to be a weak as fuck wanker and opt for a "numbing effect"

I'd love to be able to just switch that shit right off, and do what most of you sane folk do and "fuck that fucking idiot off" - loyalty in most instances is a great virtue, in my case it just fucks me in the ass, leaves a spunk stain on my back and carries on.... i'm not daft, for christ sake, i've got a certificate that tells me i'm in the top 1% of mathmaticians at jovial teen-age. I know the demoninator in the equation that is fucked, but i still feel the need to attempt to make the problem - solved.

I see good in people and i guess that's from knowing i'm a pain in the arse, so i persist with trying to make something positive from that situation, giving up is not a favoured choice in my vocabulary.

I guess it likes a scales, when does persuing something become a hinderance to yourself? - the moment it puts you in a vulnerable compromising position...that's logic, but i'm a soft twat who carries on going on at it.... in the hope i can still positively influence the outcome.

Bit of a ramble, i know. But hey..... if i didn't have  this thread at times to dump upon my thoughts, i don't know where i'd be... probably 6 feet under. 
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9431 on: October 27, 2013, 08:35:42 am »
Morning mate, have you been on it again. I know you have been having a few problems lately so was wondering how the intake was.
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9432 on: October 27, 2013, 09:00:52 am »
Morning mate, have you been on it again. I know you have been having a few problems lately so was wondering how the intake was.

I've been "ok" - had a couple bottles of wine last night, went to bed, woke up around 6ish.... got a ten pack of beer on the go now.

I'm ok, Carl, alcohol has never been my problem per'se.... it's always been the comfort blanket when my head goes west. It could become a problem if i was on it, every single day, i'm more the binge drinker type, but i know i'm binging up my arse when i get withdrawels.

Everyone will tell me - get off the booze and everything will be ok!!!... well frankly thats shite, i'm drinking because i couldn't find a dyson to vacuum my head out my arse, so i drank to ignore it...

Not clever, never pretty... but that's the script. I'd love to wipe the slate clean and start again,  but unfortunately life just aint like that... you got friends family and in my case a whole load of baggage i'm carrying around.

Hows you anyway mate?
"I have been privileged and lucky to wear the legendary red shirt. No one can take it away from me. YNWA, I don't have to walk alone because Liverpool FC will always be in my heart."

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9433 on: October 27, 2013, 09:08:52 am »
It's great to see this and  the depression thread on the second page of the boozer for a change.

Personally speaking, the biggest addiction i have is people - i'm like that bastard moth who flies into your light bulb, it's hot...no fucking good, yet for some apparent reason cannot keep the fuck away. It's like self inflicted torture... that leads to needing some escapism, forget Eastenders or Corrie....Football can only consume so much of one's time.

That's an innate stubborn natural nature to just chase the dragon. Sick. to. fucking. death. of deliberately chasing something that gives me a headfuck, which in turns leads me to be a weak as fuck wanker and opt for a "numbing effect"

I'd love to be able to just switch that shit right off, and do what most of you sane folk do and "fuck that fucking idiot off" - loyalty in most instances is a great virtue, in my case it just fucks me in the ass, leaves a spunk stain on my back and carries on.... i'm not daft, for christ sake, i've got a certificate that tells me i'm in the top 1% of mathmaticians at jovial teen-age. I know the demoninator in the equation that is fucked, but i still feel the need to attempt to make the problem - solved.

I see good in people and i guess that's from knowing i'm a pain in the arse, so i persist with trying to make something positive from that situation, giving up is not a favoured choice in my vocabulary.

I guess it likes a scales, when does persuing something become a hinderance to yourself? - the moment it puts you in a vulnerable compromising position...that's logic, but i'm a soft twat who carries on going on at it.... in the hope i can still positively influence the outcome.

Bit of a ramble, i know. But hey..... if i didn't have  this thread at times to dump upon my thoughts, i don't know where i'd be... probably 6 feet under. 
I think you and me have the same problem.I've realised over the past few weeks what my biggest weakness is.

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9434 on: October 27, 2013, 09:12:58 am »
Im doing well mate. Now im engaged ive got to behave myself ;) New house is lovely , work is just work, moving up in my social standings as it were with regards to the bike club etc. Usual shit going on in the background but compared to a couple of years back im absolutely brilliant. Thats not to say i dont have my off days, as we all do , it just doesnt seem like such a pit of despair as it was before. Ive things to aim for now which didnt seem the case before.

From my viewpoint i really cant say get off the booze to you mate as that would be highly hypocritical of me as you know. What i do know is that when it all settles down for you it will become a lot easier for you to lay off it. Booze really fixes fuck all and we all know this, but it helps to blot out life for a while and imo that helps. Just some small release from the world, however temporary. Thing is, thats just some quick release, its not a fix. Its like taking Morphine for a broken leg. It takes away the pain but it dont fix the reason for the pain. I reckon you need to take a step back mate and see what your options are. You know where i am should you need me, although my phone is playing up big time so i may not get your messages very quickly.

"Woe to you, Oh Earth and Sea, for the Devil sends the beast with wrath, because he knows the time is short...Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast for it is a human number, its number is Six hundred and sixty six."

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9435 on: October 27, 2013, 09:29:40 am »
Im doing well mate. Now im engaged ive got to behave myself ;) New house is lovely , work is just work, moving up in my social standings as it were with regards to the bike club etc. Usual shit going on in the background but compared to a couple of years back im absolutely brilliant. Thats not to say i dont have my off days, as we all do , it just doesnt seem like such a pit of despair as it was before. Ive things to aim for now which didnt seem the case before.

From my viewpoint i really cant say get off the booze to you mate as that would be highly hypocritical of me as you know. What i do know is that when it all settles down for you it will become a lot easier for you to lay off it. Booze really fixes fuck all and we all know this, but it helps to blot out life for a while and imo that helps. Just some small release from the world, however temporary. Thing is, thats just some quick release, its not a fix. Its like taking Morphine for a broken leg. It takes away the pain but it dont fix the reason for the pain. I reckon you need to take a step back mate and see what your options are. You know where i am should you need me, although my phone is playing up big time so i may not get your messages very quickly.



I'm so bloody happy for you, i really, genuinely am. Carl, where you've come from to where you are now.... getting out the gutter is not easy and you've not only achieved that, you've got a solid job and now getting married!... bloody hell, be careful it'll be kids next ;)

I know mate, i do drink to "blot it out" i know that much... i'm not daft like, i've been labelled as the guy who is great at giving advice, shocking at listening to his own.

Like i said, to me it's about people... most folk i know, just let things go when it becomes difficult whether its mates of girlfriends, i don't... i quest on trying to make it right, even when it's a futile exercise. But that's always been me, i've never walked away. I always believe that people are your life, without them on an island alone, what have you got? not a lot.... I, however focus on people that perhaps are not always healthy for my mind, which leads me to wanting to 'blot out for a bit'

My brother (who i love) tells me i need to focus on myself, he's right i do, but my nature is to focus on other people... it's just who i am, to me i'm collateral damage, i don't care much about myself, more about everybody else.... probably because i don't much like myself at this moment, so i want to find a balance in making other peoples lives better. It gives me a sense of purpose.

My mum, bless her, she's great is pretty close to the money in telling me i need to channel that into someone that's healthy for me, well  find me a woman that doesn't tear your heart out your arse at times and i'll show you how to stick air onto a wall.

To be honest mate - its a mentality and as i said to my old man, i just wanna get out of the habbit of feeling like i've lost something - a couple wins and i'll be right back to where i'm best. But that's far easier said than done when the wins you're looking for are from situations that you can't manipulate. I mean who ffs wakes up 14 months after breaking up with their ex after 4 hours sleep having dreamt about a moment in time that made them happy?

I don't do the whole walking away thing very well.
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The Legend - Sami Hyypia

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9436 on: October 27, 2013, 09:30:32 am »
I think you and me have the same problem.I've realised over the past few weeks what my biggest weakness is.

Open up mate, talking is the way forward.... that's the best thing about this thread, lots of wise heads to help point us in the right direction.
"I have been privileged and lucky to wear the legendary red shirt. No one can take it away from me. YNWA, I don't have to walk alone because Liverpool FC will always be in my heart."

The Legend - Sami Hyypia

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9437 on: October 27, 2013, 09:37:35 am »
I can see exactly what you are saying mate. I was the same, i didnt care about me at all and just wanted to make someone else happy regardless of cost to myself. Thing is, whilst i was drinking i was doing ok in that regard but i was just digging myself a hole. The lower i got the less i cared about me. We all know how that ended up. You are a good man and you owe it to yourself to see the good in you and what you can do for YOU. Its a selfish thing to think but for once, be selfish and think about you. You have supported me throughout all my shit , now try and support yourself mate. We are all here should you need us but as cliched as it is, you have to want to help yourself first mate.


Small steps mate, thats the quickest way forward...
"Woe to you, Oh Earth and Sea, for the Devil sends the beast with wrath, because he knows the time is short...Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the beast for it is a human number, its number is Six hundred and sixty six."

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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9438 on: October 27, 2013, 09:57:36 am »
I will get there mate, i have to, what's the alternative? Getting shitfaced until i die an early death... fuck that, i've got things i want to achieve before i walk off this planet, i want kids a family, to wake up in two months at stupid o'clock and see the sheer happiness on a little guys face as he unwraps his soiled Evertonian shirt ;)

I've got nephews and nieces, i look around at my mates - and i want kids, that's my driving motivation, my word Carl i wish i wasn't such a fucking bellend and took that chance with my ex, it was all she ever wanted, marriage, family... and i did, genuinely love the girl. Which is why i hate myself on two front, i destroyed her life, and it's destroyed mine.

However.... the driving force is always there's tomorrow, tomorrow is another day, it can be a step closer to that holy grail. I'm an optimist at heart, which goes to demonstrate just how far i'd fallen.

I can't achieve what i want in this state of mind however, i need to get better , healthy before i could even contemplate having kids.... how could a pisshead be responsible eh? - i'd never  be THAT selfish.

I'd love to have you about Carl, because i know we're not perfect, but you'd damn well talk sense....and i'm a terrible listerner unless i believe in the person i'm hearing.
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Re: Alcohol Issues
« Reply #9439 on: October 27, 2013, 10:03:58 am »
I don't want to derail this but are you still writing your book, Carl or has it been parked for now?