Author Topic: Jokes so bad they're funny  (Read 150927 times)

Offline soxfan

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2200 on: January 11, 2019, 08:40:58 PM »
On their wedding night, the groom gave a venereal disease to his new bride.

They lived herpely ever after.

Offline soxfan

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2201 on: January 11, 2019, 08:41:54 PM »
Why did the polygamist cross the aisle?

To get to the other bride!

Offline soxfan

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2202 on: January 11, 2019, 08:43:28 PM »
What do you do with a dead chemist?

You barium.

Offline Groundskeeper Willie

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2203 on: January 12, 2019, 12:04:16 PM »
I was going to do a joke about the clitoris, but I hear that can be quite sensitive to a lot of people. 
They don't think it be like it is, but it do.

Offline 24/7

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2204 on: January 12, 2019, 01:29:18 PM »
I was going to do a joke about the clitoris, but I hear that can be quite sensitive to a lot of people. 

Whereas the reality is you just couldn't put your finger on the punchline. For me, it simply rolls off the tip of my tongue.

:wave
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Offline Tesco tearaway

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2205 on: January 12, 2019, 02:59:30 PM »
Whereas the reality is you just couldn't put your finger on the punchline. For me, it simply rolls off the tip of my tongue.

:wave
What do you call a bag of fannys?
Clitorish alsorts.
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Offline 24/7

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2206 on: January 12, 2019, 03:05:50 PM »
Okay, for sake of balance, we need a version of that joke for penises! ;)
"Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom." - Rabindranath Tagore.

Offline Brian Blessed

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2207 on: January 12, 2019, 03:52:31 PM »
What do you call a bag of dicks?

The halftime thread ;)

Offline 24/7

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2208 on: January 12, 2019, 03:54:05 PM »
What do you call a bag of dicks?

The halftime thread ;)
:lmao WINNER :scarf
"Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom." - Rabindranath Tagore.

Offline Red_Mist

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2209 on: January 12, 2019, 05:54:02 PM »
I saw a man in the supermarket earlier who reminded me of Michael Jackson....

He came up to me and said ‘don’t forget about Michael Jackson’...

Offline only5times

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Offline BIG DICK NICK

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2211 on: January 12, 2019, 07:23:41 PM »
I saw a man in the supermarket earlier who reminded me of Michael Jackson....

He came up to me and said ‘don’t forget about Michael Jackson’...

:lmao Fucks sake

Offline Tesco tearaway

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2212 on: January 12, 2019, 07:23:58 PM »
What do you call a bag of dicks?

The halftime thread ;)
;D
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Offline 24/7

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2213 on: January 12, 2019, 08:00:48 PM »
I just spotted an albino dalmatian.

Well, it was the kindest thing I could think of doing....
"Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom." - Rabindranath Tagore.

Offline bradders1011

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2214 on: January 12, 2019, 09:20:57 PM »
That's a FAB 1 :thumbup

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Laughed more than I should have.
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Offline Red_Mist

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2215 on: January 13, 2019, 09:59:16 AM »
My mate bet me £100 that I couldn't do a butterfly impression...                                       

I thought, ‘that's worth a little flutter’...

Offline Dench57

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2216 on: January 14, 2019, 04:16:01 PM »
I saw a man in the supermarket earlier who reminded me of Michael Jackson....

He came up to me and said ‘don’t forget about Michael Jackson’...

ruined me  ;D
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Offline Dench57

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2217 on: January 14, 2019, 04:26:53 PM »
I got a vasectomy because I didn’t want any kids but when I got home they were still there
Loving Everton's business this summer. Here's an early call - they finish above Liverpool this season.
- Richard Keys (@richardajkeys) July 9, 2017

Offline sinnermichael

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2218 on: January 14, 2019, 05:49:34 PM »
I went skydiving today. This guy strapped himself to me, we jumped out of the plane and as we plummeted, he said,

"So, how long have you been an instructor?"

Offline Andy @ Allerton

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2219 on: January 14, 2019, 07:39:37 PM »
I once bought a car that was so shit, it didn't come with a warranty. It came with an apology.
Shove yer Brexit up yer arse you Nazi c*nts.

Offline Black & White Paul

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2220 on: January 14, 2019, 07:43:35 PM »
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.

Offline Bigly Red Richie

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2221 on: January 14, 2019, 09:39:12 PM »
 :D   slow burner.

Offline Alan B'Stard

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2222 on: January 14, 2019, 09:46:59 PM »
How many South American’s does it take to change a lightbulb?

A Brazilian.
“If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything”

Offline Alan B'Stard

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2223 on: January 14, 2019, 09:57:13 PM »
How does a train eat?

It goes chew chew.
“If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything”

Offline Alan B'Stard

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2224 on: January 14, 2019, 09:58:24 PM »
What time does Sean Connery get to Wimbledon?

Tennish
“If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything”

Offline 24/7

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2225 on: January 14, 2019, 10:11:10 PM »
Get out.  :evil
"Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom." - Rabindranath Tagore.

Offline 24/7

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2226 on: January 14, 2019, 10:41:29 PM »
Following the madness of the festive season, Santa's Little Helpers often suffer from exhaustion ,stress, burn out, self-esteem issues and existential crisis.

So this year, Santa is showing his caring and supportive side by giving them resources to strengthen and recharge emotionally and spiritually.

First up is his Elf Help book....
"Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom." - Rabindranath Tagore.

Offline Andy @ Allerton

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2227 on: Yesterday at 12:01:38 AM »
What's red and bad for your teeth?

A brick.
Shove yer Brexit up yer arse you Nazi c*nts.

Offline Fitzy.

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2228 on: Yesterday at 07:48:23 PM »
I once bought a car that was so shit, it didn't come with a warranty. It came with an apology.
Does this post come with an apology?


:P

Offline Fitzy.

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2229 on: Yesterday at 07:50:29 PM »
I saw a man in the supermarket earlier who reminded me of Michael Jackson....

He came up to me and said ‘don’t forget about Michael Jackson’...
Why is this making me laugh

Offline Mediocre Baron Bennekov

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2230 on: Yesterday at 08:19:18 PM »
I’m developing a phobia of German sausages.

I fear the wurst...

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2231 on: Yesterday at 08:22:48 PM »
My wife is always stealing my T-shirts and sweaters...

But if I take one of her dresses suddenly “we need to talk “.

Offline 24/7

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2232 on: Yesterday at 09:28:53 PM »
Does this post come with an apology?


:P
Oh Andy is an apology to himself, no fears.....
"Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom." - Rabindranath Tagore.

Offline King.Keita

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2233 on: Yesterday at 09:37:47 PM »
Son: why is my sister's name Teresa?

Dad: well, your mum loves Easter, and Teresa is an anagram of Easter.

Son: That makes sense, thanks Dad!

Dad: You're welcome, Alan.

Offline Ziltoid

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Re: Jokes so bad they're funny
« Reply #2234 on: Yesterday at 10:06:53 PM »
I saw a man in the supermarket earlier who reminded me of Michael Jackson....

He came up to me and said ‘don’t forget about Michael Jackson’...

Brilliant
He's got a tattoo on his wrist that says "I hate blackie blackie blackie blacks, and I fucking love handballing it into the opponent's goal and away from my own goal, and biting people, and kicking young kids in the bollocks when they ask for autographs. And diving. I fucking love that."