Author Topic: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club  (Read 3770810 times)

Offline lobsterboy

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60840 on: May 18, 2018, 12:01:55 PM »
There is something rotten in the state of Everton, and there always has been. They see us turning frogs into princes year after year, and all their frogs remain frogs - even when they get hold of a prince they somehow manage to turn him into a frog. It's always been like that, they just aren't very good at stuff. I don't hate them, and I don't even come into contact with their fans as I don't live there any more, but my mates who are blues know they are shite and their well honed gallows humour helps them deal with it.

When they get hold of a prince they sell him to Man Utd.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60841 on: May 18, 2018, 12:11:51 PM »
When they get hold of a prince they sell him to Man Utd.
That's the first time I ever seen Rooney described as a prince. ???

Offline Kekuleyule y'all!

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60842 on: May 18, 2018, 12:15:18 PM »
Just want Everton to be “great” again.

That’s not a small wish is it? Being great again is not something that should be prefixed with a “just”, not in their position.

Not “just want to enjoy the football again”, or even “be competitive,” which would be a reasonable aim. No, he wants them to be great, and doesn’t seem to think it’s too much to ask in the current situation and climate.  Fans like that are why the Everton manager’s job has been, and will continue to be, a poisoned chalice.

Offline lobsterboy

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60843 on: May 18, 2018, 12:33:36 PM »
That's the first time I ever seen Rooney described as a prince. ???

wasn't Shrek a prince via marriage?

Offline Lycan

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60844 on: May 18, 2018, 12:40:42 PM »
These lot never, ever learn.

Be prepared to lose the transfer window AGAIN this summer people.
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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60845 on: May 18, 2018, 12:49:28 PM »
wasn't Shrek a prince via marriage?
Shrek read a bad translation of the story which told him to fuck a pensioner to become a prince. He's still trying, bless him.
Gonna stay behind at work and wait to see what happens.

I am betting some split arse and crying.

Offline Red Berry

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60846 on: May 18, 2018, 01:00:20 PM »
Typical Everton fan:

<a href="https://www.youtube.com/v/2xKFTylKrPM" target="_blank" class="new_win">https://www.youtube.com/v/2xKFTylKrPM</a>
Jürgen Klopp does not adapt to English Football.  English Football adapts to Jurgan Klopp.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60847 on: May 18, 2018, 01:26:21 PM »
Just want Everton to be “great” again.

That’s not a small wish is it? Being great again is not something that should be prefixed with a “just”, not in their position.

Not “just want to enjoy the football again”, or even “be competitive,” which would be a reasonable aim. No, he wants them to be great, and doesn’t seem to think it’s too much to ask in the current situation and climate.  Fans like that are why the Everton manager’s job has been, and will continue to be, a poisoned chalice.

Odd you would pick out that word when the one that stood out for me more than that one was "again" since that implies they used to be great.  ;D

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60848 on: May 18, 2018, 01:54:03 PM »
Just want Everton to be “great” again.

That’s not a small wish is it? Being great again is not something that should be prefixed with a “just”, not in their position.

Not “just want to enjoy the football again”, or even “be competitive,” which would be a reasonable aim. No, he wants them to be great, and doesn’t seem to think it’s too much to ask in the current situation and climate.  Fans like that are why the Everton manager’s job has been, and will continue to be, a poisoned chalice.

MEGA - Make Everton Great Again
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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60849 on: May 18, 2018, 01:56:15 PM »
MEGA - Make Everton Great Again

Mass produce a load of red blue MEGA hats! Hugest, bigliest team in Liverpool!

Offline -HH-

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60850 on: May 18, 2018, 02:12:43 PM »
Odd you would pick out that word when the one that stood out for me more than that one was "again" since that implies they used to be great.  ;D

They were a great side in the 80s to be fair. It's fun to laugh at them but let's not pretend stuff.
Balotelli, Falcao, Cavani...

I'll be shocked if it's anyone other Etoo. Etoo or no-one. Simples.

In fact, I'll do you all a favor and ban myself from the January transfer window forum if we get anyone other than Etoo.

Offline red1977

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60851 on: May 18, 2018, 02:47:13 PM »
These lot never, ever learn.

Be prepared to lose the transfer window AGAIN this summer people.

Aaah, pre season. Evertons favourite time of year, they can boast about how good they are without having the actual games on to disprove everything they say.

Offline Flaccido Dongingo

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60852 on: May 18, 2018, 03:39:52 PM »
They were so dominant from 84-87, that Liverpool won a double, a European Cup and got to another European Cup final.
Vote Labour

Offline Kekuleyule y'all!

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60853 on: May 18, 2018, 05:09:56 PM »
They were so dominant from 84-87, that Liverpool won a double, a European Cup and got to another European Cup final.

A treble in 84 don’t forget.  8)

Offline Purple Red

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60854 on: May 18, 2018, 05:26:10 PM »
I take it this lot assume Simeone is going to take up the challenge after basically winning everything he can with Atletico.

Offline JayH93

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60855 on: May 18, 2018, 06:21:44 PM »
https://streamable.com/3gl4j

That first one is like me trying to play in goal now, and I've broken my wrist 3 times ;D

Offline boyspenhoolie

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60856 on: May 18, 2018, 08:27:51 PM »
I've not had the time to keep up with this thread recently; keeping abreast of the current ridiculousness of Everton requires putting in the hours of a full time job plus overtime ... but has this Neil Moxley article from last summer been revisited of late ? It's up there with the Gibbon Gloves/Monkey Mittens nonsense, whilst also (incredibly) managing to even out-sleaze the degenerate, hirsute laughing stock himself...

https://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/everton-real-credible-threat-liverpool-10807942

"It’s just what Klopp doesn’t need when trying to forge a new future for Liverpool FC – a resurgent Everton whose transfer business has made them as sexy this ­summer as Jennifer Lawrence in a basque."

"Everton FC. Are. Stirring."

  ???   :lmao







« Last Edit: May 18, 2018, 08:29:42 PM by boyspenhoolie »

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60857 on: May 18, 2018, 08:31:25 PM »
I've not had the time to keep up with this thread recently; keeping abreast of the current ridiculousness of Everton requires putting in the hours of a full time job plus overtime ... but has this Neil Moxley article from last summer been revisited of late ? It's up there with the Gibbon Gloves/Monkey Mittens nonsense, whilst also (incredibly) managing to even out-sleaze the degenerate, hirsute laughing stock himself...

https://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/everton-real-credible-threat-liverpool-10807942

"It’s just what Klopp doesn’t need when trying to forge a new future for Liverpool FC – a resurgent Everton whose transfer business has made them as sexy this ­summer as Jennifer Lawrence in a basque."

"Everton FC. Are. Stirring."

  ???   :lmao

JESUS! That is awful. :D

Is this where FC Sexy came from? I always wondered :D
Gonna stay behind at work and wait to see what happens.

I am betting some split arse and crying.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60858 on: May 18, 2018, 08:33:52 PM »


Truly amazing ability to get absolutely everything wrong.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60859 on: May 18, 2018, 08:36:33 PM »
I've not had the time to keep up with this thread recently; keeping abreast of the current ridiculousness of Everton requires putting in the hours of a full time job plus overtime ... but has this Neil Moxley article from last summer been revisited of late ? It's up there with the Gibbon Gloves/Monkey Mittens nonsense, whilst also (incredibly) managing to even out-sleaze the degenerate, hirsute laughing stock himself...

https://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/everton-real-credible-threat-liverpool-10807942

"It’s just what Klopp doesn’t need when trying to forge a new future for Liverpool FC – a resurgent Everton whose transfer business has made them as sexy this ­summer as Jennifer Lawrence in a basque."

"Everton FC. Are. Stirring."

  ???   :lmao

Love one of the comments below as to who would get into Liverpool's first team from Everton's squad, apparently it would be:

Pickford, Keane, Klaasen, Sandro, schneiderlin, probably rooney and williams too...

 :o  ;D
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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60860 on: May 18, 2018, 08:38:45 PM »
JESUS! That is awful. :D

Is this where FC Sexy came from? I always wondered :D

I think the FC Sexy stuff originated during their Europa League qualifiers, but I could be wrong.
« Last Edit: May 18, 2018, 08:41:03 PM by Gerry Attrick »

Offline Golyo

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60861 on: May 18, 2018, 08:39:04 PM »
wasn't Shrek a prince via marriage?
exactly
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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60862 on: May 18, 2018, 08:53:48 PM »
I think the FC Sexy stuff originated during their Europa League qualifiers, but I could be wrong.
Oh yes, was that the game where they played Razorstiltskinback of [google random eastern country] and the everton match report was creaming themselves about how Sigurdsson and Klaassan were dovetailing together? :D I vaguely remember reading that in between burst of laughing.
Gonna stay behind at work and wait to see what happens.

I am betting some split arse and crying.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60863 on: May 18, 2018, 08:57:19 PM »
Oh yes, was that the game where they played Razorstiltskinback of [google random eastern country] and the everton match report was creaming themselves about how Sigurdsson and Klaassan were dovetailing together? :D I vaguely remember reading that in between burst of laughing.

I am 100% sure I read that. I remember laughing at it now and commentating here. Yet when I google the words europa everton dovetailing and limit it between the months of July and September this year, I get nada! Did they delete their article gushing over their side beating probably the worst team in the competition 1-0?
Gonna stay behind at work and wait to see what happens.

I am betting some split arse and crying.

Offline boyspenhoolie

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60864 on: May 18, 2018, 09:15:42 PM »
 
Love one of the comments below as to who would get into Liverpool's first team from Everton's squad, apparently it would be:

Pickford, Keane, Klaasen, Sandro, schneiderlin, probably rooney and williams too...

 :o  ;D

...and that was before they'd even signed Iceland.   ;D

I see they've got the hump with Gibbon Gloves now cos he's moved on from bigging up last summer's transfer business to calling them a shambles...

http://www.hitc.com/en-gb/2018/05/18/richard-keys-blasts-everton-shambles/

https://members.boardhost.com/everton-forum/thread/1526632687.html

I suspect Neil Moxley is keeping his head down and keeping quiet in the hope he got away with it and nobody even remembers his creepy Jennifer Lawrence sexy EFC basque stuff.  ;D


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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60865 on: May 18, 2018, 09:22:58 PM »

...and that was before they'd even signed Iceland.   ;D

I see they've got the hump with Gibbon Gloves now cos he's moved on from bigging up last summer's transfer business to calling them a shambles...

http://www.hitc.com/en-gb/2018/05/18/richard-keys-blasts-everton-shambles/

https://members.boardhost.com/everton-forum/thread/1526632687.html

I suspect Neil Moxley is keeping his head down and keeping quiet in the hope he got away with it and nobody even remembers his creepy Jennifer Lawrence sexy EFC basque stuff.  ;D

Posted by Bob_Ross_happy_tree on May 18, 2018, 10:48 am, in reply to "Richard keys calling us a shambles"

Richard Keys has to pay vast sums of money to the press to keep out stories of him being shit on tortured for sexual gratification behind his wife's back. Genuinely used to get shit rubbed all over his hairy torso and volleyed in the bollocks. Fax.


Amazing how long it takes for any Everton topic to turn angry & weird. That was just 2 posts.
Gonna stay behind at work and wait to see what happens.

I am betting some split arse and crying.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60866 on: May 18, 2018, 09:24:52 PM »
Posted by Bob_Ross_happy_tree on May 18, 2018, 10:48 am, in reply to "Richard keys calling us a shambles"

Richard Keys has to pay vast sums of money to the press to keep out stories of him being shit on tortured for sexual gratification behind his wife's back. Genuinely used to get shit rubbed all over his hairy torso and volleyed in the bollocks. Fax.


Amazing how long it takes for any Everton topic to turn angry & weird. That was just 2 posts.
Weird?  ???

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60867 on: May 18, 2018, 09:25:40 PM »
Quote
Posted by tattyhead on May 18, 2018, 12:13 pm, in reply to "Re: Richard keys calling us a shambles"

Allardyce is on the Keys and Gray gravy train to Qatar whenever he is out of work, like Pardew, the late Ray Wilkins, Denis Wise, Peter Reid, Mcmahon and others.. flown out first class, BeIn Sports sofa on the Friday/Saturday, on the lash/golf with keys and gray before and after, (high-class hookers, i guess, if you want one) fly home about Tuesday.

Nice work if you can get it and hence Keys 'RIP British managers shite whenever a foreigner gets a prem league job and one of his misogynist mates gets overlooked again


This though - I can actually see being true.
Gonna stay behind at work and wait to see what happens.

I am betting some split arse and crying.

Offline boyspenhoolie

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60868 on: May 18, 2018, 09:28:48 PM »
Posted by Bob_Ross_happy_tree on May 18, 2018, 10:48 am, in reply to "Richard keys calling us a shambles"

Richard Keys has to pay vast sums of money to the press to keep out stories of him being shit on tortured for sexual gratification behind his wife's back. Genuinely used to get shit rubbed all over his hairy torso and volleyed in the bollocks. Fax.


Amazing how long it takes for any Everton topic to turn angry & weird. That was just 2 posts.

I know, they truly are ace - but apparently it's us who are the cult that issues fatwas to anyone who dares say anything remotely bad about us. ( the Keys stuff is probably true, like  ;D

Offline boyspenhoolie

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60869 on: May 18, 2018, 10:09:22 PM »
It's getting messy, they've moved/moysed on from Southampton being their rivals to re-enacting their glory days of 1984 by fighting it out with Watford ....

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/watford-may-be-forced-to-arbitration-in-silva-dispute-v8k0spmtk

God knows what horrors lurk behind the paywall  ( so much fuss over the guy that relegated Hull  ;D )

Quote
Allardyce goes missing
Everton’s decision to sack Allardyce has not surprised many of the club’s players, who on several occasions last season were left questioning his approach to the job.

After one away defeat, the squad were hauled in for an extra training session on a Sunday morning which began with a pep talk from the assistant manager Sammy Lee, who urged them all to stick together during a difficult period.

Following the speech, which was well received one player, inquired as to the whereabouts of Allardyce, with Lee informing a stunned squad that the manager was at his house in Spain.
   ;D
« Last Edit: May 18, 2018, 10:14:53 PM by boyspenhoolie »

Offline So... Howard Phillips

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60870 on: May 18, 2018, 10:13:45 PM »
It's getting messy, they've moved/moysed on from Southampton being their rivals to re-enacting their glory days of 1984 by fighting it out with Watford ....

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/watford-may-be-forced-to-arbitration-in-silva-dispute-v8k0spmtk

God knows what horrors lurk behind the paywall  ( so much fuss over the guy that relegated Hull  ;D )

Thanks for that. I won't be able to sleep tonight, what with my nightmares about the Bitter related horrors lurking behind that paywall of terror.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60871 on: May 18, 2018, 10:23:25 PM »
It's getting messy, they've moved/moysed on from Southampton being their rivals to re-enacting their glory days of 1984 by fighting it out with Watford ....

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/watford-may-be-forced-to-arbitration-in-silva-dispute-v8k0spmtk

God knows what horrors lurk behind the paywall  ( so much fuss over the guy that relegated Hull  ;D )
   ;D

I guess Spain is the place to be if you want 11 fried eggs in one sitting :D
Gonna stay behind at work and wait to see what happens.

I am betting some split arse and crying.

Offline ABZ Rover

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60872 on: May 18, 2018, 10:31:52 PM »
"Everton FC. Are. Stirring."

Aye, Everton are stirring all right.  Stirring the huge crock of shit to see which turd will surface to be their new manager.
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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60873 on: May 18, 2018, 10:34:24 PM »
It's getting messy, they've moved/moysed on from Southampton being their rivals to re-enacting their glory days of 1984 by fighting it out with Watford ....

https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/watford-may-be-forced-to-arbitration-in-silva-dispute-v8k0spmtk

God knows what horrors lurk behind the paywall  ( so much fuss over the guy that relegated Hull  ;D )
   ;D
basically accusing Watford of doing to hull what they did to Watford although there was a release clause, basically being massive grasses.

The ev offered Watford £1m for someone they offered £12m for a few months back tho :lmao

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60874 on: May 18, 2018, 10:47:14 PM »
I am 100% sure I read that. I remember laughing at it now and commentating here. Yet when I google the words europa everton dovetailing and limit it between the months of July and September this year, I get nada! Did they delete their article gushing over their side beating probably the worst team in the competition 1-0?



Didn't they start in europa qualifiers in June though? The 1st pre qualifying round before the qualifiers ???

Offline Peabee

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60875 on: May 18, 2018, 10:49:13 PM »
Is Pickford the first premier league keeper who is scared of the ball?

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60876 on: May 18, 2018, 10:50:19 PM »


Didn't they start in europa qualifiers in June though? The 1st pre qualifying round before the qualifiers ???

According to their site, the first game was on 14 July. Against Ru˛omberok of Ru˛omberok (Population 30,000)
Gonna stay behind at work and wait to see what happens.

I am betting some split arse and crying.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60877 on: May 18, 2018, 10:53:42 PM »
According to their site, the first game was on 14 July. Against Ru˛omberok of Ru˛omberok (Population 30,000)
was that the team who’s stadium is next to a Tesco?

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60878 on: May 18, 2018, 10:57:19 PM »
Genuinely looking forward to seeing the detailed description of how our transfers pale in comparison to every player (maybe?) they sign.

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Re: Fat Sam Shaped Hole - Daddy Day Care Fight Club
« Reply #60879 on: May 18, 2018, 11:00:49 PM »
Is Pickford the first premier league keeper who is scared of the ball?



No Hans Segars was the first.