Author Topic: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?  (Read 6068 times)

Offline Paragon

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Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« on: January 24, 2012, 12:49:58 AM »
To use as a prop for a show! I've searched the web but I've not had much luck so far. I'm not holding my breath...
Would be even more fun if you could stand up to a hook to the jaw for being a snidey bastard. But then that's reality! No one needs to 'swim or drown' in a coward's paradise.

Offline Anywhichwayicant

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #1 on: January 24, 2012, 12:51:53 AM »
Coffee table?

Offline Bigly Red Richie

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #2 on: January 24, 2012, 12:54:00 AM »
 :lmao :lmao :lmao :lmao


Only on RAWK!








Doest it have to be wooden, or can you just go to a fancy dress shop and get one of the dumb plastic ones?   Failing that, if you've got time, knock one up yourself.

Offline Paragon

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #3 on: January 24, 2012, 12:55:39 AM »
Doest it have to be wooden, or can you just go to a fancy dress shop and get one of the dumb plastic ones?   Failing that, if you've got time, knock one up yourself.

It would have to be strong enough to support my full weight for a full two hour show, and look like a wooden leg. I suppose it doesn't have to be wood.
Would be even more fun if you could stand up to a hook to the jaw for being a snidey bastard. But then that's reality! No one needs to 'swim or drown' in a coward's paradise.

Offline Lo

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #4 on: January 24, 2012, 12:56:27 AM »
Freecycle  :D

Offline Bigly Red Richie

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Offline Crimson_Tank

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #6 on: January 24, 2012, 12:56:45 AM »
Might try your local pirate hangout.... or see if you can borrow one from a war re-enactment group (if they exist where you reside)
A dead animal is a dead animal. And a piece of meat is a piece of meat.

Offline Paragon

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #7 on: January 24, 2012, 12:58:57 AM »
 :nirnir Stop suggesting table legs. I'm not buying a table leg and I'm certainly not breaking any tables!
Would be even more fun if you could stand up to a hook to the jaw for being a snidey bastard. But then that's reality! No one needs to 'swim or drown' in a coward's paradise.

Offline Billy The Kid

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #8 on: January 24, 2012, 01:01:19 AM »
Give Heather Mills a call, she might have one spare
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Offline KERRYKOP

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Offline Bigly Red Richie

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #10 on: January 24, 2012, 01:10:50 AM »
Paragon.   Spill the beans.


I take it you are a pirate in a stage play or something?


What lead up time do you need to have it by, as I'm sure it woulddn't be that difficult to make one up.

That said, it would be mightily uncomfortable to wear for any great lemgth of time at a stretch, as your good leg would be tied up behing you, for the wooden leg/stump to be attachet at your knee/bended knee.

The circulation to your trust up leg would become uncomfortable quite quickly, so wering it for more than a few minutes at a time would be an issue.

TWO HOURS STRAIGHT....... you'd probably be getting your foot amputated through lack of circulation.


Have you really thought this through?
« Last Edit: January 24, 2012, 01:15:31 AM by Big Red Richie »

Offline Brian Blessed

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #11 on: January 24, 2012, 01:12:01 AM »
I once knew a man with a wooden leg, named Smith.

Offline Bigly Red Richie

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #12 on: January 24, 2012, 01:12:50 AM »
I once knew a man with a wooden leg, named Smith.
Are you sure it wasn't Mr.Carpenter?

Offline Anywhichwayicant

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #13 on: January 24, 2012, 01:13:22 AM »
Give Bear Grylls a watch, he's pretty resourceful.

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Offline Brian Blessed

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #15 on: January 24, 2012, 01:14:08 AM »
Are you sure it wasn't Mr.Carpenter?
I see who hasn't seen Mary Poppins!

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #16 on: January 24, 2012, 01:14:10 AM »
Give Heather Mills a call, she might have one spare

If there's one thing she doesn't have it's a spare.

Offline 1021

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Offline Paragon

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #18 on: January 24, 2012, 01:29:09 AM »
Paragon.   Spill the beans.


I take it you are a pirate in a stage play or something?


What lead up time do you need to have it by, as I'm sure it woulddn't be that difficult to make one up.

That said, it would be mightily uncomfortable to wear for any great lemgth of time at a stretch, as your good leg would be tied up behing you, for the wooden leg/stump to be attachet at your knee/bended knee.

The circulation to your trust up leg would become uncomfortable quite quickly, so wering it for more than a few minutes at a time would be an issue.

TWO HOURS STRAIGHT....... you'd probably be getting your foot amputated through lack of circulation.


Have you really thought this through?

 ;D We're putting on a play called 'Spring 71' by Arthur Adamov. The play is based on the Paris Commune in 1871. My character is some sort of war hero and is described as having a wooden leg in the script. I don't have to have a wooden leg but it would be great if I could somehow do it.

With regard to the discomfort it will cause me, I'd have to completely bend my lower leg back so that my heel would be touching my arse in order to somehow attatch this makeshift wooden leg to my knee. The guy who's currently playing Lord Farquaad in Shrek in the London West End has to bend his legs like this and tuck his knees into special shoes to walk around the stage to make himself look like a dwarf. He does this for the best part of two hours. It won't be easy but it's achievable.
« Last Edit: January 24, 2012, 01:30:43 AM by Paragon »
Would be even more fun if you could stand up to a hook to the jaw for being a snidey bastard. But then that's reality! No one needs to 'swim or drown' in a coward's paradise.

Offline Brian Blessed

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #19 on: January 24, 2012, 01:32:35 AM »
Can you get metaphorical, have an erection the entire time and let that be your wooden leg.

Offline Bigly Red Richie

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #20 on: January 24, 2012, 01:39:19 AM »
Although it's do'able.  I bet you it's going to be very umcomfortable, and without some sort of training/exersises/stretches/technique  etc.  you'll find it extremely difficult to wear it for two hours straight.

The likes of the fella above who does it as part of his profession, will probably have some sort of coaching to be able to deal with it.

Truss up your leg behind you on the sofa whilst watching TV and see how long you last, without even trying to put weight on it.   I think you'll be surprised how difficult it is to do for an extended period of time.


Good luck with that.

Offline Lfsea

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #21 on: January 24, 2012, 01:43:48 AM »
The wooden leg shop?

Offline Paragon

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #22 on: January 24, 2012, 01:49:20 AM »
Although it's do'able.  I bet you it's going to be very umcomfortable, and without some sort of training/exersises/stretches/technique  etc.  you'll find it extremely difficult to wear it for two hours straight.

The likes of the fella above who does it as part of his profession, will probably have some sort of coaching to be able to deal with it.

Truss up your leg behind you on the sofa whilst watching TV and see how long you last, without even trying to put weight on it.   I think you'll be surprised how difficult it is to do for an extended period of time.


Good luck with that.

Yeah he would no doubt have had to train for the role.

As I said a wooden leg is not an absolute necessity but it would be better to include it as it's part of my character's description in the script. The director advised me a few weeks ago that I should try walking around my house (with the wooden leg attatched) to see if it is achievable. I'm confident that if I practice and work hard then I can make it work, however sorting this make-shift wooden leg is the first step.

And thanks, I'll let you know how it goes  :P
Would be even more fun if you could stand up to a hook to the jaw for being a snidey bastard. But then that's reality! No one needs to 'swim or drown' in a coward's paradise.

Offline eAyeAddio

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #23 on: January 24, 2012, 02:01:26 AM »
I once knew a man with a wooden leg, named Smith.

Why would anyone call a wooden leg "Smith" ?

Surely "Woody" would be more appropriate?
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I laugh at them because they are all the same.....

Offline KERRYKOP

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #24 on: January 24, 2012, 02:10:39 AM »
I once knew a man with a wooden leg, named Smith.
Who also had a wooden tit
Everyday he'd go to work
Out of it milk it would squirt
You should have seen him when he took a shit

Offline Bigly Red Richie

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #25 on: January 24, 2012, 02:12:06 AM »
Yeah he would no doubt have had to train for the role.

As I said a wooden leg is not an absolute necessity but it would be better to include it as it's part of my character's description in the script. The director advised me a few weeks ago that I should try walking around my house (with the wooden leg attatched) to see if it is achievable. I'm confident that if I practice and work hard then I can make it work, however sorting this make-shift wooden leg is the first step.

And thanks, I'll let you know how it goes  :P
When do you need it by?

Offline The Gulleysucker

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #26 on: January 24, 2012, 02:24:50 AM »
They don't look too difficult to make, certainly to get a reasonable replica for stage use...



That's a US Civil war one on US Ebay (it not be cheap!) so the style is probably ok for the period of your play.

You could possibly use a cut down spade handle as the basis for the prop with some extension bits screwed on the side to run up the sides of your thigh and then tape it all up with Gaffa or something similar.

It's probably going to hurt a bit wearing it for any length of time though!

There also used to be a place years back called Coopers in Slough (I think run by Tommy Coopers son) that hired out stage props.
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Offline soxfan

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #27 on: January 24, 2012, 05:41:12 AM »
I just exited the Marital Sex thread where someone is having his wife do unspeakable things to him...and he's admitting it  :o  ...and now I venture into a thread where someone wants a wooden leg.

I am frightened to click on the next thread.  :'(

Offline scoobs

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #28 on: January 24, 2012, 05:45:55 AM »
Boston.

Offline leroy

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #29 on: January 24, 2012, 06:00:07 AM »
Disturbingly my eyes were flicking along the thread list and went from the Marital Sex thread to Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden Leg?.

 :o

Offline It's Jimmy Corkhill

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #30 on: January 24, 2012, 06:07:07 AM »


just use one of these old discarded wooden legs from asia, at least the missus could borrow it when you're finished..

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #31 on: January 24, 2012, 07:29:06 AM »
You could always chop off your leg and get a genuine one for free off the NHS. Saves fucking about on E-Bay etc.
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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #32 on: January 24, 2012, 07:37:43 AM »
Just varnish one of your legs and walk with a limp. Sorted.

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #33 on: January 24, 2012, 07:40:05 AM »
They don't look too difficult to make, certainly to get a reasonable replica for stage use...

http://i.ebayimg.com/t/Civil-War-Vet-Peg-Leg-Wooden-Prosthetic-Pirate-Wow-001-/00/s/NjQwWDQ4MA==/$(KGrHqN,!lsE8FS2(o7-BPFuKe(KdQ~~60_3.JPG

That's a US Civil war one on US Ebay (it not be cheap!) so the style is probably ok for the period of your play.

You could possibly use a cut down spade handle as the basis for the prop with some extension bits screwed on the side to run up the sides of your thigh and then tape it all up with Gaffa or something similar.

It's probably going to hurt a bit wearing it for any length of time though!

There also used to be a place years back called Coopers in Slough (I think run by Tommy Coopers son) that hired out stage props.


You could use an old cricket bat turned upside down and cut off (or and old style oar) for the basis of that style.

Offline El Campeador

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #34 on: January 24, 2012, 06:09:18 PM »
Buy a lampshade and take it to Rafa.

Sorted.

Offline hulksagoodboy

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #35 on: January 24, 2012, 06:25:23 PM »
 :lmao :lmao :lmao

This thread gave me exactly everything I was looking for in reading the thread title, thanks guys.
« Last Edit: January 24, 2012, 06:28:26 PM by luis7glorez »

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #36 on: January 24, 2012, 08:02:49 PM »
You could train for it, but it's probably foolish if you end up tearing something due to overstretching, so best watch yourself.


Offline Lawnmowerman

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Re: Anyone know where I might get hold of a wooden leg?
« Reply #37 on: January 24, 2012, 08:04:18 PM »

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