Topic: Shanklyboy's and Fat Scousers ( Leo who's still alive ) auld arse thread

[jason42]

there was also those chocolate button things covered in hundreds and thousands - only remember them cos they were crap

and them round liquorice things

me mums favourites are dolly mixtures

there was also like a strawberry sherbert lemon thing - sherbert strawberry I guess

flying suacers just tasted like paper didn't they - couldn't be doing with them

me dad used to bring us (me and our kid) home sweets on a friday night when he'd got his wages and had a pint  - spangles or mintolas or munchies or some such but one day he brought back these weird and huge and exotic prospects - all purple and gold wrapping called an Aztec bar - a feast in itself it was - a sugar overload of epic proportions for the skinny runt I was at the time - nowadays kids have sweets coming out there  ears everyday - back then it was an event

Used to love those chocolate things....a friend's sister works in a sweet factory and she got me a huge bag of them but they didn't taste quite how I remember them.....

[BSBW]

Two words

Chocolate logs.

Four words:

Uncle Joe's Mint Balls

[pooley]

Just watched Gattuso's 'headbut' on Joe Jordan, he must have shit himself when Joe didn't collapse on the floor like he had been shot. Just think all these modern footballers must think they have the strength of Garth as they only have to lightly touch an opponent  and they go flying through the air.
Does anyone remember Hobos, a sort of toffee with a streak of flavouring through it, usually bananna or strawberry.

[montysmum]

There was an e-mail going round yesterday about how times have changed towards kids over the years.  It was going on about things like falling over at school and the teacher giving you a hug and making you feel better, or you were given a glass of water if you took your own tablets to school, or the local Bobby giving you a clip around the earhole if you were doing wrong.  Imagine how that would all be viewed now.

Not that I ever got a clip around the ear off the Bobby of course but I did once, only once believe it or not get 2 rulers wrapped round my legs for talking during a television programme at school.  I was only in the Juniors as well and I wouldn’t mind I was only asking my mate a question about the programme cos I couldn’t hear properly because we were sat miles away from the tele on a cold tiled floor in a dingy corridor.  God I hated that teacher, a right bitch she was and not only for giving me a slap either. 

Not my favourites but I did like them and Pineapple Chunks but you had to either just buy 2ozs at a time or eat them rather quickly if you got 4ozs or they’d stick to the bag and you’d have to suck the paper off. 

Oh wow that brings back (sore) memories!

I hated school from beginning to end, never liked a day of it.  In my school the girls would get wacked on the backside with a large man size pump (as in trainer type shoe), the boys would get a really thick wooden ruler on the hand.

If you were ever sent to the head there was a cane on her desk waiting to be used on any kid who was deemed to be worthy.  I got sent to the Head's office a few times.

I used to go there, stand outside the door and then slide the little busy/available sign over so it said busy.  Then went back to class and tell the teacher I couldnt go in.  Got spared a lot of dealings with the cane by doing that.

It was normal practice for the teacher to throw the blackboard cleaner thing (can't remember what it is called) at full pelt at a kid who was chatting.  Bloody hurt if it hit you!  Also we had to stand in the corner, or if the teacher was in a real nark, kneel facing the wall for the lesson,

When I left Secondary School the Deputy Head told me I would never be fit for anything other than scrubbing floors because I was useless - great way to send a kid on their way into the big wide world!

I know people say schooldays are the best days of your life, but, not for me they weren't.

[redtel]

Just watched Gattuso's 'headbut' on Joe Jordan, he must have shit himself when Joe didn't collapse on the floor like he had been shot. Just think all these modern footballers must think they have the strength of Garth as they only have to lightly touch an opponent  and they go flying through the air.
Does anyone remember Hobos, a sort of toffee with a streak of flavouring through it, usually bananna or strawberry.

Remember Hobos, and how about that Anglo bubbly gum which was huge.

Coltsfoot rock was weird but nice.

Get your gnashers around this lot:

http://www.aquarterof.co.uk/?gclid=CPnBote5jKcCFcgf4QodBA25eA

[blert596]

Grab a blackjack, fruit salad flavoured chew
More to choose from, more to chew

Can anyone remember the rest of the words from the advert? it'sbeen gettin on my nerves now its in my head.

Did anyone used to do the ice creams? Walking around Canny with a big box filled with electric ice (brill stuff), the proper ice cream stuff, and loads of  lolly ices that you'd robbed to top up your own money. lolly Ice, not Ice Lolly by the way.

A bit of nostalgia is a wonderful thing.

[stewil007]

It was normal practice for the teacher to throw the blackboard cleaner thing (can't remember what it is called) at full pelt at a kid who was chatting.  Bloody hurt if it hit you!  Also we had to stand in the corner, or if the teacher was in a real nark, kneel facing the wall for the lesson,

Can't remember the name of our chemistry teacher now, but he used to have wing mirrors on his blackboard, so he could watch the class while writing and if anybody was fucking around....bam....the board rubber would hurtle across the room at a rate of knots and usually find its target.....bloody lethal he was.

But as the saying saying goes, once bitten, twice shy....no one ever messed around again and his reputation was legendary

good times

[jason42]

Oh wow that brings back (sore) memories!

I hated school from beginning to end, never liked a day of it.  In my school the girls would get wacked on the backside with a large man size pump (as in trainer type shoe), the boys would get a really thick wooden ruler on the hand.

If you were ever sent to the head there was a cane on her desk waiting to be used on any kid who was deemed to be worthy.  I got sent to the Head's office a few times.

I used to go there, stand outside the door and then slide the little busy/available sign over so it said busy.  Then went back to class and tell the teacher I couldnt go in.  Got spared a lot of dealings with the cane by doing that.

It was normal practice for the teacher to throw the blackboard cleaner thing (can't remember what it is called) at full pelt at a kid who was chatting.  Bloody hurt if it hit you!  Also we had to stand in the corner, or if the teacher was in a real nark, kneel facing the wall for the lesson,

When I left Secondary School the Deputy Head told me I would never be fit for anything other than scrubbing floors because I was useless - great way to send a kid on their way into the big wide world!

I know people say schooldays are the best days of your life, but, not for me they weren't.

The dreaded slipper as we used to call it....my chemistry teacher had a cut down old trainer and he was a former Olympic powerlifter. He only needed a little swipe and your arse would be sore for days....he hit my mate once and he literally ran around the class 3 times. We got our revenge though, just before we left the school. Some of the boys nicked the slipper and threw it on the Science block roof....

[blert596]

I went to St Dominics for secondary school, and my sister went to Columbus. Doms was supposedly, in them days, classed as a better school, but I always wanted to go to columbus and was gutted about having to go to Doms, when most of my mates were at Columbus.

Always remember turning up on my first day there and 3 of us getting the cane of a Mr Corkhill for being late. Our very first introduction was why are you late? Get in there. Hold your hands out. Twat!! I hated the cane, which is kind of strange as it seemed to have an affinity for me.

I got known as Billy Biscuit at school as my mam used to work for jacobs. She used to bring home big plassy bags full of reject Clubs. Ones with none of the biscuit in them, just lovely chocolate bars which I used to hand our at playtime. One thing I always remember is we had Gordon Wests wife who used to teach us recorder. Me nan used to give me loads of grief about being taught by an evertonions missus.

Remember hangin of the back of the bus to get to school? One of my mates (Ian McGrady) fell off and died because of us doing that little stunt. I think we were about 13 at the time.

We had to do an overnight flit to Scotland and the first thing i knew about it was me mam telling me and my sister that we were movin, and to get our stuff ready by tonight. We got loaded into the back of the van with all we could take, at about 3 in the mornin and woke up in Scotland with a new council house to move into. The greatest memory I have about arriving there was me and my sister both in our cool "Lois" straights, (best jeans ever - fact) and everyone looking at us like we were divvies because we wore straits. Took about another 6 months before it started catching on for everyone else.

I loved school. Best years of your life if you knew how to handle them IMO.

[SmithdownAndy]

Just watched Gattuso's 'headbut' on Joe Jordan

Not to worry I've just heard the Met Police have said they're gonna give him an escort through the Broadwater Farm Estate after the return leg

We used to get the slipper as well in Junior School, Mr Dancers slipper, must have been about a size 14 and hurt like hell, I had that a few times. In Secondary School me and 3 of me mates decided to have a competition to see who could get the cane the most times in one term, I came 3rd with about 300 and the lad who won had it about 600, mind you he was a mad get even then.

[Vulmea]

and there were them weird pink shrimp things  and .........lucky bags

also i get looked at as though I'm simple when I say 'lolly ice' nowadays........ok its not just when I say lolly ice but thats the only time I'm fessin up to

nothing is like its used to be especialy italian football - that poor napoli team from the europa are 2nd in the league apparently but Spurs appear to be planning an open top bus tour for beating AC Milan... weird stuff

[The Gulleysucker]

big box filled with electric ice....

Electric Ice! I'd forgotten about that. Frozen Carbon Dioxide.
Sometimes when buying ice cream from the lad on his bike we'd ask him for some and then dash home with it in a hanky, you couldn't hold it as it hurt too much, and drop it in the metal sink and it would bounce around and provide a bit of entertainment. No computer games back then!
Wasn't there some trick with a spoon involving electric ice, it making some kind of noise?

[jason42]

I went to St Dominics for secondary school, and my sister went to Columbus. Doms was supposedly, in them days, classed as a better school, but I always wanted to go to columbus and was gutted about having to go to Doms, when most of my mates were at Columbus.

Always remember turning up on my first day there and 3 of us getting the cane of a Mr Corkhill for being late. Our very first introduction was why are you late? Get in there. Hold your hands out. Twat!! I hated the cane, which is kind of strange as it seemed to have an affinity for me.

I got known as Billy Biscuit at school as my mam used to work for jacobs. She used to bring home big plassy bags full of reject Clubs. Ones with none of the biscuit in them, just lovely chocolate bars which I used to hand our at playtime. One thing I always remember is we had Gordon Wests wife who used to teach us recorder. Me nan used to give me loads of grief about being taught by an evertonions missus.

Remember hangin of the back of the bus to get to school? One of my mates (Ian McGrady) fell off and died because of us doing that little stunt. I think we were about 13 at the time.

We had to do an overnight flit to Scotland and the first thing i knew about it was me mam telling me and my sister that we were movin, and to get our stuff ready by tonight. We got loaded into the back of the van with all we could take, at about 3 in the mornin and woke up in Scotland with a new council house to move into. The greatest memory I have about arriving there was me and my sister both in our cool "Lois" straights, (best jeans ever - fact) and everyone looking at us like we were divvies because we wore straits. Took about another 6 months before it started catching on for everyone else.

I loved school. Best years of your life if you knew how to handle them IMO.

School days eh? . I was a smart kid in a very rough school - it was a boys only secondary school in a very rough part of town. I started smoking when I was about 13 and we would all hang around at the back of the library and smoke but you got in a world of trouble if you were caught. Once, in the 4th year we were on a school Geology/Geography trip and the teacher - Mr Twist caught a few of the boys having a sneaky fag. "If I catch any of you again, you will be in trouble" Quick as a flash I said "So as long as you don't catch us it will be ok then yeah?" He smiled and nodded so we were able to have a fag as long as it was out of his sight so we went ages behind rocks and bushing all having drags like mad off someone's fag.
On another field trip we went down a valley to a lovely beach on the Gower - Three Cliffs Bay. If you crossed some rocks on the side of the bay you came to another small secluded beach. A few of us did that and cam across 2 lovely young ladies around 19 or so sunbathing on the beach. Imagine our delight when we discovered they were sunbathing topless (we were 14 ) ). we went over to speak to them and I offered to rub some lotion on one of the girls. Just when it seemed like we was going to say yes, a few more of the boys came over the rocks and spoilt the moment and the girls quickly covered up and then we all had to leg it back as the tide was coming in.....

[montysmum]

Just remembered I used to love getting a bottle of Cream Soda (think it was green coloured) and adding vanilla ice cream to it.  God that used to be delicious.

Mum used to make her own ice cream, I remember her mixing it in a huge bowl using Dad's electric drill with a paint mixer attachment on it.  Prototype food mixer!

Best ice cream Ive ever tasted

[rusty-la]

We had to do an overnight flit to Scotland and the first thing i knew about it was me mam telling me and my sister that we were movin, and to get our stuff ready by tonight. We got loaded into the back of the van with all we could take, at about 3 in the mornin and woke up in Scotland with a new council house to move into. The greatest memory I have about arriving there was me and my sister both in our cool "Lois" straights, (best jeans ever - fact) and everyone looking at us like we were divvies because we wore straits. Took about another 6 months before it started catching on for everyone else.

I loved school. Best years of your life if you knew how to handle them IMO.

Not sure  if I misread that Blert but why did you have to do one to Scotland?

You're right about Lois straights, i'd forgotten about them, that took me right back.    All the kids in the know were wearing them  back in the early 80's.

[blert596]

Not sure  if I misread that Blert but why did you have to do one to Scotland?

You're right about Lois straights, i'd forgotten about them, that took me right back.    All the kids in the know were wearing them  back in the early 80's.

It was a mam and dad thing mate. I dont really speak to me mam about it, just accepted that it was the way it was and it all worked out. Me mam had been seeing another feller (turned out to be an complete twat. And I mean a complete twat) and cause we'd benn fiddling the leccy/telly etc then my mam just decided that enough was enough. My nan and grandad had already retired up there, and my mams sister was a nurse there. Cant really say why we moved, I've never been arsed to find out the details.

Looking back on it i dont think I ever noticed how little me old man was around. He was a bit of scally to say the least, and was always "away workin" when I was really young. I know he was deffo involved in loads of robberys and that (and rumoured that one was armed) and we always seemed to have loads of stuff/people coming and going through the house. he was always a bit of a ladies man as well according to me mam and some of the older lads I've spoke to since say he was always up for a fling or two. It was just accepted as the norm for us then. I'm not saying it was a bad upbringing for us. God, me and me sister loved it. Not many who loved canny Farm, but we did. I never saw my dad for years then he turned up for me sisters wedding. Not a care in the world about never seeing us, or paying anything to me mam. Its just the way he was. certainly me mam never held it against him, and they got on great together over the wedding period. Until she found out afterwards that he been passing off blank 50s and 20s to everyone. Some things dont change. last I heard he was running a pub down in dover - after being sacked off the cross channel ferries for running a gang of lads who were selling all their own food on the boats instead of the gen stuff. Would be kind of cool to meet up with him again really.

He was a big bluenose though. Everyone on his side was apart from me uncle joe. The best thing he did for us was being on "holiday" when i was born, so my nan and grandad who were both devout reds took me in the annie road from a very young age. And I was spared everlasting humiliation.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mq6VotWoRvg

[Davvo7]

We had a Maths teacher who used the board duster to 'whack' you on the arse. Not only did it hurt but it left a big oblong chalk mark on your arse, so you had to go to the bogs and try and wash your kecks before you went home or you got it "When your father gets home!" Another one of them was a marksman with a bit of chalk, didn't matter where you sat but that bastard could hit you on the head - didn't hurt like the cane, but it stung. The worse one though was when one of them "give you a Sidey". They got hold of your sideburns/sideboards (depending where your from) and then lifted you up. Now that was so painful when it was happening to you, but looked hysterical when it was happening to somebody else - don't know who was the worse sadist to be honest. Their arsenal also included blackboard rulers, a huge PE pump (trainer), bamboo gardening cane - that stung like mad; but the worst one was an old bastard who used to teach at a jesuit school and he had a priests strap. It had a bit of lead sewn into the end of the leather to make it swing faster and therefore hurt more. Evil shit he was.

Mind you, never did me any harm. Anyway, got to rush, don't want to be late for Mistress Tanya Cheeks - she doesn't like it when you're late!

[rusty-la]

It was a mam and dad thing mate. I dont really speak to me mam about it, just accepted that it was the way it was and it all worked out. Me mam had been seeing another feller (turned out to be an complete twat. And I mean a complete twat) and cause we'd benn fiddling the leccy/telly etc then my mam just decided that enough was enough. My nan and grandad had already retired up there, and my mams sister was a nurse there. Cant really say why we moved, I've never been arsed to find out the details.

Looking back on it i dont think I ever noticed how little me old man was around. He was a bit of scally to say the least, and was always "away workin" when I was really young. I know he was deffo involved in loads of robberys and that (and rumoured that one was armed) and we always seemed to have loads of stuff/people coming and going through the house. he was always a bit of a ladies man as well according to me mam and some of the older lads I've spoke to since say he was always up for a fling or two. It was just accepted as the norm for us then. I'm not saying it was a bad upbringing for us. God, me and me sister loved it. Not many who loved canny Farm, but we did. I never saw my dad for years then he turned up for me sisters wedding. Not a care in the world about never seeing us, or paying anything to me mam. Its just the way he was. certainly me mam never held it against him, and they got on great together over the wedding period. Until she found out afterwards that he been passing off blank 50s and 20s to everyone. Some things dont change. last I heard he was running a pub down in dover - after being sacked off the cross channel ferries for running a gang of lads who were selling all their own food on the boats instead of the gen stuff. Would be kind of cool to meet up with him again really.

He was a big bluenose though. Everyone on his side was apart from me uncle joe. The best thing he did for us was being on "holiday" when i was born, so my nan and grandad who were both devout reds took me in the annie road from a very young age. And I was spared everlasting humiliation.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mq6VotWoRvg

Firstly    I actually remember that advert and I bought that record on vinyl for a girlfriend way back when. Made me chuckle watching that again.

Your aul fella's  behaviour  certainly doesnt seem to have affected you or your upbringing. He sounds like he would be a real character to sit with for an afternoon,  downing a few bevvies and swapping stories. You ever thought of tracking the auld rogue down?

[blert596]

I remember a Donna Summer "I feel Love" advert for them as well " I feel lo oooo ooooo is, I feel" sort of one but cant be sure if I'm making it up or not.

I dont think it affected us at all mate. no matter what we were going through, at that age, all we did every day was play out. Then come home for tea and bed.

I remember we had an "uncle" joe who used to do our leccy for us. After we'd had it cut off, he came round and sorted it again. One day when me mam was at work i was talking at the dorr with a couple of my mates when the leccy man came round. Is your leccy workin? Not wantin to be embarassed, or even understanding the trouble it would cause then, I said yeah, and turned the lights on and off to show him. He said nice one and off he went. I told my mam when i got home and all hell broke loose. funny as fuck looking back on it as I remember every detail of running up the stairs with my mam screaming at me and smacking my arse along the way  :-)

I also remember writing "Billy lives here" all over the front of our house in thick crayon. I think it was to impress some girl. Anyway I went back after we left, must have been about 4 years later and you could still see it there. The letters were about a foot high each. Think I got a good smack for that as well.

I was tempted to try and get in touch with my old man. I could do it quite easily really, but never got round to it. I think you're right about the fact he'd have a few good stories to tell. Something I could laugh along with. I certainly dont hold anything against him, and the last time I saw him, probably 20 years ago now, we had a good chat. He said the usual "You'll always be my son" stuff. I said, "You're really just some feller I know a little bit". I think my sister missed having him around more than me. But I remember some escapades with him even when I was a young kid.

I know it wont go down well probably on here but I'm glad we moved away. Dont get me wrong I still love Liverpool, and still refer to it as "When I go home for the match" etc. Fuck, I call the Chaser my local :-(  But at that time I think I was in serious danger of losing my way so to speak. Even then, we were getting mixed up in some stuff that could easily have had very bad outcomings. I'd say 70% of the lads I knocked around with have either done time, are dealing drugs, are addicts, or are part of crews that are pretty serious now. I think even as a kid back then, even though we got up to some low level stuff, i had a pretty decent moral compass and was never entirely happy at how the future looked or my part in it. Easy to say in hindsight though eh.

[kesey]

Three words

Got the munchies

Three words.

Skin up lar.

[24/7]

Three words.

Skin up lar.

Pass the duchy to the left hand side

[kesey]

Pass the duchy to the left hand side

Apparantly, the original version of that said pass the kouchie which meant marijuana, so the had to change it to the duchy or dutchie which is a Jamician cooking pot.
The things you learn on RAWK eh.

Or it could be blag , a bit similar to John Lennon saying that Lucy in The Sky was inspierd by his son Julian's painting.

Anyone?

[Vulmea]

Apparantly, the original version of that said pass the kouchie which meant marijuana, so the had to change it to the duchy or dutchie which is a Jamician cooking pot.
The things you learn on RAWK eh.

Or it could be blag , a bit similar to John Lennon saying that Lucy in The Sky was inspierd by his son Julian's painting.

Anyone?

his son being on LSD at the time presumably....

remember a lad who painted their house one sumner - all the doors and window frames on a promise of a few quid  from his mum

finishes the job and his mum says they're skint  so he  loses it big time threatens all sorts and stormed off

next day his mum comes home and the lad had painted the window panes as well.... all hell to pay for that ... no it wasn't me funny though as long as you weren't living in a house viewing the world through red windows

[Terry de Niro]

My primary school was St. Anne's in Rock Ferry, a very strict Catholic school.
We had Nun's there that would have done a grand job in the SS.
Fucking wicked bitches they were, and if there are such places called heaven and hell, I'm pretty sure they would be in the latter place right now.
If any kid was out of line the whole class would get it. Rulers on the back of the legs, you name it.
If anyone done that to one of my kids now, I would fucking kill them.

The teachers weren't much better, one in particular was not only a bully in the physical sense of the word, but also in the verbal department too.
I remember quite clearly him singling out some poor girl who had a bit of a problem with hygiene and was always crawling with biddies.
His famous threat to the whole class was, he'd make anyone who was naughty sit next to her as a punishment.
Imagine someone getting away with that kind of behaviour today?

[Davvo7]

My primary school was St. Anne's in Rock Ferry, a very strict Catholic school.
We had Nun's there that would have done a grand job in the SS.
Fucking wicked bitches they were, and if there are such places called heaven and hell, I'm pretty sure they would be in the latter place right now.
If any kid was out of line the whole class would get it. Rulers on the back of the legs, you name it.
If anyone done that to one of my kids now, I would fucking kill them.

The teachers weren't much better, one in particular was not only a bully in the physical sense of the word, but also in the verbal department too.
I remember quite clearly him singling out some poor girl who had a bit of a problem with hygiene and was always crawling with biddies.
His famous threat to the whole class was, he'd make anyone who was naughty sit next to her as a punishment.
Imagine someone getting away with that kind of behaviour today?

You look back now and think that the majority of them would be locked up for doing what they did then. I remember a tale of one lad who the teacher threatened to throw out of the window - we believed him too! Mad bastard.

[the 92A]

Loved my school days hated school.  we'd get caned for coming back late from dinner or slippered, had one teacher who was deffo getting off on it, thinking back, he'd get excited making us touch our toes and then battering young lads with a slipper. only thing it bread in me was anger and defiance i'd never let them see it hurt me. Always responded better to teachers who i respected and were alright with us rather than the ones who could only control a class with slippers etc.

[SmithdownAndy]

You look back now and think that the majority of them would be locked up for doing what they did then. I remember a tale of one lad who the teacher threatened to throw out of the window - we believed him too! Mad bastard.

We had a couple like that as well. one Mr Walsh the PE teacher, when he said "I'll launch ye" you did believe him, mind you he looked the part as well, stocky little fucker he was, was only about 5' 8" but with a couple of facial scars, he looked a hard man. I met him a few years later, had a few drinks with him in town and a chat, he recognised me and knew my name, which was a bit of a shock, but he remembered all our little click from school.

I was pissed off though cos he'd gone on to marry the maths teacher, the bastard I was mad on her when I was a kid, no wonder maths was me favourite subject, she was gorgeous  

[Red Power]

Ahhh school days, eh? Bliss.
I was a bit thick at school (still am) in every subject. But perversly, I enjoyed it. 

I was caught fighting with another boy at Primary School, and this old wretch grabbed my hair, hauled my trousers down and whacked me with a stick on the bare arse. In front of all my laughing mates. Put me off S and M in later life though...
At High School they had the tawse, a thick leather strap with the end tips burned and dipped in vinegar. It stung like fuck, man. I remember one arsehole going to hit a really nice teacher when I was fifteen and I ended up getting suspened 'cause I chinned the kid!

A friend recalls a time in a school in Liverpool (can't remember which one) where a sixth former challenged a teacher to an arm wrestling contest. It ended up with with both of them fighting on the floor with the pupil gasping 'help, get the Headmaster!' and the teacher trying to throttle the poor bugger.

Love you all on here
 Keep the stories coming!

[Fat Scouser]

Fuckin batter the lot of them with broken Schofields bottles, the bastards. Might be able to go down for a bevvy on a Saturday night if they were still canning some of the shites... fucking slippers. I'd give them Mr Dancer's golf shoe...

Fucking Mr Dancer's slipper... Was that a bit like Mr Pastry's Pies... Andy, yer a funny bastard and half the time you don't even suss it.

[SmithdownAndy]

What's with these kids nowadays as well, I ain't heard a kid saying "I got caught sagging school" for years, it's all bunking school or jibbing school now, I swear they're trying to change how we used to speak, I know it's been done on here about how slow they speak now as well and it's right, they do.

I was terrible for "sagging school", in my last year I was only in 26 half days, the teacher used to say it must be raining if you're in. Remember the education officer used to come the house if you hadn't been in school for a while, well one day she's coming up the path as I'm going out, so she asks me if I'm in, I said ye love he's in the house and scarpers as quick as I can, well I would've been grounded and I was meeting a girl . Got the hiding of me life when I got home though off me ma.

[JohnnoWhite]

lolly Ice, not Ice Lolly by the way.

A bit of nostalgia is a wonderful thing.

Now I know that in the far Western suburbs of Manchester - out towards Widnes , Runcorn, Speke and Warrington way    they do have a tendency to say lolly ice .........
but I humbly suggest for your consideration when you think constructively abar' it, it's clear that the true descriptor is an ICED lolly.

[Terry de Niro]

Went St. Hugh's high school in Birkenhead.
I was fortunate to play in a cracking football team that was the first Wirral based team to win the Merseyside (inter school) cup.
Anyway, there was a lad called Jimmy Carew who was very much a Souness type of player, hard as nails but loads of skill to go with it.
We were in a PE lesson with a teacher called Ian Liversidge, who much later on got a job with Newcastle as a physio when Kevin Keegan was first in charge there.
He was only about 5 foot 5 but fancied himself as a bit of a hard knock, and when Jimmy was about 13 or 14 Liversidge decided to head-butt him in the nose for pissing about in the lesson.
Proper split his nose open, blood and snot everywhere.
Jimmy turned around to him and said, "before I leave this school, I'll get you back for that".

About a week before we left school, the teachers organised a match against us.
The game was about 30 seconds in when Jimmy proper done Liversidge with a crunching tackle which nearly broke his leg.
Jimmy stood over him Roy Keane style and said, "I fucking told you I'd have you, you twat.."   

[Stigathedump]

Will it be mushrooms, fried onion rings we'll have to wait and see..........oh its chips its chips....its always chip oh chips!!!

[jason42]

You look back now and think that the majority of them would be locked up for doing what they did then. I remember a tale of one lad who the teacher threatened to throw out of the window - we believed him too! Mad bastard.

We had a teacher - Killer Morgan who would walk through the school with his arm tensed and outstretched and his fist clenched. If you didn't move you got hit....

[SmithdownAndy]

Now I know that in the far Western suburbs of Manchester - out towards Widnes , Runcorn, Speke and Warrington way    they do have a tendency to say lolly ice .........
but I humbly suggest for your consideration when you think constructively abar' it, it's clear that the true descriptor is an ICED lolly.

Always said you lot were backward Johnno

Great story that Terry, don't you just love paybacks.

[kopite.keith]

First time I've ever told this to an audience...Oh the shame.
Once got the cane for farting during assembly (honest it's true.) I remember sitting on the floor of the school hall trying to squeeze it out on the sly but only succeeded in sending out a rasper that reverberated along the floorboards all the way up to the stage where the headmaster was leading morning assembly. I'd have got away with it too but for two classmates sitting either side of me (one was Freddie Mac the tw*t) who started pissing themselves laughing. Next thing is King's (the head) finger is pointing at me and telling me to meet him outside his office after assembly, Bastard gave me bloody whack for it...  

[kopite.keith]

Went St. Hugh's high school in Birkenhead.
I was fortunate to play in a cracking football team that was the first Wirral based team to win the Merseyside (inter school) cup.
Anyway, there was a lad called Jimmy Carew who was very much a Souness type of player, hard as nails but loads of skill to go with it.
We were in a PE lesson with a teacher called Ian Liversidge, who much later on got a job with Newcastle as a physio when Kevin Keegan was first in charge there.
He was only about 5 foot 5 but fancied himself as a bit of a hard knock, and when Jimmy was about 13 or 14 Liversidge decided to head-butt him in the nose for pissing about in the lesson.
Proper split his nose open, blood and snot everywhere.
Jimmy turned around to him and said, "before I leave this school, I'll get you back for that".

About a week before we left school, the teachers organised a match against us.
The game was about 30 seconds in when Jimmy proper done Liversidge with a crunching tackle which nearly broke his leg.
Jimmy stood over him Roy Keane style and said, "I fucking told you I'd have you, you twat.."   

Brilliant story.

[JohnnoWhite]

I went to Xaverian College in Manchester and it was situated in Rusholme - now the curry centre of Manchester. One of our teachers Halstead by name (who taught French) rode to work every day on a sit up and beg old black bike that wouldn't look out of place in 'Allo 'Allo, always wore a tie belt mac and I kid you not - a French black beret on his bonce.

His piece de resistance was to tweak yer sideburns to score and one day he was teaching the lower Sixth formers amongst whose ranks was one John Kelly - the schools athletics Victor Ludorum. Kelly affectionately known by all the other lads as "Monster" (obviously he was never around when being referred to as this!! ) won the shotputt, discus, javelin and he was built like a brick shithouse. Now you wouldn't believe it but this one day Kelly got some of Haltsead's set homework wrong and the crazy teacher tweaked Monster's sideburn as a punishment. Well that started it didn't it? Monster grabbed his arm, twisted it up his back and then frogmarched said teacher to the broom cupboard in the corner of the class into which he stuffed said teacher, slammed the doors and shoved two brushes through the handles to keep it closed. He turned to the class of 16 year olds and said"Anyone who let's him out answers to me" -and then he departed the class and bogged off home.

Someone nipped out to report to the authorities all was not well and a rescue party came across and released Halstead from the cupboard.

A couple of years later, the Manchester Evening News carried the story that someone shot the same teacher in the face with an air rifle during morning assembly. And this was one of the only two Catholic Grammar schools in Manchester (the other was and still is St. Bedes)

[Davvo7]

Its no wonder the people who post in this thread are the way they are is it!!!!

The mods will have to start advertising a phone number for people to ring if they have been "affected by the posts in this evenings thread".

[Willi]

There were also gooduns. The deputy head as I was in the 6th form in 71-72 had a really strict reputation. we had him for chemistry 2 days a week straight after lunch. Well, we liked going to the pub for lunch (liquid lunch, no money for food). He used to come into the room. sniff the air and say ' could you move the desks back a bit please'