Author Topic: Ki-Jana Hoever (Read 87285 times)

Jake · « **Reply #40 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:11:28 pm »

Quote from: hassinator on January 4, 2019, 06:24:43 pm

cheer up, tepid, you're not a mod in here

Did hope there'd be a Klopp quote in there somewhere mind

So… Howard Philips · « **Reply #41 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:14:28 pm »

Quote from: Dr. Beaker on January 4, 2019, 07:11:03 pm

mI admire people who take personal hygiene so seriously.

It is a well known medical emergency!!! Documented in proper doctor books!!

Vacuum cleaner injury to penis: a common urologic problem?
Benson RC Jr.
Abstract

Erotic stimulation by the use of vacuum cleaners or electric brooms appears to be a common form of masturbation. Unfortunately, and contrary to apparent public appreciation, injury due to this form of autostimulation may not be unusual. Five cases of significant penile trauma resulting from this form of masturbation are presented, with a spectrum of severe injuries, including loss of the glans penis.

TepidT2O · « **Reply #42 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:16:00 pm »

I think it’s pronounced something like Hurver...

Dr. Beaker · « **Reply #43 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:18:44 pm »

Quote from: So... Howard Phillips on January 4, 2019, 07:14:28 pm

It is a well known medical emergency!!! Documented in proper doctor books!!

Vacuum cleaner injury to penis: a common urologic problem?
Benson RC Jr.
Abstract

Erotic stimulation by the use of vacuum cleaners or electric brooms appears to be a common form of masturbation. Unfortunately, and contrary to apparent public appreciation, injury due to this form of autostimulation may not be unusual. Five cases of significant penile trauma resulting from this form of masturbation are presented, with a spectrum of severe injuries, including loss of the glans penis.

You make it sound like a bad thing. I guess I've just always been lucky.

Dr. Beaker · « **Reply #44 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:20:06 pm »

Quote from: Tepid T₂O on January 4, 2019, 07:16:00 pm

I think it’s pronounced something like Hurver...

So Its not Paisley saying Hoover, it's Lawrenson.

Goalposts for Jumpers · « **Reply #45 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:28:21 pm »

Quote from: AmanShah21 on January 4, 2019, 06:48:13 pm

Is it pronounce "Hoover" or "Whoever" or "Hoy-ver"?

Seen a couple of his youth game compilations. Looks calm but a bit lightweight in my opinion for the league. A bit like Joe when he started so there's potential. Doesn't look like a touchline hugger but has a decent pass on him. We'll see how it goes if he does start but he's got to be a massive talent to get a start at his age.

No, you need the special extension for that

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #46 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:30:59 pm »

Quote from: Dr. Beaker on January 4, 2019, 07:20:06 pm

So Its not Paisley saying Hoover, it's Lawrenson.

Eeyore · « **Reply #47 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:32:09 pm »

Quote from: So... Howard Phillips on January 4, 2019, 07:03:56 pm

I take it you are referring to a friend of yours, who whilst operating a hand held hoover clad only in his dressing gown had the misfortune to catch the tip if his penis in the nozzle and had to be taken to A&E.

That "misuse"?

That is the one.

royhendo · « **Reply #48 on:** January 4, 2019, 07:39:51 pm »

Quote from: Al 555 on January 4, 2019, 07:32:09 pm

That is the one.

Vax the one indeed.

KurtVerbose · « **Reply #49 on:** January 4, 2019, 08:02:42 pm »

Quote from: BIG DICK NICK on January 4, 2019, 06:22:21 pm

How do you pronounce his surname? Like Ian Paisley saying “However”?

My girlfriend's Dutch and she says it's just like the vacuum cleaner manufacturer / US President (1929-33) / Dam / Head of the FBI and transvestite.

Dr. Beaker · « **Reply #50 on:** January 4, 2019, 08:06:57 pm »

Quote from: KurtVerbose on January 4, 2019, 08:02:42 pm

My girlfriend's Dutch and she says it's just like the vacuum cleaner manufacturer / US President (1929-33) / Dam / Head of the FBI and transvestite.

Christ. It's a bit of a mouthful isn't it - bloody dutchies.

royhendo · « **Reply #51 on:** January 4, 2019, 10:00:35 pm »

Quote from: Dr. Beaker on January 4, 2019, 08:06:57 pm

Christ. It's a bit of a mouthful isn't it - bloody dutchies.

He’s prone to wandering into the middle of the park I heard. Not that hard to pass the Dutchie ‘pon the left hand side.

CHOPPER · « **Reply #52 on:** January 4, 2019, 10:47:32 pm »

Related to Chris Eubank.

True story.

John C · « **Reply #53 on:** January 4, 2019, 11:08:17 pm »

Quote from: CHOPPER on January 4, 2019, 10:47:32 pm

Related to Chris Eubank.

True story.

Classic Chops.

End Product · « **Reply #54 on:** January 5, 2019, 12:20:29 am »

There was that episode of game on where he lashes his member in the hoover.

SlowRap · « **Reply #55 on:** January 5, 2019, 12:21:34 am »

he's got the pace to leave em for dust but he needs to brush up on his skills if he's to get into them tricky corners

him_15 · « **Reply #56 on:** January 5, 2019, 12:25:45 am »

Really looking forward to his debut.

hitnrock · « **Reply #57 on:** January 5, 2019, 08:25:36 am »

He has to play at CB & Rafa at RB, right? Who's play the second CB?

phil236849 · « **Reply #58 on:** January 5, 2019, 08:42:37 am »

Sung to the tune of the Vieira song

Ki Jana o o o o
Ki jana o o o o
He comes from Amsterdam
Your strikers become a lamb

Coat...?

Edit: change last line to “He”ll Hoever up your man”

Simples!

Iska · « **Reply #59 on:** January 5, 2019, 08:58:08 am »

Quote from: hassinator on January 4, 2019, 06:15:06 pm

'we've got the sweetest jan hoever...' to the tune of:

(first dance at my wedding )

This. Love the idea of the kop ad-libbing for five minutes during the coda.

Syntexity · « **Reply #60 on:** January 5, 2019, 09:15:01 am »

In many cases they pronounce v as f in Holland, so going by that logic his name is pronounced Hoofer or possibly Heffer, whatever fits better.

phil236849 · « **Reply #61 on:** January 5, 2019, 09:34:04 am »

Quote from: Syntexity on January 5, 2019, 09:15:01 am

In many cases they pronounce v as f in Holland, so going by that logic his name is pronounced Hoofer or possibly Heffer, whatever fits better.

I remember once reading Molby was pronounced Molboo, but it didn’t stick...

gjr1 · « **Reply #62 on:** January 5, 2019, 09:52:23 am »

I guess he can’t play as a Sweeper then?

sminp · « **Reply #63 on:** January 5, 2019, 09:52:42 am »

Quote from: phil236849 on January 5, 2019, 09:34:04 am

I remember once reading Molby was pronounced Molboo, but it didn’t stick...

Sounds like he’d have been better suited to Everton

I've been a good boy · « **Reply #64 on:** January 5, 2019, 10:19:07 am »

Can't wait to see him play alongside Virgil Van Dyson, they'll make a good partnership

BarryCrocker · « **Reply #65 on:** January 5, 2019, 10:24:01 am »

Wolves forwards won't be able to survive in a vacuum.

Nobby Reserve · « **Reply #66 on:** January 5, 2019, 10:38:38 am »

We need a song for Hoever

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #67 on:** January 5, 2019, 11:01:46 am »

Quote from: Nobby Reserve on January 5, 2019, 10:38:38 am

We need a song for Hoever

Alisson too

cdav · « **Reply #68 on:** January 5, 2019, 11:23:07 am »

Nice to have a young lad come into the squad to provide competition with Trent. Good balance between a young hungry player and an experienced veteran

Malaysian Kopite · « **Reply #69 on:** January 5, 2019, 12:00:09 pm »

We must be one of the best clubs at producing/spotting young full backs. Since Rafa's overhaul we've had Flanagan, Kelly, Wisdom, Trent, Gomez, Mclaughlin and Robinson all come through playing those positions.

spider-neil · « **Reply #70 on:** January 5, 2019, 12:09:00 pm »

We've got the sweetest Jan Hoever we don't want to get over.

royhendo · « **Reply #71 on:** January 5, 2019, 12:18:20 pm »

https://youtu.be/spefM2OjKp4

H-F-U-H-R-U-H-U-R-R.

redmark · « **Reply #72 on:** January 5, 2019, 12:19:51 pm »

Quote from: royhendo on January 5, 2019, 12:18:20 pm

https://youtu.be/spefM2OjKp4

H-F-U-H-R-U-H-U-R-R.

Have you seen a doctor?

Nice to see you back here, BTW

.

hassinator · « **Reply #73 on:** January 5, 2019, 01:17:09 pm »

David Maddock
‏
Verified account

@MaddockMirror
9m9 minutes ago
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Klopp says 16 year old Ki-Jana Hoever is a hugely exciting talent, and says he hasn't decided yet if he can play against Wolves. "Now Jana is in (first team) training, it is a joy to watch him, an incredibly confident young fella." #LFC

0 replies 16 retweets 81 likes
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David Lynch
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@LynchStandard
12m12 minutes ago
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Klopp on Ki-Jana Hoever: "He's one for the future. If Joel and Joe were fit all the time then Ki-Jana would not have been in training but he has been in and it's a joy to watch him. He is in, he learns a lot, improves a lot."

hassinator · « **Reply #74 on:** January 5, 2019, 01:17:39 pm »

Quote from: royhendo on January 5, 2019, 12:18:20 pm

https://youtu.be/spefM2OjKp4

H-F-U-H-R-U-H-U-R-R.

ha ha ha - i was looking for that one. bravo big man

hassinator · « **Reply #75 on:** January 5, 2019, 01:29:54 pm »

Quote from: Nobby Reserve on January 5, 2019, 10:38:38 am

We need a song for Hoever

needs to be to the tune of 'love hangover'

<a href="https://www.youtube.com/v/zNt92c0OGN8" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" class="bbc_link bbc_flash_disabled new_win">https://www.youtube.com/v/zNt92c0OGN8</a>

spider-neil · « **Reply #76 on:** January 5, 2019, 01:30:34 pm »

Really hoping he starts now.

Dr. Beaker · « **Reply #77 on:** January 5, 2019, 01:37:45 pm »

Quote from: spider-neil on January 5, 2019, 01:30:34 pm

Really hoping he starts now.

But he'll be fucked by kick-off time.

TepidT2O · « **Reply #78 on:** January 5, 2019, 01:39:50 pm »

He won’t be on the squad now will he!

classycarra · « **Reply #79 on:** January 5, 2019, 01:50:40 pm »

Quote from: Tepid T₂O on January 5, 2019, 01:39:50 pm

He won’t be on the squad now will he!

You think you've been sucked in?