I Still can't talk about it after 35 years it's all bottled up inside still
I still have nightmares leading to sleepless nights /Flashbacks / Paranoia /
I breakdown every time I hear You'll never walk alone
I'll leave it there as it is even hard to type about it
I know there is not much I can say that will help, but it took until the publication of the HIP report for me to accept I needed to do something...... I guess I always knew, but it wasn't until the aftermath of the HIP report I accepted it. Eventually got to see a, I guess, psychologist or something like that.
I think most people on here realise how hard it is to verbally talk about things - even though played them through in your mind millions of times, actually saying them out load to someone else, was unbelievably difficult. You try and speak, but no sound comes out.
Anyway, sorry.... waffling here - I did find it helped after. I am not for a moment saying it makes everything go away, and there aren't still difficult times, and I don't know if it's right for everyone.... but if you haven't had that kind of help, it might be worth a try.
Really hope you find something that helps with this.