Author Topic: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread  (Read 1009989 times)

Offline El Lobo

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12600 on: May 26, 2021, 12:42:20 pm »
Until now, I wanted to stop. Now I don't want to stop. I want to start again.

HOW DO I STOP MYSELF FROM NOT WANTING TO STOP?!  :butt

This is new territory.

Absolutely awful news mate, but they've ruined enough lives already.
If he's being asked to head the ball too frequently - which isn't exactly his specialty - it could affect his ear and cause an infection. Especially if the ball hits him on the ear directly.

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12601 on: June 1, 2021, 08:04:18 am »
Absolutely awful news mate, but they've ruined enough lives already.
Thanks mate, that helped.

Today is four months without a drop.

This evening I have been invited to the opening of a fancy restaurant in Tallinn - I helped create their 'story' as part of their brand launch. Not sure if I'll raise a glass of something or not. The interesting thing about that relates to the last time I did this in 2018 (3 months) - on June 1st 2018, I had my first drink and I posted about how little I enjoyed it - back then it was something I had been longing for, counting down to, thinking of it as a reward.....

This time I don't.

This time is different.

This time, I feel much freer to make that choice - cos that's exactly what it is.

Maybe I'll try it and, like three years ago, simply not enjoy it?

Maybe I'll decide on the spot that I don't want to, because I'm now better able to distinguish between "want" and "need"?

Maybe I'll get totally slaughtered? Maybe not.......

Either way, thanks at least in part to this thread, I went 4 months. And it feels good.

Offline Slightly Less Mediocre Baron Bennekov

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12602 on: June 1, 2021, 04:58:40 pm »
Thanks mate, that helped.

Today is four months without a drop.

This evening I have been invited to the opening of a fancy restaurant in Tallinn - I helped create their 'story' as part of their brand launch. Not sure if I'll raise a glass of something or not. The interesting thing about that relates to the last time I did this in 2018 (3 months) - on June 1st 2018, I had my first drink and I posted about how little I enjoyed it - back then it was something I had been longing for, counting down to, thinking of it as a reward.....

This time I don't.

This time is different.

This time, I feel much freer to make that choice - cos that's exactly what it is.

Maybe I'll try it and, like three years ago, simply not enjoy it?

Maybe I'll decide on the spot that I don't want to, because I'm now better able to distinguish between "want" and "need"?

Maybe I'll get totally slaughtered? Maybe not.......

Either way, thanks at least in part to this thread, I went 4 months. And it feels good.

You can do it mate! I know you can. :scarf

Offline L4Red

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12603 on: June 10, 2021, 07:53:51 pm »
6 months today  :D

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12604 on: June 10, 2021, 08:40:45 pm »
6 months today  :D
Woohoooo!!!!!! Great going that. Well done!

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12605 on: June 10, 2021, 08:41:07 pm »
You can do it mate! I know you can. :scarf
Still not had one......

Offline Slightly Less Mediocre Baron Bennekov

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12606 on: June 16, 2021, 04:29:03 pm »
Still not had one......

Nigh swan!!  8)

Extremely busy here these days with the European Champs and students graduating, so we're literally working around the clock these days. It's nice to finally earn my own money again. :scarf

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12607 on: July 1, 2021, 09:48:35 pm »
Lost another friend this week to what appears to have been the demon drink (I hope it's not - but all the signs were there - am surprised he lasted as long as he did - he was in a bad way last time we met.......)

Going through that whole, "I wish I'd done more!" thing. Again. But the sad truth is Sean pushed away all the help whilst at the same time begging for it......such a tortured soul and such a lovely man.

He was my mentor in 1995 and I was his shadow in 1996 - without him I would not have become a coach and trainer. I owe him my career........

Rest In Peace you fucking mad twat  :'(

Offline Pheeny

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12608 on: July 2, 2021, 10:52:39 pm »
Lost another friend this week to what appears to have been the demon drink (I hope it's not - but all the signs were there - am surprised he lasted as long as he did - he was in a bad way last time we met.......)

Going through that whole, "I wish I'd done more!" thing. Again. But the sad truth is Sean pushed away all the help whilst at the same time begging for it......such a tortured soul and such a lovely man.

He was my mentor in 1995 and I was his shadow in 1996 - without him I would not have become a coach and trainer. I owe him my career........

Rest In Peace you fucking mad twat  :'(
Seen your Facebook post, never realised it was drink related. Thoughts with you Jim. Stay strong and live long and prosper.

Offline spen71

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12609 on: July 3, 2021, 11:10:35 pm »
Sat in a hospital room at the moment.    My mum had multiple organ failure.   Only a matter of time now.    The drink finally took her.    Frankly I’m surprised she lasted this long.     Definitely going to stop drinking for good after watching this

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12610 on: July 3, 2021, 11:13:30 pm »
Sat in a hospital room at the moment.    My mum had multiple organ failure.   Only a matter of time now.    The drink finally took her.    Frankly I’m surprised she lasted this long.     Definitely going to stop drinking for good after watching this
I’m so sorry mate….

Awful news…
“Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”
“Generosity always pays off. Generosity in your effort, in your work, in your kindness, in the way you look after people and take care of people. In the long run, if you are generous with a heart, and with humanity, it always pays off.”
W

Offline spen71

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12611 on: July 4, 2021, 01:27:51 am »
I’m so sorry mate….

Awful news…

Thanks mate.    Certainly opens your eyes the damage the drink does.    Kidneys have failed and they have stopped all treatment apart from pain relief.     She also has korsakoff  syndrome,   Since my dad died last year she has been on self destruct mode

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12612 on: July 4, 2021, 06:44:56 am »
So sorry to read this Spen. We're all here for you....

Offline reddebs

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12613 on: July 4, 2021, 08:22:40 am »
Sat in a hospital room at the moment.    My mum had multiple organ failure.   Only a matter of time now.    The drink finally took her.    Frankly I’m surprised she lasted this long.     Definitely going to stop drinking for good after watching this

That's terrible news mate....

Offline Slippers

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12614 on: July 4, 2021, 10:01:06 am »
Thanks mate.    Certainly opens your eyes the damage the drink does.    Kidneys have failed and they have stopped all treatment apart from pain relief.     She also has korsakoff  syndrome,   Since my dad died last year she has been on self destruct mode

Sorry to hear this,our friend's widow has Korsakoff Syndrome.She was put in a nursing home six years' ago at the age of fifty four.

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12615 on: July 4, 2021, 08:18:08 pm »
Really sorry to hear that Spen mate.

Offline AndyInVA

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12616 on: July 7, 2021, 12:33:51 pm »
Sat in a hospital room at the moment.    My mum had multiple organ failure.   Only a matter of time now.    The drink finally took her.    Frankly I’m surprised she lasted this long.     Definitely going to stop drinking for good after watching this

I'm sorry mate. Can't be easy. It is good that you are a good son and with her at the end. Those moments in life are very important.

Offline rob1966

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12617 on: July 7, 2021, 12:43:22 pm »
Sat in a hospital room at the moment.    My mum had multiple organ failure.   Only a matter of time now.    The drink finally took her.    Frankly I’m surprised she lasted this long.     Definitely going to stop drinking for good after watching this

Sorry to hear that mate.
Jurgen, you made us laugh, you made us cry, you made Liverpool a bastion of invincibilty, now leave us on a high - YNWA

Offline spen71

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12618 on: July 7, 2021, 12:51:38 pm »
Thanks everyone.   She passed away at 8am this morning.   Out of her pain and misery now

Offline reddebs

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12619 on: July 7, 2021, 12:57:53 pm »
Thanks everyone.   She passed away at 8am this morning.   Out of her pain and misery now

Thinking of you and the family Spen 💔

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12620 on: July 7, 2021, 01:19:29 pm »
Thanks everyone.   She passed away at 8am this morning.   Out of her pain and misery now

Sorry for your loss Spen. RIP

Offline rob1966

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12621 on: July 7, 2021, 01:33:31 pm »
Sorry to hear that Spen.

RIP
Jurgen, you made us laugh, you made us cry, you made Liverpool a bastion of invincibilty, now leave us on a high - YNWA

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12622 on: July 7, 2021, 01:53:01 pm »
Oh that’s so very sad.

My sincerest commiserations Spen
“Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”
“Generosity always pays off. Generosity in your effort, in your work, in your kindness, in the way you look after people and take care of people. In the long run, if you are generous with a heart, and with humanity, it always pays off.”
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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12623 on: July 7, 2021, 02:15:27 pm »
Thanks everyone.   She passed away at 8am this morning.   Out of her pain and misery now
Condolences Spen - as you say, out of the pain now. YNWA. <3

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12624 on: July 7, 2021, 03:59:50 pm »
Sorry to hear that spen, stay strong for yourself mate.

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12625 on: July 7, 2021, 06:22:18 pm »
Condolences Spen - as you say, out of the pain now. YNWA. <3
It was my conciliation when my brother died.
“Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”
“Generosity always pays off. Generosity in your effort, in your work, in your kindness, in the way you look after people and take care of people. In the long run, if you are generous with a heart, and with humanity, it always pays off.”
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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12626 on: July 10, 2021, 07:11:42 am »
My sincere condolences, Spen.

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12627 on: July 11, 2021, 07:07:01 am »
Thank you everyone.    I’ll be organising the funeral tomorrow, then it will be time to move on.   Got my two daughters to think about

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12628 on: July 16, 2021, 03:27:25 am »
Thank you everyone.    Got my two daughters to think about

Thankfully my daughter was the reason I stayed strong. Tough days ahead and I hope only the best for you.

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12629 on: August 18, 2021, 01:14:44 pm »
Well, it took him 7 and a half years after the last attempt (which broke the banisters) but this time he succeeded.

This morning, my father hanged himself after drinking three bottles of vodka and cutting his arms open.

He is out of his pain and his suffering.

As the eldest of his 3 offspring, it falls upon me to make arrangements.

The demon drink.

Carl, then Sean, then me da.

Don't know what else to say other than I've been there for some of youse over the years here - now it's my turn....

 :'(

Offline Charlie Adams fried egg

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12630 on: August 18, 2021, 01:31:20 pm »
Fucking hell, so sorry.
Reading that genuinely shocked me. I've seen some of your posts about your dad's battle with the drink.

As you say, you've helped loads of people over the years, so I'm sure there'll be loads of support, but if there's any way I can help please feel free to pm.

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12631 on: August 18, 2021, 01:43:05 pm »
Bloody hell Jim, so sorry mate.

Offline rob1966

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12632 on: August 18, 2021, 02:00:45 pm »
Well, it took him 7 and a half years after the last attempt (which broke the banisters) but this time he succeeded.

This morning, my father hanged himself after drinking three bottles of vodka and cutting his arms open.

He is out of his pain and his suffering.

As the eldest of his 3 offspring, it falls upon me to make arrangements.

The demon drink.

Carl, then Sean, then me da.

Don't know what else to say other than I've been there for some of youse over the years here - now it's my turn....

 :'(

Fucking hell mate, so so sorry to hear that.

You know we'll all do what we can to give you whatever support you need.
Jurgen, you made us laugh, you made us cry, you made Liverpool a bastion of invincibilty, now leave us on a high - YNWA

Offline El Lobo

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12633 on: August 18, 2021, 02:03:22 pm »
So sorry to hear Jim
If he's being asked to head the ball too frequently - which isn't exactly his specialty - it could affect his ear and cause an infection. Especially if the ball hits him on the ear directly.

Offline reddebs

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12634 on: August 18, 2021, 02:03:55 pm »
Always here if you need anything Jim.

Thinking of you and your extended family mate 💔

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12635 on: August 18, 2021, 02:10:08 pm »
So sorry for your loss Jim.

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12636 on: August 18, 2021, 02:13:00 pm »
Well, it took him 7 and a half years after the last attempt (which broke the banisters) but this time he succeeded.

This morning, my father hanged himself after drinking three bottles of vodka and cutting his arms open.

He is out of his pain and his suffering.

As the eldest of his 3 offspring, it falls upon me to make arrangements.

The demon drink.

Carl, then Sean, then me da.

Don't know what else to say other than I've been there for some of youse over the years here - now it's my turn....

 :'(
Jim, I’m so so sorry, I really am.

This is exactly what my brother did.  It was such a shock when it happened, but also not a surprise.

My consolation was that he was no longer a burden to my mum and dad and that he no longer had to suffer as he so obviously did.

Jim, as hard as it may seem at this time, take time to look after yourself. There’s so much to do, to sort and as the eldest you will bear the burden.  But you need to make a point of looking after you.

So sad mate.
“Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”
“Generosity always pays off. Generosity in your effort, in your work, in your kindness, in the way you look after people and take care of people. In the long run, if you are generous with a heart, and with humanity, it always pays off.”
W

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12637 on: August 18, 2021, 02:22:12 pm »

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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12638 on: August 18, 2021, 02:28:47 pm »
Deeply sorry, Jim :(
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Re: Alcohol Issues - The Carl van Riel Memorial Thread
« Reply #12639 on: August 18, 2021, 02:35:42 pm »
24*7. Simply don't know what to say as imagining you having to deal with the simple mechanics of having to deal with your father in that state and then having to arrange the funeral.

I have a feeling these days will be the easy days as you will be very busy. The tough times will be the days after when you are alone with your thoughts and everything spins around in your head.

I'm really sorry and only hope that you and your wider family find peace in the months ahead.