Topic: The Laugh at Manchester United Thread or the 'Ban Thread' for idiots....?.

[mersey_paradiso]

Just watched another famous European victory against the mighty Anderlecht - what a win for Midtable United !!

And what the fuck is that banner - "European Capital of Trophies" ??!!



They've won fuck all in Europe, especially considering the amount of money they've spent on players.

[Alan B'Stard]

Unvincibles

Unconvincibles

[dangerpuss]

Jamie Jackson writing his usual bullshit in the Guardian. Apparently Ibrahimovic's injury is a "slice of good luck". Obviously he couldn't be arsed to look at their fixture list, lazy hack.

[Son of Spion]

Just watched another famous European victory against the mighty Anderlecht - what a win for Midtable United !!

And what the fuck is that banner - "European Capital of Trophies" ??!!



They've won fuck all in Europe, especially considering the amount of money they've spent on players.

Bloody Hell. Have they really still got that banner up? 
That was a dig at us when Liverpool was Capital of Culture in 2008. Surely that's an old picture and they haven't still got it up 9 years later. 

As far as Europe is concerned, considering their wealth and the amount of years they've been trying, their European record is pretty dreadful. They are only one (EC) trophy ahead of Nottingham Forest. Their best years and best manager have gone, and they never managed to dominate Europe even at the height of their powers. 

[mersey_paradiso]

Bloody Hell. Have they really still got that banner up? 
That was a dig at us when Liverpool was Capital of Culture in 2008. Surely that's an old picture and they haven't still got it up 9 years later. 

As far as Europe is concerned, considering their wealth and the amount of years they've been trying, their European record is pretty dreadful. They are only one trophy ahead of Nottingham Forest. Their best years and best manager have gone, and they never managed to dominate Europe even at the height of their powers. 

That is an old photo yes , but it was definitely up on display tonight.

EDIT : here ya go !! 

[Crosby Nick]

They might be about to become only the second English team to win all three UEFA competitions though, alongside those other European giants Chelsea.  The pair of c*nts.

Who's best placed to beat them? Over two legs or in a one off final?

[DangerScouse]

They might be about to become only the second English team to win all three UEFA competitions though, alongside those other European giants Chelsea.  The pair of c*nts.

Who's best placed to beat them? Over two legs or in a one off final?

Not our problem we were rarely in that now defunct trophy, because we were too busy winning leagues and contesting the European Cup.

Lyon.

[idontknow]

Unconvincibles

The Unconvicingibles.

Almost 30 games, if you forget the Hull game which they apparently won anyway, of Unconvicingibleness, ManMou dominate the headlines again all over the world. The star-studded​ side, the most expensively assembled team of footballing aristocrats of all time, anywhere, overpowered Belgian powerhouse Anderlecht with a goal by Marcus Rashford, who cost nothing. But he is still great. After the match the cowed Anderlecht boss admitted there could have been more goals, but for the United goalie, while Jose Mourinho, the current legal occupier of the Manchester United hotseat, admitted he had not and would not pay a TV licence as his he found his team too to depressing to watch, and that anyway, at the Lowry, his current choice of exile, there is a good range of sci-fi to give him new ideas.

[Crosby Nick]

Not our problem we were rarely in that now defunct trophy, because we were too busy winning leagues and contesting the European Cup.

Lyon.

Oh I know, still mildly irritating though. But hopefully won't come to that. They seem to make heavy weather of every game and Lyon do look threatening.

[Son of Spion]

That is an old photo yes , but it was definitely up on display tonight.

EDIT : here ya go !! 

Bloody hell.   

*shakes head*

[mersey_paradiso]

They might be about to become only the second English team to win all three UEFA competitions though, alongside those other European giants Chelsea.  The pair of c*nts.

Who's best placed to beat them? Over two legs or in a one off final?

They're all still way behind the European masters though...


European trophy hauls by English teams (top 5) :

Liverpool :               8 (5 European Cups, 3 UEFA Cups)
Man United :            4 (3 European Cups, 1 CWC)
Nottingham Forest:  2 (2 European Cups)
Chelsea :                 4 (1 European Cup, 1 UEFA, 2 CWC)
Aston Villa :             1 (1 European Cup)

Then you've got Arsenal, Spurs, City, Newcastle, Leeds, Ipswich, West Ham and Everton who've all won one or two UEFA/CWC/Inter cities Fairs Cups.

[Frizzo]

Mourinho added: "They have to be brave now. If it was me, it [returning from injury] would be tomorrow.

"It is time for Jones and Smalling to be brave, to risk, because for the team we have to do everything. That is the way we think.

"We cannot do miracles. Miracles I don't expect - but you have to try to do everything to accelerate the process.

"They cannot make miracles. They are injured and they cannot make Sunday.

"They cannot do miracles but with a special spirit, instead of coming back mid-May you can come back at the beginning of May. They could accelerate the process."

--------------------

He's such a penis.

[mc_red22]

Yet Rene Meulensteen was calling him an amazing man manager on whatever shite station I was listening to this morning . He's got to be one of the worst.

I bet he won't be telling Ibrahimovic to be brave and to come back from his injury tomorrow like he is with Jones & Smalling. Wanker.

[elbow]

The Unconvicingibles.

Almost 30 games, if you forget the Hull game which they apparently won anyway........

And the Chelsea cup defeat.

[jooneyisdagod]

Jamie Jackson writing his usual bullshit in the Guardian. Apparently Ibrahimovic's injury is a "slice of good luck". Obviously he couldn't be arsed to look at their fixture list, lazy hack.

Jamie Jackson must have learning difficulties. I've run out of reasonable explanations for the shit he writes.

[cptrios]

If Ibra's done for the season that's obviously a big blow - but seriously, looking at the remaining opponents, you'd have to think they're favorites for the cup, no? Either way we'd better damn well have our sights set on 3rd rather than 4th.

[rickardinho1]

If Ibra's done for the season that's obviously a big blow - but seriously, looking at the remaining opponents, you'd have to think they're favorites for the cup, no? Either way we'd better damn well have our sights set on 3rd rather than 4th.

It would actually be better for them to win the EL than finishing 4th, given that the winners of the EL go straight into the CL group stage without needing to qualify.

Hoping that they drop some points at Burnley and then beat City, that would be ideal for us.

[GreatEx]

Hoping that they drop some points at Burnley and then beat City, that would be ideal for us.

Surely a draw against City is best for us - the fewer points that go around, the better.

They seem to be back to drawing form after that blip against Sunderland and Chelsea; hope they can keep it up despite the injuries.

[rickardinho1]

Surely a draw against City is best for us - the fewer points that go around, the better.

They seem to be back to drawing form after that blip against Sunderland and Chelsea; hope they can keep it up despite the injuries.

Depends on the Burnely-United result...

If United drop points against Burnley then the best result in City-United would be a United win, as that would put us in the driving seat for 3rd.

Also, even though United do appear to be in touch now, I can't see them beating both Arsenal and Spurs away with a EL semifinal prior to both those games either, so I think we'll be comfortably ahead of them after gameweek 37.

What it all comes down to is our results though. Just got to beat Palace to turn up the pressure on both City and United for their midweek game.

[Something Worse]

Jamie Jackson must have learning difficulties. I've run out of reasonable explanations for the shit he writes.

Click bait.

[Nitramdorf]

I hate them, they are shit, I hate him he is a shit. I feel a bit better now.

[Lush is the best medicine...]

Jamie Jackson must have learning difficulties. I've run out of reasonable explanations for the shit he writes.

probably gets two paycheques

[rocco]

Brilliant. They lose their top goalscorer, and Rojo on top of Smalling and Jones who are pretty much out for the season. And they are about to enter a nightmare of fixtures.

23.04. Burnley (away)
27.04. Man City (away)
30.04. Swansea (home)
04.05. Europa League semi-finals
06.05. Arsenal (away)
11.05. Europa League semi-finals
13.05. Tottenham (away)
17.05. Southampton (away)
21.05. Crystal Palace (home)
24.05. Europa League final

Expecting one of jones or smalling to be rushed back not 100%

[The Istvan Kozma Fan Club]

Never underestimate Mourinho, BR did and payed the ultimate price.

[Felch Aid]

Savage was getting very excited last night.

Rashford - world class.

Deary me. Do they ever learn?

[jediwarrior]

Mourinho really is in a catch 22 now. He knows injuries are mounting up and the team with the fixture list pile up is going to be pretty stretch.
He can't put all his eggs in one basket with the Europa League as we all know anything can happen over a 90 min final or a tough 2 leg tie.
He knows if he wins games in hand then they're level points with us and right on City's coat tails so he also has to play his best 11 in the league and well for the moment until they lose one or two and then gives up on it. I think if they lost against Chelsea last week he would have thrown in the towel with the league.

Got a feeling the whole season going to blow up in their faces very soon. Away games against Arsenal and Spurs after the semi finals if injuries keep happening he be asking ticket tout to play in midfield for him  .

Going to enjoy the next few weeks and his melt down over the fixture list when it all goes wrong.

[zero zero]

Ha ha, Basil Fawlty wannabe twat.

fucking hell

[rickardinho1]

Mourinho really is in a catch 22 now. He knows injuries are mounting up and the team with the fixture list pile up is going to be pretty stretch.
He can't put all his eggs in one basket with the Europa League as we all know anything can happen over a 90 min final or a tough 2 leg tie.
He knows if he wins games in hand then they're level points with us and right on City's coat tails so he also has to play his best 11 in the league and well for the moment until they lose one or two and then gives up on it. I think if they lost against Chelsea last week he would have thrown in the towel with the league.

Got a feeling the whole season going to blow up in their faces very soon. Away games against Arsenal and Spurs after the semi finals if injuries keep happening he be asking ticket tout to play in midfield for him  .

Going to enjoy the next few weeks and his melt down over the fixture list when it all goes wrong.

If United win their game in hand on City (which is effectively the game against Burnley as City aren't playing this weekend) then they're only 1 point behind City. Then they both play their game in hand on us against each other - battling it out to see who will keep up with us.

This week is crucial for United. Failure to pick up at least 4 points and they'll have good reason to throw in the towel, but even if they do pick up 4-6 points they've still got Spurs and Arsenal looming in weeks 36 and 37.

We'll know a lot more about their ambitions after they've played City for sure.

[Lycan]

Never underestimate Mourinho, BR did and payed the ultimate price.

Come again? A Gerrard slip showed Brendan Rodgers underestimated Mourinho. Is that what you're saying? If so, I'm sorry, but that's a load of bollocks.

[Buck Pete]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/39661668

It could be that you are a child support dodging clueless tool Dwight.

Nothing to do with the colour of your skin Dwight, you attention seeking twat

Your just shite

[GreatEx]

I want to be a premier league manager too, go on gimme an interview. What, you discriminating against me cos I'm dangerously incompetent? Outrage!

[Mister Flip Flop]

Seriously just how shit has Pogba been this season? I genuinely think if he has an academy player he wouldn't be seeing game time. Ponderous, slow, awful at picking out a pass and scores fuck all goals. Can see him shipped off to PSG this summer to be honest.

[Lycan]

Dwight - Why would anyone trust you to manage their team when you abandoned your son because he has severe disabilities?

Honestly, what a cock.

[Lycan]

Seriously just how shit has Pogba been this season? I genuinely think if he has an academy player he wouldn't be seeing game time. Ponderous, slow, awful at picking out a pass and scores fuck all goals. Can see him shipped off to PSG this summer to be honest.

 I think he'll last another season. But if he doesn't improve dramatically, he'll soon be binned off.

[RedForeverTT]

Just watched another famous European victory against the mighty Anderlecht - what a win for Midtable United !!

And what the fuck is that banner - "European Capital of Trophies" ??!!

Europe must have a really small postcode.

[markedasred]

And what the fuck is that banner - "second most european Trophies in greater lancashire" ??!!

They've won fuck all in Europe, especially considering the amount of money they've spent on players.

fixed that for you.

[cptrios]

Oh wait am I stupid? Does the CL qualification for the EL winner NOT take the 4th place slot? Has this already been answered a billion times?

[Big Red Richie]

So the mid table English team, get to face the mid table Spanish team.


Man u V Celta Vigo.




Can't wait. 

[Caston]

Oh wait am I stupid? Does the CL qualification for the EL winner NOT take the 4th place slot? Has this already been answered a billion times?

Yes you're stupid, yes it's been answered a billion times 

[rob1966]

Oh wait am I stupid? Does the CL qualification for the EL winner NOT take the 4th place slot? Has this already been answered a billion times?

Billion and 1 now - England gets 5 places, Top 4 and Europa winners

Europe must have a really small postcode.

Just to remind them of the European Cup alone :-

1)   Real Madrid – 11
2)   AC Milan - 7
3)   Liverpool – 5
4)   Bayern – 5
5)   Barcelona – 5
6)   Ajax – 4
7)   Inter – 3
8.)   Man Utd – 3
9)   Juventus – 2
10)   Benfica - 2