"So, another Friday is upon us. What will you be doing Smithers, something gay no doubt!"
"Wh-WHAT?"
This episode was on C4 last weekend and there are so many good bits.
Wiggum: Well, your story is very compelling, Mr. Jackass... I mean, Simpson. So, I'll just type it up on my invisible typewriter.
Homer: You don't have to humiliate me.
Arsonist: I just torched a building downtown, and I'm afraid I'll do it again!
Wiggum: Yeah, right. I'll just type it up on my invisible typewriter.
Scully: This is a simple lie detector. I'll ask you a few yes-or-no questions, and you just answer truthfully. Do you understand?
Homer: Yes. [lie detector explodes]
Homer Screaming at the sign saying "Die" then a gust of wind shows it actually says "Diet" and he screams again even louder
I could go on but it's one of the best Simpsons episodes ever.