Topic: Sabu Pundit

[Corkboy]

my scouse corner shop pyramid conspiracy man’s plaything club Phoolan Devi FC got fearful salt an’ batter savagin’. Bic bad wolf Libpool FC  is show “no merci” just like Cobra Kai Dough Joe demand from blonde karate snob kids. Yes, despise bein’ soul child friendly London sax club an’ hens call John Craven Cottagers, Canny Sahib order them be put “OUT OF COMMISSION!” an’ Libpool crack ninja squadre obey “SIR YES SIR!” an’ bust an’ raid the Phoolan’s backdoor like got plausible major tipped off from sum snout “you slags” WRIT SABU PUNDIT.

Chief dirty cop an’ head kicker was toothy an’ increase beer-loved Shetland equine bitesman Mr Lewis Avarice an’ he had ‘em defence on grill Hovis awe night specially 9ft No Ouija santa back and grandson off Hollywood Mate Marion, the Bree De Havilland. Avarice such appetite him settle quicker than fly on doo doo ain’t it an’ this muss Shirley ogre well for the Caesar to come he is a jolly good. Like many inch deficient plays off Iniesta year, he difficult knock-off ball  an’ have the ink triggered clothes control that lead get heathen more freed kick than ex Red and most favoured germ Hair Deirdre Hormone. He is grate fan off Gremlins on account borne in You-Mogwai an’ is already the indispensable gizmo in Libpool engine room with chillin’ proviso  “Donut feed it après mitt night.” Avarice workrate is envy off Stakhanov an’ capacity mine for all manner metal ore is yet a nutter facet to his being that owner Mr Jaw Hendry muster toke Inter consideration at point of sale. 

This was truly remarkable gem for Rhetts an’ it was Swarfega because everythin’ was coming off an’ very damn quickly isn’t it? Shrunken horse head Mr MadXerox-Regis is doin’ a Lawd Jesus by returnin’ from stiffs an’ roll back the jeers an’ the stone an’ all wiv’ this sickened trilby- trick in three mad chicks, “he is spoilin’ us” like the Embarrassor’s reception an’ the Ferrari Rochelle. An’ Mr Dog Cow is nut so march inner reach vain off form as knockin’ off the mother’s load isn’t it? Like a Kink Miners in the ancient Geek Myth, Evra think he touches up is turning to goal.

Libpool is havin’ a ray off terrifyin’ midget this day an’ rest of leak struggle cope their shore tars antics e.g fun size local yokel Mr Chase Perrin who is give up lucrative contract as Stewie Griffin in “Flamini Guy” to star in Canny team. He is deadliest baby sins Chuckey isn’t (not Morally MuraLutheran)? Recent discovery off boy wonder hideous Master Fannygun off the permanently open gobs is in gender colossal fear an’ this chinless child horror is poster boy for all banjo devotee already although faece stiff competition from Nosferatu Aloo Peas head Mr Gonzo Selfish: YOU BEEN BAD MA.

The scouse must not Forget (not Guy) that this was  Very Special Episode for Jammy CarrotGrower who chalky up the 666 mill stone around this permanently crimson buzzard neck. Sabu shod like congratulate esteem hoof and remind our lovable ex Sir Semi Hooper retard and Finnish this week at nearly 38 yeahs ode so the Mr Eon Caravan olde thyme wrecker is firmly within the grass like ancient crystallized doggy sheet in kid’s play grunt, near slide.   

Thanking you very much

Sabu Pundit, Ass Choir

[NineTails20]

'Jammy CarrotGrower'!!!

[Adeemo]

Where to start with that one? Another classic from the mighty Sabu Pundit.

[JimmyGrunt]

He cracks me up, but 80% of the time i aint got a clue what the fuck he's going on about.

Or is that the point?

[Billy The Kid]

He cracks me up, but 80% of the time i aint got a clue what the fuck he's going on about.

Or is that the point?

You have to read his posts out loud to yourself, then you'll get it

[Bucke]

Bloody love these

WRIT SABU PUNDIT

[Anywhichwayicant]

About Senderos

What kind toblerone scoffer ever get out pace by our the Sami?!

ROFL! Literally 

[Chavvie]

I didn't think Roma Relish could be beat but blow me if he hasn't done it with MadXerox-Regis

Pissed myself most at "Bic bad wolf Libpool FC  is show “no merci” just like Cobra Kai Dough Joe demand from blonde karate snob kids"

[redsox0411]

Chase Perrin isn't bad either. "He is deadliest baby sins Chuckey isn’t". And he ain'twrong in his description either.

I think I even have found a bit of a clue as to who Sabu really is;
"(not Morally MuraLutheran)"
Seen in light from this passage from the Who Am I thread...

yes, he is notorious for 'not' doing something. in fact i think they even changed the laws for him. I might just be bitter about it though!!!

How many of us go around thinking about Murali as Chucky? Let alone knowing who he is...
 

[Raul!]

Definitely a touch of Indian in the man.  The Phoolan Devi reference, his own name, various other things he has said.

[Corkboy]

Definitely a touch of Indian in the man.  The Phoolan Devi reference, his own name, various other things he has said.

Like that time when he said he was Indian?

[El Capitán Reina]

Libpool is havin’ a ray off terrifyin’ midget this day an’ rest of leak struggle cope their shore tars antics e.g fun size local yokel Mr Chase Perrin who is give up lucrative contract as Stewie Griffin in “Flamini Guy” to star in Canny team.

 

[NineTails20]

Am now patiently waiting for Sabu's reaction to Kenny getting a three year contract.

[scatman]

Dog cow gets me everytime haha and 9ft no ouija santa back

[Zeb]

Some days you need a bit of a lift and a smile, and it's always a pleasure to find a new Sabu post.

Cheers to whoever is writing them.

[Corkboy]

my scouse this hysteric victories what shod be cellar braided, like subterranean Desmond's, 'cos bean a dick ate off waitin' after the Mr Booby Camera snap shot up Semen BUTT instead some pricks is folk arse why she ain't 0-6 vs Arseholes FC when she was weeker than Oliver!'s cruel gruel "so police Canny, we want sum whore." Kaur lummy! Them cants wanna strangulate by Boston's finest an' then there be Morgana Phelan off satisfaction in vengeful yet benevolent heart of SABU PUNDIT rites SABU PUNDIT.

Mata (not Juan, no, nut for us, my deers) plaid into the Libpole graspin' hand when this boy-tank had a red cart inserted up his PingPong wiv' foul more tasteless, more offensive than even pinta Green Kink IPA on our Mr Luger Sliver. This a pivot hole mormon in style Osmond's, a turnin' point, am think the scouse will agree.

Heir plait impotent part in this fixer. Witless it, the beer liga, lickpenny Cut-Price Waterhouse accountant manger Arson Wanga an' his barnet. Once so luxuriant, oh so viscous, yet shockin' red-juiced to Aloo-Pea-Sheer granny by miserable shower (both Wether an' the ex-sporters). This former Samson wish he still had a Sansom, innit, instead o'pack o'puppies he busy groomin' an' later flog at mark-up preposterous. His era of totalitarian football is comin' to a glistenin' end like GadaffiDuck's. An' Mr Roma Relish, who inexplicable glue sparse pelted AIDS ravaged stoat on bonce, like sickly Travis Biggles. His alms greener than ink critter boo Hulk, he SMASH from lethal bench. In dated gag, his combine with electrifiyin' Mr Loose Wires was slicker than Florida coast.

Libpole she in courage wiv' vast majority poor session at 51%. I'm sayin' to you, Mr Surly Atom is bloated waddlin' gat toothed slug to sum but he remorseless conductor in Mittal off park an' an instrumental in maintain the ball. Plus he show unexpect yet touchin' sentimentalism by Mr Alan-Zorro spoof shots to embarrass them's Steve Backley goatkeeper call Watch-it Chesney. An' furthermore, water 'bout the Mr Hearsay Eureka who school infant terrible Master Walnut? Eureka be olive oil lappin' an' muscular Spinich: a scouse Popeye. Thank you very much.

[MichaelA]

epic

[trigger]

this boy-tank had a red cart inserted up his PingPong

[Jack the Red]

"An' Mr Roma Relish, who inexplicable glue sparse pelted AIDS ravaged stoat on bonce, like sickly Travis Biggles. His alms greener than ink critter boo Hulk, he SMASH from lethal bench. In dated gag, his combine with electrifiyin' Mr Loose Wires was slicker than Florida coast"

Jesus H. Christ, I'm in fucking stitches here.

[Ultimate Bromance]

Hahaha

[J-Mc-]

He's back!?

GET HIM TO DO THE MATCH DAY COMMENTARY THIS INSTANT MODERATI!! It'd be a crime against humanity not to

[ChaChaMooMoo]

For a name that reads *pundit*, i was expecting something better.

[...]

I don't get it. I know people have said to read it out to yourself, but that doesn't work.

[And Could He Play]

For a name that reads *pundit*, i was expecting something better.

Really?, he makes more sense than most of them out there.

[Haemoglobin]

I suspect the people who don't 'get' him are mainly those that just give up partway through the post, rather than perform the bit of mental Rubik's Cube shuffling that's required to catch his drift. It's good exercise!!
That I know exactly who 'Master Walnut' and 'Alan-Zorro' are, purely from the context, is a testament to the subtle, skillful, intricate assembly of those brief paragraphs.

I bet you any money that Chris Morris, particularly his Blue Jam-era intros and monologues, was a significant influence on this smart fellow's writing style. And, of course, Stanley Unwin, Lewis Carroll et al. He clearly has more exotic influences, but this is an art form quite peculiar to English.


Sabu Pundit is a national treasure, and perhaps the single greatest achievement of the British Raj. Deep joy.

[Ycuzz]

Just caught this.

Splendid!

[Les Willis]

He is clever, but I don't find it hilarious like some people do.

[aggerdid]

if you read it backwards it has subliminal messages something about paul mccartney and a car crash

[Adeemo]

This former Samson wish he still had a Sansom, innit, instead o'pack o'puppies he busy groomin' an' later flog at mark-up preposterous. His era of totalitarian football is comin' to a glistenin' end like GadaffiDuck's.

Classic.

[Stevie93]

An' Mr Roma Relish, who inexplicable glue sparse pelted AIDS ravaged stoat on bonce,

This bit had me pissing myself.

[Alan_X]

For a name that reads *pundit*, i was expecting something better.

?

[ChaChaMooMoo]

Really?, he makes more sense than most of them out there.

Too bad only he can understand them.

?

Pundit, in Hindi/Sanskrit, translates to this.
*one of great learning, expert; critic, authority; educated Brahman (in India)*

[Corkboy]

Pundit, in Hindi/Sanskrit, translates to this.
*one of great learning, expert; critic, authority; educated Brahman (in India)*

Fits perfectly, then.

[MichaelA]

For a name that reads *pundit*, i was expecting something better.

You appear to be able to speak at least two languages, but it seems that "humour" isn't one of them..

[ghost1359]

'Rub some vicks on it'

 

[ChaChaMooMoo]

You appear to be able to speak at least two languages, but it seems that "humour" isn't one of them..

Yes. Blame it on the work load.

I understand humoooooooooooor better than humour.

[royhendo]

Magic.

[Effes]

Could he just be using a cheap Indian Google translate?

[Brian Blessed]

Could he just be using a cheap Indian Google translate?

I'd like to know what he put in to get the infamous "gold hoarding toblerone scoffer"

[Flinstone]

"An' Mr Roma Relish, who inexplicable glue sparse pelted AIDS ravaged stoat on bonce, like sickly Travis Biggles. His alms greener than ink critter boo Hulk, he SMASH from lethal bench. In dated gag, his combine with electrifiyin' Mr Loose Wires was slicker than Florida coast"

Jesus H. Christ, I'm in fucking stitches here.

translation?