The thing that's important here is that you're part of the demographic of men who will listen to women when they explain this to them. You're not the target here. The target is the equal or even bigger proportion of men than you who won't listen to what a woman says and just dismiss their opinions, that's where men need to take the lead because these people will only listen to a mans opinion which is part of the problem.
A whole culture change needs to happen around how men see women. Like Sian said when she sees a man she finds attractive she doesn't think about abducting or raping them but there are men who do and act on it. That needs to change.
This is it for me. The idea of what it is to be a man has been all wrong to me. I'll be honest, I grew up absolutely hating men due to various reasons, and I hated the model of masculinity pushed upon me by society. The thing is, thinking, feeling, caring and empathic men have long been frowned upon, and often by both sexes too. I have always identified far more with my supposed feminine side, probably because all the wise, knowledgeable, mature and sorted people I knew were female, and how they were resonated with me far more than the pathetically immature macho culture that is drummed into boys by society.
Sadly, prevailing culture paints men into a corner. Men in touch with deeper things get scorned by a culture that pushes a very emotionally immature model of male behaviour. Very few men I've ever known are genuinely emotionally mature. Many are very primitive when it comes to emotion, feelings, empathy etc. Many have never learnt these things, and many go to their graves with the emotional maturity levels of children. The idea of what it takes to be a man has long been toxic, and that shows. So many males are emotionally stunted, and this manifests in relationships, in attitudes, in pretty much every aspect of life actually.
It's extremely complex, but our own culture has sold men down the river. It's left so many confused, resentful, emotionally unable to cope and struggling for the understanding of others that nurtures empathy. This then plays out in how many men view women. When you are emotionally stunted, it's very easy to be intimidated by women. Ah, but men are constantly told they should be in control though. Men who feel inadequate can then go on to use their physicality in order to attempt to claw back the sense of control they feel they should have. This often ends very badly indeed. I'm yet to come across an abuser of women who wasn't also emotionally weak, fragile and who didn't feel inadequate. Their abuse is usually an attempt to gain a sense of control once more.
Society pushes a rather negative extreme as to what it is to be a man. It does it through TV, media etc and it's relentless. Males who don't fit this model get scorned. I was scorned for decades for trying to be thinking, sensitive and feeling rather than a gobshite. I suppose that's why virtually all of my friends are female even now. At least with these women I can be me and liked and loved for being so. I don't have to pretend to be a brainless macho moron around them. I suppose this is also a reason why I trained in counselling/therapy. People in it are emotionally mature, so I can swerve the mind-numbing macho culture in so many other kinds of work settings.
The bottom line for me is we have to be very careful as to what we teach our young people in society, because if we teach them dysfunction then it will manifest itself in numerous settings later on in life. Problem is, even today, if people are thoughtful and highlight these things, they are instantly shut down with accusations of ''snowflake!''
We aren't born like this. We learn these attitudes and approaches. We learn prejudice. We learn our feelings of inadequacy. Particularly when young, we are like sponges. If our prevailing culture peddles dysfunction, then how can we be surprised when we see the things we do? To be honest, I don't see much in the way of positive role models for males. That's sad for males, but also tragic for humanity too, because the emotional immaturity can manifest itself in so many negative ways.
