The phrase "gone tits up" refers to the Egyptian practise of tying bluetits to helium balloons and releasing them. The birds invariably die past 20,000 ft, hence the association with misadventure.
The Edwin Starr song "War (what is it good for?)" was initially called "Water (what is it good for?)". After a record executive came up with an extensive list of uses for water Edwin changed the "ter" in the chorus to a "huuh".
Actress Keira Knightley has managed to slim down to the point where she is two-dimensional. This saves glossy magazines a fortune in photoshoots, as she can now simply be scanned at high resolution.
Any Frenchman wishing to start a family with a Polish woman risks the debilitating genetic condition known as French Polishing, which gives the unfortunate offspring's skin the appearance of teak. The disease was thought to have been eradicated until David Dickinson, Dale Winton and Des 'O' Connor tested positive at the 1940 olympics.