Yep - agree with all of that, but make no mistake i've done enough self pitying along the way, it's difficult to find contentment, i'm nowhere near there. I won't be either until i wake up and i'm happy with how i'm living my life, making good choices regularly and closer to rebuilding some of the bridges i've burned and stop looking over my shoulder at things i've lost and instead be looking forward to the future with new seedlings in Alex's garden are starting to blossom again, particularly in terms of finding somebody to share a future with, settle down and begin a family, which is what i kick myself hardest about, because i had that opportunity once and i let it crash and burn. I think acquiring that would be where i find my ultimate contentment as i would have come full circle and the lessons i've learned will allow me to make better choices on the second occassion.
However in the meantime, it's keep off the booze, keep talking to people - don't become introvert, keep planning for the future and remain positive. Life can be whatever you want to make it, and generally that's down to your own attitude, so i now must keep mine in a good place.
Still got some shakes from my abstinence of booze, but even so much as 3 days later my head is clearer and stronger when talking about these sorts of things. My challenge is to keep dry and keep moving forward, day after day.
