Don't remind me about red wine spills, brings back horrible memories. My wifes Auntie and Uncle have an apartment over in Spain, and we go there every year. There house nearby is in South Wales (Prestatyn) so we go there once a year to collect the keys from them. Each time, bar this year, has been a complete disaster:
2002: broke an antique stool when I was resting on it, fucking bits of wood everywhere.
2003: when trying to unfold their pullout table the entire things collapsed and a glass vase went all over the ground.
2004: the most recent disaster, I spilled a bottle of red wine on their beautiful carpet.
Thankfully nothing happened this year, but I don't think they like us going round.