Author Topic: The feeling of becoming a dad for the first time (Read 5668 times)

Jezzman · « **Reply #120 on:** July 7, 2012, 04:13:08 PM »

Great stuff lads..... congratulation!!!

rob1966 · « **Reply #121 on:** July 7, 2012, 08:35:35 PM »

Quote from: macca888 on July 7, 2012, 03:38:33 PM

Congratulations lads. Good luck to your wives and new babies. Never mind what all those people with their "helpful" tips and advice say to you, just do whatever you think is best for you. If we'd took everyone's advice all the time, the kids would have grown up schizophrenic. One person would say "do this" while someone else would say "definitely don't do that" and someone else would weigh in with "but try this instead." Families, friends and books all think they give the best advice, but at the end of the day it's just you and your Mrs at home to look after them. As long as you feed them, water them, clean them, change their nappy on time and shower them with love, attention and affection, you can't go too far wrong. Best job in the world bar none.

Only piece of advice I've ever listened to was don't let the kids sleep in your bed. Everyone I know whos done that has nothing but grief.

Sat1 · « **Reply #122 on:** July 7, 2012, 08:45:21 PM »

Just after my first one was born I let loose with tears. Never cried that much.

corkboy · « **Reply #123 on:** July 7, 2012, 09:06:06 PM »

The first time I saw my kid, all bloodied and whatnot, they took him over to a little stand to do his apgars and he started crying so I told him it would be alright. My first words to my child were, it'll be alright. Has been too, so far.

Jezzman · « **Reply #124 on:** July 8, 2012, 07:13:35 PM »

Anymore small Liverpool lads or lasses come out to see the world today?

Week 13 beginning today for my fiancé and I ....

rob1966 · « **Reply #125 on:** July 8, 2012, 07:53:13 PM »

Quote from: Jezzman on July 8, 2012, 07:13:35 PM

Anymore small Liverpool lads or lasses come out to see the world today? Week 13 beginning today for my fiancé and I ....

Before you know it, you'll have you own little red in your arms.

My 4 yr old is driving us nuts at the minute, will not stay bed, missus has just gone up to him for the 4th time, I had this for an hour last night.

Prof · « **Reply #126 on:** July 8, 2012, 08:18:57 PM »

Quote from: Jezzman on July 8, 2012, 07:13:35 PM

Anymore small Liverpool lads or lasses come out to see the world today? Week 13 beginning today for my fiancé and I ....

Congrats Jezzman. I came into the Boozer to make a new thread as I'm about to have identical twin boys. Got a daughter who'll be three in September. Nothing compares to fatherhood.

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #127 on:** July 8, 2012, 08:48:36 PM »

Quote from: rob1966 on July 8, 2012, 07:53:13 PM

Before you know it, you'll have you own little red in your arms.

My 4 yr old is driving us nuts at the minute, will not stay bed, missus has just gone up to him for the 4th time, I had this for an hour last night.

I know the feeling - I've spent more time in my 3 year old's bed this week than my own!

DISCLAIMER - he's not been in it with me obviously!

One thing I will say, having your first child is amazing and you will find bits of it a struggle or shock to the system too and that's perfectly understandable. Then one day, you'll have a second and realise that actually, having one was a piece of piss! It's just the 'unknown' factor that makes it so daunting in the early months.

As a second child myself, I now know why they are so often more chilled than the first. They don't have much choice but to just go along with things while the first child has had 2-3 years of undivided attention.

TheKid. · « **Reply #128 on:** July 8, 2012, 09:39:36 PM »

What's being put in the RAWK waters? Babies popping out everywhere.
My little Joseph is 36 hours old now and I can't actually remember what life was like without him!
Can't wait til he can come home from the hospital, tomorrow hopefully

Crimson_Tank · « **Reply #129 on:** July 8, 2012, 09:46:21 PM »

Congrats TheKid.

Quote from: rob1966 on July 8, 2012, 07:53:13 PM

Before you know it, you'll have you own little red in your arms.

My 4 yr old is driving us nuts at the minute, will not stay bed, missus has just gone up to him for the 4th time, I had this for an hour last night.

Tell me about it. My 3 year old boy has the same thing going on I go home from work last night near 9:30 pm he was still up after an hour in bed, he kept getting up and walking down the hall. It took me 30 min to get him to stay in his bed without tears. And guess who was up before 6:00 am?

He has refrained from a nap today so it is early bedtime tonight.

Upinsmoke · « **Reply #130 on:** July 8, 2012, 09:53:47 PM »

My partner had our baby girl at 12.40 am, at 3.30 am the midwife said we could go....I almost died, is this a new policy at the womens now, kick em out after a few hours.
Anyway, baby and mum doing well, except she says her pelvic floor muscles are fucked....

We had a boy 18 months ago but I never remember him being so small and helpless, sure he was like.

TheKid. · « **Reply #131 on:** July 8, 2012, 09:57:52 PM »

Ha mate we must have been in the women's at the exact same time. My missus is still in though as she had to have a c section in the end

Crimson_Tank · « **Reply #132 on:** July 8, 2012, 10:04:15 PM »

Quote from: TheKid. on July 8, 2012, 09:57:52 PM

Ha mate we must have been in the women's at the exact same time. My missus is still in though as she had to have a c section in the end

As did mine, opening the old sunroof is becoming more commonplace....

Upinsmoke · « **Reply #133 on:** July 8, 2012, 10:06:54 PM »

Quote from: TheKid. on July 8, 2012, 09:57:52 PM

Ha mate we must have been in the women's at the exact same time. My missus is still in though as she had to have a c section in the end

We were assigned a midwife on the delivery suite, at 9pm my partner asked for pain relief but the midwife was delivering another baby, we never seen her again, Turns out that by the time we had our girl,.the midwife still hadn't delivered the other baby (4-5 hours later) wasn't yours by any chance was it mate?

jaybeezay · « **Reply #134 on:** July 8, 2012, 10:09:17 PM »

My first is due in September. It's all weird because it is all boys in my family but we are having a girl, never imagined having a daughter and my mates think it is hilarious. Takes some getting used to. It's not so much the lack of sleep that will stress me out, it's the having another little person taking over your house.

My mate had a kid about 5 years ago, before he came along the house was spotless and could have been used as a model home. Now it is just destroyed.

I bet it will be the best thing ever, even though I am 30 I still feel like I am too young to be trusted with an actual human life. Luckily the girlfriend is boss with kids.

TheKid. · « **Reply #135 on:** July 8, 2012, 10:19:58 PM »

Quote from: Upinsmoke on July 8, 2012, 10:06:54 PM

We were assigned a midwife on the delivery suite, at 9pm my partner asked for pain relief but the midwife was delivering another baby, we never seen her again, Turns out that by the time we had our girl,.the midwife still hadn't delivered the other baby (4-5 hours later) wasn't yours by any chance was it mate?

Nah wont have been. It was decided to do the section at 8am yesterday, non emergency one but my missus just wasn't progressing so they asked us to have one.

Filler. · « **Reply #136 on:** July 8, 2012, 10:59:39 PM »

Congrats to the pair of you... a very special time indeed.

My missus went in to labour a few days early and caught us off guard a bit - only by a few days tho -... (she was working on the friday before it happened!), and I was assembling our IKEA cot at midnight while the little might, aged 5 hours, lay on the bed. That first night... the first week really... you just can't take your eyes off him/her.

What I didn't like for the first year... and then the second, and is still ongoing (and will do forever) is the flashes that go thru your mind of them falling down stairs, cracking their skulls open, getting hot water poured over them, a dozen times a day, every day. Some of them would make you physically shout something out. In the early days I had a recurring flash in my head that I'd drop him over the bannister. It just goes on and on and on.

If you're a dad... this was a good read from a few weeks back.. Charlie Brooker on having a kid ...

Quote

You're buffeted by a range of feelings so intense, your face doesn't know how to deal with them, and keeps leaking fluid from somewhere round the eyeholes. Obviously, I can only speak for the men here. Women find childbirth far easier. Many hardly even notice it's happening, which is why they tend to break into absent-minded howls of agony instead of concentrating on the task at hand.

full: http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/apr/01/can-say-i-get-babies

And Could He Play · « **Reply #137 on:** July 9, 2012, 03:00:47 PM »

Quote from: TheKid. on July 8, 2012, 09:39:36 PM

What's being put in the RAWK waters? Babies popping out everywhere.
My little Joseph is 36 hours old now and I can't actually remember what life was like without him!
Can't wait til he can come home from the hospital, tomorrow hopefully

congrats mate.

And Could He Play · « **Reply #138 on:** July 9, 2012, 03:01:58 PM »

my birds labour was easy, couple of hours it lasted, had one of those epidural? needles, no screaming, no drama, nothing, just like "should i push now".

TheKid. · « **Reply #139 on:** July 9, 2012, 03:39:56 PM »

Yeah my missus had the epidural too, take away the pain but slowed down the labour eventually leading to the section.
It was like one of those football matches where they could play for hours and no one scores so has to go to a penalty shoot out.
Back in hospital now with the missus and baby. So surreal just sitting there watch him pulling funny faces between naps

Immoral King Brian Blessed · « **Reply #140 on:** July 9, 2012, 03:57:17 PM »

Quote from: Filler. on July 8, 2012, 10:59:39 PM

What I didn't like for the first year... and then the second, and is still ongoing (and will do forever) is the flashes that go thru your mind of them falling down stairs, cracking their skulls open, getting hot water poured over them, a dozen times a day, every day. Some of them would make you physically shout something out. In the early days I had a recurring flash in my head that I'd drop him over the bannister. It just goes on and on and on.

Isn't that the truth. My one year old will put everything she possibly can in her mouth, it's a nightmare. Last week, we were home alone, she started choking while crawling around, scared the shit out of me, the colour she started turning. I had to pick her up and do the heimlich. It's not quite like in films, where whatever's stuck pops out and the person carries on. I've never been vomited on so much in my life. Up came dinner, milk, it was disgusting. (I think I did it right, it worked either way) Among the puke was this dog shaped medallion, about 3/4"x3'4". She had been in this one small space for a while, and it wasn't from there, so god knows how long she'd been holding it in her mouth. Plus, neither I or the mrs had seen it before, obviously the way she is we have a no small objects whatsoever policy. Oh well, when she is older I look forward to reminding her she owes me life twice now.

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #141 on:** July 9, 2012, 04:06:33 PM »

Quote from: Filler. on July 8, 2012, 10:59:39 PM

What I didn't like for the first year... and then the second, and is still ongoing (and will do forever) is the flashes that go thru your mind of them falling down stairs, cracking their skulls open, getting hot water poured over them, a dozen times a day, every day.

It’s been less of an issue with my second, but before my first was born I hadn’t really held many babies, certainly never for more than a couple of minutes at a time. I was fairly useless to be honest until he was strong enough to support his head, up until then I was so paranoid about hurting him whenever I had to lift him, or change his clothes and stuff. By the second one I was a lot more ‘blasé’ about it. You soon realize they’re a lot more robust than you initially think.

Disclaimer – I’ve made them sound like fold up furniture or something! I obviously treat them both with great care!

In terms of being puked on – our first had the worst reflux problem you could imagine. The slightest lump in baby food or even a bottle that he rushed and he was projectile vomiting everywhere like something from The Exorcist. He was known by his wider family as The Regurgitator. He could hit a target from like 5 yards away. Most impressive.

corkboy · « **Reply #142 on:** July 9, 2012, 04:09:41 PM »

Quote from: Crosby Nick on July 9, 2012, 04:06:33 PM

By the second one I was a lot more ‘blasé’ about it. You soon realize they’re a lot more robust than you initially think.

The saying I always heard was, if the first one drops a dummy, you sterilise it, if the second one does it, you run it under the tap and by the time the third one comes along, you give the dummy to the dog to lick clean.

blurred · « **Reply #143 on:** July 9, 2012, 04:11:53 PM »

Quote from: Crosby Nick on July 8, 2012, 08:48:36 PM

As a second child myself, I now know why they are so often more chilled than the first. They don't have much choice but to just go along with things while the first child has had 2-3 years of undivided attention.

Nah, we're just better, innit.

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #144 on:** July 9, 2012, 04:15:10 PM »

Quote from: blurred on July 9, 2012, 04:11:53 PM

Nah, we're just better, innit.

That as well!

Quote from: corkboy on July 9, 2012, 04:09:41 PM

The saying I always heard was, if the first one drops a dummy, you sterilise it, if the second one does it, you run it under the tap and by the time the third one comes along, you give the dummy to the dog to lick clean.

Haha that does sound about right.

Immoral King Brian Blessed · « **Reply #145 on:** July 9, 2012, 04:27:34 PM »

Ha, I was saying to the wife that our eldest never had a cold wipe touch her backside in the house as long as she was in nappies as we have a wipe warmer. The second one wouldn't know a warm wipe if it hit her in the face.

Stevo79 · « **Reply #146 on:** July 9, 2012, 04:53:28 PM »

Quote from: Immortal King Brian Blessed on July 9, 2012, 04:27:34 PM

Ha, I was saying to the wife that our eldest never had a cold wipe touch her backside in the house as long as she was in nappies as we have a wipe warmer. The second one wouldn't know a warm wipe if it hit her in the face.

I quite enjoy the shocked look on their face when using a cold wipe

especially if woken up in the early hours.

Upinsmoke · « **Reply #147 on:** July 9, 2012, 06:51:42 PM »

Its amazing also how my 18 month old has gone from being the baby to all grown up overnight. Since my daughter came home, I just don't look at him like a baby no more. She's so dainty and drinks like 2oz every few hours, struggling to open her eyes and hold her head up, her chest rising ever so slightly, meanwhile (as I type) I've got this big thing draining a bottle and snoring on me before I put him in his cot.

And Could He Play · « **Reply #148 on:** July 9, 2012, 07:18:26 PM »

i think ill be more chilled this time.

Filler. · « **Reply #149 on:** July 9, 2012, 07:55:59 PM »

Your choking story IKBB is the one I dreaded most. Found it quite hard - the fear of it happening - so much so that I wouldn't feed him certain meals. He used to wretch often (tho not the reflux thing thankfully), and I'd go into panic. But I used to imagine myself just dropping, or throwing him over the bannister - that may sound weird - but I just went everywhere in my head about it. I'd triple check the stair gates, and wake up in a panic at 3am that I hadn't locked it. It was bloody never-ending. I knew this sort of thing was going to happen, and that the rational mind would get overtaken, but to the extent that it did?. no.

I'm better now, and I've always been a bit rough and tumble with him... I've been tap tackling/stepping inside him in the park since he could walk - but those visions are still there. When he was 1 and just walking... he'd pick up a screwdriver or pencil or something and in my head he's already fallen on it and it's gone straight thru his eye and deep into his brain, and the whole story would flash past me in a split second - how I'd tell his mother - what I'd be like in 10 years time - how he'd cope with one eye. Over and over and over again.

Immoral King Brian Blessed · « **Reply #150 on:** July 10, 2012, 03:52:47 PM »

Bloody hell, you have issues!

Jezzman · « **Reply #151 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:31:58 PM »

Thanks so much to all who have contributed in this thread so far. I learn so much when I read through it and I've had a few hystercal laughs too. Brilliant to think that all of these beautiful small Liverpool supporters are following in our footsteps too

The new moms/dads on here, you should post a few pics of the small wonders.... sure they are cuter than anything

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #152 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:39:29 PM »

Quote from: Jezzman on July 10, 2012, 04:31:58 PM

Thanks so much to all who have contributed in this thread so far. I learn so much when I read through it and I've had a few hystercal laughs too. Brilliant to think that all of these beautiful small Liverpool supporters are following in our footsteps too

The new moms/dads on here, you should post a few pics of the small wonders.... sure they are cuter than anything

I took a nice one of my daughter and her favourite LFC related tat/rattle the other day. I'll try and upload it when I get home.

Immoral King Brian Blessed · « **Reply #153 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:40:32 PM »

We have an Ob/Gyn appointment later. Really looking forward to a new sono.

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #154 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:41:47 PM »

Quote from: Immortal King Brian Blessed on July 10, 2012, 04:40:32 PM

We have an Ob/Gyn appointment later. Really looking forward to a new son/or daughter.

Immoral King Brian Blessed · « **Reply #155 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:44:05 PM »

Boom!

Jezz, I did have a "show off your kids" topic, but it got binned off.

corkboy · « **Reply #156 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:44:13 PM »

Quote from: Crosby Nick on July 10, 2012, 04:39:29 PM

I took a nice one of my daughter and her favourite LFC related tat/rattle the other day. I'll try and upload it when I get home.

There was a Show Off Your Kids thread but the Mods decided it wasn't a Good Idea.

8 seconds. Damn you, Brian.

LanceLink · « **Reply #157 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:47:32 PM »

Quote from: corkboy on July 10, 2012, 04:44:13 PM

There was a Show Off Your Kids thread but the Mods decided it wasn't a Good Idea.

8 seconds. Damn you, Brian.

He's heard that before.

Immoral King Brian Blessed · « **Reply #158 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:54:24 PM »

Only on my good days.

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #159 on:** July 10, 2012, 04:59:50 PM »

Quote from: corkboy on July 10, 2012, 04:44:13 PM

There was a Show Off Your Kids thread but the Mods decided it wasn't a Good Idea.

I'll reply to you Corky, I'll pretend I didn't see the answer above yours...

Probably a stupid question but why was it deemed not a good idea? Deemed inappropriate?