Author Topic: ITV's Football coverage (Read 5722 times)

rushyman · « **on:** January 9, 2012, 11:38:36 PM »

Its just depressingly bad. The layout is shocking from the kick off. Looks like Saint and Greavsie just left

Then you have the presentation...

Adrian Chiles and his total inability to string a coherent sentence together without repeating a section of it or saying er or erm 5 times, buying his peanut brain time before it relays the next feeble amount of information to his ridiculous fat puffin face

Steve Ryder is OK. Boring, but can talk properly and do his job well. Unlike the afformentioned impostor. Gabby Logan again like Ryder OK. But you want a bit of knowledge from them, just asking questions profusely without a care in the world to the answer like a robot will eventually find you out

Gareth Southgate is wetter than any fish has ever been. If the guy has any sort of opinion its shrouded in bland rhetoric so as not to inconvenience a single person on the planet. He said the other day that some players had to 'step up to the plate' He probably threw up in a bin after

Then we come to his polar opposite. Roy Keane. Purposefully goes out of his way to shoot from the hip and everyones got to 'buck their ideas up' for one reason or the other. The guys got a big mouth, but if I was being fair Id say hes the least worst thing about ITV's hideous coverage

Then you have the commentators. Oh Dear God...

Clive Tyldsleys Man Utd wankathon knows not one bound in the universe. I think 'That night in Barcelona' has become a drinking game in some parts. Along with 'Back to Base Camp' whatever the fuck that means. Youd be forgiven for thinking youd accidentally subscribed to MUTV. If that guy ever, ever goes to Sky theyre going to have to offer sort of no commentary service

BTW whos the one saying 'hello' every 5 minutes like rain man? Christ stop.

Jim Beglin. Mate the word is 'anyway' not 'annie way' fuck me that irritates the shit out of me. Aswell as his constant shit talking. Townshends false passion makes him sound like a bad actor trying to get a part in a shit play, 'dont be suprised to see him do this' 'dont be suprised to see that happen'. Are you ever going to get one of those right? or not talk bollocks for 90 minutes come to think of it

Poor old Jim Rosenthal still looks like he should be counting in a cape on Sesame Street. Wheeled out for draws and when people are ill.

Every pundit they get on seems to be someone whos been on other channels and is too shit for words so theyve binned them. Gordon Strachan for example would starve to death if he became a stand up comedian yet he seems to think this was his calling in life

Its a new low with them now though. Culminating on our part with Matt Smiths ludicrous inflammatory comment at the weekend about Luis and the fan v Oldham.

The loss of sound at the weekend in the first 10 mins of the Sunderland game was the vest coverage ive seen from ITV for a while.
Ironically, that speaks volumes

Matt8Pie · « **Reply #1 on:** January 9, 2012, 11:43:56 PM »

Agreed.

Upinsmoke · « **Reply #2 on:** January 9, 2012, 11:51:03 PM »

Yep, hate it, hate it, hate it.

Barneylfc · « **Reply #3 on:** January 9, 2012, 11:55:31 PM »

That's a quality rant rushyman. Agree with every word

Billy The Kid. · « **Reply #4 on:** January 10, 2012, 12:39:07 AM »

Ha ha ha, top rant sir

You're right though, ITV is fucking shit. Tyldlsley, Chiles and Townsend all grate on me. I don't mind Roy Keane though, for the simple fact that although he's full of his own self importance, he'll at least give you his honest opinion instead of trotting out your arc typical cliched pundit responses. Most of which are just pointless ramblings. See Gareth Southgate as an example.

-Q- · « **Reply #5 on:** January 10, 2012, 12:42:39 AM »

It probably says something that I prefer to watch adverts at half-time and go to the toilet when the 'analysis' comes on.

Elzar · « **Reply #6 on:** January 10, 2012, 12:43:26 AM »

What was the joke Chiles tried to make the other day when he said "errr" about 4 times inbetween every word.

That was comedy, the guys a joke.

DanJay87 · « **Reply #7 on:** January 10, 2012, 12:45:44 AM »

You forgot about the worst thing

In fact, the worst thing in all of Sports Broadcasting

Giving a job to this guy

BAFANA BAFANA!!!!!!

El_Pistolero · « **Reply #8 on:** January 10, 2012, 12:51:19 AM »

Aye. It's shite. Fucking hate ITV.

rowan_d · « **Reply #9 on:** January 10, 2012, 01:10:14 AM »

Quote from: Elzar on January 10, 2012, 12:43:26 AM

What was the joke Chiles tried to make the other day when he said "errr" about 4 times inbetween every word.

That was comedy, the guys a joke.

It wasn't even a joke per se, it was a description of Man City's 'We're Not Here' banner finished with a comment along the lines of 'I bet they wish they weren't.

It was like Gareth Gates reading The Iliad

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1eG_1VTDYA

Dogshite, best advert for the license fee there is

peelyon · « **Reply #10 on:** January 10, 2012, 01:25:56 AM »

Quote from: rushyman on January 9, 2012, 11:38:36 PM

BTW whos the one saying 'hello' every 5 minutes like rain man? Christ stop.

I just spat out my brew

ThepepeReina · « **Reply #11 on:** January 10, 2012, 01:34:05 AM »

Nice rant

-Q- · « **Reply #12 on:** January 10, 2012, 01:34:59 AM »

Quote from: rushyman on January 9, 2012, 11:38:36 PM

BTW whos the one saying 'hello' every 5 minutes like rain man? Christ stop.

Clive Tyldesley, lol

"Hello! Hello! Here we go!" is one of my favourite pieces of commentary ever though.

Djimothy · « **Reply #13 on:** January 10, 2012, 01:40:37 AM »

Agreed,they're fucking awful.ITV coverage of sport in general is terrible,their F1 was a disgrace when compared to the BBC's.

1021 · « **Reply #14 on:** January 10, 2012, 02:44:00 AM »

Quote from: DanJay87 on January 10, 2012, 12:45:44 AM

You forgot about the worst thing

In fact, the worst thing in all of Sports Broadcasting

Giving a job to this guy

BAFANA BAFANA!!!!!!

''Goal! Bafana! Bafana!... Goal South Africa....A goal for all Africa'' (or something along those lines).

Will forever remain the cringiest, most appalling response to a goal all of sports commentary history.
The fact he had thought of it was bad enough, but that he wrote it down, and in the moment went through with it, just appalling.

shelovesyou · « **Reply #15 on:** January 10, 2012, 03:21:40 AM »

The Music is shite as well. Remember the good old days of top quality sports themes on TV ?
Bring this back ITV -

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/1Z3-1QLzJzM?fs=1" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/1Z3-1QLzJzM?fs=1</a>

OR

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/cP_kY__KumE&?fs=1" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/cP_kY__KumE&?fs=1</a>

pewithree3 · « **Reply #16 on:** January 10, 2012, 08:23:10 AM »

Beglin is thick, how an ex pro can be so clueless about what`s
going on in the game is beyond belief.
Just imagine Southgate`s half time talks in the dressing room,
I bet his teams were always the first out for the second half, so boring.

Adeemo · « **Reply #17 on:** January 10, 2012, 08:59:49 AM »

Jim Beglin, just because you insist on telling me to "listen" before making every single remark during a game, does not mean that I will. Maybe, if you stopped talking so much shite, I would indeed "listen" to what you had to say every once in a while.

It's Jimmy Corkhill · « **Reply #18 on:** January 10, 2012, 09:07:19 AM »

Belter of a rant. The Jim Rosenthal part was outstanding!

Pheeny · « **Reply #19 on:** January 10, 2012, 09:19:03 AM »

they might all be shit but everyone of them is better than Motson.

WEST HAM PAUL · « **Reply #20 on:** January 10, 2012, 09:22:52 AM »

Spot on Rushyman, ITV is dreadful.

Tyldsley is an out & out Manc.

Livbes · « **Reply #21 on:** January 10, 2012, 09:39:41 AM »

Great rant.

Outside of football Robbie fat Williams was always the man i despised the most, in my eyes talentless, fat, boss eyed, fat junkie, fat. But christ Adrian chiles is up there now. How that ugly, fat clown can steal a living from fronting tv shows just blows my mind. He is supposedly this big West Brom fan, but really he is a fat whopper who knows sweet fuck all about football, erm, umm,erm, City, erm, umm losing . . . . . ITV are c*nts.

joezydudek · « **Reply #22 on:** January 10, 2012, 09:52:15 AM »

Quote from: Pheeny-Suarez on January 10, 2012, 09:19:03 AM

they might all be shit but everyone of them is better than Motson.

No way, I'm not Motson's biggest fan, but he at least has a bit of knowledge, something that's completely lacking on ITV.
The brilliant OP should be forwarded to ITV!

arthur sarnoff · « **Reply #23 on:** January 10, 2012, 09:58:49 AM »

ITV should bring back Brian Moore. I know he's been dead ten years, but he's still a better commentator than anything they've got now.

LoveFollowConquer · « **Reply #24 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:02:08 AM »

That first eight minutes of Peterborough vs Sunderland was pure bliss.

LiverLuke · « **Reply #25 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:02:27 AM »

good football coverage seems to be a rarity these days, sitting through jon champion and waddle on ESPN is painful too. Sky sports have a decent one too, dont mind tyler, smiths okay if a bit boring, actually used to think gray was a very good commentator. ITV have none unfortunately.

El Ninos Black Eye · « **Reply #26 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:07:53 AM »

It is shit. Oh and Gabby Logan's not on ITV anymore, she did MOTD the other day.

callanlfc5times · « **Reply #27 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:09:45 AM »

You do realise that they show the game? Who gives a shit, if it bothers you that much tune in just before the game starts and then watch it muted in silence or with a different commentary stream over it. At the end of the day they are moving a camera from side to side to follow the football and the play, at the end of the day that's all any channel can do when covering a football game and that's all that matters. So long as I get to watch the game I couldn't give a fuck what presenters they have or whatever especially because it's so easy to avoid them anyway.

1892tillforever · « **Reply #28 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:16:35 AM »

At least the Cup game vs City is on BBC

S · « **Reply #29 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:24:29 AM »

Clive Tyldsley - "<Insert team> are like a boxer on the ropes here"

thelinnen · « **Reply #30 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:37:18 AM »

It is ridiculously biased towards English teams in the Champions League. I hate the theory that because they are English they think everybody watching wants them to win.

Andy @ Allerton · « **Reply #31 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:42:05 AM »

Er they are a Manchester based channel with only one interes - Manchester United.

Been that way since I was a nipper. Be nice if they went out of business, but sadly won't happen.

Farman · « **Reply #32 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:42:45 AM »

Adrian Chiles was perfectly suited to the slightly less formal, quirky nature of Match of the Day 2. I like him, but he's not suited to the polished big match front man role.

I like Steve Ryder. I had a quick chat with him once when we were both getting of a plane on the way to a Euro away game. I told him he look just as smooth in real life as he did on the telly. His reply? "Just wait 'til the drugs wear off". Liked him even more since then!

Farman · « **Reply #33 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:49:34 AM »

My favourite ITV commentary moment was a few years ago when they had Ron Atkinson as a co-commentator on a United Champions League game. Scholes scored a goal that was clearly offside, which was initially denied by Big Ron. Then, on the slow mo replay, when presented with the irrefutable evidence, what did he say? I kid you not, every word is accurate - "Well, yes, Scholes was offside, but they should give him the goal ayway just for his sheer persistence".

WhoHe · « **Reply #34 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:50:16 AM »

Quote from: Pheeny-Suarez on January 10, 2012, 09:19:03 AM

they might all be shit but everyone of them is better than Motson.

Absolutely agree, just because he does his "homework" and bores us to death with his inane bullshit "facts" does'nt mean he is good or interesting. Typical BBC - job for life and incompetance is no reason to be dismissed or removed from our screens, had a nice new sheepy on last time I saw him though. He has become a caricature of what a shit commentator should be like and sees himself as some sort of folk hero - "Motty" fuck off.

Oh and yes ITV sports coverage is shit.

Crosby Nick · « **Reply #35 on:** January 10, 2012, 10:56:43 AM »

Loved these pearls of wisdom:

Quote from: rushyman on January 9, 2012, 11:38:36 PM

Gareth Southgate is wetter than any fish has ever been.

Poor old Jim Rosenthal still looks like he should be counting in a cape on Sesame Street. Wheeled out for draws and when people are ill.

Quote from: rowan_d on January 10, 2012, 01:10:14 AM

It was like Gareth Gates reading The Iliad

Haha! "but...erm...the ref...erm...is uuuh...anything but a....erm...Homer"

redgriffin73 · « **Reply #36 on:** January 10, 2012, 11:07:56 AM »

Quality rant and spot on!

Learpholl · « **Reply #37 on:** January 10, 2012, 11:29:04 AM »

Quote from: rushyman on January 9, 2012, 11:38:36 PM

Its a new low with them now though. Culminating on our part with Matt Smiths ludicrous inflammatory comment at the weekend about Luis and the fan v Oldham.

I saw that and just shouted "Fuck off!" to the tele, it was completely necessary, just shit stirring nonsense.

west_london_red · « **Reply #38 on:** January 10, 2012, 11:29:56 AM »

Ok, im gonna bite... "that balmy night in Barcelona"

Quality OP by the way.

rushyman · « **Reply #39 on:** January 10, 2012, 11:30:49 AM »

Quote from: DanJay87 on January 10, 2012, 12:45:44 AM

You forgot about the worst thing

In fact, the worst thing in all of Sports Broadcasting

Giving a job to this guy

BAFANA BAFANA!!!!!!

Oh god yes. Bafana Bafana, Jesus you bastard

This is the same guy who said 'I love the way he smiles' about Ronaldinho. You and his mother mate. Not to mention his 'he goes by the name of Wayne Rooney' quotes every time they play. Make it a bit more obvious why dont you

Then there was that other totally written piece of balls at the end of the World Cup 'Im going to watch an under 12 game next week and I cant wait' Vomit inducing.