Author Topic: Owen's Brochure impresses Ferguson  (Read 205596 times)

Offline stevensr123

  • bedwetter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 7,794
Owen's Brochure impresses Ferguson
« on: June 14, 2009, 03:57:00 am »
Agents offer Michael Owen to clubs with help of 34-page brochure

Michael Owen's management company has been shopping their client to various clubs with the help of a 34-page brochure that talks up the Newcastle striker.

In the document, Wasserman Media Group says: "Were it not for an unhappy spell at Real Madrid and two injury-scarred years at Newcastle, he would be spoken about in the same breath as Torres and Ronaldo and valued in the priceless figures that only match-winning goalscorers ever justify."

Owen is out of contract on 30 June and available as a free agent. The Wasserman brochure, reported in the Sunday Mirror, reveals the player would prefer to stay in the Premier League. It says that, in choosing his next move, Owen "is about to make the biggest decision of his football career", and explains that the 29-year-old is "good looking" and "charismatic".

Sam Rush, the group's chief operating officer, said: "As one of the world's leading sports agencies, Wasserman regularly utilise comprehensive documentation and audiovisual material to illustrate the benefits of our clients."


http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2009/jun/14/michael-owen-newcastle-united-sales-brochure
PUSSY cat, PUSSY cat, I love you,  yes I do.......

Offline Brian Blessed

  • Gordon's ALIVE? Practically Bear Grylls. Backwards Bluesman Bastard.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 44,183
  • Super Title: Feedback Tourist #4
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #1 on: June 14, 2009, 04:33:24 am »
I look forward to the next 20 pages.
Anyone else being strangely drawn to Dion Dublin's nipples?

Offline Callaghan.

  • Enjoys a roasted nut (preferably the 'TonyTheRedNosedReindeer' variety)
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,324
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #2 on: June 14, 2009, 05:12:23 am »
No comment.

Offline FernandoTorrestieri

  • Kopite
  • *****
  • Posts: 811
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #3 on: June 14, 2009, 05:21:11 am »
They shouldn't use 34 pages, maybe about 27 would do. It's a small detail but the psychological effect of 34 leads prospective buyers to think of his unfavorable age.

Offline Finn Solomon

  • Life sentence
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 16,144
  • I love Coutinho's balls
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #4 on: June 14, 2009, 06:33:57 am »
In the document, Wasserman Media Group says: "Were it not for an unhappy spell at Real Madrid and two injury-scarred years at Newcastle, he would be spoken about in the same breath as Torres and Ronaldo and valued in the priceless figures that only match-winning goalscorers ever justify."

"Were it not for Manchester United and Chelsea, Liverpool would have won the Quintuple multiple times and Rafa Benitez celebrated as the best manager of all time and space."
Twitter - FinnSolomon
Rafa made it so that you didn't give a shit which fucking ball emerged from Platini's jar.

Offline Mother.F

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 1,436
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #5 on: June 14, 2009, 06:44:55 am »
It's a bit pitiful to still be longing to laugh at Michael Owen. For shame Grauniad.

I hope he finds a good club.

Offline Mirra

  • The Cock of RAWK. desperately seeking two fat ladies. His ass found glass in the grass.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 13,543
  • No one on the corner got a swagger like me
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #6 on: June 14, 2009, 08:47:42 am »
Hope he gets stuck with a championship team myself, its the least he deserves. Horrible selfish little twat.
Mirra, 7777 wake up the thread needs you!

Offline Alan_X

  • WUM. 'twatito' - The Cat Herding Firm But Fair Voice Of Reason (Except when he's got a plank up his arse). Gimme some skin, priest! Has a general dislike for Elijah Wood. Clearly cannot fill even a thong! RAWK Resident Muppet. Has a crush o
  • RAWK Staff
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 53,397
  • Come on you fucking red men!!!
  • Super Title: This is super!
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #7 on: June 14, 2009, 08:52:10 am »
"Were it not for an unhappy spell at Real Madrid and two injury-scarred years at Newcastle....

Hmm... and why exactly was poor Michael at Real Madrid?...  and Newcastle?...   
Sid Lowe (@sidlowe)
09/03/2011 08:04
Give a man a mask and he will tell the truth, Give a man a user name and he will act like a total twat.
Its all about winning shiny things.

Offline LFC Lad

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,231
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #8 on: June 14, 2009, 09:57:24 am »
Good luck to Michael in finding a new club, but he put himself in that position.   He was having a great carrear at Anfield til he himself decided to bin it.  He's got no-one else to blame for ending up with a now Championship side.
"The trouble with referees is that they know the rules, but they don't know the game" - Bill Shankly

Offline RJH

  • doesn't know his alphabet
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 8,350
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #9 on: June 14, 2009, 10:03:41 am »
Quote
It says that, in choosing his next move, Owen "is about to make the biggest decision of his football career"

I'd say that moment came back in 2004.

Offline Sorted!!

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,704
  • Bosso Ngenkani.
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #10 on: June 14, 2009, 10:18:02 am »
Boy, have they come down in a loud and painful thump to the ground. I have no sympathy for the boy.
It's just like if your bird leaves you and 2 weeks later, you win the lottery then she wants to come running back.

You have made your bed, lie in it. :wave
« Last Edit: June 14, 2009, 10:20:36 am by Sorted!! »
We'll visit the Folies Bergeres,
They like to see the Scousers there,
The women are lovely with skin like a peach,
But no one can move it like Kenny Dalglish.

Offline Alan_X

  • WUM. 'twatito' - The Cat Herding Firm But Fair Voice Of Reason (Except when he's got a plank up his arse). Gimme some skin, priest! Has a general dislike for Elijah Wood. Clearly cannot fill even a thong! RAWK Resident Muppet. Has a crush o
  • RAWK Staff
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 53,397
  • Come on you fucking red men!!!
  • Super Title: This is super!
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #11 on: June 14, 2009, 10:22:57 am »
Owen is out of contract on 30 June and available as a free agent. 


Now there's a surprise... unlike Michael to run down his contract so his club get fuck all for him when he leaves...
Sid Lowe (@sidlowe)
09/03/2011 08:04
Give a man a mask and he will tell the truth, Give a man a user name and he will act like a total twat.
Its all about winning shiny things.

Online Party Phil

  • Boring Cunt that flies Air Bizarre
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 12,589
  • Big in Japan
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #12 on: June 14, 2009, 10:30:18 am »
Owen "is about to make the biggest decision of his football career", and explains that the 29-year-old is "good looking" and "charismatic".

Do I smell a reality TV show coming? The smash hit show of the summer: "How do you find a new club like Maria Michael?
If you're lying, I'll chop your head off.

Offline Art Vandelay

  • a.k.a. Terry Gilliam
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 15,110
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #13 on: June 14, 2009, 10:41:08 am »
"charismatic"

Fucking hell, that's the funniest thing I've read in ages.  A tin of creosote has more charisma than Michael Owen.
"And on the pedestal these words appear: 'My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!' Nothing beside remains."

Offline Joe Rogans Chin

  • Has an uncanny grasp of Aldo's balls
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 5,876
  • I Don't Know What It Is But I Love It
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #14 on: June 14, 2009, 10:52:20 am »
"charismatic"

Fucking hell, that's the funniest thing I've read in ages.  A tin of creosote has more charisma than Michael Owen.

 ;D

I'd still take him, we need to make him an offer, to reflect his current standing in the game. As he has a lot to prove, a basic £15,000 a week and lots of performance and pay as you play bonus's, to be reviewed if he stays fit and helps us win trophies.

Rafa can at then least say to Gerrard and Carrgaher, we offered him a deal, but again he choose the money on offer and went to Villa or Everton.

Offline GBF

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 19,039
  • The only religion with a God that you can touch!
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #15 on: June 14, 2009, 11:13:53 am »
if he wanted to change his greedy twit character, he would take a pay as you play contract at newcastle and get them out of championship...its not like he needs the money
01111001 01101111 01110101 00100111 01101100 01101100 00100000 01101110 01100101 01110110 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101100 01101011 00100000 01100001 01101100 01101111 01101110 01100101

Offline carling

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 7,520
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #16 on: June 14, 2009, 11:20:03 am »
Karma is a bitch.

Offline capt k

  • aaaaaaaavemaaaaaaaaan!
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 5,733
  • id rather be fishing
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #17 on: June 14, 2009, 11:27:21 am »
This has made me realise something about myself..

I CAN hold a grudge.. ;)

you made your bed Midget..now lie in it.
JFT 96

Offline Billy The Kid

  • Out of the closet with a whiet shirt on, but would pay a fiver not to be gay...Would prefer to give his manliness to someone rather than receive theirs especially Amir in another life.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 19,942
  • I'm Your Huckleberry
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #18 on: June 14, 2009, 11:49:46 am »
In the document, Wasserman Media Group says: "Were it not for an unhappy spell at Real Madrid and two injury-scarred years at Newcastle, he would be spoken about in the same breath as Torres and Ronaldo and valued in the priceless figures that only match-winning goalscorers ever justify."

That made me laugh. What a pile of cock

Fact is, he turned his back on the club that made him who he was. Off to Madrid he went in search of titles, while his old team mates went and recorded arguably the greatest night in the history of the European cup. See Michael, karma is a bitch. I hope the fuckers balls get stuck to a bench from frost bite, while he sits injured, away to fucking Boro, in a championship relegation decider in the middle of february next year.

Be a shame wouldn't it Michael? Stuck in the championship in a world cup year? I doubt Capello would have much interest in watching you then would he? And its all your own fault
When overtaken by defeat, as you may be many times, remember than mans faith in his own ability is tested many times before he is crowned with final victory. Defeats are nothing more than challenges to keep trying.” – Napoleon Hill.

Online west_london_red

  • Knows his stuff - pull the udder one! RAWK's Dairy Queen.
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 21,909
  • watching me? but whose watching you watching me?
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #19 on: June 14, 2009, 11:51:16 am »

Now there's a surprise... unlike Michael to run down his contract so his club get fuck all for him when he leaves...

What do u mean? Real Madrid made about £10 million out of him!

Thinking is overrated.
The mind is a tool, it's not meant to be used that much.
Rest, love, observe. Laugh.

Offline Rusty Oysterburger

  • Might be George Gillett
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 8,200
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #20 on: June 14, 2009, 12:15:48 pm »
I think we should defo sign him up...don't we need a new kitman now?
www.twitter.com/savagefletch

"'Do it?' Dan, I'm not a Republic serial villain. Do you seriously think I'd explain my master-stroke if there remained the slightest chance of you affecting its outcome? I did it thirty-five minutes ago."

Offline MagicHat

  • Seeks SingleBunny For Professional Relationship And Cosy Nights In
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 6,902
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #21 on: June 14, 2009, 12:25:31 pm »
Wow at the bitterness. Then again, see the same thing with Arsenal fans and Hleb/Ade

Does seem a little ridiculous having to do this.  Sad too

Offline JonnyCigarettes®

  • Airfix salesman (rumoured to be training a secret wankfest monkey arsegravy army)
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 7,217
  • Pretty fly for a white guy
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #22 on: June 14, 2009, 12:28:15 pm »

To be fair to Michael, fuck him.
Johnny Sack: 200 grand for insulting my wife. What's next, Carmine, he gets to fuck her for a million?

Carmine: He wants to fuck her?

Johnny Sack: I'm making a point.

Offline Degs

  • sy's midnight runners.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 13,444
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #23 on: June 14, 2009, 12:31:24 pm »
It's a bit pitiful to still be longing to laugh at Michael Owen.

No it's not

:lmao
:lmao
:lmao

Leaving Liverpool to win medals, I hope he never wins another thing in his life.

Offline woz92

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 1,061
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #24 on: June 14, 2009, 12:39:23 pm »
LMAO hes like a stray dog on paul o'grady trying to find a nice home
YNWA 96

Offline Chicken Wow Wows

  • Main Stander
  • ***
  • Posts: 242
  • We all Live in a Red and White Kop
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #25 on: June 14, 2009, 12:40:58 pm »
In his time at our club he was sensational, he is a great in my opinion.

Lets be honest at the time Liverpool didnt look up to much and Real Madrid were forming, what they thought, was one of their best ever sides. I think he thought it would all turn out differently.

The rest is history, and its in our favour, so lets not kick him whilst hes down, he was superb whilst at our club and deserves respect.

Offline matchyg

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 1,522
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #26 on: June 14, 2009, 12:41:27 pm »
My god, I feel sorry for him, I used to be a massive fan, when he started playing for England. I only watched the World Cup and European Championships then.  :'(

I still think he could do well playing deeper, maybe as a midfielder, the way Keegan was using him last season, when they went on their winning streak. Perhaps Milan would be a good option for him.
As above, so below.  As within, so without.
Magna est veritas et prevalebit

Offline GBF

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 19,039
  • The only religion with a God that you can touch!
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #27 on: June 14, 2009, 12:47:11 pm »
even Heskey and Defoe are ahead of him in the england pecking order... :lmao
01111001 01101111 01110101 00100111 01101100 01101100 00100000 01101110 01100101 01110110 01100101 01110010 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101100 01101011 00100000 01100001 01101100 01101111 01101110 01100101

Offline lfctitch

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,775
  • Titch
    • CS5 Design
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #28 on: June 14, 2009, 12:49:44 pm »
I can't believe some would actually pay to have him back. He can come here as long as he pays us. I think £3 million a year is about right

Offline BlackandWhitePaul

  • Principled Newcastle fan- who gave up following his team rather than support Saudi takeover
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 22,506
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #29 on: June 14, 2009, 12:53:32 pm »

Now there's a surprise... unlike Michael to run down his contract so his club get fuck all for him when he leaves...
I'd love the opportunity to give him a swift kick in the bollocks before he fucks off.    :D

Offline evenflow

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 1,267
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #30 on: June 14, 2009, 01:00:25 pm »
Quote from: rowan_d on Today at 05:49:28 PM
And though Jacob once did ascend unto the Holy Mountain, Christ the Healer declared unto him, 'Mad Men has had a mare in this thread.'

Jacob, 3:16

Offline classycarra

  • The Left Disonourable Chuntering Member For Scousepool.
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 30,507
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #31 on: June 14, 2009, 01:10:22 pm »

I still think he could do well playing deeper, maybe as a midfielder, the way Keegan was using him last season, when they went on their winning streak. Perhaps Milan would be a good option for him.

you've outdone yourself!

Online zero zero

  • Karma's a bitch. Innit.
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 15,543
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #32 on: June 14, 2009, 01:18:25 pm »
you've outdone yourself!
:)

It's sad really, I loved him when he played for us. Can't bring myself to be happy at his misfortune

Offline rednich85

  • Gargantuan Wanker. Intimately linked to Keys and Gray.
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 17,631
  • Stay Black. That's the most important thing.
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #33 on: June 14, 2009, 01:18:44 pm »
In his time at our club he was sensational, he is a great in my opinion.

Lets be honest at the time Liverpool didnt look up to much and Real Madrid were forming, what they thought, was one of their best ever sides. I think he thought it would all turn out differently.

The rest is history, and its in our favour, so lets not kick him whilst hes down, he was superb whilst at our club and deserves respect.

Deserves respect?

No he fucking doesnt.

He deserves nothing from the club whom he walked out on for bigger and better things.

He deserves to be the but if every joke until the day he dies.

When someone has a nightmare, we can say "they've had a Mickey Owen"

Fuck the welsh midget, fuck him
"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons."

@rednich85

Offline The Gulleysucker

  • RAWK's very own spinached up Popeye. Transfer Board Veteran 5 Stars.
  • RAWK Remembers
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 11,496
  • An Indolent Sybarite
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #34 on: June 14, 2009, 01:20:13 pm »
I couldn't care less.

Owen had footballing talent in abundance and was a joy to watch but once that initial exiting flush of innocent and precocious youth went after his first serious injury, he then seemed to branch into other areas, and perhaps excelled above all in looking after number 1, and in later years perfecting his ability to wangle staggering sums of money for questionable old rope.

I expect he's a very personable chap to know, but I can't help but sometimes think that despite protestations to the contrary,  any regret he may have over his lack of medals or England appearances is not primarily as a sportsman, but at missed business opportunities to increase his brand Owen sponsorship and advertising revenue, and every statement that I have ever heard from him simply seems carefully crafted and caged to primarily ensure the retention of public sympathy for the St Michael.

So it is unlikely I will ever shed a tear at his lack of medals or the 'wasted' career of a man who can comfortably go to sleep on a mattress stuffed with £100 notes dreaming of his extensive property and racing stables portfolio and wondering were he'll fly his helicopter to next.

Unless he's spectacularly dim behind the facade and has poor financial advice or his gambling habit is as rumoured, unlike the rest of us, his children and possibly grandchildren will need never do an honest days hard work in their privileged lives. Most of us would deem that as pretty wildly successful.

I think he should simply retire gracefully and stop getting people excited at the (im?)possibility of him ever really recapturing that fantastic magic period of his youth before the patience wears too thin and the good memories are irrevocably tainted, and now concentrate purely on enjoying his considerable wealth and his horses and other trappings in secluded anonymity.
I don't do polite so fuck yoursalf with your stupid accusations...

Right you fuckwit I will show you why you are talking out of your fat arse...

Mutton Geoff (Obviously a real nice guy)

Offline LFCfan4Life

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 9,142
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #35 on: June 14, 2009, 01:26:47 pm »
I couldn't care less.

you summed it up perfectly would hate to see him back in a red shirt

wasted his career and showed his true colours when left us in the shit and moved for £8m in 2004. 8 fucking million what a joke if he would have signed a contract the year before he could have fucked off anyway but at least we would have got about £25m
Two bulls, one old and one young, standing at the top of a field watching a herd of cows. The young one says, "hey let's run down and fuck one of them", and the older one says, "patience, let's walk down and fuck them all".

* * * * *
JUSTICE 4 THE 96.

Offline Cusamano

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 14,827
  • Natural Police
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #36 on: June 14, 2009, 01:39:03 pm »
His move from us has to go down as one of the worst transfers a footballer has made.

Incredible how far he has fallen.
Wake up, will ya pal? If you're not inside, you're outside, OK? And I'm not talking a $400,000 a year working Wall Street stiff flying first class and being comfortable, I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars buddy. A player. - Gordon Gekko

Offline MagicHat

  • Seeks SingleBunny For Professional Relationship And Cosy Nights In
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 6,902
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #37 on: June 14, 2009, 02:21:50 pm »
In his time at our club he was sensational, he is a great in my opinion.

Lets be honest at the time Liverpool didnt look up to much and Real Madrid were forming, what they thought, was one of their best ever sides. I think he thought it would all turn out differently.


Liverpool were not doing well, had a new manager who might not adapt to English game, how long after that was it Gerrard nearly left? Real Madrid, a massive club with lots of money and star players come in for Owen, he leaves not a domestic rival but to a club in another country. which so very few England players are willing to do.

If a player from Arsenal or Sunderland (who were doing well at the time if I recall rightly) did that, we would be calling it ambition, wanting to win things and so on. As it is Owen and Liverpool, this seems to be a unspeakable and evil crime, doesn't seem fair

Offline Hazell

  • Ultimate Movie Night Draft Winner 2017. King - or Queen - of Mystery. Hyzenthlay. The 5th Benitle's sex conch.
  • RAWK Scribe
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 76,904
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #38 on: June 14, 2009, 02:24:01 pm »
We have to change from doubter to believer. Now.

Offline StuH

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 5,877
  • Dalglish's marching army!
Re: How the mighty have fallen
« Reply #39 on: June 14, 2009, 02:38:47 pm »
Leaving Liverpool to win medals, I hope he never wins another thing in his life.

Yeah I hope he doesn't even win the bingo, or the pools, which is what he will be left with once he has pissed all the money he has left on the horses.

To be fair to Michael, fuck him.

:lmao

Liverpool were not doing well, had a new manager who might not adapt to English game, how long after that was it Gerrard nearly left? Real Madrid, a massive club with lots of money and star players come in for Owen, he leaves not a domestic rival but to a club in another country. which so very few England players are willing to do.

If a player from Arsenal or Sunderland (who were doing well at the time if I recall rightly) did that, we would be calling it ambition, wanting to win things and so on. As it is Owen and Liverpool, this seems to be a unspeakable and evil crime, doesn't seem fair

Not doing well? We had qualified for the CL which in all fairness is no worse than Arsenal have achieved this year.  We had a new manager with a proven record of success.... maybe, just maybe it was worth giving the club his career to that point a chance as they WERE showing the ambition he also had.

Gerrard situation is totally different, that was due to the incompetence of Rick Parry.

Lets just see how you feel when Fabregas fucks off with a year left on his contract after repeatedly assuring the fans he would sign a new contract?
He's a manipulative bastard. Another deliberate attempt to put pressure on people in the game, which he thinks he'll get away with because of his "standing" in the game and his fucking knighthood.