Author Topic: Worst ever official football merchandise  (Read 11806 times)

Offline elsewhere

  • Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think I mean African, so...
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 31,649
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #40 on: March 8, 2012, 06:13:39 am »
I know its the Rags but this is just sums up everything about them.

A jigsaw of a finance director.



http://www.amazon.co.uk/portrait-Manchester-United-Finance-Director/dp/B002113DSW

hahaha

Offline Yiannis

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 12,033
  • Reds fan from Greece
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #41 on: March 8, 2012, 08:56:10 am »
You should really read the reviews of that product on Amazon.Cracking stuff!
Messi in fact doesn't have a recognizable trait.

Offline lachesis

  • RAWK Scribe
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 10,046
  • МАРКСИСТ
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #42 on: March 8, 2012, 10:08:05 am »
You know instead of flag night, I'm a firm advocate of cape night.

Offline ChaChaMooMoo

  • From doubters to believers - Klopp 2015
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 6,870
  • Justice shall prevail.

Offline AndyInVA

  • Born in Liverpool, grew up in Yorkshire, live in the States
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 7,124
  • Never Forget
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #44 on: March 20, 2012, 01:26:57 pm »
I know its the Rags but this is just sums up everything about them.

A jigsaw of a finance director.



http://www.amazon.co.uk/portrait-Manchester-United-Finance-Director/dp/B002113DSW

check out the amazon review

brilliant


I've just had both my legs amputated and was feeling understandably less than enthusiastic about my future, but that was before I got this jigsaw of Nick Humby brought into hospital as a present, and now the future looks bright and I'm raring to go! In fact when I first unwrapped this jigsaw (at first I thought it was some slippers!) I fell out of my bed! This is because Nick Humby just happens to be my favourite ever man u financial director. Seeing Nick's happy, smiling face as he 'cooks the books' (ensuring the club can afford to spend top-dollar on the best players in Europe such as Bebe and Michael Owen) gave me a warm glow inside as I clambered back into my bed with the aid of a couple of nurses. This is one jigsaw I cannot wait to complete just as soon as I am back on my feet. My only quibble is the tie, which might have been a natty little green and gold number with a picture of sralic ferguson dressed as a red devil on the front. But beggars can't be choosers!

Offline Kochevnik

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 4,980
  • We all Live in a Red and White Kop
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #45 on: March 20, 2012, 01:46:13 pm »
This England-themed vibrator is up there:



But top marks have to go to this Man City suit from the 70's, which apparently was sold with blazer, flared trousers, cardigan, and tie.

Managers who have won fewer than three European Cups: Ferguson, Mourinho, Guardiola, Saachi, Hiddink, Hitzfeld, Clough, Happel, Trapattoni, Cruyff, Michels, Lobanovsky, Capello, and many more.
Managers who have won three or more European Cups: Bob Paisley

Offline Emlynevermore

  • Twinkletoes
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,134
  • Bounce!
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #46 on: March 20, 2012, 02:24:33 pm »
But top marks have to go to this Man City suit from the 70's, which apparently was sold with blazer, flared trousers, cardigan, and tie.

That is FANTASTIC. :wellin
Forza Viola!
Sitting in my car near anfield I've just had an amazing idea. Why not get behind the team?

Offline lfc_col

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 7,334
  • And Could He Play!
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #47 on: March 20, 2012, 02:53:56 pm »
But top marks have to go to this Man City suit from the 70's, which apparently was sold with blazer, flared trousers, cardigan, and tie.



That reminds me of the alan partridge tie and blazer combo set ;D
We Won It Six Times



JFT 97

Offline Geppvindh's

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 4,932
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #48 on: March 20, 2012, 02:55:56 pm »
check out the amazon review

brilliant

I've just had both my legs amputated and was feeling understandably less than enthusiastic about my future, but that was before I got this jigsaw of Nick Humby brought into hospital as a present, and now the future looks bright and I'm raring to go! In fact when I first unwrapped this jigsaw (at first I thought it was some slippers!) I fell out of my bed! This is because Nick Humby just happens to be my favourite ever man u financial director. Seeing Nick's happy, smiling face as he 'cooks the books' (ensuring the club can afford to spend top-dollar on the best players in Europe such as Bebe and Michael Owen) gave me a warm glow inside as I clambered back into my bed with the aid of a couple of nurses. This is one jigsaw I cannot wait to complete just as soon as I am back on my feet. My only quibble is the tie, which might have been a natty little green and gold number with a picture of sralic ferguson dressed as a red devil on the front. But beggars can't be choosers!

That is phenomenal :lmao

Offline Dubred

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,416
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #49 on: March 20, 2012, 03:31:22 pm »
I know its the Rags but this is just sums up everything about them.

A jigsaw of a finance director.



http://www.amazon.co.uk/portrait-Manchester-United-Finance-Director/dp/B002113DSW

 :lmao

Reviews are brilliant too!

Offline Blade

  • Not the sharpest tool in the box
  • Kopite
  • *****
  • Posts: 731
  • We all Live in a Red and White Kop
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #50 on: March 20, 2012, 04:06:24 pm »

Offline ChaChaMooMoo

  • From doubters to believers - Klopp 2015
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 6,870
  • Justice shall prevail.
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #51 on: March 23, 2012, 06:07:51 am »
Apparently an official kit. From 1992.


Offline The Red Dub

  • Main Stander
  • ***
  • Posts: 108
  • whats the story balamory
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #52 on: March 23, 2012, 06:37:55 am »
its a joke you cant get the irish shirt without a sponsor plastered on the front.worse thing is that it leaves a big mark after you peel it off.good job i have more than one like.
"Liverpool lost that sense of purpose when Steve ­Heighway was sacked, and the Anfield academy was restocked with over-rated, underwhelming, imported talent."

Offline ChaChaMooMoo

  • From doubters to believers - Klopp 2015
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 6,870
  • Justice shall prevail.
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #53 on: March 23, 2012, 08:32:35 am »


Quote
Technical Details
> This Photo Jigsaw features an image chosen by Manchester United. Estimated image size 432x305mm.
> Bespoke 300 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle 17x12 (43x30cm). The jigsaw is delivered bagged and on a back board making a superb gift. Also supplied are a re-sealable bag, a photo example of the image and a self assemble flat packed box for storage
> Image Description: A portrait of Gary Neville during a magazine photoshoot at Carrington Training Ground, 12 April 2004. Gary Neville photoshoot, Carrington, Manchester, 6/4/2004.
> For any queries regarding this item please contact Manchester United c/o Media Storehouse quoting Media Reference 7510
> © Copyright Manchester United

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Jigsaw-Neville-photoshoot-Manchester-United/dp/B00211L7NA/ref=pd_sim_sbs_k_h_b_cs_1

 :lmao

Offline Mirra

  • The Cock of RAWK. desperately seeking two fat ladies. His ass found glass in the grass.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 13,543
  • No one on the corner got a swagger like me
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #54 on: March 23, 2012, 08:52:04 am »



Suits the NUFC fans id say!

The Everton dvd was hilarious as well, im sure someone posted on here around the time a Everton CL Pass port holder, then they got KO'd in qualifying :D
Mirra, 7777 wake up the thread needs you!

Offline J-Mc-

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 28,637
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #55 on: March 23, 2012, 08:57:16 am »
Tbf to this...



If my missus walked in the bedroom wearing that, my cock would be harder than Chuck Norris.

Offline Danyaals Kop

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 8,285
  • allez les rouges
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #56 on: March 23, 2012, 09:13:28 am »

Suits the NUFC fans id say!


It sure does :lmao

Offline Mirra

  • The Cock of RAWK. desperately seeking two fat ladies. His ass found glass in the grass.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 13,543
  • No one on the corner got a swagger like me
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #57 on: March 23, 2012, 09:14:45 am »
It sure does :lmao

The famous fat twat at Newcastle who the shirt is based on as well didnt get a penny from it, which made it even more hilarious. I would of took them to court over it if it was me! Instead all he got was a free t shirt!! Hilarious. Ill try and find the link for it.
Mirra, 7777 wake up the thread needs you!

Offline ChaChaMooMoo

  • From doubters to believers - Klopp 2015
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 6,870
  • Justice shall prevail.
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #58 on: April 6, 2012, 11:55:47 am »
Mouse pad for 7€.

http://store.liverpoolfc.tv/Assets/Liverpool/Client/products/T/F/1/TF160_z.jpg
[Image too big]

An FA cup semis game vs Everton warrants an official merchandise? Sure enough it is a mouth watering affair. But are the owners so daft that they think of milking the fans for every match LFC plays by offering such products?

And this is not the only one. There are tees, scarfs and mugs as well. I dont know whether I should laugh or cry.

Offline Big Red Richie

  • Thread killer extraordinaire. For future reference the order is T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 14,535
  • We all Live in a Red and White Kop
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #59 on: April 11, 2012, 08:43:32 pm »
I was entertaining a mate over from Oz, earlier this week, who I haven't see for a few years.  Part of which, for my sins, I had to take her to visit the Man U mega store at Old Trafford.   Unfortunately, I've had to visit this place once before in life, so couldn't give getting lost as an excuse.

Anyway, there I am, strolling around this bright spanking store dedicated to all things, bog roll, feeling like the S.A.S. behind enemy lines, and I had a moment of clarity.

I started smiling to myself, and then very quietly, chuckling to myself.  My mate gives me this very puzzled face, as if to say, what the f*cks wrong with you.

I had to explain that I was having a tourette's moment, and it was taking all of my willpower to bite my tongue, and not burst into singing....  LIVERPOOL   LIV-ER-POOL.    LIVER-POOL   LIVER-POOL  LIVER-POOL.

In the end I just managed to keep it all in, which was probably a good job really, as the place had a coach load of Asian supporters picking the shelves clean, of all things tat.


Anyway.  I know many clubs stock all kinds of shite to make supporters part with their money, ours included, but as soon as I saw this peice of absolute useless shite, I instantly thought of this thread.


They're that f*cking mercenary, that they don't even throw away the grass cuttings from the Old Toi-let pitch, but they crompress the cuttings into dog turd coloured, medallions, and sell them to any old sap willing to part with their cash.


Sorry about the poor quality photo's, but the lens on my phone fogged up with the vapour of bullshit.

Offline libby_lfc

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Kopite
  • ******
  • Posts: 814
  • It's impossible to be unhappy in a poncho.
    • Twitter
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #60 on: April 12, 2012, 12:03:05 am »
Theatre of dreams? Sweet jesus. Hahaha.
People listen to Coldplay and voted for the Nazis, you can't trust people.

Offline lfc_col

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 7,334
  • And Could He Play!
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #61 on: April 12, 2012, 12:29:15 am »
Theatre of dreams? Sweet jesus. Hahaha.

You never heard that before they have been using that utter shite phrase for years
We Won It Six Times



JFT 97

Offline El_Pistolero

  • Has authorised the people of Newcastle to serial fellate him in a modern day Annabel Chong style nosh-a-thon.
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 12,891
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #62 on: April 12, 2012, 12:29:55 am »
Theatre of dreams? Sweet jesus. Hahaha.

To be fair it's the Theatre of many of my dreams. Mainly of it crumbling to the ground while Luis karate kicks Evra in the face.


True story.

Online Barneylfc∗

  • Cross-dressing man-bag wielding golfer. Wannabe Mod. Coprophiliac. Would like to buy an airline seat if he could. Known 'grass'. Wants to go home to He-Man
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 59,616
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #63 on: April 12, 2012, 12:52:14 am »


My mate actually bought that top one for Halloween 2 years ago. Wore it to my birthday party a few weeks ago too with a Suarez mask. He's not a whopper, honestly.

The girl one, if I ever see that in my birds size, I'm buying it.
Craig Burnley V West Ham - WEST HAM WIN - INCORRECT

Offline libby_lfc

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Kopite
  • ******
  • Posts: 814
  • It's impossible to be unhappy in a poncho.
    • Twitter
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #64 on: April 12, 2012, 01:13:34 am »
You never heard that before they have been using that utter shite phrase for years

This is my first full season supporting Liverpool, so I'm sure there's plenty I've not heard yet. RAWK is getting me up to speed fairly quickly though :P

To be fair it's the Theatre of many of my dreams. Mainly of it crumbling to the ground while Luis karate kicks Evra in the face.


True story.

Hahahaha. Can they all get a turn karate kicking Evra? Imagining Kenny do it is hilarious.
People listen to Coldplay and voted for the Nazis, you can't trust people.

Offline eirwen

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 6,767
  • We all Live in a Red and White Kop
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #65 on: April 12, 2012, 09:34:55 am »
Okay I'll admit I think the grass idea is pretty cool, but then again I'm the kind of person who buys all sorts of crap so  :P

Offline Big Red Richie

  • Thread killer extraordinaire. For future reference the order is T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 14,535
  • We all Live in a Red and White Kop
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #66 on: April 12, 2012, 12:01:58 pm »
Okay I'll admit I think the grass idea is pretty cool, but then again I'm the kind of person who buys all sorts of crap so  :P
Seriously?

You want a round flat dog turd, made of decaying matter?

Offline Ben_AFC

  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 1,076
  • It's magic you know, Two FA Cups in a row
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #67 on: April 12, 2012, 12:12:51 pm »
Seriously?

You want a round flat dog turd, made of decaying matter?

My mate has a handful of grass he took off the pitch at Highbury from the last match played there and had it mounted in a plastic case. I'm actually quite jealous, and the grass still looks fresh. In fact Arsenal sold square feet of Highbury turf for £25 I seem to remember.
w w w w d d w w w d w w w d d w d w w d w w w w w w w w w d w d w d d d w w. Arsena.

Offline Big Red Richie

  • Thread killer extraordinaire. For future reference the order is T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 14,535
  • We all Live in a Red and White Kop
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #68 on: April 12, 2012, 12:18:00 pm »
Yeah, but am I the only one looking at the fact that a piece of grass you've lifted yourself, or a piece of living grass you've replanted in your garden, as apposed to a cynically marketed flat pressed dog turd?

Maybe it's just me then.  :o

Offline paulrazor

  • Dreams of a handjob from Timmy Mallett. Chronicler of seasons past. Cares more than Prelude Nr 5, or does he? No chance of getting a banana at his house.
  • RAWK Scribe
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 28,613
  • Take me 2 the magic of the moment on a glory night
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #69 on: April 12, 2012, 12:22:35 pm »
this is brilliant
yer ma should have called you Paolo Zico Gerry Socrates HELLRAZOR

Online zero zero

  • Karma's a bitch. Innit.
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 15,475
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #70 on: April 12, 2012, 12:41:04 pm »
My mate has a handful of grass he took off the pitch at Highbury from the last match played there and had it mounted in a plastic case. I'm actually quite jealous, and the grass still looks fresh. In fact Arsenal sold square feet of Highbury turf for £25 I seem to remember.
Those are entirely different. But grass cuttings?

Offline Statto Red

  • Hung like a sperm whale but only around the middle. Proud owner of a couple of spare arms, although is pits pong like the bins, not very appealing. Bambi on ice.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 22,114
  • Kloppite
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #71 on: April 12, 2012, 01:05:05 pm »
Apparently an official kit. From 1992.



There was one even worse than that from 1996.


#Sausages

Offline paulrazor

  • Dreams of a handjob from Timmy Mallett. Chronicler of seasons past. Cares more than Prelude Nr 5, or does he? No chance of getting a banana at his house.
  • RAWK Scribe
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 28,613
  • Take me 2 the magic of the moment on a glory night
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #72 on: April 12, 2012, 01:25:46 pm »
There was one even worse than that from 1996.



the current green one is worse
yer ma should have called you Paolo Zico Gerry Socrates HELLRAZOR

Offline paulrazor

  • Dreams of a handjob from Timmy Mallett. Chronicler of seasons past. Cares more than Prelude Nr 5, or does he? No chance of getting a banana at his house.
  • RAWK Scribe
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 28,613
  • Take me 2 the magic of the moment on a glory night
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #73 on: April 12, 2012, 01:39:16 pm »
with regard to the united jigsaw this review is brilliant

22 of 22 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Stunning, just stunning!, 1 Dec 2010
By jmpezza - See all my reviewsThis review is from: Photo Jigsaw Puzzle of A portrait of Manchester United Finance Director Nick Humby from Manchester United (Toy)

I thought that Phil Townsend's jigsaw was the pinnacle of marketing but that was until I saw this fine jigsaw of Nick Humby. The blue of the shirt makes it very tricky, and somewhat confusing as I thought that he worked for Utd? If you look closely at the piece of paper he is holding there appears to be some financial details, written in crayon I believe. If I am not mistaken these are the notes that Roon Wayney handed over in his contract negotiations and it appears that he was only asking for £200 per week but there is a smudge that makes it look like £200k. How silly will Utd fans and board feel now that his original offer is in the open? If you also pay close attention to the monitor in the background you can spot projected earnings for 2010-2011 season and it appears that if they win the Premier League, League Cup, FA Cup, Champions League, winning bid for the World Cup and the 2042 Olympics they will have cleared 3 pence off their debt and will still owe the same as Ireland. I've got my fingers crossed for them, especially the League Cup. Surely they can beat West Ham with their eyes shut? (edit: United lost 4-0 for those that dont know) What's that...
yer ma should have called you Paolo Zico Gerry Socrates HELLRAZOR

Offline eirwen

  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 6,767
  • We all Live in a Red and White Kop
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #74 on: April 12, 2012, 01:44:17 pm »
lol the jigsaw and those reviews are the best!

Offline Statto Red

  • Hung like a sperm whale but only around the middle. Proud owner of a couple of spare arms, although is pits pong like the bins, not very appealing. Bambi on ice.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 22,114
  • Kloppite
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #75 on: April 12, 2012, 02:34:06 pm »
the current green one is worse

The current Green one is bad, but not as bad at that one from 96, remember one of the quotes the socks look like a tube of the sweets, Refreshers.

Some dreadful kits in the 90s, & the Goalkeepers were the ones who suffered the most.






#Sausages

Offline Noelle

  • iverpoo?
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 3,614
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #76 on: April 12, 2012, 02:43:04 pm »
This England-themed vibrator is up there:






Oh and if you're doing 90s kits, what about this number?

« Last Edit: April 12, 2012, 02:45:07 pm by Noelle »

Offline Rob K

  • He is the one and only! Naked and caked in mud
  • RAWK Supporter
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 10,429
  • Ron Fucking Swanson
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #77 on: April 12, 2012, 02:49:46 pm »
The current Green one is bad, but not as bad at that one from 96, remember one of the quotes the socks look like a tube of the sweets, Refreshers.

Some dreadful kits in the 90s, & the Goalkeepers were the ones who suffered the most.


Campos designed his own kits so he's got nobody to blame for that. :D
Give me all the bacon and eggs you have...

Offline greyfade

  • "I've seen things you people wouldn't believe....."
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,856
  • ★★★★★
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #78 on: April 12, 2012, 02:58:10 pm »

Offline Statto Red

  • Hung like a sperm whale but only around the middle. Proud owner of a couple of spare arms, although is pits pong like the bins, not very appealing. Bambi on ice.
  • Legacy Fan
  • ******
  • Posts: 22,114
  • Kloppite
Re: Worst ever official football merchandise
« Reply #79 on: April 12, 2012, 03:06:15 pm »
Campos designed his own kits so he's got nobody to blame for that. :D

I know a Goalkeeper designed his own kits in that period, but forgot it was him, thought it was someone else. ::)  Still awful.

Anyone remember the Cameroon one piece Shirt & Shorts kit circa 98?
#Sausages