Topic: The Laugh at Manchester United Thread or the 'Ban Thread' for idiots....?.

[Wabaloolah]

Mourinho, part of the reason he was sent of is because he is Marianne Fellani!! Ha ha what an utter helmet

[TomDcs]

Ugly fucking side, we are gonna need Spurs to wallop these, definitely can't rely on Arsenal to do so.

We need to wallop (word of the day) Watford.

[Kopite B205]

Boring, boring, boring.

[dalarr]

I marvel at the brilliance of Mourinho. A tactical masterclass indeed.

[blert596]

I marvel at the brilliance of Mourinho. A tactical masterclass indeed.

He is though, a complete fucking knob.

I hate the narcissistic c*nt.

[Miltonred]

Mourinho. I'd love to play for him...

"They started strong, pushed hard and I promised not to speak about players who weren't playing so I won't but we just didn't have the quality of players in midfield - we were missing quality there. "

He had Ander Herrera who played his heart out and was really the reason they beat Chelsea two weeks ago, plus scored on Saturday I believe. Cost them 24 million.
Elbows Fellaini - who is regularly in this team regardless of who is fit, and cost 27.5 million.
And Michael Carrick who cost 18 million in 2006, who also plays in his team every time he is fit to do so.

Add to that the fact that Mikhtaryan one of his "four targets that will make us competitive" and Martial essentially playing midfield/defensive roles. Another 60/70 million quid right there.

Fucking arsehole.

[Ziltoid]

24 fucking games, 0 defeats, 11 draws. It's not funny anymore.

No, its fucking hilarious. Isnt it? Well......?

Just off for my pampers.

[SerbianScouser]

Fucking arsehole.

It's no wonder Chelsea and Real players downed tools on him.

[BER]

If we end up sixth...

[Crosby Nick]

Mourinho. I'd love to play for him...

"They started strong, pushed hard and I promised not to speak about players who weren't playing so I won't but we just didn't have the quality of players in midfield - we were missing quality there. "

He had Ander Herrera who played his heart out and was really the reason they beat Chelsea two weeks ago, plus scored on Saturday I believe. Cost them 24 million.
Elbows Fellaini - who is regularly in this team regardless of who is fit, and cost 27.5 million.
And Michael Carrick who cost 18 million in 2006, who also plays in his team every time he is fit to do so.

Add to that the fact that Mikhtaryan one of his "four targets that will make us competitive" and Martial essentially playing midfield/defensive roles. Another 60/70 million quid right there.

Fucking arsehole.

Well said. Can't believe he never seems to get called out for this shit. Lampard was talking about the win at Anfield in 13/14 saying how he played it tight because they didn't have any attacking options or something similar. I know they had players out that day bit they still had the likes of Ba,  Torres,  Salah and Willian available. He's a fucking coward and it will be doubly galling if we lose out to them.

Compare our game at City to there's. Same end result but man, we're they achieved in different ways.

[Flaccido Dongingo]

That bollocks about not having quality in midfield, is his usual end of season gambit towards whichever mega rich employer he currently has, he needs new expensive shiny things each season, to mould into yard dogs, he's an absolute fraud

[Iska]

they still had the likes of Ba,  Torres,  Salah and Willian available

But they had no strikers that season.  They nearly won the league without any striker.  Even when they had Eto'o, Torres and Ba up front all at once, they didn't have a striker.  It was incredible management.

[Crosby Nick]

But they had no strikers that season.  They nearly won the league without any striker.  Even when they had Eto'o, Torres and Ba up front all at once, they didn't have a striker.  It was incredible management.

Indeed.  People love to mention however conceded more than Boro this season (thankfully no longer the case!). We'll these fuckers have managed to score one more than Bournemouth.

Imagine that after all their summer signings. It's unbelievable.  Boring bastard.

[GreatEx]

Even came out and said they were playing for a draw. Well they got the result they wanted, so effectively this was a win. You know what that means...

[Golyo]

He's an embarrassment to the sport, but it'll be hailed as another "masterclass", any other manager would be accused of anti football though, Duncan Castles will have wanked himself silly.

And you should celebrate him. He is one of the many who keeps this delusion alive. It would be great if this outdated Mourinho could stay a few seasons with them. He might even destroy the career of Martial and Rashford by then.

[jillcwhomever]

But they had no strikers that season.  They nearly won the league without any striker.  Even when they had Eto'o, Torres and Ba up front all at once, they didn't have a striker.  It was incredible management.

I was forgetting about that, that really was incredible. To be fair they didn't really have a team at all, it was all down to Jose, just like this season. He really is a one off in the best possible way.

[PeterTheRed ...]

24 fucking games, 0 defeats, 11 draws. It's not funny anymore.

Not funny? It is hilarious.

[Pelé as a Comedian]

they're like a 3 legged dog without Zlatan, Pogba and Mata. Mkhi didnt know what to do and just hid, Martial thought taking on 3 people was the way to go, if it didnt work the first few times it'd def work the umpteenth time. Rashford actually did some running but had nothing and no one to work with.

i doubt they'll add 10 5 goals to their pl tally this season.

also, TFM out injured and Fellaini red carded. what are the odds on Scholes getting a phone call sharpish..

[elbow]

And you should celebrate him. He is one of the many who keeps this delusion alive. It would be great if this outdated Mourinho could stay a few seasons with them. He might even destroy the career of Martial and Rashford by then.

Oh, he'll destroy them alright. No might about it.

[jckliew]

The Mouth - Masterclass Bus parker! Haha!

[kennedy81]

From the Guardian:

To sum up the second half, the home side accumulated 117 passes in the final third of the pitch. United managed seven.

[Omygoditsomar]

They're the star trek of football clubs. We will boldly go were nobody has been before outside our box.

[me76]

Awful, anti-football, bus-parking mofo.  What a joke.  I'd absolutely hate to be a good footballer used to playing exciting, attacking football - like Mikhitaryan, and be part of that complete shite.   7 passes in opposition's front third in an entire half!

[me76]

How appropriate that my 600th post goes to the team that loves being 6th!

[lessthanmatt]

Why play for a draw though? Is he going to play for draws away at Arsenal and Spurs too? There's like four games left and it's too tight up there to be throwing away two points before you start. They might find themselves needing to beat Spurs at WHL now. Maybe they think that's easier than beating City away, or they're just taking their chances with what the other teams will do

Am I missing some dynamic here? I know the draw tonight keeps it in their hands for now but it could be short sighted

[Chakan]

Why play for a draw though? Is he going to play for draws away at Arsenal and Spurs too? There's like four games left and it's too tight up there to be throwing away two points before you start. They might find themselves needing to beat Spurs at WHL now. Maybe they think that's easier than beating City away, or they're just taking their chances with what the other teams will do

Am I missing some dynamic here? I know the draw tonight keeps it in their hands for now but it could be short sighted

He's assembled the most expensive squad in football history, of course they are going to play for the draw.

[me76]

He's assembled the most expensive squad in football history, of course they are going to play for the draw.

Makes so much sense for a minnow to play for a draw away from home against one of the big teams!

[SwordInYourGut]

If we lose 4th place to this shower of shite, it really doesn't reflect well on us. Think Arsenal have a better chance than them.

[GreatEx]

I was forgetting about that, that really was incredible. To be fair they didn't really have a team at all, it was all down to Jose, just like this season. He really is a one off in the best possible way.

Demba Ba only scored that goal against us because Jose was in the technical area telling him what to do. "Hey Demba... Gerrard slipped over! The ball is loose! Run towards it! Take possession! Dribble in the direction of the goal! Kick the ball into the goal! Celebrate! FIGJAM".

[Petadroli]

Why play for a draw though? Is he going to play for draws away at Arsenal and Spurs too? There's like four games left and it's too tight up there to be throwing away two points before you start. They might find themselves needing to beat Spurs at WHL now. Maybe they think that's easier than beating City away, or they're just taking their chances with what the other teams will do

Am I missing some dynamic here? I know the draw tonight keeps it in their hands for now but it could be short sighted

He hoped to nick one on the counter... They had two chances to score, one when Bravo flapped around in his own area and just before halftime when Herrera missed with his header. In general it's more important not to lose for Mourinho. One loss and all of the sudden there will be more losses on the way... and draws against shit teams. He can draw his way to the Europa League title, so no worries there. In the league he is just taking his chances, because he knows that with that kind of fixtures coming up and his team's performances in big games, that they will never get 4th spot. So he just needs to keep the positive vibe of going unbeaten going. That's the most important for him.

If Gabriel Jesus winner stood, I have no doubt they wouldn't win against Swansea at the weekend... and maybe also lose away to Celta Vigo. But the injuries and red cards mount and I am just waiting for a car crash loss that knocks the stuffing out of them.

[jillcwhomever]

Demba Ba only scored that goal against us because Jose was in the technical area telling him what to do. "Hey Demba... Gerrard slipped over! The ball is loose! Run towards it! Take possession! Dribble in the direction of the goal! Kick the ball into the goal! Celebrate! FIGJAM".

Exactly the moment his status became legendary. 

[Nitramdorf]

Awful, anti-football, bus-parking mofo.  What a joke.  I'd absolutely hate to be a good footballer used to playing exciting, attacking football - like Mikhitaryan, and be part of that complete shite.   7 passes in opposition's front third in an entire half!

This is what I don't understand about the players in this pricks teams. Why don't some of the senior players call him out. If I was in one of his team talks where he was telling the team to use the dark arts, to cheat, defend in numbers, time waste etc. I'd be thinking 'what the Fuck.' I'm a footballer. Anyway, long may it continue until the day this stain has left this league and some other poor bugger has to put up with him.

[Bunter]

"Got the draawww tho maaayyyte, yer'all jealous"

Presumably they will do the same against Spurs, rotational fouling, stifle the game, men behind the ball, pray they nick one, hope they do that at Arsenal aswell. Will be very poetic when these draws end up their downfall.

[Purple Red]

This lot are a fucking embarrassment.

The teams above them must ensure they don't even get a sniff of top four.

[rowan_d]

Very strange how Mourinho gets more plaudits for the tactical setup when he plays for a 0-0 and gets it than anyone else does when their team wins 3-1 or whatever in the exact same fixture.

[Yevgeny]

Awful, anti-football, bus-parking mofo.  What a joke.  I'd absolutely hate to be a good footballer used to playing exciting, attacking football - like Mikhitaryan, and be part of that complete shite.   7 passes in opposition's front third in an entire half!

Mkhitaryan made the worst mistake of his life going there. He was majestic last season at Dortmund. Was obvious he would struggle under a drill sergeant like Mourinho.

If we do our job, we'll finish top 4. We can't afford another Palace though.

[Kekule]

Why play for a draw though? Is he going to play for draws away at Arsenal and Spurs too? There's like four games left and it's too tight up there to be throwing away two points before you start. They might find themselves needing to beat Spurs at WHL now. Maybe they think that's easier than beating City away, or they're just taking their chances with what the other teams will do

Am I missing some dynamic here? I know the draw tonight keeps it in their hands for now but it could be short sighted

He'll do the same at Arsenal and Spurs. Arsenal usually fall into the trap anyway, so why change it against them, and he's fortunate that he faces Spurs in their last game at White Hart Lane as Spurs will be going all out for a win to mark the occasion.  He'll sit back and try to pick them off as they come flooding forward.

[BarryCrocker]

Some trivia.

Of the eleven red cards in matches involving Pep Guardiola and Jose Mourinho, ten have gone to players managed by the Portuguese.

[DonkeyWan]

Jamie Jackson in the Guardian

https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2017/apr/27/manchester-united-city-derby-five-talking-points

Heh, that man's a fucking loon

[Felch Aid]

This lot aren't going to lose many games but you can't see them scoring either.

It's typical percentage football. Try and nick the lead and then 11 men behind the ball.

He's running out of options from the bench and his side are going to be knackered on consecutive weekends.

I see them drawing a few at best but I don't see them losing much simply because it's Maureen bus wanker tactics.