Topic: For REAL Relationship Issues. NOT your latest childish Tinder/Grindr FAIL!!!!!!!

[zero zero]

He did a video like that for one of them 

Oh you fucking tease. Hope this situation gets resolved soon so you can share them

I did this for one of my mates. Had a private chat and worded it a delicately as I could. He blocked me 

[CraigDS]

Is it wrong I'm kinda hoping he does another? I mean I don't as they are really pissing her off, but then they really are comedy gold and if he does another it really does give me a green light to go to town on them.

[Brian Blessed]

Is it wrong I'm kinda hoping he does another? I mean I don't as they are really pissing her off, but then they really are comedy gold and if he does another it really does give me a green light to go to town on them.

Craig, I think it's safe to say we all want him to post another.

[JerseyKloppite]

I did tell her I was going to write a response to the first one I heard, rap battle style... he then went and did some sort of classical rap (I shit you not) on the last one 

Oh you have to share it now

[CraigDS]

Oh you have to share it now

This was the last one. It's a real grower.

I mean it starts with some sort of electronic intro (about 40 seconds of it), using one of those instruments where you wave your hand in the air and it sounds like you're strangling a high pitched cat - I knew as soon as I heard that that this was going to be good.

Then he gets into his stage musical type singing which he seems to like, but then randomly bursts into this rap type thing which is done in some weird posh classical singing sort of way. It's hard to explain 

[NotBeenInAigburthSince2008]

This was the last one. It's a real grower.

I mean it starts with some sort of electronic intro (about 40 seconds of it), using one of those instruments where you wave your hand in the air and it sounds like you're strangling a high pitched cat - I knew as soon as I heard that that this was going to be good.

Then he gets into his stage musical type singing which he seems to like, but then randomly bursts into this rap type thing which is done in some weird posh classical singing sort of way. It's hard to explain 

A theremin and a posh boy rapping? It couldn't possibly be as deliciously awful as you describe it.

[CraigDS]

A theremin and a posh boy rapping? It couldn't possibly be as deliciously awful as you describe it.

A wannabe posh boy!

Change of tact from him last night, he decided to change his status on FB to "in a relationship" (no info on who with), bit bizarre when about 5 days ago he puts a song out about being there and waiting for my missus 

If he is then God knows what she's thinking about these songs. Or more likely it's because she called him out after this last song and made it clear she was with me, so he's decided to make up some relationship to save face/try and make her jealous? 

Bit gutted as might mean no new songs though 

[NotBeenInAigburthSince2008]

A wannabe posh boy!

Change of tact from him last night, he decided to change his status on FB to "in a relationship" (no info on who with), bit bizarre when about 5 days ago he puts a song out about being there and waiting for my missus 

If he is then God knows what she's thinking about these songs. Or more likely it's because she called him out after this last song and made it clear she was with me, so he's decided to make up some relationship to save face/try and make her jealous? 

Bit gutted as might mean no new songs though 

He's in a relationship with his music, man.

[Brian Blessed]

Or in his head with your mrs....just a matter of time before she sees the light.

It depends how much of a nutter he is.

[CraigDS]

Or in his head with your mrs....just a matter of time before she sees the light.

It depends how much of a nutter he is.

He's not exactly coming across as the sane type writing all these songs, so it's quite possible it's with her in his head 

Hey, if she's the sort who wants that sort of weirdness then he's welcome to her, but thankfully she draws the line at the amount of weirdness I offer (which isn't quite as much).

[Barneylfc∗]

Having more or less sorted my other shit out, I've now emailed my solicitor with a view to getting a court order for Steven. I just wish I was in a position to go for full custody, but formalising the current arrangement will have to do for now. 7 years, 3 months, and 21 days until I no longer have to deal with this fucking subhuman scumbag ever again. But I'm not counting.

[Jake]

Having more or less sorted my other shit out, I've now emailed my solicitor with a view to getting a court order for Steven. I just wish I was in a position to go for full custody, but formalising the current arrangement will have to do for now. 7 years, 3 months, and 21 days until I no longer have to deal with this fucking subhuman scumbag ever again. But I'm not counting.

Child Arrangements Order? Or just an agreement that one of your sols is gonna draft that you both sign? Be wary, the latter isn't binding.

[Barneylfc∗]

Full court order I want mate. Sick of her fucking about. At it tonight again and I've had enough. Ideally would have liked to have waited another couple of weeks to tie up a few loose ends, but the loose ends can wait.
My mum picked Steven up from school today, normally I get him at 6.30 from my ex's house. So as my mum had him, and he was happy enough playing with his mates, I decided to stay in work until 8 to make up a couple of hours. She found out and assumed I had left Steven in my mums to go round to see the baby, went down to my mums and took Steven before I'd got back at 8.15. Was going to go round to her house and have it out with her but decided to take a while out and calm down. Not rising to her shite and just firing away with the legal route is the best way forward.

[Jake]

She'll act a dick no doubt, make allegations against you and the court will ask cafcass to get involved, so make sure you're squeaky clean. 

[zero zero]

I'd be careful. I don't think she's done anything wrong and it's easy to paint you in a bad light over this.

[Red Viper]

It's good to go down the legal route if you're being messed around but you seriously need to be on best behaviour going forward. I work for a solicitors who specialise in child care cases so I see the kind of issues that get brought up time and time again.

For a starter, swerve the social media entirely when it comes to anything related to her or your kid. The amount of times I see slanging matches on Facebook get brought up in cases is ridiculous. Same goes for any text messages as well.

Also maybe give some serious thought to if there is anything that she can bring up that might disparage you. I don't know you personally so I'm just giving generic advice here based on issues that come up in these cases, but I'm thinking along the lines of drinking and any drug use. It's very common for parties to be ordered to submit to drug/alcohol testing.

Like I said, good to get something sorted in court but just be wary it could get even nastier.

[Barneylfc∗]

I'd be careful. I don't think she's done anything wrong and it's easy to paint you in a bad light over this.

Nothing wrong apart from being a pathetic c*nt, going round to my mums to take Steven when she knew he didn't want to go and was waiting on a pizza being delivered, then telling him when he got back to hers that I'm not fit to look after him and he won't be in my house anymore. If there's nothing wrong with that, then yeah I agree.

It's good to go down the legal route if you're being messed around but you seriously need to be on best behaviour going forward. I work for a solicitors who specialise in child care cases so I see the kind of issues that get brought up time and time again.

For a starter, swerve the social media entirely when it comes to anything related to her or your kid. The amount of times I see slanging matches on Facebook get brought up in cases is ridiculous. Same goes for any text messages as well.

Also maybe give some serious thought to if there is anything that she can bring up that might disparage you. I don't know you personally so I'm just giving generic advice here based on issues that come up in these cases, but I'm thinking along the lines of drinking and any drug use. It's very common for parties to be ordered to submit to drug/alcohol testing.

Like I said, good to get something sorted in court but just be wary it could get even nastier.

She tried to go to court before to get an order for reduced contact. Made a few allegations of drug abuse and other crap. I wrote my own response to her solicitor and it never went any further. Never heard from them again. She knows I have a beer when I don't have Steven. Fuck all wrong with that. Honestly can't remember the last time I had a beer when he was at my house. Probably at Christmas when we went to mums for dinner.
Came off social media a while back due to something else entirely.

[Red Viper]

She tried to go to court before to get an order for reduced contact. Made a few allegations of drug abuse and other crap. I wrote my own response to her solicitor and it never went any further. Never heard from them again. She knows I have a beer when I don't have Steven. Fuck all wrong with that. Honestly can't remember the last time I had a beer when he was at my house. Probably at Christmas when we went to mums for dinner.
Came off social media a while back due to something else entirely.

Good stuff. You should be fine in court then if all you are looking for is some stability over your contact arrangements. She'll only come off worse if she tries to fling any mud when what you're asking for is perfectly reasonable.

[zero zero]

Nothing wrong apart from being a pathetic c*nt, going round to my mums to take Steven when she knew he didn't want to go and was waiting on a pizza being delivered, then telling him when he got back to hers that I'm not fit to look after him and he won't be in my house anymore. If there's nothing wrong with that, then yeah I agree.

The whole point of shared custody is the idea that you have rights as a father and spending time with you is in Steven's best interests. Your mum is not part of the equation. At best your ex will demand (and likely get) first refusal when you don't look after him on your time. That means increased contact with her and giving her a window into your time with him. At worst she can argue that you don't take your responsibilities seriously as you choose to work late when it's your time to have him and then make a case to reduce your time.

You call your ex a c*nt in every post and she comes across as vindictive, so right now (and in the future) you've got to be squeaky clean when your son is with you.

Came off social media a while back due to something else entirely.

You're on here.

[Barneylfc∗]

Yeah, just like she chose to allow him to go to my mums straight after school when it should've been her time, or sends him overnight to her mums to go out drinking when it's her nights, or ask me to take him tomorrow afternoon when it's her time. 

And by social media, I mean Facebook.

[Jake]

Barney if she's even heard of rawk you'd better delete all your posts in here. Proceedings are private so any whiff of sharing it online and you'll be hammered by the judge.

[Crosby Nick]

Barney if she's even heard of rawk you'd better delete all your posts in here. Proceedings are private so any whiff of sharing it online and you'll be hammered by the judge.

Relax, he'll just get a new username.

RAWK witness protection.

[Brian Blessed]

Yeah, just like she chose to allow him to go to my mums straight after school when it should've been her time, or sends him overnight to her mums to go out drinking when it's her nights, or ask me to take him tomorrow afternoon when it's her time. 

And by social media, I mean Facebook.

Her assuming you went to see the baby, and her resulting actions are entirely predictable at this point. So in future, don't work the extra. You give her an inch and she'll take a mile.

[Barneylfc∗]

What's the general timescale for a court order then? First appointment with my solicitor tomorrow, and I'm fully expecting my ex to be as awkward as possible until a judge decides the outcome.

[Red Viper]

What's the general timescale for a court order then? First appointment with my solicitor tomorrow, and I'm fully expecting my ex to be as awkward as possible until a judge decides the outcome.

How long's a piece of string.

To be honest mate, the length of these kinds of proceedings is often determined by how co-operative the two parties are.

[Barneylfc∗]

How long's a piece of string.

To be honest mate, the length of these kinds of proceedings is often determined by how co-operative the two parties are.

Great. If she's aware it'll cost me more the longer it drags out, I've no doubt she'll drag it out

[Fiasco]

So, 10 weeks or so down the line and after being strong as I can be and not messaging a girl I was with for almost a decade, I get two emails from her asking am I in the pub (one where I usually drink at) because it's an emergency and she needs to know if I'm there or not because it's very important. Asking me to call her and whatever else. I have literally only just read the emails now, they were from last night around 10/11 pm and an hour or so apart.

I'm not stupid, if it was an emergency then what good am I? I'm not a paramedic or a police officer. It's just hit me for 6 seeing her name come up, especially as she was the one who ended it all. I think about her every day, and although I've resisted many urges to contact her I suddenly feel weak again. I know it's probably nothing more than her having a few wines and messaging an ex, people do that all of the time. But it's a fucker, I tell you.

[red_lfc_costello]

So, 10 weeks or so down the line and after being strong as I can be and not messaging a girl I was with for almost a decade, I get two emails from her asking am I in the pub (one where I usually drink at) because it's an emergency and she needs to know if I'm there or not because it's very important.

Sounds to me like she was on a night out or a date heading to that pub and was worried about bumping into you??

[zero zero]

So, 10 weeks or so down the line and after being strong as I can be and not messaging a girl I was with for almost a decade, I get two emails from her asking am I in the pub (one where I usually drink at) because it's an emergency and she needs to know if I'm there or not because it's very important. Asking me to call her and whatever else.

None of her business anymore. Or yours.

[CraigDS]

She's a twat mate. You know that from how's she's treated you.

Ignore her, ignore her emails.

[Chakan]

Just block her mate, what's it to her where you are at what time.

[Red Viper]

An emergency so she emails you 

Load of BS. Get her blocked.

[ChaChaMooMoo]

So, 10 weeks or so down the line and after being strong as I can be and not messaging a girl I was with for almost a decade....

I know how it feels. I am in the same boat as you are. It pains, yes, to see that you are made to suffer for no fault of yours. But stay strong and dont entertain any contact or attempt to contact of any way/shape or form. Its hard to do that. But it happened for a reason. Respect it. I hope you feel better, and find solace in a way that you are comfortable with, just like I am trying to find solace. Its hard. But stay strong champion.

[Oddball]

so i get the lovely news that my ex or whatever, wants to sue me, wants to press charges and says that I psycologically manipulated her and abused her, and that I'm at fault for everything that has happened to her. Keep in mind wwe are 3000 miles apart. She also says that because of the messages I sent to here and what I was asking or trying to figure out what was going on, i incriminated her in her current predicament with the law and others in some way which has caused her problems and others.

In other words I'm to blame for everything that has happened. She is going to place charges on  me in the country that I haven't been in for five years and don't live in.

Life is wonderful right now.

Oh wow. With it being quiet for so long I thought she'd moved on. Shit mate. Your in the States if I remember rightly, wheres she? And let her, she cant prove shit that didnt happen!

[CraigDS]

Let me guess, she will (or has?) asked for more cash to not press charges.

Still think you've been taken for a ride. Totally ignore her.

[gazzam1963]

I remember reading some of your posts defcato a few months  ago , how long have you known her ? And how often does she visit the states ? Because I presume you've never been to the balkans where she lives since you were 13

[deFacto please, you bastards]

I remember reading some of your posts defcato a few months  ago , how long have you known her ? And how often does she visit the states ? Because I presume you've never been to the balkans where she lives since you were 13

I've known her for ten years, I met her when I moved back and lived there for a couple of years.  She's been here once.

[CraigDS]

She's taking you for a ride, using threats to get more money out of you. She sees you as a cash cow.

Cut her out your life. Cut all forms of communication and move on with your life looking after yourself first.

[Crosby Nick]

She's taking you for a ride, using threats to get more money out of you. She sees you as a cash cow.

Cut her out your life. Cut all forms of communication and move on with your life looking after yourself first.

Agree definitely.

I've known her for ten years, I met her when I moved back and lived there for a couple of years.  She's been here once.

She's been to the US once in ten years? Definitely ignore,  what she can realistically do to hurt you from there.  Ignore her and move on, she's (wrongly) blaming you for her problems. Sounds like only she can sort them.

[gazzam1963]

So when were you last actually physically together ?