Hello. Sorry I'm late. Thanks for setting up the new thread, Prof, looks almost as smart as the new Main Stand.
Here's a little APLT preview for the weekend, cos it's Friday:
This weekend's APLT action kicks off down the road with a double-header, all star, all APLT clash between Jose Mourinho's Manchester United and Pep Guardiola's Manchester City. What a world we live in, eh? Who saw that coming?
Both sides shared identical league records last season, to end on 66 points apiece, or -24 on the APLT. This time they'll both be targetting the title rather than 4th place, and so far they've each made a decent case for that objective with their early running, with United holding to the 0 line and City sitting pretty on +2. This can't go on, though, as one side will be disappointed here. City's early form has seen them make short work of Sunderland, Stoke and West Ham, but this is the first real test for them as they leave the city of Manchester to travel to the home of their greatest rivals.
Sky Sports are billing it as the "standout game of the day" before a ball has been kicked, but has Pep got City playing his style of boring football this quickly? Has Mourinho really had time to turn Van Gaal's bunch of boring underperformers into his own kind of boring underperformers?
Who will rise? Who will fall asleep? Who gives a flying fuck? Hope they both lose.
It's a Par 1 for City, a Par 3 for United.
United win:
MCY +1
MNU 0
City win:
MCY +4
MNU -3
Draw:
MCY +2
MNU -2
Right, now that sordid business is out of the way, next up is Arsenal v Southampton
Arsenal surprised many last season in their traditional fourth place race by actually managing to finish second thanks to a rare gift from their friendly neighbours Spurs. That was thoughtful, Spurs. Some suspect that the Tottenham team may have realised that the only way to realise their long-term ambitions is to keep Wenger firmly in post as long as possible down the road, who knows? In any case, a rejuvenated Arsenal responded to this stroke of fortune and rise in status by collapsing in hilarious fashion against Liverpool on the opening day. For reasons I won't go into, I was sat among the Gunners at the Emirates for that, and I think I overhead some discontent. Still, they showed their mettle in the next match by drawing 0-0 v Leicester City. That's a par performance in the APLT these days, of course, so hats off to them. Their last game they won away to Watford. So they seem to be building towards some form, and the visit of Southampton will be a great opportunity to show their real colours.
The Saints themselves have secured just two points from their opening three matches and would doubtless regard a draw here as an excellent result.
It's a Par 3 as it's at home for Arsenal.
Arsenal win:
ARS: -1
Saints win:
ARS: -4
Draw:
ARS: -3
Speaking of Spurs, they're next up, with a visit to Stoke City, which has been rescheduled from a wet Wednesday in December for reasons the Premier League have yet to explain. Stoke had a landmark season last year, something that got a bit lost amid the general weirdness of the campaign, finishing above Everton and Chelsea for the first time since (actually I can't be bothered checking back that far, but it must be aaaages, right?) Mark Hughes' transformation of the Potters from Tony Pulis' route one elbow merchants into Barcelona on Trent has been a fascinating project, but it's hard to see how they could realistically rise much higher, and in football, if you're not improving, you usually decline very quickly. Could that be why Stoke currently sit at the foot of the Trad table, with just a single point taken on the opening day at Middlesborough? Hard to say, and it may well be too early to judge them for this season (although you can get 11/2 for them to go down, gambling fans) but Tottenham should make short work of this one. The Spurs are making up for last season's collapse in a two horse race by remaining unbeaten in the league so far, with draws against both Merseyside clubs sandwiching a win over London's Crystal Palace. They were a tough side to beat last season, and have at least retained that steel in defence. They will see this as a chance to gain ground in the APLT while Stoke will be desperate to get anything at all from the game.
It's a Par 3, all the same, and a win would put Spurs back onto APLT title-winning form for the season so far.
Stoke win
SPU: -3
Spurs win
SPU: 0
Draw
SPU: -2
Another all APLT clash next, as Liverpool play their first game of the season at home, to APLT Champions Leicester City. Enough has been said about Leicester's rise to the top last season, the debate over whether to include them in the APLT at all ran on and on until an entertainingly late stage, and I for one will be surprised if they are still there at the same stage this season coming. But they proved me, and pretty much everyone else, wrong last time out, so who knows?
Building work at Anfield has led the Reds on an early tour, and got two tricky away fixtures out of the way. A par-busting win at Arsenal and a credible draw at Tottenham are the sort of results that get APLT followers excited. Sadly the loss away to lowly Burnley undid the hard work and Klopp's men now need to play a run of games (with Par 1 trips to Chelsea and Swansea coming up) to par to stay in contention. Normally you'd expect the Reds to beat Leicester at home, in front of the biggest Anfield crowd since the 60s, on their first home match of the season, marking the home debuts of several exciting new talents. "Normal" just doesn't seem to apply to Leicester, though. Despite an opening day loss to Hull, the Champions pulled off a draw at Arsenal and dispatched Swansea to put themselves level with Liverpool on Trad table points. They will not be overawed by the occasion, that's for sure.
It's a Par 3 for Liverpool.
Liverpool win:
LFC: -1
Leicester win:
LFC: -4
Draw:
LFC: -3
Which brings us to the final APLT match of the weekend, Sunday's hotly anticipated clash between Conte's Chelsea and Guidolin's Swansea City. Bringing a touch of Serie A to the Premier League, this is, on paper, a mis-matched duel between the haves and the have-not-quite-so-muches of the modern game. And on the pitch, it's likely to be a similar story. High-flying Chelsea sit atop the APLT on +2, having a 100% league record in their matches to date against Watford, West Ham and Burnley (which, we can attest, is harder than it looks.) The Swans, meanwhile have just three points on the Trad table, thanks to an opening day win over Burnley (well maybe not so much, then. Piss off.) and defeats to Hull and Leicester. Anything but a Chelsea win here would be enough make Gary Lineker threaten to do MOTD completely billy bollocks, and even Swansea fans might baulk at that.
It's a Par 1, despite the Swans' poor pedigree.
Chelsea win:
CHE +4
Swansea win:
CHE +1
Draw:
CHE: +2
There you go. (Someone check the maths, I feel sleepy.)
