Dead Body FloatingAs we knew before we went to Istanbul this was a dead rubber. However, more of the dead body later on.
There are people out there who wouldn’t go to Istanbul and The Ataturk again because it diminishes their memories of our fifth European cup win. Absolute bollocks that is, does that mean that if you went to the first final in Rome, you wouldn’t have gone to the second? Aye I bet you wouldn’t.
However, less of the whining from me, I had a trip to go on. As usual these days, once Liverpool have played somewhere a no-frills airlines then starts flying there after the event.
Monday started off well, was down in Northampton on the Sunday doing some jobs for my mother so was on an early train back to Liverpool. Train got as far as Crewe before being cancelled due to line being shut. Over an hour late but more importantly would the line be reopen for the afternoon journey down to Milton Keynes and the coach to Luton Airport? Thankfully come mid afternoon and things were back to normal, so settled down with the paper and some red wine and headed south to eventually meet up with GlentoranMark and Will for our evening at the Holiday Inn Express at the airport.
Not much to say about the night as we’d been bored to death watching the Man City v Watford game on the telly. Mind things looked up once the takeaway curry arrived. So not long after midnight the three of us buggered off for a few hours sleep before the early flight on matchday.
For a change after check in at Luton didn’t bother with the bar but as usual loads of Reds around so the airport can’t complain about the takings being down. With only being a quick two day trip and just over 24 hrs actually in Istanbul I fancied being half with it by the time we got to Istanbul proper. Easyjet must have been happy with the extremely quiet flight due to most on board probably thinking getting extra sleep a better option for what would a long day for most of us.
After landing at Sabiha whatshernames airport, it was off to get the visa in the passport time. One man with a book of stickers and a long queue of about 100 people to sort. Considering you had loads of officials hanging around doing fuck all, could you at least open the second window yer fuckwits, some of us have a bar to go to.
The plan was to taxi it to Kadikoy on the asian side, and hopefully to see the Fenerbache ground on the way, well we got the taxi but didn’t see the ground, and taxi driver pointed us to where the ferries that plied the Bhosphorus went from.
Now here’s where the dead body comes in. Ferry leaves and stops at the jetty covering the train station before heading off towards Eminonu which is the terminus into Sultanahmet. All going well until ferry decides to stop and turn back towards the asian side. All the locals look at each other as if to say what the fuck, and full steam ahead to whatever had been spotted in the water. A small dingy appears alongside the article and what we suspected was someone floating in the water, but they have a grab and miss and don’t seem bothered, only to turn round and have another go. This time they manage to pull out a lifeless body and drag him onto the boat and by the look of him and his colour must be dead, only for Will to ask would it be bad form to take a picture as, after all, we are on holiday. So if I attach a pic of a body on this report don’t worry …
He didn’t take one.
What's that floating in the water.
What's that bobbing in the sea.
Just turn the ferry around and pick the body out.
Oh what a way to start a euro away.Not quite Ferry Across The Mersey but there you go.
Now that we’d finally arrived to the part of Istanbul, off on the tram to Sultanahmet proper to meet up with the normal gang. Take a bow Brenda, Lee & Ali, Jon G and his mate (memories gone so can’t remember his name) Scongil & Shazz, Dave (Anny Road) and Andy. Think that covers that lot. Mind Scongil had fucked off to get his obligatory Turkish shave mainly to get rid of his ear and nasal hair the old get. So finally after a ling trip some beer and then the need to go to hotel to check in.
Well the checking in part was easy, it was just the getting there and we thought ah great Brenda is going back and she can show us the way. First mistake was following Brenday, second mistake was when she admitted she was lost we should have gone back and the way the map seemed to show. Now geography isn’t obviously her strong point, confirmed by the fact she left Liverpool to move to Corsica and ended up in Jersey… Less said about the bloke who showed us the way, does anyone in Istanbul actually know where streets are, as I don’t believe they do.
At the hotel we meet Colin who seems a nice lad so how the hell he is unlucky to know Tiger Tony is beyond me. Lovely hotel but perturbed with the heart shaped cushions that seem to be in every room, but cheap enough and also rooms had mini bars which might have come in handy unless yer names Jon Guard.
Five minutes later and back to a bar in Sultanahmet called Sah Bar, went in and then realised I’d been in there before on the Monday before the European cup final and we spent the next few hours in there apart from popping to the local kebab takeaway round the corner.
It’s off to the match we go, well it would be if the buses laid on were in the right place. Sultanahmet Square was the place, but they weren’t there but further along past the Blue Mosque. Local bizzies seem to think that beer wasn’t allowed not that any notice was taken, so an hour later after a sing song and beer, and we were back to the Ataturk and the end Milan occupied. Yes the losers end, which might explain why we lost this game.
As usual in these reports the game barely gets reported as such apart from any strange goings on from within the ground. Notable mentions to the polystyrene sheets to sit on which ended up being turned into snow and thrown around; whatever the reason for Jon G and Ali to start doing Walk Like An Egyptian is beyond me, and no really I don’t want to know; last thing of note was Lee & Ali fetching their banner and not actually realising Robbie had scored his second. Obviously deafness rules in the family as they missed us cheering and chanting Fowler just after this.
Back to Sultanahmet after the match once they’d let us out and then tried to kill us off with diesel fumes, and back to Sah Bar to while the hours away singing, dancing (well if Dave actually thinks that’s called dancing) and finally having to eased out at 3am. As we were leaving it appears one of our entourage had helped himself to a bottle of wine from the rack next to the door, but promptly dropped it outside and left the others to pick up the pieces. No names mentioned to save the embarrassment for Jon G.
So with nothing seeming open locally especially kebaberies, we headed off back to hotel to try and get some sleep in, only to be interrupted by some noisy fuckers. No not Will and his farting from the room next door - I’m assuming the locals don’t have proper alarm clocks due to the fact that at bastard 6am the local Mosques decided to have a wake Hally up competition whilst calling to prayer. 6fuckingAM for fucks sake. So if you know any Istanbul locals buy them an alarm clock for Christmas.
Won’t mention the taxi driver on the way back apart from the fact he is one of the reasons taxi drivers get a bad name the fucking twat, completely different from the one on the way in who didn’t attempt to rip us off.
Anyway, less of the shite from me. Thanks to all who went as normal to support the team, well those who left the bars and made the trip to the stadium. And thanks for Dave for giving me a lift from Luton back to Liverpool this evening.
Roll on February.
© Jon Hall 2006
