The Alchemist

Posted by Byrnee on November 4, 2004, 07:14:35 pm

In the late 1600's, the Professor of Mathematics at Cambridge University changed the world with his intellect, revealing mysteries that had baffled scientists since man walked the earth. He explained Gravity and the world around us and invented Calculus. He was a scientist, a mathematician and a genius.

Yet for all Sir Isaac Newton contributed to the human race, his true passion was an obsession with the science of Alchemy. It was one of the few things at which he did not succeed. Now a modern day Spanish Professor may be closer to realising Newton's dream. He is the new supremo at Liverpool FarmaCeuticals.

His predecessor, a French Professor, came close to the formula too, alas for all his efforts, M. Houllier's stint was to end in failure. Certainly, there had been successes during his internship - the re-emergence of Liverpool FarmaCeuticals as a European name again. He certainly put the company back on the scientific map. Yet, as Newton's Third Law of Motion suggested: Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.

The organisation had almost instant success in 2001, where they won a total of five prizes for excellence in their field (though certain envious parts of the scientific community belittled up to three of these prizes). Newton's law was sadly proved correct as their fortunes took just as dramatic a turn for the worse a couple of years later, when they failed to achieve the requisite results that would have been sufficient for a place in the European community, thereby losing a large grant to a rival London company.

All this was a far cry from the time just a year before they contested a place within the European elite losing out, by a whisker, to Bayer Pharmaceuticals. Eventually this summer just past time was called on Professor Houllier's tenure, a sad day for some, a relief for others. For those who were upset at Houllier's departure, the Board acted quickly to replace their supremo with another respected academic.

Prof Benitez quickly rose to the top in his native Spain, last year receiving National and European commendations at the Valencian Scientific Institute. However, all was not well beneath this happy exterior. Benitez once famously declaring his dismay at the VSI Board's interventionist policies: "They have bought me a Bunson Burner,' he declared, 'When I asked for a Pipette."

Liverpool sensed the unease and made Prof Benitez an offer he could not refuse. The importance of this appointment will not be known for some time yet there is an air of optimism around the company at the moment. His initial experiments so far have achieved mixed results yet shown distinct signs of progress.

And all this has been achieved with the loss of a number of key elements. One base element, Cissium, was recently ruled out of use for about a year and a replacement substance can only be shipped in (most likely sourced from Spain) in January. Some would also have thought that without the base element Gerrardanium for example, the experiments would have been lacking something and perhaps failed altogether.

Instead the illustrious Professor Benitez has somehow moulded together other components for results bizarrely stronger than the sum of their parts. The step to Alchemy is not far away - he is already turning two hitherto unremarkable elements, namely: Ig25 Biscanium    &    Dj21 Traoreum   
                                                   
into more stable components and essential to the success of his experiments.

With the added exciting new blend of Alonsoxide, Josemium, Garciaride and the as yet untested Nunezium, he seems to be turning these base elements into something very precious indeed, getting closer to perfecting his alchemic formula. The scientists who await these results with almost fervant support for the company are excited. They have every reason to be, for Professor Rafael Benitez may be about to succeed where Sir Isaac Newton failed. He may yet turn Liverpool FarmaCeuticals into Gold.

© Byrnee 2004

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